Gonna Have to Thank Starlight for Letting me Vent Some Anger on Cheese Legs, even if not the Same One.
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I gasp, sitting up quickly, shaking my head.
Phew. Even if it was weak, I was still able to make the spell so I woke up fast. I don’t know how fast, but I don’t care right now.
“Screwball! Thank goodness you’re alright!”
I’m suddenly glomped into a hug by the princess.
“Twilight, what the fuck?!” I cry, struggling to pull out from her grip. Then, I realize what I just said and look up to her sadly. “Twilight! I... I’m sorry you had to go back to that future.”
Twilight shakes her head, though doesn’t look as sad as you’d expect after heading into that timeline again. “We didn’t.”
I blink, before cocking an eyebrow. “Come again?”
“The future Starlight sent us to wasn’t that one with the war against the Crystal Empire,” Spike says from atop her back. “In that one, things are sort of normal.”
I frown. “Sort of normal?”
Twilight sighs, letting me go, her eyes dejected. “In that future, Sunset Shimmer won against Celestia. She came back through the mirror, finished Starswirl’s spell and became an Alicorn, overthrowing the princess.”
I just stare, not sure if I’m processing that right.
After a moment, I frown and swipe a foreleg in front of myself, opening up a magic screen full of little dots. One blinks and I see what Twilight means. Sunset is an Alicorn in that timeline and did take over... after sending Celestia into the EQG world and trapping her there by smashing the mirror?!
“Right. Remind me, after we’ve stopped Starlight, to go to that world and fix the mirror,” I tell Twilight, before my words catch up with me. “Oh, shit! Starlight! We gotta stop her before she stops the Rainboom again, like now!”
We take off, finding Starlight once again talking with Fluttershy and the colts, but they seem to be wrapping up. As we get closer, I hear Hoops saying something to Fluttershy that, if not for what happened earlier, I never would’ve thought could come out of his mouth.
“Come on, Fluttershy. Maybe I can help you get through the course this time.”
“Well, I-I sure could use the practice...” Fluttershy says as the three trot off just as Twilight and I land in front of Starlight.
“Wait,” I call out, but they’re talking amoungst themselves and don’t seem to hear me.
Crap!
“I know you only convinced those bullies to not tease Fluttershy to stop the Rainboom!” Twilight’s voice causes me to turn and glare at Starlight.
Said unicorn is smiling at Twilight in a mocking manner. “Oh, that’s not true. I convinced them not to be bullies because everypony should be equal.” She glares. “Stopping the Rainboom is just a bonus.”
“Look!” Spike’s voice grabs my attention and I see Rainbow flying nearby.
Twilight glares at Starlight. “This isn’t over yet!” she says, before flying off.
Starlight sneers, calling, “If you say so!”
“If I didn’t have to clean up your mess right now, I would so make you suffer right now, Glimmer!” I snarl, pointing a hoof at her.
She just glares back. “Didn’t stop me before. What makes you think you three can this time?”
I glare, before flying off after Twilight. I manage to catch up to her, finding her chatting with filly Rainbow Dash.
“...you want to race?” Twilight’s asking as I stop.
Rainbow frowns. “Um, that wouldn’t really be fair. I mean, you’re a full-grown pony, and...” She trails off, before her eyes widen. “Wait. Are you an Alicorn?”
Ah. Okay, this can work. I’m a filly, so Dash will have no problems with wanting to race me. All Twilight has to do is correct Dash and I’ll make her have to fly so fast to beat me that she’ll create the Rainboom and—
Twilight puts a foreleg around Rainbow. “Come on, I thought you were fast!”
I facehoof. Okay. This might not work as well as I’d hoped. For such a smart pony, Twilight can be so stupid, sometimes.
Dash gets a nervous look, which I can’t blame her for, really, before backing away as she pulls out from Twilight’s hold. “Uh, actually, I just remembered I have somewhere I need to be.”
And she flies off.
Way to blow it, Sparkle.
Before I can say anything though, Twilight flies after Dash. Well, this can’t go wrong, can’t it?
“Okay, listen,” she’s saying as I catch up. “You don’t have to race me. I just need you to fly fast enough for a Sonic Rainboom!
