//------------------------------//
// Trotter's Gulch 
// Story: Taming the Wild Horse 
// by SFaccountant 
//------------------------------//

Taming the Wild Horse
a My Little Pony/Ranma 0.5 crossover fanfiction
by SFaccountant


Chapter 3
Trotter's Gulch







Twilight emerged from her bed with a groan and a weary sigh.
Her body ached, but the pain was dull and faded. Despite the extensive application of healing magic, she had spent some time with her wings and a leg in casts, and the joints were still weak. Once she was standing in the middle of her bedroom she began to stretch; legs first, one by one, then each wing. Bones popped with nauseating frequency, and fresh pain bloomed within each appendage. When she was done, however, much of it subsided.
She gave her wings a few experimental flaps, nearly lifting herself off the floor. The pain was almost gone, but Twilight still felt it would be better to stick to the ground for now. She opened her bedroom door with a flicker of magic and then descended to the first floor.


"Spike! Good morning!" Twilight chirped. "Thank you for cooking, as always!"
Spike was carrying a plate of toast to their dining table, and paused briefly to give the alicorn a thumbs-up. The table already boasted several plates of waffles, hot tea, and next to Twilight's setting was a thick book for her to read as she ate.
Twilight sat down and then looked over the title. "Beyond Friendship and Chaos, by Friedrich Neightzsche. Excellent choice, although I've read it already."
"It's pretty hard to find a book in here you haven't read," Spike said with a chuckle while taking his seat.
"I suppose so. Being immobile all day certainly boosted my reading progress!" Twilight agreed.
"Barely. I mean, you got through five a day rather than your usual four?"
"That's the mean average, and you know it!" she retorted sharply. "The mode average is far more representative of how I manage my reading time during my everyday life and other responsibilities! Use that when you make subtle criticisms of my social life!"


Spike ignored her and started eating his waffles. Twilight frowned at him, but quickly let the indignity go. She opened her book and levitated some syrup over her plate, settling back into the routine that had been so brutally interrupted by her brief encounter with Ranma Saotome.
It all seemed so bizarre and dreamlike, even though the actual pain from her capture still hadn't completely faded. The brief chase, the sudden ambush, her short talk with Blood Rite, and the explosion that had nearly put her in a coma... it had all happened so fast, and between her magical imprisonment and waking up in Canterlot's hospital she felt like her memory was spotty.
What exactly happened after her capture? She had recounted the events for Celestia during a formalized debriefing in her hospital room, and for numerous other ponies after that, but her recollection was underwhelming. She remembered conversing with Blood Rite, but the words were fuzzy. This was no doubt related to the massive explosion that had swallowed her prison and knocked her out.
She knew Blood Rite had not been captured by Equestria, but had been told little else besides that. Curiosity gnawed at her, but the young Princess had been reluctant to press for details. She was still embarrassed to have encountered Rite at all, considering that Celestia had specifically warned her to avoid him. Celestia hadn't leveled any accusations or chided her over what had happened, but the elder alicorn certainly knew she didn't have to; Twilight felt guilty enough, and the various fractures and concussions were their own punishment besides.
But Blood Rite was only one piece of the puzzle. He was an enigma that had been deliberately and forcefully obscured by Princess Celestia, and while Twilight was almost desperate to know more about him, her trust in her mentor kept that desire in check. The other big piece, however, she knew more about, and yet he seemed all the more mysterious for it.
Just what had happened to Saotome Ranma?


She dwelled on this for some time, her eyes scanning the pages of her book without really digesting the content. Her breakfast gradually disappeared down her throat, piece by piece. Soon the plate was empty, and Spike took it away. Twilight remained in her seat, levitating one page back after another, her mind occupied elsewhere.
A knock came at the door.


"Rainbow Dash! Applejack! Hello!" Twilight was quite pleased to see two of her friends waiting outside. Applejack was wearing a pair of saddlebags with some papers stuffed in it, while Rainbow Dash was hovering overhead with a solemn expression.
"Hiya, Twi! How ya feelin' this mornin'?" Applejack asked.
"Your wings okay? Are you exercising them every day?" Rainbow Dash added, dipping in through the front entrance to get a closer look.
"My wings are recovering just fine," Twilight said wryly. "But I'm going easy on them for now."
"That's no good, Twi! You've gotta work them out!" Rainbow gave a few hard flaps for emphasis, bounding up higher before dropping back down to a low hover. "Trust me on this one! I've had plenty of wing injuries! You have to put a little strain on them if you want to get back in the air again!"
"The difference being that I'm not in a hurry to get back in the air again," Twilight reminded the racer. "I lived most of my life on the ground, and I'm perfectly happy here for now. But thanks, Rainbow Dash."
Rainbow made an exasperated face while Applejack chuckled. "Well, it's good t'hear yer comin' along. But we ain't just here fer a social visit."
"Oh? What's going on?"
Applejack and Rainbow shared a glance, the farmer looking up over Twilight's head. Rainbow Dash nodded.
"Okay, so, you remember a few weeks ago when you blew up that drifter pony?" Rainbow asked.
"ON ACCIDENT," Twilight said immediately. Then she cleared her throat and backed up a few steps to let Applejack inside. "Anyway, yes, I remember. What about Saotome Ranma?"
"Looks like Mister Sow-toh-may got himself into a spot o' trouble," Applejack said, her tone grim. "Ah don' know if ya had an inklin' of what kinda varmint ya were dealin' with when ya blasted 'im, but seems that this guy's a real bad apple."
"What? What are you talking about?" Twilight asked, frowning.
"Ah was makin' a delivery outta town and happened t'see this thing while droppin' off mah wares. Take a look." She nosed around in her saddlebag for a moment, and then Applejack turned back toward Twilight with a sheet of parchment clenched in her teeth.
Twilight's eyes went wide. "That's... That's him! On a bounty notice?! Dead or alive?! 20,000 bit reward?!" She was about to move to the section of the poster that detailed his crimes, but she couldn't help but notice that the name was different from what she had expected. "Wait, Havoc? Who's 'Havoc?' His name is Saotome!"
"Maybe that's too hard to spell?" Rainbow ventured.
"Or some kinda code name?" Applejack guessed. "I dunno, but I kinda like the name Havoc. Feels appropriate after what the varmint did to mah orchard."
"The dragonspawn wrecked your orchard, not Ranma!" Twilight protested.
"Havoc. His name is Havoc now," Rainbow Dash said, wagging a hoof at the Princess.


Spike poked his head out of the kitchen.


"No, his name is Saotome Ranma," Twilight said firmly. "This has to be some kind of mistake. It says here that he attacked a Princess! He SAVED Princess Luna's life, he didn't attack her! This must have been what he was talking about when he complained about being framed!"
"Wait, really? He was framed? Or is it that there's a real criminal who just looks like him?" Rainbow asked.
"Yes, maybe that's it." Twilight nodded. "It would explain why they have the wrong name, too. This 'Havoc' must be a completely different pony. Probably with some association with Blood Rite, judging by all the treason and rebellion charges. Ranma has nothing to do with that."
"Nah. It's him."
The three mares did a double-take, and then they whirled around. Spike was standing next to the kitchen entrance while drying a plate with a towel.
"What? What do you mean?" Twilight asked, looking halfway between offended and afraid.
"Ranma and Havoc are the same pony," Spike said bluntly. "Trixie came up with a different name for him because she thought his real name was dumb."
"Trixie? What's that annoyin' grifter got t'do with this?" Applejack asked, her brow furrowing.
"He's traveling with Trixie now. They're like an adventuring team or something. I dunno." Spike shrugged.
"Huh. Well, she has a point. His real name IS dumb," Rainbow agreed solemnly.
"It's a foreign name, Rainbow Dash!" Twilight chided. "It's not 'dumb,' it's just different! Don't be insensitive!"
"Yeah, well, Trixie calls him Havoc and the pegasus version Calamity. And then when something goes wrong, they pin the crimes on Havoc and Calamity and pretend that Ranma is a different pony. That's why the authorities don't have his real name, and are confused about who did what." Spike finished drying the plate and briefly re-entered the kitchen to fetch another one.
"Pegasus 'version?' Whaddya mean by 'version?'" Applejack asked, scratching her head.
"He's talking about Saotome's other body," Twilight said, sounding distracted.
"Other... body? What?"
"He has a magic condition."
"The allergy?"
"Okay, so he has MULTIPLE magic conditions. Anyway, he changes from an earth pony stallion to a pegasus mare with exposure to water of varying temperatures." Twilight tilted her head to the side, narrowing her eyes in thought.
"He changes bodies?" Applejack looked suspicious. "We sure this varmint ain't a changeling?"
"He isn't a changeling." Spike returned from the kitchen while drying a water glass. "He can only change into a pegasus, nothing else. And it isn't like a deliberate thing." Spike held up the glass to check it for spots. "He sometimes uses it like a changeling to disguise himself, though. He spends a lot of time trying to avoid arrest."
Twilight slumped onto her rear and started rubbing her head.
"Okay, hold on, I'm confused." Rainbow Dash pointed to Spike. "Level with me, here: is Saotome a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Oh, he's definitely a good guy!" Spike said, satisfied that the glass was clean. "Anything that says he was working for Blood Rite is wrong. Mostly."
"Mostly?!" Applejack asked incredulously.
Spike rolled his eyes. "Well, it's complicated. But Dash asked me to level with you, so there you go: he's a good guy who wants to stop Rite from doing whatever mysterious evil thing it is Rite wants to do." He pointed a claw at Twilight. "He was REALLY upset when he found out you were captured. In fact, I'm like ninety percent sure he was the one who rescued you from Blood Rite and brought you back to Coltson where the Princesses found you. That was why he was hanging out with Swan Song back there; it was part of a big plan to trick her into leading us to you." He stopped and scratched the back of his head. "I'm not COMPLETELY sure how that turned out, though, because I kind of screwed up my part of the plan and got swept up by the Royal Guard. Still, I'm positive that the Princesses didn't rescue you, and I seriously doubt it was Trixie."
Twilight's jaw fell open, and her eye started to twitch.
"Holy hailstones! Then this guy is a hero and he's being hunted like a criminal!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Yeah. I mean... mostly." Spike grimaced. "I'm also pretty sure he did do some of the stuff he's accused of. So, you know... Like I said. Complicated."
Spike turned around to return the glass to the kitchen, only to be suddenly surrounded by a purple aura of magic. The glass slipped from his hand and floated onto the table, while the young dragon was spun around to face Twilight.
"Spike, how do you know all this?!" Twilight demanded.
"I know all this because I was there," Spike deadpanned. "Ranma and Trixie looked after me after you were captured and Princess Luna bolted. Mostly Ranma, since Trixie kept trying to ditch me."
Twilight was stunned speechless for a few seconds. "... And WHY haven't you told me any of this before now?!"
"Because when you were finally discharged from the hospital and came home, you told me you didn't want to talk about Coltson or your getting captured," Spike answered calmly.
Twilight's cheeks darkened, and she winced. The magical aura around Spike broke, and the dragon picked up the clean glass again to return it to the kitchen.


