A swirl of buzzing and of words filled the air; attempts at filtering to a single conversation was like switching to a different wavelength—the phasing out of all others to listen to that one chat about how tomatoes should be treated as vegetables and not as fruits.
Then, a green hoof raised.
All became silent, hushing themselves.
In the center, a ray of sunlight shone. Every changeling sat shy of it.
A calm blue-green changeling wearing garb in a midst of clotheless changelings—small, round glasses; a headband and a neckband, and a purple robe—sat in front of a beetle-shaped gong. "Now, Feelings Forum commences." She looked at all the audience surrounding her, sitting on the rough ground that served as the floor. "Who is so kind and so brave as to be the first to speak his or her feelings to the Hive?"
A blue changeling raised his hoof. "Uh, I do."
"Cornicle, I see," the clothed changeling said. She slowly nodded her head, closing her eyes. "Tell us, Cornicle, what bothers you. Or, more positively, what has enlightened you? Or, more casually, what's on your mind?"
"Uh, I just want to get it out of my system," Cornicle said, shuddering, biting his lip as he took a look at the changelings behind him—who were watching him with suspicion. Then, he took a deep breath, walked a few steps forward towards the clothed changeling—smiling at him—and asked, "What do you think about tomatoes?"
"You mean the fruit?"
Cornicle grinned. "Yes. That's all I wanted to hear."
The blue changeling then sat down.
"Your time may have been short," the clothed changeling went on, "but you have made your time meaningful, nonetheless. Like they say, a day of celebration is better than a week of mundaneness."
"Who are the ponies who say that?" another changeling asked, raising his hoof.
"Those who decide to say it and to say it regularly."
"Specifically, who?"
"The ones who are fond of the wisdom found in that saying. Or, those who just want to seem wise. It's either of those two."
Yet another changeling rasied a hoof. "Uh, I also have a question."
"Yes, Gryllo?"
"It's been in the back of my mind for the longest time."
The clothed changeling merely nodded, beckoning Gryllo with a hoof to come closer.
The yellow changeling walked towards the center. "Why don't we have all of us changelings attend Feelings Forum at the same time?"
"It's understandable that they be absent," the clothed changeling answered. "There is no need to condemn them for that act. All that we want for them is that they be good changelings—and, for some of them, the Feelings Forum may not be the best way. For example, where is Thorax in this room?"
"Gone?"
"Not gone," she said, slowly shaking her head. "He is only relaxing, taking a well-needed rest considering that he has had lots to do with the whole Hive lately."
"And, a few more necessities," Discord said as he snapped his claw and a couple of electric fans appeared, directly above Thorax. He narrowly avoided it, dashing his way out of danger.
"What was that for?!" Thorax yelled.
"We wouldn't want you to get a draft," Discord said, fixing his bowtie. "And, by 'we,' I mean the company that you will meet once you get past this door." He walked away, giving the purple and green door full display of itself.
Discord and Thorax stood in the purple, crystal hallway littered with such doors. This one—bigger than the rest.
"Isn't that the Cutie Map room?" Thorax asked. "Are you sure this is a good idea? I hope this is not some kind of heist that's actually sort of a prank." He gulped and faced Discord. "Is it?"
"Not really," Discord said. "It's just guys' night. Except, in order to accommodate you, we've decided to do something a little different." A teddy bear fell from the ceiling and he caught it with his paw. "If you don't mind me saying so, myself."
"I don't know how to say this, Discord," Thorax began, adopting a nervous voice, "but having you as a friend is...interesting."
Discord grinned a mischievous grin. "I know that look. It's the kind of look you want to have when you want to adjust your words a little to not offend poor me!" His eyes grew big as he inched closer to the changeling king. Then, they reverted back to normal. "But, I understand. All rulers have to put on a facade of some sorts to keep up the political semblance of the day. Wouldn't want all-out war, would we?" Then, he clasped his paw and his claw together. "Although, being the spirit of chaos, I wouldn't mind a little...let's say, 'kerfuffle.'"
"Are you going to cause a war?!" Thorax yelled. "Are you crazy?!"
"Thorax, take a chill pill!" Discord patted the changeling king on the head. Then, he dribbled a basketball on his head, then a baseball, then a volleyball, then a golfball with a mustache.
"Uh, Discord?"