Rainbow stares at her in shock. “What?! I can’t do that! Nopony can! It’s not even a real thing! It’s just an old mare’s tale!”
“But it’s not! I know it’s not! I’ve seen you do it!” Twilight flies really close to her. “In the future!” and finished by... twirking her eyebrows? What the fuck?!
“Ooookay...” Rainbow days, looking and sounding understandably creeped out, “I’m gonna go now.”
“No!” Twilight calls as the filly flies off. “Wait!”
Twilight looks down sadly.
“Gee, Twilight,” Starlight’s voice says before I can say anything, “what’s the matter? Couldn’t convince her to do the impossible? That’s too bad.”
We turn around, Twilight looking like she had something rude to say, before the portal opens and we’re pulled back through it.
___________________________________________________________
We all grunt as the portal dumps us on the Map and we tumble off it, myself only bothering to pay the slightest attention to the fact that it’s glowing all green.
“Well, that didn’t work,” Spike says as we all get up.
“This is gonna be harder than I thought.” Twilight says as she puts a hoof on the Map. “We’ll have to try again!”
“Not that we’d have to if you’d just used some fucking common sense!” I snarl.
“Huh?” Twilight looks at me in shock.
I snort. “I’m a filly, Twilight! You suggested a race to Rainbow and she made a point to you about you being an adult while she’s a filly! You could’ve gotten her to race me, because I’m around the same age she was! Hell, you could’ve even used the fact she realized you’re an Alicorn to convince her to race me! I could’ve easily gotten her to do the Rainboom!”
I toss my head.
“But, instead, you keep talking to her as if you weren’t at an age where a filly would be creeped out by that and even fucking twirked your eyebrows at her! What the fuck was that?! Any kid would with half a brain would have the words Strange Danger blaring in their minds after that! And you’re supposed to have been Celestia’s star pupil?! How, when you make such a dumb as fuck mistake as that?!”
“Guys?”
“What?!” I yell, turning to Spike. “After what she just pulled, I—”
My words are cut off when several spears are pointed at my neck.
Several ponies are surrounding us, including Berry Punch, Carrot Top, Bon Bon and Note Worthy coming up from behind and—
“Pinkie?” Twilight gasps. “Fluttershy?”
Pinkie shoves a spear closer to Twilight. “Silence, changeling!”
Changeling? What?
They’re all wearing some kind of green salve in patterns on the bodies and faces. They look like warriors from a stereotypical jungle tribe.
“All servants of Queen Chrysalis found in these woods must be... destroyed!” Fluttershy says.
...
I think I just peed myself in fear a little.
How in the...? Since when did Fluttershy grow a pair of ovaries?! The... did Discord make her the opposite— No, wait. She’s normal. I don’t sense any effects of Chaos Magic around her.
But... what the fuck?! Fluttershy openly saying, without a shred of uncertainty, that she’s willing to kill?!
Good, Lord, maybe this world is worse than that Sombraverse after all. Holy fuck!
Twilight waves her hooves frantically. “Wait! We’re not changelings! She and I are ponies!” she indicates to her and myself, then Spike. “And he’s a dragon!
Pinkie Pie comes right up to Spike, pointing her spear what would be alarmingly close to his neck if, ya know, he wasn’t a dragon. “ A likely story! Do something dragonish!”
Spike responds immediately by belching smoke with the hints of flames behind them into the mare’s face.
Pinkie Pie coughs, before wheezing, “That works!” and backs away a bit.
Fluttershy thrusts her spear forward. “The servants of Chrysalis will do anything to save their evil skins!”
All fear I was experiencing vanishes and I find myself deadpanning. Really? Spike proves he’s a dragon and they accuse us of being Cheese Legs’ servants?
I take it back. Fluttershy is bolder... but clearly lost some of her intellect in order to gain that boldness.
“Well, you all just lost your edge over...” I trail off, as whom she just mentioned clicks... and a slow, sinister sneer starts forming on my face.
It clearly doesn’t go unnoticed, as the Tribe Ponies, as I’ll nickname them, all tense up, some looking a little nervous.
Twilight looks my way and flinches back.
