Embracing Chaos Chapter 5
There was a light mummering of chatter coming from around the room as everyone sat waiting for the meeting to start. At first glance they seemed to be a rather eclectic group, made up of ponies of all tribes, some griffons, a minotaur, a couple zebras, and even a yak, but underneath surface appearances they all carried a similar focus; passing on their knowledge to others, to which they had to thank the mare they were waiting for.
Suddenly the doors to the room burst open and a purple blur rushed through them, trailed of flailing papers being flung out in the blur’s path. Soon enough the blur resolved into the form of Headmistress Twilight, a few strands of her mane out of place but otherwise happy looking. “Hello everyone! Sorry for being a bit late, had a few outside issues to deal with before I could get back to work here. I know you all hate being distracted and unable to focus as much as I do.”
Multiple affirmations came from around the room as the Headmistress spread out her notes for the meeting in front of her, taking a moment to hold and release a calming breath. “Okay, is everyone here? Great! Let’s get started then. First off, I want to congratulate you all on an excellent first week of school. Despite a few hiccups here and there we seem to be off to a great start, and I can’t wait to see how much better we all become as time goes on.”
She paused to let the teachers have their moment of saying thanks or trying to wave off the praise. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Chaos Theory smugly wiping a hoof on his jacket, but she elected to ignore him for time being. Not that he was likely to make that easy.
“Secondly, I wanted to get all of your thoughts on how things are progressing so far, as well as any ideas you might have to make your jobs easier and so on. The floor is open, no need to raise your hooves or other appendages to get called on.”
Several small laughs came from around the room before a giant of a yak stood up. Twilight noted that his hair was slightly less tangled and messy than usual, though his beard was as mussed as ever. “Yes Professor Wildbeard?”
“Ah was jus wondern’, Miss Headmistress, would it be ahrigh’ to take some of the kids out intah that forest to see some ah the animals? Best way tah learn is practical as Ah always say.”
Twilight blinked, mentally translating the yak’s thick Scoltish accent. “You mean out into the Everfree? Well… I know the forest has calmed down a lot over the last few years, but some of those creatures are still very dangerous and don’t take well the presence of others.”
The yak laughed, a deep, booming belly-shaking sound that reverberated in the table, the chairs, the very walls it seemed. “Ah ain’t worried much ‘boot that Miss Headmistress. Ah been wranglen’ with these kind ah beasties fah longah than most of them younguns been alive. If anything can keep ‘em safe out there, it’s me.”
Twilight took another look at the 10 hoof tall mountain of meat, muscle and fur that was Wildbeard and stared at his equally wild, confident eyes… and almost believed him.
“I’ll… take the idea into consideration for now. Maybe if we can rustle up some extra Guard platoons to go with you on any… ‘field trips’ then we can work something out.”
The yak smiled broadly and settled back down in his seat with surprising gentleness.
“Okay, then,” Twilight said as she gazed around the rest of the table. “Anyone else?”
A stone gray earth pony stood and coughed flatly. “We could use some more rune stones. We don’t have enough.”
Twilight quirked her head at her frie… friend of a friend and asked, “Couldn’t you just get some from your family’s rock farm, Maud?”
Maud shook her head slowly and minimally. “No. Mom and Dad don’t do hoof outs, not even to family. If you want some, you have to buy them, and you control the budget Headmistress.”
Okay… Twilight thought as she processed this new information. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised the Pie family would be so steady on that front. They are very traditional after all.
“Alright then Maud, I’ll see about contacting your parent’s to set up a contract for the school. Also, you can just call me Twilight you know, no need to call me Headmistress every time.” She looked around the room and announced, “Same goes with all of you as well. We’re all friends and colleagues here, no need to be quite that formal.”
The room spoke their agreements and assurances, while Maud blinked in her typical glacial fashion. “I should warn you, our rocks are very expensive. High quality demands high price.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” Twilight said, even as she mentally wondered, How expensive could some special rocks be anyway? Surely they can’t be that pricey right?
Chaos Theory suddenly started laughing, plodding his hoof on the table as he tried and failed to cover his guffaws. Twilight looked at him in confusion and suspicion. Why do I feel like he knows something I don’t? Wait, what am I saying? It’s Discord. Of course he knows something I don’t. He always does.
“Something you wanna share with us Mr. Theory?” A brown coated pegasus asked.
Theory finished his chuckles and waved away the question, saying, “Nothing of import at the moment my good stallion. Just enjoying a bit of future schadenfreude.”
The pegasus blinked confusedly, and he wasn’t the only one. “A bit of what?”
“But never mind that, let’s move on with our other concerns shall we? For example, what month does the hoofball season start pray tell?”