Twilight remained silent for a few seconds, her ears pinned and her face burning while Applejack and Rainbow Dash stared.
"I... did actually say that," Twilight admitted with a slight squeak. "In my defense, I spent all of my last week in the hospital being questioning and interviewed about the whole ordeal even though I hardly remembered anything."
"Ah see," Applejack mumbled. She looked down at the bounty poster and chewed her lip. "Well, Ah guess we know better now. That's an awful shame." She started rolling up the poster to put it back in her saddlebag.
"Wait! We have to do something about this!" Twilight insisted, jumping around. "Saotome is being hunted down and-"
Spike suddenly poked his head back out. "Also, just so you know: Ranma is his given name. He introduces himself backwards, for some reason. Maybe it's a human thing." He went back to the dishes.
"... Yes. Right. Ranma is being hunted down and persecuted for several crimes he didn't commit." Twilight shook her head. "Even if some of these accusations have some truth to them, others are an outright fabrication, and yet others may be misunderstandings taken out of context! We have to contact the authorities and explain!"
"Tried that! They didn't believe me!" Spike shouted.
Twilight deflated instantly. "Oh, for pony's sake..."
"Well, we could try again anyway. Maybe they'd believe it coming from a Princess?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"A Princess with little to no information besides the source they already dismissed," Twilight grumbled. Then she magically levitated the bounty poster into the air again and opened it. "But then again... There's no way some of these charges should be valid. Attacking Princess Luna, at the very least, is ridiculous. She was VERY clear that Ranma saved her from the rebels."
She rolled up the poster in the air, and a determined expression crossed her face. "I have to at least try to help fix this."
"Good luck!" Spike shouted from the kitchen. "I'm tired of having soldiers making fun of me, so I'll stay here this time."
"Yes, fine," Twilight grumbled. "Rainbow, Applejack, can you come with me?"
"Sure thing, sugarcube," Applejack said with a grin. "With mah delivery outta the way, Ah've got most of the day free anyhow."
"Count me in!" Rainbow Dash agreed. "I don't know much about this Ranma guy except that he took on the dragon thing and you blew him up that one time, but if Spike vouches for him that's good enough for me!"
"Thanks, girls! Let's catch the late morning train to Canterlot and check with the dispatch office!" Twilight opened the front door again. "Oh, and... Rainbow, could you... not bring up that explosion thing anymore? Please?"
"Ha! No."







Trixie frowned while she pored over several papers laid out under her forelegs. Her quill hovered in the air nearby, and a small pot of ink sat atop a pillow in order to muffle the vibrations underneath it. A sack of bits sat on the other side of the papers, and were given no such protection; the coins inside quivered and freely clinked together as the wagon's wheels rattled them.
Once again, the magician was looking over her accounts. And once again, she was finding herself deeply concerned about her cash flow.
Which wasn't to say that she didn't have enough money. Far from it; Trixie was firmly in the black and still had a decent emergency reserve of funds, even after she and Ranma had splashed out for new dresses in Fillydelphia. Ranma had completely covered for her regular show earnings with his appropriations from enemies that kept attacking them. He apparently even managed to "rescue" (his word) several dishes from the buffet after the mayor's party had turned into a conflagration, which kept him away from her food stocks for a grand total of two whole meals.
And that was more or less the problem Trixie was considering at the moment. All of her recent funds and her savings from "free supplies" had basically come from Ranma. His penchant for attracting unsympathetic scoundrels with money, combined with his talent for beating them to a pulp, had kept the two of them afloat even while it had prevented Trixie from putting on any shows and making any money herself.
This was a problem. Not just because it was a legally dubious source of income, but because it was an unreliable, inconstant source of income that directly interfered with her primary trade. The more trouble Ranma fought off, the more likely it was that they would be driven out of every given town before she could so much as put up a puppet stage. Hopefully Ranma's new disguise would help with that, but Trixie wasn't expecting miracles; not a single pony in Fillydelphia had successfully identified "Havoc" and they still ended up departing in the middle of the night to evade capture.
Besides that, Trixie was concerned that she was starting to get used to making a living primarily through what she had wryly termed "reverse banditry." She caught herself frowning in disappointment sometimes when bounty hunters didn't have much money on them, and she often thought back to Blood Rite's tower and wondered how much treasure and supplies had been wastefully destroyed because of Swan Song's sudden tantrum. It only really occurred to her when she was budgeting her finances how bizarre it was to think of the detonation of somepony else's home as "lost earnings."
Trixie had a solution, though: if she had her old, larger wagon back, which had a built-in stage and living space, then she could easily and instantly set up a show anywhere at any time. Her stage wagon had been excellent at drawing curious crowds and allowed her to forgo arranging presentations and lodging inside the towns she visited. Not to mention the obvious advantages of storage and interior living space.
The problem was, of course, that such a wagon would be very expensive. As extensively talented as she was, Trixie didn't do carpentry or construction. And while Ranma's fighting was surprisingly lucrative, his eating habits and disruption to her shows made it hard to save. Trixie would need a plan to come up with a lot of money quickly.
"Of course, if it were that easy, Trixie wouldn't be worried about money in the first place," the magician grumbled.
The wagon suddenly stopped. "... Trix?"
"Never mind, Ranma. Trixie was just talking to herself," the unicorn answered.
"Not that! Duck!"


Ranma leapt forward, twisting free of the harness that secured him to the wagon. Trixie heeded the stallion's warning, falling flat and covering her head.
A moment later the heavy THUNK of crossbow bolts striking wood shook the wagon. One bolt missed the side and sailed over Trixie, knocking off her star-patterned hat. Shouting came from the side of the road, and Trixie heard the sound of hooves pounding against the ground.
"Give up, Havoc! Your bounty is ours!"
Trixie peeked up over the side of her wagon. There were several armed ponies charging from the trees, plus a minotaur wielding a battleaxe. She touched a hoof to the gemstone clasp securing her cape, and a pulse of heat washed over her chest. Within the fake casing, the Alchemist's Heart started feeding magical energy through Trixie's natural aura, and her horn's glow shifted from bright pink to fiery crimson.
"Well, what do you know?" the magician sniffed. "More income."







Speedy Snaps heard the bell ring on the front door, and her ears perked up.
"Just a minute, please!" she sang, still facing away from the front counter. She was sorting papers with her wings, clutching one memo after another between her primary feathers before slipping them into place among the greater stack. Once all the papers were in place, she pushed the stack under a large stapler and slammed a hoof down onto the top.
"There!" The bounty office's administrator pushed aside the papers, and then rapidly whirled around. "How can I hellllllp... you?"
Her voice trailed off awkwardly as she immediately recognized the three ponies standing just inside her office. Not that she had ever met them before, but there were few ponies in Canterlot who couldn't recognize the Elements of Harmony. Three of the six mares were currently standing in front of her desk, each of them wearing very serious and generally displeased expressions.
"P-Princess Twilight Sparkle! H-Hi!" Speedy said, suddenly overcome with nervousness. She couldn't imagine why the Element of Magic wanted to see her, but she had a feeling the youngest of the alicorn Princesses wasn't here to collect a bounty. "Is there something I can help you with?"
"Maybe. I have a problem, and I believe the problem originated here," Twilight said evenly. Ranma's bounty poster was rolled up and levitating over her head in a shroud of purple magic, and Rainbow Dash and Applejack flanked her as if they were trying to keep the administrator from escaping the room.
Speedy glanced up to the paper in the grip of Twilight's telekinesis. "Is that a bounty poster?" She guessed.
"Yes, it is. And I believe it's wrong."
Speedy nodded solemnly. "I see. It's not unheard of for ponies to create fake bounty posters in order to get hunters to target innocent ponies. Let me see it."
"Here." Twilight moved the poster to the desk, and then unrolled it with her magic. "I don't have any reason to believe this isn't official, but it IS incorrect."
Speedy Snaps recognized the poster immediately, and she clicked her tongue. "Ah! I see the problem. This poster is old. Thanks for bringing it in; the guard posts don't always update them regularly when we get new information and issue replacements."
"Ah ha! I knew it!" Twilight sounded triumphant for a moment, and then looked concerned. "But he still has a bounty on his head?"
"Well, of course." Speedy turned the poster around to face her, and then took up her quill between her teeth.
"Spike did say he wasn't completely innocent," Applejack reminded Twilight.
"Let's see what he's still accused of and then work from there," Rainbow Dash suggested.
Speedy dipped her quill in the ink pot at the edge of her desk.
Then she drew an extra zero onto the reward total.
Then she crossed out the "or alive" portion of "dead or alive."
Then she turned it back around and pushed the poster back to Twilight. "There you go. You can put it back up now, or keep it for your own use."
Twilight's jaw fell slack. Rainbow Dash sucked in a breath through her teeth. Applejack whistled.
"200,000 bits! That's some kinda payday, all right!" the farmer mused aloud.
"The-Thi-Tha-" Twilight shook her head to clear it, and then stepped closer to the desk. "No! This is still wrong! This is all a terrible mistake!"
Speedy Snaps arched an eyebrow. "Well, technically I should have added all the other crimes he did at the bottom; that poster only has about a third of the current standing charges against him. But that would take too long, and the bounty hunters don't really care about that part anyway."
"I didn't know bounties that didn't accept live prisoners was a thing," Rainbow mumbled, looking fairly perturbed.
"Neither did I, actually!" Speedy chuckled. "The last few weeks have been full of surprises!"
"Well, hay, now I kinda wanna know what the other crimes were," Applejack said. "What kinda bedlam do ya gotta cause to get a price like that on yer head?"
"You have to attack an Equestrian Princess, assist in the abduction of a DIFFERENT Equestrian Princess, and somewhere along the way beat up and rob an Equestrian General," Speedy chuckled. "As an aside, I'm glad you escaped from the rebels, Princess. Close one!"
"But that's not true!" Twilight blurted. "He didn't do any of those things!"
Speedy Snaps recoiled in surprise. "He didn't beat up General Firebrand?"
"No! He..." Twilight's jaw open and closed wordlessly for a moment, and then she released a frustrated sigh. "Well, I don't actually know about that one. Maybe! But he never attacked Princess Luna and he definitely didn't assist in my capture!"
"Huh... Really?" Speedy rubbed her chin thoughtfully.
"I mean, if you want to get ABSOLUTELY TECHNICAL, he did attack Princess Luna," Twilight continued. "But it was a duel, so it absolutely shouldn't count as a case of assault!"
Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Ain't duels illegal too?"
"Yes. But she declared it, so..." Twilight trailed off. "... So that might... affect the judgment? I'm not actually familiar with this area of law."
"I am, and it's actually NOT okay to hit a Princess even if she invites you to do it somehow," Speedy interjected with a shrug. "But really, the details would be for the magistrate and barrister to hash out. You know, assuming the hunters delivered the suspect and not the suspect's corpse." She stopped and scrawled down some notes on a piece of paper. "Now, you say that he didn't assist in your capture?"
"He didn't. That I am absolutely sure of. One-hundred percent," the purple mare said firmly.
"Okay. I'll probably need a sta-"
"I mean, he didn't do it DELIBERATELY," Twilight continued. "Arguably you could say that his duel with Princess Luna DID draw all of us apart at a critical-"
Rainbow Dash suddenly slapped her hoof around Twilight's mouth, sealing it closed. "Don't mind her, she babbles sometimes. We'd like to stick with 'One-hundred percent,' please."
Speedy Snaps took a few more notes, and then dropped the quill from her mouth with a sigh. "Look, Princess, I'm not sure what exactly you're trying to accomplish here, but from the sound of things this stallion has a lot to answer for. I can make a case that we should allow for his live capture again, but I'm not seeing much scope for reducing his charges on your say-so."
Twilight's ears drooped in disappointment. Applejack shook her head sadly.
Rainbow Dash scowled. "Ponyfeathers! I figured a Princess could just march in here, tell you to drop the charges, and you'd have to do it."
"Rainbow! That is NOT how being a Princess works!" Twilight grumbled.
"Actually, yes, that's exactly how it works," Speedy corrected. The other three mares stumbled in surprise. "Or, rather, that's how it WOULD work... but this bounty initially came from Princess Luna. Princess seniority is a thing, I'm afraid."
"It IS?" Applejack asked, perplexed.
"I'm learning so much today," Rainbow Dash mumbled.
Twilight shook her head. "That means Princess Luna didn't lift the bounty even after she found out about it! He told her back before their fight! I can't believe everypony was just so panicked by my capture that they completely ignored this!" She felt like bashing her head against a wall. "How did this even happen? The only time he ever hurt her was when SHE started a fight with HIM!"
"Well, that's kind of a funny story, actually," Speedy chuckled. "Initially, he had a minimal bounty seeking live capture just for questioning. That's the bounty that came directly from Princess Luna. Then the Lunar Guard pinned the Princess Assault charges to him; oddly enough, without any sort of statement from the Princesses themselves. After a few days in distribution, suddenly all sorts of crimes started coming in to be added to his suspect profile. We've had to start attaching secondary posters to the main posters just so we can list everything! Like I said, I think it really doesn't matter since the hunters don't care, but that's standard procedure..."
"This is hopeless," Twilight groaned. "This pony doesn't deserve this! He's lost and confused, and he's been attacked constantly since he set foot in Equestria!"
"None of that necessarily makes the criminal charges against him untrue or invalid," Speedy pointed out gingerly.
Rainbow Dash tilted her head to the side, and then suddenly brightened. "Well, nothing for it, then! C'mon, let's go." She suddenly pushed Twilight toward the exit, waving her wing toward the administrator. "Thanks for your help! See you later!"
"Wait! Rainbow! We still might-" Twilight started to protest as she stumbled out the door, but Rainbow shushed her before successfully shoving her outside.
Applejack looked suspicious, but gave a brief nod to Speedy Snaps before she too exited the building. The farmer caught the door with her back leg and closed it firmly on her way out.