“Uh... Sc-Sc-Screwball?” Spike asks, shaking where he stands. “Wh-what’s going on?”
I gave a creepy, light giggle. “I get to have my revenge sooner than I’d hoped, even if in an alternate timeline.”
“Screwball,” Twilight says in that tone you give someone when you’re trying to get them not to do something they really don’t want you to do and are nervous what your reaction will do, “now really isn’t the time to make these ponies have any other reasons to not trust us.”
I glance at her, then back at the Tribe Ponies, my expression switching right to nonchalant. “Why? How am I supposed to be scared of a bunch of ponies waving liquorice sticks topped with marshmallows?”
As Fluttershy jabs her spear in my direction, it goes a bit floppy, it and all the others’ spears literally turning into liquorice sticks topped with marshmallow spear heads.
“Wh-what the—?” Bon Bon cries, looking at her spear.
“What kind of twisted magic is this?!” Note Worthy says, glaring at me. “Since when could you Changelings do this?!”
“Stop!” the sudden additional voices causes us all to look up and... what the heck? Zecora’s standing on an outstretched branch, with a massive Mohawk and wearing salve like the others, though hers has a big green H between her eyes... for some reason. “If they are changelings we’ll soon see.” She hops down, landing in front of us. “Though I think they’re not what they appear to be.”
Twilight visibly relaxes a little. “Zecora! Please, you have to listen.”
Zecora holds up a hoof, shushing her, before taking a wooden bowl off the vine-like belt around her waist, dipping her hoof into it. “Beneath this salve, no changeling hides, for it reveals the truth inside.”
She paints all three of us, my designs looking like swirly patterns going up my body, criss-crossing around my eyes and legs.
At once, all three of us start glowing with a green light. Hmm. This salve seems to know we’re not from this version of the timeline. Interesting.
The reaction of the salve causes the Tribe Ponies to gasp and quickly back away.
Pinkie is the only one brave enough to step closer to Zecora. “What does it mean?”
Zecora frowns in thought for a few moments, before stepping closer to us, then looking out at the ponies. “The meaning is far worse, I see, for it is we who should not be.”
Twilight nods. “I think I can explain.”
Zecora nods back. “I’m sure you can, but let’s not talk here. Chrysalis and her army will soon draw near!”
“Good,” I grin, punching one hoof into the flat of the other. “Bring ’em on. I’ve been meaning to pay them back for what they did.”
Zecora gives me a contemplative look, before shaking her head. “You may wish to fight them here, but losing those in my care is something I fear.” She comes closer, looking me in the eyes with a stern stare. “You may have no quarrels with risking your life, but do you wish to cause you two friends or my charges further strife?”
I frown, folding my forelegs. “Fine. But first chance I get, I’m taking those insects out, permanently. I gave them a chance for the better, and they threw it back in my face. All bets are off.”
She nods, before we head off, myself deciding to walk, just in case a Changeling is nearby that I can’t sense. With the way the energy is so odd in this timeline, it could be messing with my ability to tell when a Changeling is near or not.
As we walk through the forest, with several ponies always scouting ahead before we move on, Zecora explains to us what happened.
The wedding never got a chance to happen. During the events of what Zecora describes as a very different version of Dragonshy, Celestia herself went to deal with the dragon. But when she went back to Canterlot, it was already overrun by the Changelings and she was soon captured and, with Sunbutt out of the way, Queen Cheese Legs just outright invaded all of Equestria.
“The changelings took over not long ago. Though I’ll wager in your world that isn’t so.”
Twilight Sparkle shakes her head, myself walking a little ahead of her so I can hear the conversation. “Chrysalis and her army tried to take over Canterlot, but my friends and I stopped her.”
“Sorry, but... no ya didn’,” I say bluntly. “Cadance and Shining Armour stopped her. You guys got yer asses handed to ya.”
Zecora shakes her head. “Those friends as you know them are not here, alas. But tell me how all this came to pass.”
Twilight Sparkle looks down. “Starlight Glimmer, a pony who traveled back in time to stop my friends and me from ever coming together!”
Zecora cocks an eyebrow. “And it is these friends you have in life that keep Equestria free from strife?”
