Angels Among Us

by Dash32


Chapter 6

After everyone got outside they began their training, beginning with push-ups, sit-ups and other forms of exercise. After stretching out their limbs they lined up in formation as per Admiral Stones orders.

“Before you begin your training I will take you on a ten mile journey to Hell around this camp! You will not like me on this journey! You will not make a fucking sound while we are on this journey! The only words I should hear out of your worthless mouths are repeated after me! Do you maggots understand that?!

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“Bullshit I can't hear you! I SAID DO YOU UNDERSTAND MAGGOTS?!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!”

“If I hear one single semblance of a complaint out of ANY of you along this hike I will make you ALL sprint back to your barracks naked as a jaybird and make you do it AGAIN!! Do you maggots understand?!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“If any of you worthless pieces of garbage fall down on this journey, we will not wait for you! You will get back up and pick up the pace or be left to die! Do you understand that?!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“Repeat after me! Mama and papa were laying in bed!”

The recruits all sounded off in unison.

“Mama and Papa were laying in bed!!”

“Mama rolled over, this is what she said!”

“MAMA ROLLED OVER, THIS IS WHAT SHE SAID!!”

“Ah, gimme some!”

“AH, GIMME SOME!!”

“P.T.!”

“P.T.!!”

“Good for you!”

“GOOD FOR YOU!!”

“Good for me!”

“GOOD FOR ME!!”

“Mh good!”

“MH GOOD!!”

“Up in the morning to the rising sun!”

“UP IN THE MORNING TO THE RISING SUN!!”

“Gotta run all day 'til the running is done!”

“GOTTA RUN ALL DAY 'TIL THE RUNNING IS DONE!!”

“Al-Baghdadi is a son of a bitch!!”

“AL-BAGHDADI IS A SON OF A BITCH!!”

“Got the blueballs, crabs and the seven year itch!”

“GOT THE BLUEBALLS, CRABS, AND THE SEVEN YEAR ITCH!!”

As they all sound off, both Applejack and Rainbow Dash struggled not to laugh at the lyrics to the silly song. They managed to keep it under control.

After three hours of nonstop jogging Admiral Stone finally stopped.

“Alright that's enough!”

The recruits stopped and struggled to catch their breaths. Only Applejack and Rainbow had barely noticeable signs of fatigue.

“You all are the sorriest excuses of infantry I have ever fucking seen! My eighty-four year old mother can jog faster than you scumbags!”

After looking around a bit, he notices something.

“Where the fuck is Private Tardo?! Where is that fat ass shit stain?!!”

Private Pussypuffs spoke up.

“SIR, HE FELL BEHIND, SIR!!”

“What the fuck do you mean he fell behind Private Pussypuffs?!!”

“SIR, HE COULDN'T KEEP UP AFTER THE LAST TWO THOUSAND YARDS, SIR!!”

“Private Pussypuffs have you not heard of the phrase No Man Left Behind?!”

“SIR, I HAVE, SIR!!”

“Then why on Gods green fucking earth would you leave his fat ass behind?!!”

“SIR, I WAS ONLY FOLLOWING ORDERS, SIR!!”

“You are a disgusting piece of shit Private Pussypuffs!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!”

Admiral Stone looked behind and saw Private Tardo struggling to make it to the group. He clenched his jaw and sternly walked up to the struggling man.

“PRIVATE TARDO WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!!”

“Sir!...I...got tired...Sir!!” He said between heavy breaths, his shirt dark and damp with sweat. His face looked like it'd turned into a waterfall.

“YOU GOT TIRED, ARE YOU SHITTING ME, PRIVATE TARDO?!!”

“S-Sir, n-no Sir!!”

“Private Tardo you had best square your ass into shape before you find my size thirteen shoe up your fat ass!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!”

Rainbow Dash and Applejack silently watched this. Only they had made it through the hike without totally soaking themselves with sweat. Private Tardo eventually made it up to the group and stood at attention. Admiral Stone walked to the front of the group, catching their attention.

“The next part of your exercise is the obstacle course! If you maggots cannot make it through this course there is no way in the Devil's Hell you are going to make it on the battlefield! You will go up two at a time and make it through this course before the next two proceed! We will do this over and over again until you ladies feel like your arms and legs are about the fall off your body and crawl up your asscracks! Do you maggots understand that?!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“Go! Private Johnson, Private Dickweed! You're first!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!” They both yelled before quickly climbing up the first obstacle, a rope climb leading up to a platform at the top with another rope on the other side to rappel down.

After they quickly covered the obstacle it was time for two more to go over.

“Private Dash! Private Apple! You're up! Move it you fuckin' milkshakes!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!”

Both girls quickly ran up to the ropes and scaled them like a spider retracting up its web. They both made it to the top in less than ten seconds and ran across the top of the platform before sliding down the rope.

“OUT-FUCKING-STANDING!! YOU SCUMBAGS CAN LEARN A LOT FROM OUR NEWBIES!! THATS EASILY THE FASTEST IVE EVER SEEN ANYONE SCALE THIS OBSTACLE! NEXT TWO PRIVATES, QUICKLY! GET OVER THIS GODDAMN OBSTACLE, MOVE IT!!”

Two more privates quickly scaled the obstacle before two more start climbing the rope. Shortly after Private Pussypuffs and Private Tardo stepped up.

“NEXT TWO PRIVATES, QUICKLY, HURRY UP, GET UP THERE!! PRIVATE PUSSYPUFFS, ARE YOU A KILLER?”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“Let me hear your war cry!”