"Rainbow Dash, what are you doing?" Twilight asked. "We still might be able to help! If we can get a magistrate to accept that there may be extenuating circumstances-"
"Twi, you're thinking about this the wrong way," Rainbow snickered. "The law thinks Ranma is bad. But we KNOW Ranma is good! All these silly posters and lawyers are just muddling the issue!"
"What good does knowin' that do if we can't get the lawpone off his case?" Applejack drawled.
"Yes! Exactly!" Twilight agreed.
"Because a Princess's word is worth more than a lawpone's!" Rainbow said.
"But it's Twi's word against Luna's," Applejack pointed out. "Fer some reason..."
"Okay, wait... I think I see Dash's point." Twilight nodded thoughtfully. "If we speak to Luna, we can get her involved and she can dismiss the charges personally! The ones related to harming me and her, at least!"
"Yeah, we could, but that would take all day. She's not even up right now," Rainbow Dash scoffed. "You need to think bigger. 'Princess seniority' is a thing, remember?"
"You mean... ask Princess Celestia to dispute the charges?"
"Forget 'dispute.' Tell Princess Celestia this guy saved your flank and he's been wrongfully accused, so he should get a full pardon. Just wipe the slate clean!" the pegasus grinned, floating over the other mares and swiping her leg sharply to the side.
"What about all the shady stuff he mighta actually done?" Applejack asked, narrowing her eyes.
"Who cares? He saved Twilight's life!" Rainbow countered.
"Probably," the farmer corrected.
"VERY probably! Ninety percent probably!"
"Ya know Ah ain't callin' Spike a liar, but Ah dunno about this, RD," Applejack said sourly, sitting down. "The only time Ah met Havoc was after he knocked over a dozen apple trees, and just a'fore he led a dragonspawn into my orchard to tear it up. He don't seem like no knight in shining barding t'me."
"But that's exactly the point!" Twilight interjected, setting her jaw. "From your perspective, it seemed like he just tore through your property like a whirlwind! Especially the part where he literally tore through your property with a whirlwind. But he wasn't really to blame for any of that! My spell is what ultimately sent him into your orchard, which is why the dragonspawn was drawn there. And because I screwed up getting him to safety, he had no choice but to fight it using any means necessary!"
The alicorn shook her head. "Rainbow Dash is right. Until we have reliable information to the contrary, we should presume innocence and plead his case on that basis! Let's go see the Princess."
"YES! Loyalty beats Honesty once again!" Rainbow Dash cheered, pumping a foreleg into the air. Applejack scowled up at her, and Twilight winced. "Let's go get that pardon!"







"... Forty-three, forty-four, and that makes forty-five!"
One coin after another dropped into a small sack of golden bits, arcing over the side of the wagon on trails of pink magic. Trixie counted each one, and then a floating quill briefly noted the total amount on the accounting notes she had been perusing before she had been attacked.
The unicorn pouted. "Is that all? This is barely ration money! And none of you even look like you have any gear worth pawning! This is just embarrassing!"
Trixie turned toward a line of six ponies lying on the ground behind her. Every one of them was injured to one degree or another, sporting an array of black eyes, scorched fur, chipped teeth, and swollen lumps on the head. Two of them were simply unconscious, and had been laid down next to the others out of mere convenience. Those that weren't comatose quivered in pain and terror, staring up at the unicorn mare like one would regard a bloodthirsty chimera or enraged dragon.
"What were you idiots thinking? Did you seriously think scrubs like yourselves could take Trixie down so easily? Do you have any idea who we are?!" Trixie shouted, glaring down at the brutalized bounty hunters.
One of the mares sniffled fearfully, and then pointed a trembling hoof off to the side. "We... We, uh... We know who HE is..."
Some distance away from the other ponies, Ranma was inspecting the unconscious minotaur that apparently acted as the bounty hunting squad's shock trooper. The beast's face had been mashed against a tree, and one of his horns was driven deeply enough into the trunk that it held the rest of his body up while Ranma patted down his pockets.
Trixie scowled. "Of course, you're here for the big payout. Trixie supposes that's to be expected, and since Trixie has no bounty - being a loyal and law-abiding citizen of Equestria - you wouldn't recognize just how far in over your heads you were."
One of the stallions tilted his head to the side. "What's a loyal and law-abiding citizen doing traveling with the biggest single criminal bounty in Equestria?"
Trixie remained silent as her horn flashed. The nearby pile of weapons that had been taken from the hunters trembled, and a short sword floated into the air.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I take it back! Forget I said anything!" the stallion wailed, clamping his hooves over his eyes and breaking down into sobs. "Please, don't kill me! I have nothing left after this! Just leave me with my life, I'm begging you!"
"Oh, stop your whining," Trixie snapped. The stallion silenced himself with a squeak. "Trixie isn't going to kill any of you."
The blade hovered in front of her at nose level, and Trixie narrowed her eyes. The sword was cheap iron, poorly tempered, and had chips and rust on its edge. It was a weapon more appropriate for a rogue than a bounty hunter, probably scavenged from a junk pile or a battlefield. The crossbows were in slightly better condition, but had clearly seen heavy use; and judging by the poor aim and reloading proficiency of the ponies in front of Trixie, the heavy use hadn't come from them.
Their cutie marks confirmed Trixie's suspicions. There were flowers, bread, and one even had an iron ingot on their rear, but not a one featured a weapon, shackles, or anything that brought to mind the violent trade of subduing criminals for cash rewards.
"You idiots aren't even bounty hunters, are you?" Trixie asked.
The mare pursed her lips. "Well... we came here with the express purpose of capturing a pony for the goal of redeeming a bounty, so technic-"
The flat of the blade Trixie was levitating smacked against her head, and she yelped in pain before she started crying again.
"Okay! No! We're not really bounty hunters! I'm sorry! Please don't hit me anymore!" the mare wailed, trying to cover her head with her forelegs.
"Trixie thought so. What's a bunch of tradesponies doing trying to ambush bounties? Was the payout just so big that you couldn't resist?" The blade slowly spun in the air as she interrogated the defeated equines, wavering over their heads on a bed of glittering pink.
"N-No, it's not that..."
"Well, it's KIND of like that, in that this bounty was one of the only two that was big enough and had a target that was nearby," another pony admitted. "We're trying to raise money to move away, and this is the only thing we hadn't tried. We had no choice!"
"No choice," Trixie drawled. The sword stopped spinning. "Really."
The ponies before her started whimpering in terror.
"It's the bandits! There's this bandit gang that's been plaguing all the towns in this region! That's why we're doing this!" one of them howled.
"The bandit boss Morning Star practically runs the towns around here by now! They trot through whenever they want and take nearly everything, barely leaving enough for us to survive!"
"They leave our towns destitute, so we have nothing to spare for taxes or protection! Any time anypony tries to hire a fighter or guard or mount any other kind of resistance, the bandits find out and they all swarm the village and... well... make an example of them."
"We can't take it anymore! We want to abandon the town, but we needed some money for the trip and starting over somewhere else! This bounty thing seemed like the only way for us to get lots of money all at once without facing the bandits!"
Ranma approached the group with a small coin sack sitting on his back. "This bandit boss wouldn't happen to be your mayor, would he?" The ponies looked up at him, perplexed.
"No, of course not. Although... for all intents and purposes Morning Star may as well be."
"Our ACTUAL mayor pretty much works for Morning Star. He makes excuses to Canterlot for why the town can't pay taxes and downplays the bandit problem, and Morning Star makes sure the thieves leave his house alone. It's probably the same with all the royal officials around here. Anypony who steps out of line disappears. And not quietly."
"Incidentally, the other bounty we were talking about is for Morning Star," sighed another of the amateur hunters. "But obviously, if we could take on the bandits, we would do so whether or not there was a bounty reward. That minotaur over there - an actual bounty hunter, apparently - got word that a pony fitting Havoc's description was headed this way, and we figured that we could overwhelm you with sheer numbers."
"Seven isn't a very impressive number," Ranma said blithely.
"It seemed a lot more impressive before you lodged the minotaur's head into the tree."
Trixie suddenly stabbed the floating blade into the ground, causing the injured equines to flinch back. "This is terrible!" the magician shouted, her expression enraged.
Ranma nodded solemnly. "Yeah, they look like they've had it pretty bad."
"They've had it SO bad that they barely have enough money to survive on! Which means nobody is going to shell out for a magic show!" Trixie growled. "And you're telling Trixie that this entire REGION is like that? Half a dozen villages with barely a bit to spare between them!? And we came all this way!"
A drop of sweat crawled down Ranma's head. "Uh... yeah. I guess that's a problem too."
"It's more than just a problem! Trixie was heading to this area specifically because of their isolation and poor guard presence! If we turn around we'll be heading straight into the soldiers that are looking for us and all the REAL bounty hunters sniffing around for their big score!" Trixie raged. "But if we press on it could take more than a week before we're out of the valley! And the towns and their citizens are completely destitute?! We'll be lucky enough to be able to be able to scrape together enough supplies for the trip, never mind earn any money!"
"Um... speaking of destitute villagers on their last legs," one of the amateur hunters said cautiously, "the money and weapons you took are literally all we have left aside from bandit-ravaged real estate. Any chance you could... you know... not take it from us?"
Ranma heard a snapping noise, and he sucked in some air through his teeth.
"You... dirty, incompetent, USELESS dregs!" Trixie snarled, her eyes flashing and her horn blazing with power.
Pink magic swarmed over the pile of weapons, and several of the crossbows suddenly jumped into the air and swiveled around to face the prostate ponies. The ones that were conscious yelped and squeezed together in a desperate, terrified embrace.
"A few minutes ago you would have happily taken Trixie's life without a thought, and now, after you've lost, you ask Trixie to spare your POCKETBOOKS?!" the magician snarled. "You should be thanking Trixie for letting you off with a few measely bruises after daring to pick a fight with us! Do you idiots have any idea how easily we could bury you?!"
"Whoa! Hey! Easy, Trix!" Ranma jumped in front of the enraged unicorn, pushing her back and away from the injured ponies. "It's fine! Everything's fine now!"
"It's NOT fine, you dunderhead! Weren't you listening?!" she raged.
Once Ranma was satisfied that Trixie's anger had been diverted to himself, he quickly turned to the would-be bounty hunters. "Take your friends and get out of here! Now!"
The equine villagers scrambled to their hooves, and quickly went about lifting their unconscious comrades onto their backs to carry them. Within seconds they were galloping away, having left their bounty target - and their minotaur "leader" - behind in the dust.