Twilight froze as she tried to keep her face as a blank mask. Oooooh Discord I am SO going to get you back for this later…
Several of the teachers murmured to each other excitedly at the mention of the sport, and the brown pegasus in particular perked up. “Actually, he has a point there. We haven’t heard anything on who’s doing what in the sports department so far. What’s the word on that, Sparkle?”
Twilight smiled, a weak, fragile expression that she forced herself to maintain rather than let her eye twitch as she knew it desperately wanted to. “Aaaah yes… The sports department. It’s, uh… It’s… in progress.” Her gaze darted about the room, trying to find something to distract them all from the current topic, and instead her eyes fell on Theory, who was sitting there with the most smugly satisfied but encouraging grin she’d had the misfortune to see. To say that his expression did little to help her mood would be like saying Nightmare Moon had been a bit bossy.
Payment in FULL, Discord. In. Full.
The pegasus smiled hopefully - darn his focus on this! - and asked, “So… if it’s in progress, then does that mean that there’s any openings for the coach posi-”
His words, and everyone’s breath, was cut off by the main door exploding open to unleash a miniature sonic boom right over their heads. Everything not tied or nailed down went flying about, including some of the lighter professors, as a cascading prism of trailing energy bounced off the walls and rebounded multiple times before losing energy.
Eventually the chaos - not caused by the master himself despite him being in the room, Twilight noted sardonically - settled and everyone hunted for their bearings as the last few pieces of hurricane-twisted paper fluttered to the floor. Standing next to Twilight’s chair at the head of the table was a very proud-looking Rainbow Dash, standing at parade attention with a very satisfied grin on her face.
“I’ve got it all done, Twilight,” she reported. “All the rosters are set to be filled, equipment is being set up in the meeting hall as a gym, one of the fields outside the castle is getting prepped for goal posts and stands, locker rooms are being built into the unused East Wing, and the school is registered with the Equestria Games Department for full authorization of school teams and leagues. All that’s left is to pick out the positions, and I’m sure you already know who is the best equipped to handle the coach posi-”
“RAINBOW DASH?! What are you doing here?”
Twilight, still trying to fix her horribly tangled mane while grabbing her papers up off the floor, looked up to see the brown pegasus staring at Dash with a mix of incredulousness, disbelief, and what almost seemed to be anger.
“DUMBBELL!” Rainbow roared, her happy mood evaporating as she sent back her own glare at the stallion. “What are you doing here?”
“I asked you first Crash!”
“Yeah, well I asked second and I’m the best, so you answer first!”
“Make me!”
“Maybe I should!”
“Knock it off!” Twilight shouted as she slammed her hooves on the table with finality. She glared at the two incessned pegasi, both of whom had actually flown into each other’s faces during their shouting match. “What in Equestria are you two yelling at each other for? For Celestia’s sake, we’re supposed to be working together here as teachers, I can’t have you both fighting for no good reason! Or any reason for that matter!”
“Wait, you’re a teacher here?” both flying ponies shouted at each other. “Since when? Hey, I asked first! No you didn’t!”
“Wow, those two really like fighting,” a griffon professor noted as the two devolved into shouting over the other while Twilight tried to use her magic to separate them. “Back where I’m from if I fought with somegrif like that, one of us would be in the hospital.”
The minotaur next to the griffon huffed as she folded her arms over her chest. “Funny, where I’m from, these two would look like they’re courting each other.”
“Seriously? Pfft, that’s weird.”
“It makes more sense than you’d think actually.”
The pair of them jumped as a tub of popcorn was set on the table in front of them by a yellow aura. The two tracked the magic back to its source to see Chaos Theory leaning back in his chair wolfing down his own popcorn with the most pleased expression. He took a pause from his chowing down to turn to the griffon and minotaur and said with a smile, “I don’t care either way, I’m having far too much fun just watching.”
The pair gave each other a look, shrugged, and reached into the tub for their own bites.
Eventually Twilight got fed up with trying to come between the two fretting fliers and lit up her horn, projecting a field of magic around the both of them that froze them in mid-motion. “That. Is. Enough. Either both of you calm down right now or I will kick you out of this school myself. Understood?”
Twilight relented the time-stop field just enough to grant the two the ability to nod at her, then set them both down on opposite sides of the table. Keeping a steady eye between them Twilight lifted the field as they both landed on the floor, each looking far away from the other.
“Now, I don’t know what problem you two have between each other but I’ll say this right now; shouting at each other is NOT going to solve it, nor is almost coming to blows right in front of all of your peers. Rainbow, I would have expected you to know this already, and Dumbbell, I am disappointed that you would act like that.”
Both ponies wilted under Twilight’s disapproving words, Rainbow in particular hanging her head as her wings drooped to the floor. “Sorry Twilight,” she said.