“AAAAAGH!!!”

Admiral Stone directed his attention to Private Tardo, who was struggling to make his way up the rope.

“QUICKLY, GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER THERE, PRIVATE TARDO!!”

Private Tardo tried to climb up the rope, only to slip and fall on his back before trying again.

“OH, THAT IS RIGHT, PRIVATE TARDO!! DON'T MAKE ANY FUCKING EFFORT TO GET TO THE TOP OF THE FUCKING OBSTACLE!! IF GOD WANTED YOU UP THERE HE WOULD HAVE MIRACLED YOUR ASS UP THERE, WOULD HE NOT?!!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!!”

“GET YOUR FAT ASS UP THERE, TARDO!!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

Again Private Tardo struggled to make it to the top.

“WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU ANYWAY?! I BET YOU IF THERE WAS SOME PUSSY UP THER ON TOP OF THAT OBSTACLE, YOU COULD GET UP THERE, COULD YOU NOT?!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!”

“YOUR ASS LOOKS LIKE ABOUT TWO HUNDRED POUNDS OF MELTED RUBBER, TARDO!! DO YOU KNOW THAT?!!”

“Sir, yes, Sir!!”

“GET UP THERE, FATBOY, QUICKLY, MOVE IT UP, MOVE IT UP, VALE, MOVE IT UP!! YOU CLIMB OBSTACLES LIKE OLD PEOPLE FUCK!! DO YOU KNOW THAT, PRIVATE TARDO?! GET UP THERE!! YOU ARE TOO SLOW!! MOVE IT, MOVE IT!! PRIVATE TARDO, WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT FALL DOWN!! THAT WOULD BREAK MY FUCKING HEART!! QUICKLY, UP AND OVER, UP AND OVER!!

Once again, he struggled to climb up the rope.

“WELL WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE YOU WAITING FOR, PRIVATE TARDO?! GET UP AND OVER, MOVE IT, MOVE IT, MOVE IT!!”

Private Tardo made it halfway up the rope before he stopped, gasping for breath.

“ARE YOU FUCKING QUITTING ON ME?! WELL, ARE YOU?! THEN QUIT YOU SLIMEY FUCKING WALRUS-LOOKING PIECE OF SHIT!! GET THE FUCK OFF MY OBSTACLE!! GET THE FUCK DOWN OFF MY OBSTACLE, NOW!! MOVE IT!!”

Private Tardo slowly climbed down the rope and walked to the back of the line.

“I AM GOING TO RIP YOUR BALLS OFF SO YOU CANNOT CONTAMINATE THE REST OF THE WORLD!! I WILL MOTIVATE YOU, PRIVATE TARDO, IF IT SHORT-DICKS EVERY CANNIBAL ON THE CONGO!!”

After two hours of going through the obstacle course Admiral Stone ordered that they go on another jog. Once again Private Tardo fell behind, leaving Private Pussypuffs to help him.

“WHERE THE FUCK IS TARDO?!”

“Sir, back here, Sir!!”

Admiral Stone looked back to see Private Pussypuffs assisting Private Tardo with the jog. Tardo was moving at more of a tired walk than a jog.

“PICK 'EM UP AND SET 'EM DOWN, TARDO, QUICKLY, MOVE IT UP! WERE YOU BORN A FAT SLIMEY SCUMBAG, YOU PIECE OF SHIT, PRIVATE TARDO, OR DID YOU HAVE TO WORK ON IT?!! MOVE IT UP, QUICKLY, HUSTLE UP! THE FUCKING WAR WILL BE OVER BY THE TIME WE GET OUT THERE, WONT IT, PRIVATE TARDO?! MOVE IT!! ARE YOU GOING TO FUCKING DIE, PRIVATE TARDO?! ARE YOU GOING TO DIE ON ME?! DO IT NOW, MOVE IT UP, HUSTLE IT UP, QUICKLY, QUICKLY, QUICKLY!! DO YOU FEEL DIZZY?! DO YOU FEEL FAINT?! JESUS H. CHRIST, I THINK YOU'VE GOT A HARD ON!!”

Rainbow Dash and Applejack managed to finish before anyone else and watch the rest of the recruits complete the jog. After everyone crossed, Admiral Stone stood in front of them again.

“LISTEN UP YOU SCROUNGY LITTLE TURDS!! WITH THE REMAINING TIME WE HAVE WE WILL DO EXERCISES IN PLACE!! NOW DROP TO YOUR FACES AND GIVE ME THREE HUNDRED!! NOW!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!”

Everyone immediately got down to the ground and started doing push-ups. For the next few hours they did various pull-up, sit-up, and push-up related exercises. Finally after what felt like an eternity, training was done.

“ALRIGHT! LUNCH TIME YOU FUCKING MILKSHAKES!! GET OUT OF HERE!! DISMISSED!!”

“SIR, YES, SIR!!”

Admiral Stone gave them a salute, to which they all immediately returned before turning on their heels and walking toward the mess hall.

Rainbow Dash rubbed her sore joints.

“Ugh...I thought it would never end...”

Applejack nodded in agreement.

“Yeah...Admiral Stone was bein' a little rough on Private Vale dontcha think?”

“Maybe a little. But he's just trying to toughen him up. Can't have wimps in the military...”

“Ah guess so...”

“Anyway...lets get something to eat...”

“Yeah. Ah'm gettin' pretty hungry myself...”

“Alright. Let's go!”

And with that the two girls made their way to the mess hall.