Trixie glared at Ranma, silently fuming. The martial artist stared back at her, braced to receive whatever vented abuse the unicorn had in store for him.
Instead, Trixie released her levitation magic. The weapons dropped back into their pile, and she sighed irritably. Then she turned around and trudged back to the wagon.
Ranma was reasonably surprised to be spared any more complaints or insults. Naturally, his first instinct was to immediately press his luck. "So, what's the plan from here on out?"
Trixie groaned while she climbed up into the wagon bed. "Give Trixie a few minutes, will you? Trixie still hasn't fully absorbed the failure of Trixie's previous plan." She slumped onto the bed of blankets, pillows, and grain sacks in the middle of her other supplies. "Ugh... Trixie will have to consult the maps. There... There might be a shortcut through the area, or... or something."
Ranma started heading to the front of the wagon again, but he hesitated. "... Trix? Are you okay? You're taking this kind of hard. Why does it matter so much if we lose a week or so?"
"Trixie was HOPING to get a head start on saving some money," the magician growled, her ears pinning back against her head. "That would have been hard enough between your eating habits and Trixie being driven out of every town before so much as setting up a puppet show. But now Trixie knows there's hardly a spare bit between here and Creepy Crags! Hay, even if we get attacked by more desperate villagers, the dopes barely have any pocket change for you to take."
Ranma thought it was somewhat unfair for Trixie to speak as if he alone had looted their defeated enemies; he may have come up with the idea between the two of them, but Trixie had taken to the enterprise with fervor and poorly-disguised glee. More to the point, all such loot went directly to Trixie's cash stores via some unspoken and questionable agreement. For all intents and purposes Ranma didn't own a single bit.
He put that objection aside, however, when he saw how despondent Trixie looked. She had been in surprisingly high spirits since Fillydelphia, despite them being attacked and having to leave the city in a hurry as usual. And while she was normally way more concerned about money than Ranma thought was reasonable, she didn't usually let sudden losses bring her down like this.
"Why do you need money all of a sudden? Are we running out?"
Trixie's eyes narrowed at him. There was just a hint of guilt in the stallion's voice.
"... No, although that could change easily enough. What Trixie wanted to do was buy a new wagon."
"Why? Is something wrong with this wagon? Do we need to fix it?"
Trixie shook her head and pushed herself up into a seated position. "It's not that. Trixie used to have a much larger traveling stage wagon. It could be unfolded into a platform from which Trixie could put on a show whenever and wherever she wanted, and had proper living space so Trixie didn't have to sleep on the rocks every night." She sighed wearily. "Such a thing isn't cheap, however, and Trixie doesn't do payment plans. We probably need a good four or five thousand bits to spare for anything of passable quality, and there obviously isn't any money like THAT anywhere in this stupid valley!"
Ranma sat down and rubbed a hoof against his chin. "Well, there's ONE place, obviously. But aside from that, yeah, I guess we'd be lucky just to keep up our food stocks."
Trixie quirked an eyebrow. "One place? What one place?"
"The bandit gang. That's where all the villages' money is headed, isn't it?"
Trixie recoiled. "OHHH NO. We're absolutely NOT getting involved in this bandit problem!"
"I didn't say we should!" Ranma protested.
"But you're thinking about it!" the unicorn accused.
"Well... sure I am!" Ranma admitted. "I mean, you heard the villagers! This Morning Star jerk is keeping the entire region under his thumb!"
"Under his what?"
"That... It's... Never mind!" Ranma rolled his eyes. "Look at it this way, Trix: we need money. The bandits have money. The villagers want the bandits gone. We want the villagers to not try to kill me for cash. It's win-win!"
"Unless Trixie ends up with a stray arrow or dagger in her throat, in which case Trixie definitely LOSES," the magician snapped. "This isn't like fleeing the Equestrian guards, Ranma. Guards have no reason to bother Trixie. You DO remember what happened the last time we encountered a mob of criminals, right?"
Ranma winced. "Well... you got captured and held at knifepoint. Yeah, that was bad. But I'll do better this time! I promise! I won't let them hurt you! Heck, you don't even have to come along! I'll sneak into their base and knock 'em silly on my own!"
"Ah, of course. Trixie will just stay behind in some bandit-infested, desperately impoverished town with her cart full of supplies and bits and no bodyguard. There's no way THAT could end poorly," the magician drawled.
Ranma's ears flipped down. "Oh. Right. So... I guess you should come with me, huh?"
"OR... we can rush through the valley as quickly as possible while minding our own business," Trixie said firmly. "If any bandits mess with us, you feel free to knock them silly, but Trixie would like to limit her death-defying adventures to those that involve the potential destruction of the Equestrian state."
Ranma chewed his lip anxiously. "Maybe there's some other place you can hide out? Some place safe? Or you could-"
"Ranma, what is this about? Why do you WANT to fight these brigands?" Trixie asked, exasperated. "Trixie hasn't seen you chomping at the bit for a fight like this since we lost track of Blood Rite. Trixie knows it isn't because you haven't had enough practice banging skulls around lately, so what is it?"
"Well, it's just... seeing those villager ponies all beaten down like that, whimpering in fear and begging us for their money back..." Ranma hung his head miserably, his ears flipping down. "I just... I just feel sorry for them, you know?"
Trixie stared. "...... You DO remember you're the one who beat them, right?"
"Well, yeah. But it was in self defense! Plus defense of you!"
"Exactly!" Trixie snapped. "These ponies tried to kill us! They would have stabbed you and kicked you over to the authorities without a second thought! They MIGHT have hesitated before slaying Trixie, since Trixie doesn't have a price on her head, but Trixie seriously doubts that first crossbow volley was entirely aimed at you! They probably figured Trixie was a criminal for being around you, so they'd simply kill Trixie as well and take the wagon! If they even bothered to think that far ahead! They're hardly any better than the bandits!"
"And I knocked them silly for that," Ranma said firmly. "But come on! They barely put up a fight! They were already half-starved and exhausted, and now they're penniless and unarmed, too!"
"They. Tried. To. MURDER. Us," Trixie said slowly through clenched teeth.
"If I held a grudge against everyone who ever tried to kill me, I'd hate almost everybody," Ranma scoffed. "So what? It wasn't personal, and they know better now. Let it go."
"Trixie DID let it go! But now you want to HELP them, too?!"
"Yes! But NOT for free!"
"Yes, for free! If Trixie went along with this, then Trixie would lay claim to any treasure we find, and you know it! So you are absolutely helping the ponies who attacked us for free!"
"Huh... Well, okay. You have a point there. I don't really have a problem with that, though."
Trixie slapped a hoof against her face. "WHY?! Why are you like this?! What is it about pathetic and undeserving wretches that suddenly draws your moral compass? One second you're bashing agitated musicians into the pavement or kicking around Equestrian bucking Princesses without a problem, and the next you're coddling dragon children and racing off to rescue third-rate hitponies!"
Ranma puffed himself up, holding his head high again. "It's a martial artist's duty to protect the weak."
"It's a BODYGUARD'S duty to protect the employer," Trixie countered.
"Yeah, I know. I'm trying to square this thing, but you could really meet me halfway on this, Trix."
"RRRRRRRRRRGH!" Trixie made a frustrated noise and reared up in her wagon, kicking the air as if it had offended her. Ranma recoiled slightly, surprised by the bitterness of her resistance, but waited patiently for a more eloquent objection.
Eventually Trixie fell back down, and the unicorn seethed quietly for several seconds while suppressing a string of curses. Then her head snapped toward Ranma, and her eyes narrowed to slits.
"Okay, Ranma. Before Trixie makes a decision on this, Trixie has a question for you," she growled.
"Yes, I do want to eat lunch before I attack the bandits," Ranma replied solemnly.
"THAT IS NOT THE QUESTION!" Trixie snapped. She took a deep breath, and then continued. "Do you SERIOUSLY think this is going to be as simple as you say it will be?"
Ranma frowned.
"I know this isn't your strong point, but actually stop and THINK about what you want to do. Now try to imagine your actions leading to some other result - ANY other result! - than the one you intend." Trixie leaned over the side of her wagon, glaring down at the martial artist. "Consider unexpected interference. Consider abnormally strong resistance. Consider random chance, for Starswirl's sake!" She jabbed a hoof toward the cursed stallion. "Consider that EVERY SINGLE TIME you've intervened or started a fight on this world, no matter what your intentions, it's come right around to bite you in the flank! Consider that maybe, JUST MAYBE, scattering some bandits won't be enough to turn Equestria's most wanted 'rebel' into a hero lauded by these hapless villagers! Consider that Trixie's every instinct and decision since we've met has been thoroughly vindicated, and that your most successful plan ever was sneaking us into a dinner party and waiting for Trixie to leave before setting it all on fire!"
She sat up straight again, her furious gaze still locked onto the stallion's. "Think on that for a few seconds, Ranma. Then tell Trixie whether you still want to charge headlong into a bandit bastion for that dirty mob of pony thugs."
Ranma hung his head again, staring at the ground. His brow furrowed, and his eyes fixed on a single point; a sure sign he was thinking hard, although Trixie had seen the expression few times since they'd met.
Seconds stretched into minutes.


The pigtailed pony finally looked back up at Trixie. "I want to go beat up the bandits. I want to help the townsponies and help you get enough money for the wagon. And I want you to come with me."
Trixie made an exasperated expression. Before she could say anything, however, Ranma continued.
"But I don't want you to come along because I think you'll be safer attacking the bandits than staying on your own for a few hours," the martial artist said, his expression unusually serious. "Trix, you can handle being alone. You survived just fine on your own before I came along, and as long as they couldn't get the jump on you somehow, I know you could handle a few thieves. You'd be fine without me. But..." He trailed off and gnawed on his lip for a few seconds. "I'm... not totally sure I could take on the bandits by myself."
Trixie blinked. Repeatedly.
"Say what? YOU think this Morning Star goon might be a match for you?" Trixie couldn't help but giggle at the idea.
Ranma's ears flipped down, and he sighed. "It's not that... not really. I'm sure I could take on any critter in this weirdo fantasy world in a straight fight. Easy! But... well..." He shook his head. "You asked me to think about all the things that could go wrong, and then I remembered that magic is more common than clothing on this stupid planet, and that literally any spell has a chance of blowing me up or doing some other crazy thing that could cripple me in the middle of a fight. And then there are all sorts of other things about this world that seem insane to me but perfectly normal to you, like solid clouds, cats being combined with other, less terrifying animals, and horses towing the sun or whatever that's about."
He straightened and cleared his throat, looking away from the magician. "So... yeah. I'd feel a lot better if you were with me while attacking the bandits. Not because I think you'll die the moment I'm not around, but because I know I can trust you to back me up. You're smarter than me, you know way more about this world and its weird animal-people, and you're really good in a pinch. I don't know if I can do it without you."
Trixie remained silent, trying and failing to maintain an annoyed, stoic expression. She was experiencing that weird feeling again; the one where she was overcome with intense bliss and radiating warmth from her chest that threatened to smother her stubborn indignation. She really, really liked this feeling, and it was starting to concern her how Ranma kept managing to provoke it whenever he needed her to agree with him.
She couldn't quite keep her goofy grin off her face, but she turned her head away so that at least it was less obvious as she replied. "As if Trixie could just let you run off on your own anyway. Trixie would bet bits to bon bons you'd get turned around somehow and end up razing one of these poor, tortured villages to the ground." She coughed into her hoof, and then laid down. "Very well, then. If you insist on bashing your head against the Heroism Wall yet again, Trixie may as well accompany you. Besides, if Trixie can say anything good about your misadventures, they DO tend to be surprisingly lucrative. Maybe this can be Trixie's big break after all!"
"Yeah! I don't know what this Morning Star guy's bounty is, but it's gotta be pretty close to mine if we were the only payouts big enough to help those villagers, right?" Ranma cheerfully jumped to the front of the wagon and started hooking himself up to the harness again.
"You're... planning on redeeming the bounty?" Trixie asked hesitantly.
"Yeah! It's gotta be enough for your wagon, right?"
"Do you know how one redeems a bounty?" Trixie drawled. "Or what the likely response is when the 'bounty hunter' is a bounty target themselves?"
Ranma halted. "Oh. Oh, right. So... I guess you'd have to do it?"
"Trixie would rather not volunteer to try explain to Canterlot soldiers how she defeated a renowned bandit king. As lovely a tale as it would be, it wouldn't take much investigation to figure out you were involved." She pressed a hoof to her chin. "Instead... we should hand this dope over to the villagers, and let THEM deal with redeeming the bounty reward. We'll take our own reward from the bandit's loot."
Ranma frowned. "Doesn't that stuff belong to the villagers, though?"
"Let's consider it Trixie's service fee for being dragged into this insanity after the miserable mules attacked us," the magician sniffed. "Now, then; we need the location of their base. Head toward the nearest town, Havoc! It seems we're in the vigilante business now!"