"Oh, you were surprised to see this?" Discord said, pulling out the golfball and showing it to Thorax in all its beauty and form—including its mustache. "I've been waiting to show it to somepony. It's always a tiny secret I've kept ever since a few hours ago when I thought about it. I've been thinking about lying to them whenever they see it—always thinking that I just thought about it when the idea had been formed weeks ago!" Then, he snapped his fingers and the door in front of them disappeared, revealing a shocked Spike, Big McIntosh, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie. "But, whatever! Enjoy guys night!"
Thorax looked at the creatures seated at the table. He waved at Spike. Then, he leaned his head in confusion. "Uh, you know Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie aren't guys, right?"
"Honorary participants," Discord said. "Just like how I'm an honorary member of the Cutie Mark Crusaders."
"Wait, but you can't have a cutie—"
"Which is why I added the word 'honorary.'"
Then, Discord skated his way to the table and jumped over to a chair.
Thorax stood there, looking at the varied characters at the crystal table. They were looking back at him—Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie waving at him, Spike really waving at him, Big McIntosh merely giving him a nod, and Discord twirling a ballpen around.
Thorax flew towards an empty seat—right beside Spike's.
"Glad you could make it, Thorax!" Spike said, holding up his claw in the air.
Then, Thorax and Spike high-fived each other.
"So, in case you didn't know, this is Big McIntosh." He indicated a claw towards the big red Earth pony. "We call him Big Mac."
"'McIntosh' sounds intriguing," Thorax said. "Didn't expect that from an Apple."
The Earth pony grinned.
"Of course, you've already met Discord," Spike said, gesturing towards Discord who wasn't paying attention—he continued to twirl with multiple ballpens and a traffic light. "I guess that explains almost everything about him."
Thorax nodded.
"And then, you're wondering why we're here!" Rainbow Dash interrupted.
"Yeah! Good guess, Dashie!" Pinkie said in her usual cheery voice.
Thorax faced them. "Yeah, why?"
"We joined one of their games because Discord made the board game look so real! Have you heard of Ogres & Oubliettes before?"
"No?"
"Which is why I've decided to expand upon guys' night," Discord said, dropping all the ballpens and the traffic light that he was juggling, causing a clattering crash on the floor.
Everyone was now looking at him.
"Why are you looking at me? You've already played lots of other games, not to mention doing other activities as well besides playing board games. However, we haven't tried...'One-Pony Business' yet."
Thorax raised an eyebrow. "What's that?"
"I don't have my own copy," Discord said. "But, that's no worry." He snapped a claw and the board game apppeared—fully boxed—and fell on to the table. An old stallion with a mustache and a top hat was smiling on the cover of the box, followed by the words: "One-Pony Business."
"Are you sure that's a safe way of getting board games?" Thorax asked, his voice becoming nervous.
"As long as we don't tell the proper authorities." He added a snicker. "Besides, who would want to investigate the castle of a Princess, anyway? That would be close to treason. Enough to banish the offender to the moon like a certain other Princess did. Or, encase into stone, but that's another story."
"Wow. You're really snarky."
"I thought you got used to him by now," Spike said, wondering. "You seem to hang out with him more than we do!"
"Don't forget that your perception of time might be different from others'," Discord said, "but, who cares?" He threw his shades on to the floor which exploded into a roll of tissue paper. He teleported it on to his open paw and sneezed while covering his mouth with it. "Let's get this show on the road!"
Big Mac opened the box with his mouth.
Inside was the board and several items—player pieces (which consisted of pony figurines sporting different suits and holding different business-related items like a suitcase for one), different types of cards, stacks of paper play money, miniature houses of two sizes, and two dice. There was also a little booklet.
Discord quickly grabbed the booklet and threw it away, letting it explode into another pile of tissue paper—but, this time, it was colored green. Then, he teleported it on to his open paw and blew his nose with it. "A fancier way to fix yourself, hm?"
The five creatures who were there just looked at Discord with open mouths and widened eyes.
"What?" He pointed his claw at them. "Stop staring at me and let's get to the game!"
"But, how are we going to play it?" Rainbow Dash asked. "You just turned the instructions into tissue paper! Turn it back!"
"Don't be so pushy, Dash," Discord said. "It's not as if it's the end of guys' night, is it? I was thinking that we could learn how to play this game without knowing it all beforehoof."
"And, how are you gonna justify that?"
"Emergent gameplay."
"What?"
"Nevermind!" Discord said. "We're wasting enough time as it is just dilly-dallying and discussing about bringing back the instructions because I'm not. I memorized the rules, which makes the past twenty seconds meaningless."
"Why didn't you tell us that?" Spike complained, bringing a claw on to the table.
