“Ahhhh.” Mint stretched as she stepped out into the afternoon sun. She cracked her wings, something I’d only previously seen as part of Dash’s showboating. “Y’know, excitement is great and all, but sometimes it’s just nice to do ordinary things.”
Coming out of the Seapony at this time of day felt very strange, despite the fact that it was also an inn that I had personally utilized. I thought back to my return from Filly and why I hadn’t made such an observation then. I supposed such a concern was pretty trivial compared to everything that had happened prior. Maybe that’s what it felt like to be one of the drunks who stumbled upstairs to pass out in the room before finally stumbling back out midday. Minus the drug withdrawal—or maybe not.
Shaking myself out of my reverie, I followed Mint out onto the street and quirked an eyebrow. “Criminal investigation is ordinary?”
“A lot of ponies back at the barracks would say so.” She winked as she flashed me a grin. “Besides, no knives or thugs seems pretty ordinary to me.”
I kept walking, leading the way toward Night’s house—and our base of operations. “I think Birch might qualify as a thug.”
“Yeah, but not that kind of thug.” Mint squinted down the road, as though sizing up an invisible Birch. “He hasn’t taken a swing at anypony yet.”
“Yet,” I said, almost more out of reflex than anything. However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was a legitimate concern.
Mint stopped and turned to me. “What, you think he might?”
“Can’t say for sure. I mean, he’s more of the slimy, weasley type, but he did break into Mahogany’s apartment in a fit of rage. I wouldn’t put it past him.”
“Hah, I’d like to see him try to start something in the courthouse.” She swung her forehoof at the air. “He’d have Guard all over him faster than a Canterlot noble on the latest trend.”
I laughed. “That would be pretty good. We have to get that far first, though.”
“Shouldn’t be too hard,” she said. “That Barkeep guy gave us a pretty long list.”
It was true. When I’d inquired with Barkeep, I hadn’t expected him to rattle off the names of what must have been enough people to fill half the bar that night. And yet, these were typical bar patrons we were talking about. “Yeah. Still, I think we may run into a few memory or coherence issues.”
Mint smirked. “Nothing I haven’t dealt with back in Cloudsdale. Besides, isn’t this your turf?”
“Well, yes. I do recognize most of the names, but I can’t say I know more than a few particularly well. Most of those are from the weather team, but they’re also notorious lushes. Getting anyone to accept their testimony might be difficult.”
“That is a problem.” She gave me a nod and a look that told me she completely understood. “But, speaking from experience, you might have to sift through ninety-nine duds, but the hundredth will have their story straight.”
“Here’s hoping, then.” I had to admit that was a pretty good argument, even if it didn’t guarantee anything. The good thing was that we weren’t in a huge rush, so taking a couple nights to cover the entire list wouldn’t be a problem.
Mint glanced at me again. “What about Mahogany?”
“We’ve got a few mutual acquaintances on the list. Otherwise, I’m really not sure if he knows anyone else. It’s probably easiest if we just show him before we head out tonight.”
---
“You’ve gotta be kidding me.” I hadn’t expected to feel so on edge tonight, but perhaps that’s just an inevitability of having dealings in the back room. The stallion, a well-groomed yellow pegasus with reddish-brown mane, named Horizon Ray, seemed unfazed—instead deciding to waggle his eyes.
“What? What’s wrong with a kiss? A heroic act deserves a heroic reward.” He grinned in a way I wager he thought was seductive.
I’m not afraid to admit that his was a rather pleasing physique, one I may have checked out a couple times in the past. Perhaps that was why, despite being well educated on things being more than they appear, I was taken extra aback. I kept my expression level, but when that failed to deter him, I glared across the table. “Heroic acts generally don’t involve trying to take advantage of a mare.”
Horizon Ray pulled back, pressing his forehooves to his chest, as though I’d just stabbed him with my wingblade—not that he knew I carried one. “That hurts, Dusky. I’m just asking for a kiss.”
I shook my head. “This isn’t my first night at the bar, Horizon Ray. I know what people expect to follow a kiss. You know I’m spoken for.”
“Whatever. I’m out of here.” He, rather forcefully, shoved his chair back and trotted for the door. He didn’t so much as turn around, yet still made a point of stopping, hoof still on the door handle, to spit out, “Enjoy your dumb little investigation.”
As the door closed, I rubbed my hooves against my temples and sighed. The whole conversation had been looking so good before then, especially since Horizon Ray was the last person on my share of the list. I sorely hoped Mint and Mahogany had had better luck with their interviews.