Twilight looks away with uncertainty. “I guess so. But this is the third time I’ve come back and this world is even worse than the first one! The one right before this wasn’t as bad, but it still wasn’t a good one. If Starlight keeps doing the same thing in the past, how could the present be so different?”
Zecora smiles sagely, stopping near a very small stream of water, more like a trick, really. “Ah. Time is a river, where even the tiniest changes seen,” she places a hoof in the water’s path, causes the way it flows to change, “can lead to a cascade of effects downstream.”
I roll my eyes. “Really, Twilight, that’s time law basics 101. Have you never read Alien Alicorns and Space Pirates?”
Twilight gives me a deadpan look. “The science there is preposterous. Why would I read something so ridiculous?”
I cock an eyebrow. “This coming from the time travelling Alicorn Princess.”
She frowns and we remain silent for the rest of the trip.
Several minutes later, Zecora stops in front of a large clump of vines hanging from a tree. “This part of the forest is dark and damp, but it’s done well to hide our camp.”
As she speaks, she parts the vines, revealing a small forest village. I look around, spotting several ponies I recognize, Raindrops, Sparkler, Miss Cheerilee, among others... but not Diamond or Daddy.
I look down sadly at that, trotting along with the rest as we walk into the village, before my eyes shoot open.
I sense a Changeling! And it’s close! Right here, in the village close!
I quickly turn my head this way and that, trying to find them, before my eyes narrow in on a cream Pegasus filly with a purple mane and tail and no Cutie Mark.
Gotcha.
Before I can say anything, however, a very familiar shriek rings out and I turn my head to see Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Applejack hurrying out from some nearby bushes... looking rather raggedy.
“Please!” the alabaster mare says. “You have to help us!”
Rainbow Dash catches her breath. “The changelings attacked Ponyville! We barely escaped with our lives!”
I find myself deadpanning. Really? That’s their best lie?
Thanks to already looking for Changelings and just spotting the little spy, the moment they came close I got another three signals for Changleings.
And, if the invasion happened as long ago as Zecora told us, Ponyville would’ve been gone ages ago. Do they think this village is stupid?
I blink, suddenly noticing how one of the three feels different from the other two, it’s the one in the back, disguised as AJ.
I stare for several moments, before that sneer I was wearing back at the Map slinks onto my face again and I start giggling.
“Hey!” “Dash” yells, glaring at me. “What, you think our home being destroyed is funny?”
The others are all looking at me too, Zecora with a frown that tells me she has an idea why I’m giggling, but doesn’t approve, not that I care for her approval on this.
“You can drop the act, Queen Cheese Legs,” I sneer at “AJ”, who gives me a curious raised eyebrow. “Zecora, care you explain?”
The zebra nods, before looking firmly at the three supposed ponies. “The only changeling attack I see is the one that come here looking for me!”
Applejack smirks, stepping forward. “It’s taken quite a while to find you, Zecora.”
She starts laughing, but is cut off when her disguise vanishes with a farting sounding.
“What in the...?” she frowns, glancing to the two ponies standing behind her, who shrug.
“What? You thought I was going to let you make a big, intimidating entrance?” I give her a cocky grin. “Not likely. Frankly, you should’ve taken on the Rarity disguise. You’re more of a drama-queen than she ever was, so it’d have fit you better.”
She gawks at me for a moment, clearly struggling to find words due to the shock of a filly talking smack to her.
I chuckle. “Oh, and don’t think you’re little surprise attack is gonna work. Since we know it’s you, you’re chances of tricking us to lowering our guard is gone.”
Cheese Legs sneers. “So, you figured out who I am. Too bad it was too late.”
At once several of the Tribe Ponies step forward, their spears (which I changed back after Zecora gave us the all clear back near the Map), aimed at the queen.
She chortles. “Come now, Zecora. You’re clearly outnumbered.”
As she speaks, the two “ponies” with her drop their disguises, revealing Changelings.
A few moments pass and the Changeling Queen blinks in confusion, a slight frown crossing her face as she looks up.
“What? You thought you’d ambush us?” she turns to me as I give her a sly smirk. “You really aren’t putting two and two together here, are you, Cheese Legs.”