"And risk making those twenty seconds a little bland?" Discord said. "Don't call me out on my inconsistencies—I'm not a creature known for keeping things tidy."
Then, he snapped his claw.
The table flashed a bright white light.
The flash disappeared.
It was all prepared on the table—all the stacks of paper money were at each player's part of the table in their appropriate amounts, all the different types of cards were at their correct positions, the board was arranged properly at the middle of the table and somewhat enlarged, all the player pieces were at the starting corner, and all the houses—both big and small—formed a pile at another corner of the board.
"Wow, Discord!" Pinkie exclaimed. "That was so un-Discord of you to do!" Then, she glanced at the pile of houses. "Except for that."
Thorax scanned the table. "So, this is what you guys do during guys' night. You play board games—at least that's the main thing I'm getting off from here."
Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Big Mac, and Spike all grinned. Discord merely smiled as he crossed his arms from where he was standing.
"Uh, why are you all looking at me like that? Do I have something on my face?"
"Well, Thorax," Spike said, slapping Throax on the shoulder, "we don't just play board games." He shot a glance at Discord.
Spike nodded.
Discord nodded back.
He snapped his claw.
Thorax opened his eyes; he was tired and groggy. He rubbed them. "Sunlight? W-where are we?" He stood up. "Where are we Discord?"
He looked around. He gasped.
It was a sprawling urban center. Carriages galloping full speed, skyscrapers towering above them, ponies rushing in their business suits, clankings of bits abundant in the soundscape. Thorax whirled around, taking it all in with suspicion. "Discord?!"
"Don't turn yourself around, Thorax. You're going to make yourself dizzy."
Then, Thorax stopped. He gasped again.
Discord, Spike, Big Mac, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie were there. But, they had business suits of coat and tie; Discord had shades along with his business suit. Briefcases were beside each of them.
"Before you ask, you have one, too," Discord said, pointing a paw at him.
Thorax looked down.
He was wearing a suit with a bowtie.
"Like it? I prefer bowties over the regular ones," Discord said, displaying his black bowtie. Then, he snapped a claw and an orange hat appeared on his head. "Of course, each player must have something different—a unique identifier—so, why not some colored hats?"
He snapped his claw again and different-colored hats appeared on each of their heads. Spike's was green, Big Mac's was red, Rainbow Dash's was rainbow-colored, Pinkie Pie's was pink, and Thorax's was purple.
"Uh, OK," Thorax said, "but what are we doing out here in Manehattan? On the sidewalk? With lots of ponies coming in and out?"
"Here's the thing, Thorax: We're not in Manehattan. Well, not the Manehattan you know. This might as well be Las Pegasus and the only thing I have to change are how many pegasi are here and the surface of the city. Other than that, it's functionally the same."
"Wait, not the Manehattan we know?"
Spike ran up to him. "You see, Thorax, Discord can bring you in the board game!"
Thorax's face contorted. "What?!" He darted his view at random spots. "How are we going to get out of here? Do we have to beat the game to get out?! What if we're not good enough?!"
"Relax, Thorax," Discord said. Then, he placed a paw on his chin. "I like the sound of that, to be honest. 'Relax, Thorax.' 'Thorax, Relax.' 'Relax, Thorax.'"
"Come on, Discord!" Pinkie yelled cheerfully, jumping into the air. "What's the goal of this game and what are the rules?"
Discord grinned. "Now we're talking. So, here's a quick run-down of the rules."
Everyone there huddled together.
"Goal is to be the last one standing. How? Buy colored properties you can see throughout the city. Be sure to be quick—buy one and it's yours for a long time. Anyone who steps near it has to pay you rent. Don't have money? Mortgage your properties away. Still don't have money after all of that? You lose, you get to be put on a bus as you travel around and see the rest of us duke it out like royal leaders—but, not really. Random events will happen from time to time like the Smooze coming to your hotel which will affect your standing amongst the other players. If you go to jail, you must go there and stay there for some time—I'm sure the police here are more than sufficient for that. Free parking is free parking—no questions about that one, since we're not going to be following any house rules other than mine. So, in order to survive, you gotta buy a lot and charge a lot—probably not the only way, but does it matter? You gotta find your own way to victory! Nothing else? OK, good! Run!"
Then, they ran—Rainbow Dash flew.
Thorax looked on. "Oh!"
Thorax flew as he joined in the laughter that ensued as the game of One-Pony Business began in earnest. The smiles on their faces were clear. It was going to be a fun guys' night.