There was a light triple rap at the door. I looked up in time to see Mint enter. Concern filled her face. “Hey, uh, you doing okay?”
As Mahogany filed in behind her, I sighed. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just learned some very uncomfortable truths about one of my coworkers, that’s all.”
Mint raised an eyebrow. “Should I ask?”
I shrugged. “I’m sure it’s probably something you’ve come across at least once on duty. I think he knew something, but he wanted ‘favours’.”
“Dirty bastard.” Mahogany muttered. “I bet my dad paid him off to get in the way.”
“Let’s not get paranoid here.” I shook my head. “I mean, it’s possible, but that’s not really the vibe I was getting. This guy just seemed like more of an opportunist.”
Mint nodded. “Besides, when somepony gets paid off, they’re generally paid to be quiet and pretend they don’t know anything. This pony sounds like he was clearly giving away that something was going on.”
“Still,” Mahogany grumbled. “It’s his fault Dusky had to go through that.”
I wondered where that fire had suddenly come from, to which I sadly concluded that, while he had become accustomed to his father’s antics, he was spurred into action when it caused one of us grief. “I appreciate the thought, Mahogany, but I’m fine, really. Let’s concentrate on bringing him down.”
“Did you have any luck with anypony else?” Mint asked.
“Unfortunately, no.” I shook my head. “Several others remembered enough fragments that it might have been useful if their imagination hadn’t taken over. I don’t know if it was the drink or they were simply not all there, but one was convinced Birch was a rhinoceros. Another said she knew he was bad news because she was part of a secret organization called S.T.Y.L.E. that had been opposing him for years because his furniture design is terrible. And a third insisted that Birch had threatened to unleash thirty trained attack Ursas if Mahogany didn’t give in.”
Mahogany snickered. “Wouldn’t be surprised if S.T.Y.L.E.’s the real deal. Some of his stuff is butt ugly.”
“I’m glad it’s at least worth some entertainment value.” I met his smirk.
“The rhinoceros story seems to be going around, but looks like you got all the other funny stuff.” Mint gave me a sympathetic look, nonetheless. “I got a lot of ponies who couldn’t remember key details. Half the ponies I talked to couldn’t give me a proper description of Birch and then half of them gave me blank stares when I brought out the photo. Misplaced timeframe is another one. Some uncertainty is a given, but getting anypony to even settle on an hour was tough. For a town full of ponies who live next to the Everfree, they sure are absent-minded.”
I gave Mint a sheepish look. “Truth be told, most ponies would prefer to pretend it doesn’t exist and go on their way. Only a small subset of the weather crew has to deal with it on a daily basis.”
“Hey, don’t forget me,” Mahogany grumbled. “Anytime I have to do deliveries out that way, I have to skirt the edge of the Everfree to make good time.”
Mint blinked. “I hope there’s good hazard pay for that.”
“Hazard pay?” Mahogany scoffed. “What hazard pay?”
“Okaaaay, we might be looking at another case after this one.” Mint shook her head. “Anyway, none of this is really good on its own. Luckily, we have Barkeep, but I’d really like us to have more than one witness. With a stronger baseline, we can start including a few of the least-unsure ponies.”
“I’ve got one.” Mahogany’s face contorted a little. “I think.”
“You think? What’s the catch?” I asked.
“It’s Lily.” Mahogany sighed.
“Lily Valley, right?” Mint tilted her head. “What’s wrong with her?”
“She has…” I tried to think of a way of putting it that wasn’t especially unflattering, as Lily was probably one of the most harmless people in Ponyville. “...a reputation for overreacting. I’m a little surprised that someone like her would come to the bar, but given how high strung she is, I suppose I could see her going for a drink or three.”
“Oh, is that it?” Grinning wide, Mint leaned forward. “Then we just use a little technique I like to call good cop, good cop.”
“Er, what?” I asked.
“Isn’t it good cop, bad cop?” Mahogany scratched his head. “‘Cause I think that’ll just make things worse.”
“No, no.” Mint waved her hooves. “Good cop, good cop works just like it, but it skips the bad part, since the interviewee already feels uncomfortable. We just have extra ponies to work extra hard at reassuring them. We butter ‘em up until they’re comfortable with their story, then they won’t seem so hysterical on the stand.”
“That’s… a really weird way of putting it.” With a giggle, I glanced between Mint and Mahogany. “But the logic makes sense. I think we should try it.”