"...... So, hold on... I have questions. Many questions..."
Princess Celestia sat in the corner of her study, a pair of gold-rimmed glasses perched upon her muzzle. Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack sat in the middle of the room while they made their case to the Princess of the Sun, although Twilight was already visibly nervous.
"We may be right short of answers, Princess," Applejack said with a sigh. "We're mostly piecin' this together from what Spike told us, but he was only with this feller fer a single night."
"Yeah, but he was SUPER sure that Ranma is actually cool!" Rainbow Dash added. "So that makes this whole bounty thing really UNcool. Can you nix it?"
Celestia frowned, looking over the poster that had been laid across her desk. "... You said Ranma. This bounty is for a stallion named Havoc. I was under the impression - as was Luna - that those are two very different ponies, despite their appearance."
Twilight laughed nervously. Very nervously, in fact. "Yes, well! That's... a bit complicated. Uh..."
"It ain't complicated at all," Applejack interjected. "There ain't no Havoc. That's just a name he goes by 'cuz his real name is all fancy."
Twilight's eye twitched.
"And he might have used that name to push some crimes onto a fake identity," Rainbow Dash added, rolling her eyes. "But we're pretty sure the original charges were a bunch of hay anyhow, so whatever."
"I'm afraid Havoc's record is more... serious than that, Rainbow Dash," Celestia murmured grimly. "He was seen aiding the rebel Swan Song directly, and fighting Equestrian soldiers."
"Okay, yeah, but that was a misunderstanding," the pegasus said breezily.
"He beat General Firebrand insensate, and then stole his prized magical artifact."
"Misunderstanding," Rainbow repeated nonchalantly.
Celestia grimaced. "That's a lot to misunderstand, Rainbow Dash."
"Okay, so we can't deny that he's fought against Equestrian guards and soldiers," Twilight admitted, "but he's done so largely because he's been wrongfully hounded by the law ever since he met Princess Luna! And he only appeared to help Blood Rite in order to trick them and save me!" She paused. "Or... at least, that's what Spike says. But I believe him! Don't you?"
Celestia didn't reply. She stared silently at the bounty poster, as if it were a puzzle to be deciphered.
"Hey, on that note, I gotta question mahself," Applejack added. "Spike thinks Ranma saved Twi. We dunno what happened, 'cept that Twi ended up outside Coltson lookin' like an apple what been run through a cider press. How'd she get there? Do ya know?"
Celestia's eyes narrowed, although she was still staring at the poster rather than the mares petitioning her. "We do. More or less. Spike is correct."
The other ponies recoiled in surprise.
"He is? About which part?" Twilight asked frantically.
"As far as I can tell, about everything," the white Princess replied. "I have no reason to doubt a thing he's said, and what you've told me fills many holes in my knowledge of Havoc... of Ranma's exploits. In the forest outside Coltson, he emerged from Rite's portal with you, Twilight, on his back. He immediately surrendered you to us, but then fled before he could be properly debriefed. As he was still maintaining the fiction that he and Havoc were different ponies, he no doubt feared he would be found out and forced to answer for the charges made against him." She furrowed her brow. "There was also... somepony else there with him, if I recall correctly. She was... blue, I think."
Rainbow Dash quickly chortled into her hooves, trying to stifle laughter.
"In any case, there is little doubt in my mind that Ranma Saotome saved you from Blood Rite, and almost certainly foiled Rite's immediate plans against Equestria."
"Th-Then you'll pardon him? You'll nullify the bounty?" Twilight asked, her eyes growing wide.
"I'll have the charges properly revised," Celestia said, levitating the poster up in front of her. "And I'll certainly fix THIS nonsense." She drew a wingtip under the "Dead or alive" part of the poster that had the second and third words crossed out. "The very idea that we would not accept live bounties is despicable, and I thank you for bringing it to my attention. We want Ranma Saotome very much alive."
Silence dominated the study for several seconds.
"... That... uh... doesn't sound like a pardon," Rainbow Dash mumbled uneasily.
"It is not," Celestia sighed. "I must deny that request."
"What? But you just said that he saved Twi's life!" the pegasus protested. "That has to be worth more than some soldier's magic thingy!"
"It's worth far more. More than I could ever repay, in fact," Princess Celestia said grimly. "Were he to come before me and explain himself, I would be quite inclined to grant a full pardon. But I'm afraid your vouching for him is not sufficient."
She levitated a quill from her desk and started crossing things out and making notes on the poster. "While I personally consider Twilight's life and safety of inestimable value, I cannot treat the damage and grief Mister Saotome may have caused to other ponies so callously. Ranma has allegedly committed crimes that have nothing to do with his... particular contempt for my government or his personal spat with the rebel sorcerers. I am willing to forgive these crimes, but first I must insist the stallion answer for them himself and display remorse for any wrongdoing. It is unacceptable to simply wipe away his record based on your plea while he wanders about the countryside doing... well, whatever it is he does when he's not busy assaulting my soldiers or my enemies."
Then she pursed her lips. "There is also another... complication. We haven't heard a thing about Blood Rite or Swan Song since the incident at Coltson. And, as I said, we weren't able to question Ranma Saotome at the scene of Twilight's rescue. We don't know if the sorcerers are dead, or wounded, or still conducting their evil plan much like before. More importantly, we also don't know what happened to the artifact they were using to threaten our kingdom."
Celestia's expression soured considerably. "On the occasion of your rescue, Twilight, I implored Mister Saotome to aid me in recovering this artifact. For the safety of the kingdom, it must be located and secured, and the fate of all of Equestria might hang in the balance." Her muzzle scrunched up. "He said 'no' and then vanished in a burst of smoke."
"So... hold on. What does this hafta do with clearin' the bounty?" Applejack asked. "Yer not saying you won't do it 'cuz he refused to help, are ya?"
"Not precisely, Applejack," Celestia said, shaking her head. "Although I'm... not pleased at his response, I do not wish to punish him for impertinence or anything of the sort. However, the knowledge he likely has of the artifact is too important to simply let go because he doesn't wish to explain the..." she paused to look over the bounty poster, and her eyes widened. "FIVE arson charges?! How does a non-unicorn without so much as a flame cutie mark amass five separate arson charges?!"
"Well, one of 'em is probably Twilight's house," Applejack pointed out.
Celestia recoiled in shock. "He's the one who burnt down your house?!"
"No! No, that is NOT accurate! He was involved, technically, but it definitely wasn't his fault!" Twilight protested, completely mortified. "And I certainly didn't report it as an arson, so none of those are mine!"
"Oh. So he burnt down five other buildin's? And we're s'pposed to assume these're 'misunderstandings' too?"
"C'mon, AJ," Rainbow scoffed, "this guy explodes whenever anypony uses magic on him. How hard would it be for him to burn down five buildings by accident?"
"Huh. Okay, yeah, Ah guess ya got me there."
Celestia stared. Twilight sighed.
"That is... mostly accurate. He does tend to explode when exposed to magic that isn't supposed to make him explode. It's uncanny, actually," grumbled the younger alicorn.
"The more I hear about this stallion, the more convinced I am that he really should be brought to justice and locked up. For his own safety, if nothing else," Celestia said bluntly.
"But what about all the good stuff he's done?" Rainbow Dash asked. "We don't know what would have happened to this Rite guy or Twilight if Ranma hadn't come along!"
"Yes, and that's precisely the problem," the white Princess chided. "We don't know what he did to Rite or how he came upon Twilight, nor what his exact intentions are. I want him to answer these questions. The bounty is a means of securing him so that he might be interrogated. A crude, unpleasant means, certainly, but not the only one I'm exploring."
Twilight hung her head as Celestia rolled up the amended bounty poster. "Yes, Princess. I understand."
"Make no mistake, Twilight; I don't refuse your request lightly," Celestia assured her. "I trust you. I know you would not have asked me for this pardon unless you thought it was the right thing to do. And the information you've given me will be extremely valuable in ensuring that he is SAFELY delivered to Canterlot to answer for his crimes."
She paused, and then glanced back at the poster. "I'll definitely have to have a warning included not to use magic on him under any circumstances. Hmmm... perhaps also fireproof bonds?"
The Princess of the Sun shook her head. "But anyway, there is too much at stake to leave Mister Saotome be. I'm sorry, Twilight."
"Aw, phooey," Rainbow groused, kicking at the ground.
"Rough luck, Ah guess," Applejack said solemnly.
"I'm, uh, a little concerned about something else," Twilight said, fidgeting nervously again. "If you keep the bounty up, more and more ponies are going to go after him to try to violently subdue him. Bounty hunters, soldiers, and probably even random adventurers and mercenaries as well. That... That's a really bad idea."
Celestia arched an eyebrow.
"This pony is POWERFUL. Conventionally powerful, I mean! In terms of physical strength, speed, and resilience! But to an incredible degree that I've never encountered before! Between his personal power and his magic allergy, I'm not sure it's even possible to subdue him with ordinary means! Which means that we're sending dozens, maybe hundreds of ponies into a fight that they can't win! We're just getting decent ponies injured and making Ranma mad!"
Princess Celestia mulled that protest for a few seconds. "... I'm sure they will endure and emerge triumphant. I have faith in the guards and soldiers of Equestria who have been entrusted with our nation's defense," she replied evenly.
"Really? Have you SEEN those guys?" Rainbow quipped.
Celestia ignored her. "That said, I do value your analysis, Twilight. If Mister Saotome cannot be captured via ordinary means, then I do have more... extraordinary means at my disposal. I don't think it will take quite as long as you imagine. But thank you."
"I... I see. Thank you for your time, Princess." Twilight's head drooped in a way that could possibly be mistaken for a nod, and she heaved a miserable sigh before she turned around and headed for the exit. Rainbow Dash and Applejack glanced at each other, frowned, and then followed after their friend a moment later.