Her brow narrows. “Stop calling me that.”
I snicker. “Make me, Cheese Legs.”
She pulls her lips back in a snarl, before glaring at the Changeling on her right. “Where are the troops?!”
He looks nervously from her to the sky. “I... I don’t know, you’re Highness,” he says in a deep voice that takes me a little by surprise.
I’ve already met many Changelings and personally know three and none of their voices sound as, well, normal as his. They all have a kind of highish sound.
I notice the Changeling disguised as a filly looking uncertainly at the Changeling that had spoken, as if worried for him.
Frowning, I focus more on that Changeling... and notice something odd and familiar. It’s Pharynx, a scout who’s job in the hive was to guard it, along with others, of course, who, after I’d taken the Changelings in our timeline to the Empire, had gone into the Crystal Royal Guard... and likely was the one who informed Cheese Legs of my disappearance, now that I think about it.
Huh. Strange. He’s still wearing a disguise. Unlike most other Changelings, Pharynx has purple eyes, a purple back and wings and a red fin on his head and for his tail, unlike all the usual light-blue eyes and wings, blue back and black fin and tail Changelings normally have, but, after dropping his pony disguise, he’s wearing another that makes him look like every other Changelings.
Guess, Cheese Legs doesn’t want him to stand out or something.
I shake my head. I can worry about that some other time, for now... I’m gonna have some fun.
“So, Cheese Legs,” I say, grinning at the irritation on her face as I continue with that moniker, “just what have you done since taking over Equestria? I want as much as I can put on your rap sheet, after all.”
She gives me an odd look, before smirking. “And you think you can stop me? That purple unicorn though so too before...” She trails off, having noticed Twilight in the crowd. Her eyes widen in both shock and... confusion? “What? You’re alive?! How? And... how and when did you become and Alicorn?!”
I would laugh at her shock of seeing Twilight as an Alicorn, but my mind is caught on something else she said.
The air around me goes could as I feel equal amounts of shock and rage. “Alive? ALIVE?! YOU KILLED TWILIGHT?!”
She looks back to me, her expression souring. “Clearly not as well as I’d thought.”
There’s silence for a few moments, before I giggle. But it isn’t a childish one like before. It’s heavy, something little children really shouldn’t make.
It causes the ponies from the village to back up slightly and even Cheese Legs seems a little off-put.
“I guess this is one thing I’ll have to thank Starlight for,” I say nonchalantly, floating up into the air. “Even if you’re not the exact same Cheese Legs from my timeline, I can still have my fun.”
“Get her!” she orders, pointing a hoof at me.
Her two cronies charge, only to freeze in place, literally, before dropping to the ground.
She blinks, confusion playing over her.
I start to giggle softly, the sound rising with every few seconds. “Tick tock, goes the clock and what now, shall we play? Tick tock, goes the clock, for all the evil you’ve done, the time has come for you to pay.”
At once, the Changeling Queen shrieks as her legs suddenly bend upwards, horrible, loud cracking sounds coming from them, before she collapses due to having nothing to stand with.
Everypony stares in horror as I slowly advance on her, my face pulled back in a twisted sneer as my body shifts into my anthro self.
“Scary, isn’t it?” I ask, as she stares at me with eyes filled with pain. “Having no control, not being able to just do what you want? Being at the mercy of one who has no care for your wellbeing?” my expression turns dark. “That’s your ideal world, bug. Where you control all and no being can do anything without fear of you taking them down! Scared that any second could be their last, just because you want to end their lives without cause!”
Silence rings out for several long moments, no pony daring to make a sound aside from the Changeling Queen as she gasps for air and winces from the pain.
“I’ve spent many nights, wanting to get back at you for that,” I leer down at her, before thrusting my arm down, grabbing her by the throat and lifting her up so we’re eyelevel. “Wanted to find you and put you through so much pain, you’ll beg me for death!”
She winces, struggling desperately to move her legs, the pain it’s causing her is evident with each small movement she makes.
I snicker. “I gave you a chance, in my time.” She into my eyes, fear entering her own for what is probably the first time in this version of the timeline. “You threw it back in my face the first chance you got, evening after making a promise that is unbreakable!”