"Welp... On the one hoof, we managed to get the Princess to clean up the bounty notice and insist on taking Ranma alive. On the other hoof, we also blew his cover on that whole 'Havoc' identity, and now she seems more intent than ever on bringin' him in," Applejack said with a shrug. "Ah guess that's just about a wash."
Twilight, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash were sitting in a plaza outside Canterlot Castle, reflecting upon their recent failure. Applejack seemed to take it in stride, but Twilight was clearly depressed, and Rainbow Dash had a squinty-eyed expression that suggested she was trying to think.
"I understand Princess Celestia's reasoning, but I didn't expect her to be so indifferent to the damage that could be caused while Ranma remains at large and hunted by the authorities!" Twilight complained, her eyes fixed on the ground. "How many ponies will be hospitalized hurling themselves at a stallion who can defeat dragonkin and Equestrian Generals?"
Applejack tilted her head to the side thoughtfully. "That's a good point, Ah guess... but it don't exactly make a good case fer leavin' him alone."
Rainbow Dash suddenly snapped her head up. "I've got it!"
Twilight and Applejack groaned.
"Oh, shut up! This plan is perfect!" the racer protested, jumping into the air and hovering above her friends. "First, we just need to wait until nightfall!"
"Yer not gonna suggest that we ask Princess Luna fer the pardon since Princess Celestia turned us down, are ya?" Applejack asked.
Rainbow Dash remained hovering for several seconds, saying nothing. Then she dropped back to the ground and glared at Applejack. "Okay, smartflank, so what's wrong with that idea?"
"Ah knew it. Ya seem like the type to run to Papa if yer Mama ever told ya 'no,'" the farmer chuckled.
"Still not hearing a reason why it isn't the best plan ever!" Rainbow said.
"Rainbow, even if I don't agree with Princess Celestia's reasoning, I'm not going to undermine her by trying to get Princess Luna to do what I want," Twilight grumbled.
"So... the problem with the plan is that we need to leave you behind." Rainbow Dash scratched at her chin. "Yeah, that's gonna be an issue."
"I just feel so helpless!" Twilight moped. "After everything almost fell apart and Ranma rescued me out of nowhere, is this all I can do for him in return? Get the bounty hunters to stick to non-lethal weapons?"
"Hey, that ain't nothin'," Applejack assured her. "And the Princess said that if he ever DOES get caught, all he's gotta do is apologize an' he's a free pony!"
Rainbow Dash winced. "Yeeaaaah... I was only around Ranma for, like, a minute, but... I definitely got the impression he's not big on apologizing."
"I'd love it if that were the biggest impediment right now. We don't even know where he is," Twilight said miserably. Then she squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed her forehead under her horn. "I wonder if all this concern about the MacGuffin Stone is mostly based on WHOA WHAT IS THAT."
Applejack and Rainbow Dash looked alarmed as Twilight snapped her head up and then started searching back and forth.
"What? What's going on?"
"You okay, sugarcube?"
"I... I don't know," Twilight mumbled. "I saw... Back when my eyes were closed, I suddenly saw some kind of... light, I guess? It's not quite right, but..."
"Well, if you're okay, what were you talking about? What's the 'MacGuffin Stone?'" Rainbow asked.
Twilight felt something in the back of her mind. A few errant flickers at the edge of her perception. As she considered Rainbow's question, the flickers became a beacon. A small light among her thoughts pointing the way.
"I... I can see it," the purple alicorn mumbled.
"What? Ya can see what?"
Twilight closed her eyes and slowly turned her head. "The MacGuffin Stone... if I think about it... I can tell where it is! I can sense it! When did this happen?"
"Okay, and that's... good? That's good, right?" Rainbow asked. "I mean, what IS the MacGuffin Stone, anyhow?"
"It's the artifact Princess Celestia is looking for," Twilight explained.
"Yer bein' serious, now? That's what it's called?" Applejack asked incredulously.
"Yes, I know. The name is silly. That's really not important, though!" Twilight kept her eyes squeezed shut, concentrating on the light shining in her thoughts. "It seems to be a directional sense... like a compass! The MacGuffin Stone is this way!" She jabbed a foreleg ahead of her, aimed straight toward the beacon.
"It's in Donut Joe's shop?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Twilight opened her eyes, and she was slightly embarrassed to find herself pointing directly toward the store in question. "Uh... well, it's not... maybe..."
She broke into a gallop, rushing to the other side of the plaza. Then she closed her eyes again.
"No! The direction is the same! South-by-southwest!" Twilight raised her foreleg again to point, this time gesturing past the donut shop. "If I can move and the change in direction is negligible, that suggests it's far away! Which is as expected! There's no way the MacGuffin Stone would be here in Canterlot."
Applejack and Rainbow Dash trotted over to join their friend.
"So, what's the deal? You can sense important treasure now? Is this a new spell or something?" Rainbow asked.
"I don't think that's it. I seem to have formed some kind of... connection, I suppose, with the MacGuffin Stone since I was trapped inside it. Does Ranma have this power too? Maybe even the sorcerers do! It would explain how Ranma and Rite have been able to stay on each other's tails constantly even though nopony else could find them!" Twilight looked stunned, and she stared off into the sky.
"Well, this's neat n'all, but... what're ya gonna to do with it?" Applejack asked, scratching her head under her hat.
Rainbow Dash smacked her front hooves together while grinning. "DUH! We use the MacGuffin Sense to track down the Big Bad and teach him a lesson! We'll stop him once and for all, Princess Celestia can have her dorky artifact, and maybe Ranma can finally get a break once the future of Equestria doesn't hang in the balance."
"Why? Twi can just tell Princess Celestia where it is and the army can handle it," Applejack pointed out.
"What? And leave us behind? No way!" Rainbow protested. "AJ, we have a bad guy threatening all of Equestria with a magical something-or-other, all the authorities have been completely useless, and we have a special power on our side that will let us help. This is TOTALLY our thing!"
"And what happens if Blood Rite doesn't have the MacGuffin Stone?" Twilight said suddenly, her expression grim. "What if Princess Celestia leads an army to find the artifact and finds Ranma along with it?"
Applejack and Rainbow Dash shared a perplexed look.
"Um... Ah dunno. What happens then?" the farmer asked.
"Then Princess Celestia is going to do whatever it takes to get the Stone. And as for Ranma? He doesn't care about alicorns, much less respect us. He brushed off Princess Luna and happily fought her to a standstill, and she wasn't even trying to capture him! If the Equestrian army corners him, never mind Princess Celestia herself, there could be a massacre!"
A heavy silence hung in the air.
"Ya really think... he could take on Princess Celestia?" Applejack asked uneasily.
"The idea is completely ridiculous," Twilight said darkly, "but so is everything else I know about Ranma Saotome. We CAN'T let that confrontation happen." She turned back toward the glimmering light in the back of her thoughts. "If we can find Ranma first, we can talk him down and get him to turn himself in so that he can be pardoned and the Stone can be secured! He'll listen to me! He's really not an unreasonable pony at all!"
"He DID seem surprisingly cool with you blowing him up," Rainbow pointed out.
"... Yes. Exactly," the young Princess agreed through gritted teeth. "THANK YOU, Rainbow Dash."
"Okay, Ah see yer point," Applejack allowed. "But what if it's Blood Rite that has the MacGuffin after all? Last Ah recall, you didn't come out of yer last meetin' with him in very good shape."
"You're right. I didn't. I was being somewhat careless back then, but even in a fair fight I can't guarantee that I could handle him on my own." Twilight turned toward her friends and broke a smile. "So will you come with me?"
"Ha! Are you serious?! Of course I'm coming along!" Rainbow said brightly, suddenly doing an aerial somersault for no reason. "I still can't believe you left me behind the FIRST time! If I'd have been there, Blood Rite wouldn't have laid so much as a hoof on you!"
"Aw, shucks. Looks like Big Mac'll be takin' on extra chores again," Applejack sighed. "But nothin' fer it. Between the crazy cursed pony and crazy Rainbow Dash, somepony's gotta look after y'all."
"Thanks, girls," Twilight beamed. "I'd invite the others too, but we'll need to leave quickly and move fast. We can take the train south until the heading for the MacGuffin Stone starts to shift, and then we'll be hoofing it from there."
"Sounds like a plan! I'll be ready to go in a flash!" Rainbow said, doing a quick somersault in the air.
"Ah might need an hour to get Mac up to speed and pack some things, but Ah'll make the train," Applejack agreed.


The three ponies turned and headed toward the train station. Twilight and Applejack raced through the streets at a gallop, while Rainbow Dash kept pace in the air above them.
Then the pegasus started snickering. "Who else was trying not to laugh when the Princess mentioned 'somepony blue' showing up next to Ranma?"
"Took everythin' Ah had to keep from rollin' around on the floor imaginin' the look on Trixie's face."
"I seriously wonder if she's relieved to be completely overlooked while ponies hunt Ranma down or if it drives her crazy that she doesn't have her own bounty."
"HAH!"







Trixie's ear twitched, and she turned her head around, looking off to the side of the road. There was nothing there, save numerous dry, withered trees jutting out of the cracked and wasted ground. The foliage was so thin that it would have been nearly impossible to hide in ambush, and after a few tense seconds, the magician relaxed.
"Something wrong, Trix?" Ranma asked.
"... No. Trixie must have been imagining things," Trixie replied. "Don't slow down. We're almost to the next town."


Ranma continued down the road, his hooves beating against the increasing hard-packed dirt. The terrain had been getting noticeably worse the deeper into the valley they traveled, and now that they were approaching the first town the earth had very nearly been reduced to wasteland. When they had been ambushed their road had been flanked by scraggly brush and lush trees. Now they were surrounded by cracked rock formations and skeletal deadwood. On the side of the path, the occasional animal skull and unlabeled grave - mounds of dirt with rocks piled conspicuously on top - completed the image of desolation and poverty.
Trixie wasn't an earth pony and didn't have any particular feel for the land, but she could easily tell that this was a troubled region. She had been expecting as much, of course, but seeing the terrain in the state it was suggested that the rot was more than just a criminal element grown out of control. The very air tasted bad. Partially in that it was far too dry and dusty for a non-desert region, but it also carried an ill feeling beyond that.
If Trixie were the melodramatic type, she'd say that ponies' hopes had died here, and were rotting away in the wind.
As they rolled up on the town itself, more evidence of decay and neglect became evident. Large wooden fencing around the settlement was broken in several points. Some of the buildings near the perimeter had been torched, their burnt ruins left alone where they had collapsed. Many of the areas behind buildings were dedicated to growing crops, and interestingly enough these fields looked completely untouched. Despite the obviously poor weather conditions and soil, talented earth ponies could get food to grow almost anywhere, and clearly those skills had been pushed to their limit here.
"I see these bandits are the economic type. The farmland looks completely untouched," Trixie mumbled aloud as they approached the gate.
"What do you mean?" Ranma asked.
"Stupid bandits will ransack the fields directly, damaging the crops. That means that there's less food for them to take later, especially if the farmers starve to death or flee their land. Smarter bandits take the harvested produce only, and leave enough for the farmers to survive on. That way there's a steady supply of goods. This gang must be pretty well-organized."
"Huh... okay, that makes sense. Do you know a lot about thieves?" Ranma asked.
"You're not the only one Trixie has ever worked with."
Ranma jerked to a halt. "Hey! I'm no thief!" he snapped back at the unicorn.
"You're easily the most capable pickpocket and burglar Trixie has ever heard of," she drawled. "There are many ponies Trixie's met whose special talents and careers revolve around swiping objects and Trixie would wager you'd put every one of them to shame."
"Well that's... I mean, sure I would! But I don't do those things!"
"Trixie only knows that you can do those things because she witnessed you doing those things."
"I meant besides those times!"
Trixie rolled her eyes. "You know what? Fine. Have it your way. You're a very good martial artist whose skills happen to ALSO make you incredibly effective at thieving. Is that better?"
"Much better. Thank you," Ranma said with a huff before he again accelerated toward the town.
"ANYWAY, as Trixie was saying, these bandits have clearly been at this for a while. If they've pulled in the local governors as well, then this has crossed the line from simple raiding to criminal business enterprise. Less thugs and roughnecks ransacking villages and more a regular flow of goods and duties, as if they were collecting taxes."
"Is that better or worse?" Ranma asked.
"In Trixie's opinion? Worse. Less violence, obviously, but it's so dull! Corruption and evil, if it has to exist, should at least be exciting and dramatic."
"Well, I'll see what I can do about that..."


There was nopony to greet, warn, or even see them at the town's gate, but as soon as they crossed the threshold Ranma could sense they were being watched. He didn't change his expression or movement, heading steadily down the main road, but without so much as turning his head he pinpointed three individuals watching them from hiding.
Trixie's awareness wasn't quite so developed, but she definitely got a sense of foreboding once they walked among the silent and battered buildings of the settlement. She could see signs of life within the village: buckets of water sitting next to doors, clothes lines drying in the sun, and a few cats fighting on a fence. But not a single pony was out and about on the streets.
Before long, she spotted a tavern. It was worn down and battered, with much of the railing of the front porch chopped and broken. Gouges and divots decorated the wooden exterior, and all of the windows had been shattered and boarded up, giving the distinct impression that it had been exposed to much worse than the usual barroom brawls. Trixie considered, however, that at least this building's owner had bothered to remove the arrows and weapons that had hit it. Several of the other structures showed no such care.
"Okay, this will do," Trixie said, gesturing to the tavern.
Ranma adjusted his course, bringing the wagon into a small empty space next to the porch. Trixie hopped down immediately, and then walked over to her bodyguard while he was removing his harness.
She whispered something in his ear at length. Ranma paused to listen, and then nodded sharply before he finished removing his harness.


Trixie pushed aside the door to the tavern. The hinges creaked painfully, and the door itself shuddered as if it were trying to hold itself together from the contact.
The tavern interior was much like the exterior, with the significant exception of actual equine life. Precisely three ponies occupied the building aside from Trixie: a pegasus mare behind the bar, and a pair of old earth pony stallions sitting at opposite ends of the establishment and huddling over mugs of drink as if they were afraid somepony was going to trot up and swipe them. Which, for all Trixie knew, was a legitimate concern around here.
All three ponies glanced Trixie's way as she entered. The stallions looked surprised, and then nervous, returning to their drinks and looking away anxiously. The pegasus grimaced, and then reared up to put her front hooves on the counter.
"Welcome to Trotter's Gulch, stranger. If you're thirsty take a seat, but I'd advise you to move along as soon as possible."
Trixie approached the bar. "Trotter's Gulch? Huh. Trixie didn't see any signs naming the town."
"Roughnecks took 'em or smashed 'em, and nopony can afford to put up new ones," the bartender grumbled. "And we don't really take a lot of pride in our little corner of Equestria nowadays. Ya seen one dirt pit, ya seen 'em all."
Trixie hopped up onto one of the stools at the counter. "What do you have in the way of ciders?"
"Nothing," the mare grunted. "We have dandelion ale and water. Either one is three bits a mug."
Trixie recoiled, grimacing. "Dandelion ale? Trixie didn't even know that was a thing."
"It's the only thing I bother to stock anymore," the bartender replied, sweeping a wing toward her shelves. The bottles were various shapes and colors, but every one of them had a piece of masking tape slapped over the side with a dandelion drawn on it. "It's dirt cheap to make, and it tastes so vile that nopony even wants to steal it. You want any, or no?"
"Trixie will take water," the magician mumbled, floating a trio of bits onto the counter.
The bartender snatched the money away with her wing, moving so swiftly that Trixie almost jumped in surprise. Then the pegasus looked back and forth, her eyes narrowed, and quickly stashed the money somewhere under the counter rather than in the dusty register on top. Once the money was out of sight she seemed to calm down considerably, and she filled a mug with water from a tap behind the bar.
"So what's your story, Miss?" the pegasus asked before turning around, a filled tankard on her wing. With a deft movement, she swiped the wing over the counter, and the mug of water dropped in front of Trixie along with a stray feather. "Ponies don't stop in this town for no reason. Not anymore."
"Trixie is looking into the local bandit problem to see if she can solve the local bounty hunter problem," Trixie replied before lifting the mug to her lips.
The bartender furrowed her brow. "I'm not familiar with any 'bounty hunter problem,' unless you're referring to 'em all being dead or gone. Sticking up for the law around here is a good way to end up in an unmarked grave before your time, Miss."
Trixie didn't answer right away, drinking her water and looking around. He ears were perked, and she spared a glance toward the entrance expectantly.
"Hmmm... This is taking longer than Trixie expected. The outlaws around here really ARE smarter than usual."
"Pardon?" The bartender asked. "What's taking longer? What did you-"
A loud thump and a cry of pain came from outside, and the pegasus jumped in fright. The two other ponies flinched away, hugging their ale tankards and looking like they were on the verge of sobbing.
"Wh-What? What was that?" the bartender asked. Her voice was on edge and her fur bristled.
"That was Trixie's lead," the magician said, taking another sip of water.
"Lead? What are you talking about? Lead to what?" the pegasus demanded.


The door swung open before Trixie responded, and three ponies were hurled into the building one at a time. Each one landed in a heap and groaned in pain, largely unmoving and clearly injured. They all wore shoulder cloaks to conceal small weapons and their cutie marks - important for one trying to ply an illegal trade - and had belts and pouches strapped to their legs for holding filched goods.
Ranma stood in the doorway, and he looked over to Trixie. "Will this do it?"
"Yes, that's fine. Go guard the wagon. But openly, this time. Trixie doesn't think we'll need to catch more trouble-makers."
The pigtailed stallion bobbed his head and turned around, pulling the door closed behind him. Trixie took a long gulp from her tankard while the bartender gaped. The other tavern patrons looked terrified, but they clearly weren't sure what, exactly, they should be afraid of yet.
"What is this? What are you doing?" the bartender asked, nervousness creeping into her voice.
"Trixie just needs a little information," the magician said, dropping down from her stool. Her mug of water floated along behind her head, carried on a trail of pink magic. "Trixie could just ask you, of course, but you seem like you're not the type to trust strangers."
She stopped in front of the confused and miserable thieves, and one by one they twisted their heads to look up at her.
"Hi! You're all probably wondering what just happened to you. Trixie imagines you saw an apparently unattended wagon piled high with supplies and cash, and naturally sought to help yourselves to a bag or two. And then, the moment you touched the wagon, you suddenly found yourself hurtling through the air or staring at a rapidly approaching hoof. And now here you are!"
She paused to take a sip from her mug. "You should know that you three have tried to steal from the Great and Powerful Trixie, and as such have volunteered to be beaten, humiliated, and then forced to betray your evil crime overlord at incredible risk to yourselves! Any questions so far?"
One of the thieves squinted at Trixie, and his expression turned angry. "Just who the hay do you think you are?!"
"It sounds like you want to go first!" Trixie chirped.
Her mug lowered itself to the floor, and then her magic took hold of the stallion's cloak and threw it to the side. This revealed his cutie mark - a cloth sack with a cut string - and a dagger set in a sheathe on his back leg. Trixie's magic seized on the knife immediately, and the thief's eyes widened as the blade drew itself and then swung around to poke into the back of his neck.
"Let's cut right to the chase. No pun intended. Where does Morning Star live?" Trixie asked.
"Wait, what?" asked another of the thieves. She was a unicorn mare, and her eyes went wide at Trixie's question. "You're after Morning Star?!"
"Trixie is a little busy threatening this other thug right now; if you want to be interrogated at knifepoint yourself, you'll have to wait your turn," the magician explained.
The first thief shook his head. "You're crazy if you want to cross Morning Star. You've clearly got some nerve and some muscle on your side, and if you don't push your luck that'll be enough to get out of Venom Valley in one piece and keep most of your bits. But fighting Morning Star is insane for anypony without an army at their back."
"Trixie is a perfectly sane mare in a desperately insane world," she sighed wearily. "Sadly, that sometimes means Trixie must accommodate the less-sane elements in her life. So here Trixie is, holding dangerous criminals at knife-point in order to track down a bandit king to kick his flank. Go figure."
"Wait, you don't think WE work for Morning Star, do you?" the third pony asked.
"If you have any especially convincing evidence to the contrary, now is the time to present it," Trixie said.
"We don't! And we don't know where Star's hideout is, either!" claimed the unicorn. "We're just local thieves! Morning Star hasn't taken us in, yet!"
Trixie quirked an eyebrow. "Yet?"
The other two ponies glared at the mare sharply, but she kept talking in a panic. "That's right! We pass along information and some of our takings to the Star gang when they show up! They told us that if we do well enough, they'll take us in and make us part of the gang!"
"So this Morning Star even has a recruitment program. Lovely," Trixie murmured.
"It's true," confirmed the bartender. "Once the Star gang showed up, they became the most successful game in town. Not only did a bunch of the younger ponies join up out of fear, greed, or lust, but it also attracted independent thugs and thieves to our villages from all around to try to join up." She sneered at the criminals lying on the floor. "For every decent, hard-working pony that manages to leave, five of these mules show up and start causing trouble trying to impress the big boss."
"That certainly sounds..." Trixie trailed off, her brow furrowing. "Wait, lust? What does lust-"
"Look, we don't know where the Morning Star hideout is, okay? Nopony does unless they're in the gang!" one of the thieves squeaked. "Please let us go! We're sorry for trying to rob you!"
Trixie pushed aside her previous question to address the criminals again. "And Trixie supposes none of you low-lifes know how to get in touch with the gang if you need to?"
"We get to talk to them when they show up! We can't just call them up whenever we want!"
"And you're lucky for that! If we could call down a bandit army on your flanks, we would!"
Trixie didn't respond, thinking quietly while taking another sip of water.
Suddenly, one of the tavern patrons pushed his mug away and dropped down from his chair. He trotted quickly to the exit and left, refusing to make eye contact with any other pony and shaking like a leaf the entire time.
Trixie briefly glanced at the stallion while he left, and then stared down at the injured criminals.
"Well, it seems you're of no use to Trixie after all. A pity."
The levitating dagger started moving higher, and the outlaws quivered in fear and squeezed their eyes shut. The barkeep gulped and took a step back, staring at the scene warily.
The confiscated dagger suddenly stabbed downward. The jingle of coins came a moment later, after one of the thieves' purses dropped onto the floor. The dagger floated upward again, its edge conspicuously free of blood.
"Wh-What? What are you doing?" the thief asked.
"Trixie is relieving you of your ill-gotten spoils, obviously. Perhaps this will teach you that crime doesn't pay," the magician sniffed. The dagger stabbed down toward the next pony, cutting her leg pouch free as well.
"So you're stealing from us? After you beat us up for stealing? Are you going to return those bits to their rightful owners or something?" asked the final thief.
Again the dagger fell, and this time the outlaw yelped in pain as the blade nicked his flank.
"Oops. Sorry about that," Trixie drawled before floating the dagger onto the table next to her. A moment later all three purses hovered up into the air and floated beside her. "Trixie is done with you. Go away."


The thieves didn't hesitate any longer. Stumbling painfully to their hooves, they limped out of the tavern with their heads held low. They paused only briefly once they were outside, staring at the stallion seated next to Trixie's cart and yawning. He didn't look especially intimidating in such a passive moment, especially when wearing a purple star-spangled cloak to match Trixie's outfit. But every one of the would-be bandits remembered how easily the stallion had dropped down from the tavern roof and dispatched them before they'd even figured out what was happening. Despite the bruises still growing over various portions of their bodies, each one of the miscreants felt they had probably gotten off easy in this encounter.
With a fearful shudder, the pony thieves raced off into the alleyways from whence they came.