A wind starts blows as I stare down at her with cold, unforgiving eyes.
“I made that mistake in my time and the you then was never as bad as the you now. She never killed somepony I care deeply about! I’m not going to make that same mistake again.”
A gut-wrenching scream rings out as flames burst from the ground in a circle around the writhing creature, consuming her, before sinking into the ground, cutting her off abruptly.
Everything is still for several long moments, before I turn to Twilight, smiling as if none of that just happened. “Let’s go get Celestia and then head back to stop Starlight, shall we?”
“Sc-Screwball, what...?” Twilight asks in a horrified whisper.
I glance back at the black circle on the ground. “That? Oh, I just gave her some physical pain to focus on while she spends the rest of eternity in Tartarus. I’ll deal with the hive before we leave. Speaking on which,” I look to the Pegasus filly and point at her, “you!”
She freezes in place, her eyes wide with fear... though, admittedly, everypony is staring at me in fear right now.
“I’ll give you one chance,” I say, stepping towards her, to which Miss Cheerilee and Sparkler hurry to stand between the two of us. “Why are you in this village? Were you a spy for her, or are you one of the few Changelings I’ve met that are happy to live peacefully with ponies?”
That causes confused expressions to go all around, before the filly looks down sadly. She’s enveloped in a flash of green, revealing a Changeling.
At once, everypony is alert, Cheerilee and Sparkler getting the hell away from them.
“I... I just wanted to make some friends,” it said with a light male voice that sounds pretty normal, really. “I’m Thorax. I was never really like other Changelings. I didn’t like having to feed off of others.”
I cock an eyebrow. “And now?”
He frowns, puzzled. “Well, not sure why, but, ever since I got here and was accepted, I haven’t really felt all that hungry, which is weird, because Changelings are meant to always be hungry.”
I nod. “Alright, then. Thorax, you’ll come with us. I think I have an idea.”
He glances to Pharynx’s frozen form. “Um, could you please let my brother go first?”
I glance to the frozen Changeling. I snap my fingers, Pharynx thawing out, gasping for air, before I look back to Thorax. “Now, w’ere going.”
___________________________________________________________
“I sure hope Thorax is ready for all this,” Twilight says as the three of us walk towards the Map. “It won’t be easy.”
“I get the feeling Thorax will be great as the Changelings’ ambassador to Equestria,” I smile, trotting up onto the Map. “Especially with his brother by his side.”
To say our arrival in Canterlot caused an uproar would be an massive understatement. We found Celestia in a pod in the throne room, likely where Cheese Legs would feed on her.
She was definitely confused by Twilight’s being an Alicorn... or, ya know, alive for that matter.
Cadance and Shining Armour had been kept in the caves underneath the city, so the Changelings could feed off their love for each other.
It... it wasn’t a great feeling, seeing them shocked to see Twilight alive, let alone an Alicorn. It wasn’t an easy time with them, nor was it easy to convince them that Twilight and I both needed to leave to get back to our own timeline, that she couldn’t stay.
Myself, they cared about because, with everything so uncertain because of the long rule the Changelings had, power like mine would be a big benefit and safety assurance to all.
Twilight... well, she’s his sister and Cadance her foalsitter and soon-to-be sister-in-law. They cared about her and were grieving the loss of their Twilight.
Misplaced love is what it was; their desperate need to have their Twilight back and having a Twilight that could help take her place... I could see the struggles in their minds easily.
It had taken a couple weeks, but we’d managed to sort pretty much most stuff out. It’s up to the ponies, Zecora and other creatures of Equestria now.
Twilight levitates the scroll out of Spike’s backpack.
“Now, when we come out of the portal, I’ll make a barrier to stop Starlight from trapping us in crystal again,” Twilight goes over the plan.
“Then, if she doesn’t surrender, we fight her, with me stopping her from using any of the spells that could stop us,” I reply, bored. “I know, Twilight. Let’s just do this already. Sooner we stop Starlight, the sooner I can be with my family again.”
She nods, casting the spell. The vortex opens up and we’re lifted into it, the portal closing behind us.