Back in the tavern, Trixie briefly considered the three floating purses in front of her before magically tossing one in front of the bartender.
"Sorry about the trouble. Trixie didn't want to grill those fools outside and draw more attention," the magician mumbled, "or crossbow bolts."
The pegasus snatched the pouch up with her wing, casting a quick glare at the other patron in the establishment. In an eye blink, the purse had vanished under the fold of her feathers. "I'm glad you show your gratitude with bits rather than just words... But I think you're going to get plenty of attention AND projectiles soon anyway."
"Trixie imagines so," the unicorn replied, slipping the rest of the money under her hat.
The bartender stepped closer to whisper in her ear. "I'm pretty sure that bloke that ran out of here, Sour Grapes, is an informant. Morning Star is going to know all about you before the night is out, I'll bet." She shook her head. "Honestly, I agree with the thugs about you being crazy to take on the Star gang. It cheered my heart to see somepony rough 'em up a little, but you'll want to head on back where you came from before things get ugly."
"Trixie appreciates your concern," the magician said, a smug smile crossing her face. She levitated her mug to her lips, and slurped up the last of her water. "... But things are proceeding perfectly, so it wouldn't make sense for Trixie to give up just yet."
The bartender looked confused, but Trixie regarded her with a smug smile while she walked toward the entrance. "Thanks for the water. If circumstances allow, Trixie will stop by again later. Trixie expects to have a lot more money by then, so see if you can scrounge together something more appetizing than dandelion ale. Goodbye."







Hours later, in a cavern not too far from Trotter's Gulch, a pegasus crept down a torch-lit tunnel.
The pegasus was obviously a bandit. Mangy, scarred, and hardened by a tough life of raiding and internecine skirmishes. He bore a scimitar in mid-chop for a cutie mark, superimposed over a pair of wings, and an actual scimitar was sheathed along his flank.
The tunnel he plodded through had clearly been dug for mining originally, and the old and crumbling infrastructure still served its new owners to an extent. Rusted tracks ran through the tunnels, allowing for stolen goods to be pushed through via cart. The lights above had long since been shattered and lost power, but the electrical rigging had been reused in places. The many shelves and racks among the scaffolding were now piled with treasures, bottles, sacks, and numerous trinkets of dubious value.
Tunnels branched off into small rooms. Food stashes, bedrooms, baths, and various other living amenities were built over depleted ore seams and mining pits. Other bandits crossed the stallion's path or watched him pass, offering grunts of greeting or silent glares.
The pegasus ignored them all, walking up an earthen stairwell to a large, iron set of double-doors near the end of the mine. A pair of unicorn skulls were nailed to the front, with torches set in them such that flames seemed to leak from the eye sockets. They were a melodramatic decoration taken from random skeletons found in the mines, not defeated ponies; Morning Star wasn't one to celebrate combat victories with grisly trophies. Mostly because there was rarely much trophy material left from the losers.
He banged a hoof on the door, and then waited.
It took several minutes before a loud clunking sound came from the other side. The doors slowly opened inward, their hinges squealing. The pegasus quickly slipped inside, and the doors promptly slammed shut behind him.


The bandit boss's room was just about as opulent and over-decorated as a poorly maintained mining cave could be. Plush rugs covered the uneven ground, dirty and torn in places from lack of care and the rough environs. Several bottles of various fancy liquors sat in a barrel filled with magic ice; a frosty collection of small, glassy orbs that constantly radiated cold mist. The empty bottles were scattered around the room, along with a few stacks of dirty plates and less impressive treasures that had been pushed somewhere out of the way. Bits and jewels were everywhere, occasionally piled around the antique urns and chests that were supposed to hold them, and occasionally splashed across the ground as if somepony had just dropped them there and forgotten.
The centerpiece of the room was a gigantic bed covered in expensive silk sheets and pillows. It had clearly seen vigorous and recent use, as evidenced by a lithe, charcoal-black earth pony mare lounging on her side near the headboard. At the edge of the bed was an unusually burly unicorn with muddy-colored fur and scars criss-crossing his flanks.
"Where's the fire, Air Raid?" the unicorn asked with an arched eyebrow. "You look a little tense."
"Yeah, well, we might have a problem. There's trouble in Trotter's Gulch," Raid growled, sitting down in front of the bed. "Earlier today I intercepted a bunch of beat-up villagers limping back home. I figured there wouldn't be much to take from them, since it looked like one of the other guys already roughed them up and shook them down. I was wrong. Apparently these dopes got it in their heads to try to score a bounty reward to drum up some bits. It didn't go over so well."
"Pffft!" the other stallion struggled to contain his laughter. "You serious? They were going to come after us? And they got walloped before we even noticed?"
"No. They didn't come after us. They went after HIM." Raid grimly pointed a wing over to a wall.
The wall was decorated with various purloined art pieces, all arranged haphazardly with many of them hanging crooked. Among them were a few scattered photos and bounty posters, including one that had a place of prominence near the top for boasting the highest reward total.
"These mules actually managed to track down Havoc and went for the kill. Judging by the results, they didn't come close to getting it. He and his partner thrashed them, took everything they had, and let them limp home with their lives."
The mare on the bed stirred, looking up at the poster with a lazy smile. "Oh really? The dreamy one is here? Interesting!" She giggled into her hoof, and the unicorn cast an annoyed glance her way.
"Yeah. Interesting. After that I got flagged down by Sour Grapes in Trotter's Gulch, and he told me something else 'interesting.'" Raid clenched his teeth. "Apparently two ponies arrived in town and started a dust-up with a few thugs. Grapes ID'd one of them as the 'Great and Powerful Trixie,' whoever that's supposed to be, and said the other one was a cloaked stallion who beat up the greenhorns like they were nothing. I'm no detective, but it sounds like Havoc's marching on our turf."
The mare smiled more broadly, her eyes fixed on the poster on the wall. Her tail started flicking, brushing against the stallion next to her.
"And it gets worse," Raid said solemnly. "According to Grapes, this 'Trixie' brat and the big bounty are here for us."
This startled the other ponies out of their contemplation. The unicorn jumped off the bed and narrowed his eyes at the other stallion.
"What? A bounty target is trying to score a bounty reward? How the hay does THAT work!?"
"I don't know if they're after the bounty. The mare said something about clearing up a 'bandit problem' and then tried to pry the location of our hideout from the kids. I guess that's when Grapes bolted to set up the signal."
"So this mule's looking for a fight, eh? We can oblige," the unicorn growled, cracking his neck from side to side. "Hay, maybe WE should turn in HIS bounty! We can have Grapes or some other useful idiot cash him in for us! Turnabout is fair play, right?"
Raid's wings shifted and re-settled, squirming while the pegasus scowled. "I don't like it. This stallion is supposed to be an honest-to-Celestia rebel warrior. Like, he's fought off multiple assaults from the Royal Guard. This isn't a pony to be taken lightly."
"The Royal Guard? Big deal! We've chased them off too!"
"Yeah. With some key bribes and a small ARMY. We're talking two ponies strolling from one hostile territory to the next like it's nothing, leaving demolished buildings and piles of injured guards in their wake."
"You're not getting cold hooves, are you Raid?"
"Are you even listening to me?! You don't know half the crazy rumors surrounding this stallion!"
"If the rumors are crazy, they're probably wrong. Don't believe every half-drunk tirade you hear in town."
"These were in the papers, not the taverns! You're such a-"
"Boys," the mare suddenly interrupted, "stop fighting."
The stallions winced, and their ears pinned back. "Yes, Boss," they mumbled in stereo.


The dark-furred pony slinked out of bed, pausing briefly to run a hoof through her long, bright blond mane. As the sheets of the bed slipped away from her flank, they revealed the cutie mark on her hip: an ornate broadsword pointed down, with a flail wrapped around it.
"I'm surprised that Havoc ended up traveling through here... Surprised, and very happy." She walked up to the wall where the bounty posters were hung, and gazed lovingly at the drawing of a pigtailed stallion rearing up. "Mysterious ponies are so sexy, don't you think? I wonder what he wants. I wonder where he came from. I wonder how his bounty managed to go from three digits to six in a month!" She giggled into a hoof.
The stallions didn't seem nearly so amused, and they glared sourly the poster.
"Chances are he's looking for a fight, Morning Star," Raid growled, "and despite Hammer's 'brilliant' idea for criminals to try to get bounty payouts, I recommend we leave this one alone. We lay low, he doesn't find anything to do in the valley, he moves on. Simple, safe, and easy."
Hammer Time snorted, blasting steam from his nostrils. "Nopony will take us seriously if we back down as soon as anypony with a rep strolls through our territory. This punk has a problem with us, and he has cash he collected from OUR villagers. I say we make an example of him and give his marefriend a good story to tell about what happens to those who cross Morning Star."
Morning Star reared up and snatched the poster off the wall. She held it up and stared at it, grinning.
"No. We're not doing either of those things. I want this stallion." She flicked her hoof to the side, and the poster glided across the room toward her henchponies.
Hammer's horn flashed, freezing the poster in mid-air within an aura of blue magic. "Wait... you want him to join up with the gang?" he asked incredulously.
Morning Star smirked over her shoulder. "If possible. If not, then I'd settle for a brief meeting... alone." She ran her tongue over her lips, and Raid shifted uncomfortably.
"Boss, this isn't just some pretty colt we're talking about," the pegasus warned. "Havoc has a longer rap sheet than you! Even if he doesn't want to fight us, this guy could bring an entire army of guards onto our heads if he's tracked here! He's dangerous!"
"I know," Star said simply. "That's what makes him so interesting." She started sauntering toward Air Raid, her tail swinging provocatively with her hips. "Think about it, Raid: A stallion rumored to have stood up to the Princesses themselves! Not out of petty greed or some personal grudge, but just to be FREE! To challenge the stranglehold of those fussy alicorns living in their gleaming towers half a world away! Wouldn't you like to meet a pony like that?" Her grin stretched even wider. "I would."
"Do we... uh... know that's the reason why he did it?" Hammer asked, narrowing his eyes at the bounty poster.
"No," Star admitted, "but I'd dearly like to find out."
She placed a hoof tenderly against Raid's chest and leaned against him, and the pegasus swallowed deeply. A rich, intoxicating scent crossed his nostrils, and he felt his legs quiver underneath him.
"Take a few others and head to Trotter's Gulch. Make this stallion an offer he can't refuse," Star whispered, her voice unnecessarily husky.
"What..." Raid paused to gulp again. "What should I do if he refuses anyway?"
"You're a clever boy. I'm sure you'll think of something." Morning Star smiled, and then leaned forward to give Raid a peck on the lips. The stallion's legs visibly trembled this time, and his wings started spreading of their own volition.
She turned away. "Hammer Time, you go with him. And stay on your best behavior, do you understand?" Star arched an eyebrow at the unicorn, who was already sulking. "If anything unfortunate happens to Havoc on your watch, you won't be returning to my bed chambers any time soon. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Boss," Hammer grunted miserably. A pulse of his magic rolled up the bounty poster, and he took the identifying document in his teeth.
"I'm a little less worried about one of us taking him down on the sly than I am about him breaking us all in half one by one," Air Raid groused, shaking off his earlier spell of arousal. "This pony is hunting us, and we're not even supposed to defend ourselves?"
"Raid, you would be so much more attractive if you weren't such a pessimist," Morning Star sighed. "This can't be that hard. He's a criminal, like us, not some kind of hero. His crimes are... different, sure. But anypony can be bought. Try to keep an open mind, 'kay?"
Raid's eye twitched. "... Sure. What do you want us to do with the mare, then?"
At this, Star's expression fell flat. "Good question. It would be most convenient if she just quietly tagged along and didn't get in the way..."
"VERY unlikely, from Grapes' description," Raid interjected.
"... Well, she's probably a friend or lover and I don't want to upset the stud too much. Invite her to join us too, I suppose. Who knows; maybe she'll be more susceptible to the promise of some easy bits. But don't kill her unless you know you can get away with it," Morning Star commanded with a shrug.
"Got it, Boss," the stallions said in unison before heading for the exit.


"Good luck, boys," Morning Star blew a kiss toward the bandits while they walked out, and then slipped back into her bed, rolling over onto a satin pillow. "I'll be waiting for you, Havoc. I can't WAIT to see what you're capable of!"