“Yeah… so am I,” Dumbbell agreed. “I shouldn’t have acted like that just cause… I just shouldn’t have.”
“No, you shouldn’t,” Twilight said, “but we’re not going to focus on that right now. I’ll help you two deal with whatever this issue is later in private, but right now, let’s get back to the meeting.” She sat back primly in her seat to reassert order, then hesitated as she saw nearly everybody else at the table was eating from popcorn buckets. “Where did you all get those?”
“Nowhere,” was the resounding reply from everyone. Everyone but Chaos Theory that is, whose own hooves were empty of any buckets, popcorn filled or otherwise.
Twilight narrowed her eyes at Theory for a moment before deciding to just let it go for now - while adding to her tally of potential get-him-back moments - and focusing her attention on what was important at the moment. “As I was saying before… well, before, the sports department was in progress, thanks to the hard work of my friend Rainbow Dash here.”
Dash smiled weakly at Twilight before turning her gaze away again. Across the table Dumbbell stared shrewdly at her for a moment, then continued listening to Twilight.
“Once I’ve reviewed all the paperwork Dash has for me, I’ll see about posting openings for the various teams, both for players and for coaches. If you want to be coach of one of the sports teams then you will add your name to a list of applicants I provide for you, and I want to be sure everyone who does so is responsible enough to be worth the position.”
Both Dumbbell and Rainbow reacted to that statement, not by shrinking away, but gaining determined looks and tensed expressions. They spared each other a quick glance from across the table, seeing the fire of competition in the other’s eyes and declaring that the game was on.
“Now, are there any further questions on the sports department? Or shall we move on to other topics?”
“I have a question,” a male voice announced.
Twilight looked to the questioner, then sighed internally as she caught the casual smirk on Chaos Theory’s face.
And here we go…
“And what would that be, Mr. Theory?” she asked with well practiced politeness.
“Oh please, no need to be so formal Twilight,” - Twilight resisted the urge to snort - “you may call me Chaos if you wish. As for my question, it is a fairly simple one: what are your feelings on bringing in visiting experts for the purpose of illustrating a particular topic in class?”
Twilight blinked, then blinked again as she had to mentally brace herself for the unexpectedly serious topic. “Um… I suppose that would be perfectly fine to do,” she said, “so long as we plan ahead properly and provide accommodations to any visitors. Did you have anyone in particular in mind?”
Theory’s smile turned the slightest shade darker as he bowed dramatically. “Why indeed I did, Twilight. As you fine folks know, I am currently the professor for magical theory, a great deal of which is so unknown to the common being that there are few experts to be found in some of the more… underutilized fields. Thus, to help provide the best learning experience possible for my students, I would request the chance to bring in a truly knowledgeable fellow on one such topic. The finest expert in the magic of chaos the land has to offer aside from myself.”
Twilight’s eyes widened as she recognized the trap she had fallen into. Oh, don’t you do it Theory. Don’t you say what I know you’re going to say. Don’tdon’tdon’tdon’tdon’t-
“The Spirit of Chaos himself, Discord.”
“You rang?”
A dim fog appeared in the room for an instant before being blown away in a dark flash of bright shadow - what - covering their sight for a moment long enough for the great draconequs to slip into their midst. Everyone stared up at the hovering entity in stunned shock, jaws to the floor and limbs slack. Discord reared upward, towering high so he could look down at all the eyes staring up at him. Once he was sure he had all eyes upon him, he opened his mouth to speak.
“What are you all staring at? Do I have something in my teeth?”
He reached into his maw and pulled out one of his fangs with a pop, then pulling out a golden tooth from within the tooth the same size as the actual tooth.
“Ah, it seems that I did. Now… who was it that requested my presence?”
Chaos Theory stood up and bowed low. “That would be me, my good entity. I am Professor Chaos Theory, and I have been a close studier of your particular brand of magic for many years now.”
Discord smiled and slithered down so that he lay upon the table, curled just enough to not disturb Twilight’s papers but still placed in such a way to block Twilight’s view with his wagging tail.
“Oh? So I have a fan… How delightful.”
Twilight had to resist the urge to gag as Discord and Discord bragged about Discord in full view of an entire room with nobody any the wiser save for her. For all her irritation about being so badly played however, she had to give him props. It was an excellent bit of payback for her ‘nerfing’ him in his professor role.
Which would only make her future plotting against him for her own vengeance all the sweeter.
“As much as I’m sure you two are enjoying your chatting,” Twilight said, interrupting them in the middle of a set of uproarious laughter, “we do have a meeting going on. Perhaps we should get to the point that Mr. Theory was trying to put forth.”
“Oh, of course, Twilight,” both said as the same time, in the same voice.
Twilight felt a hair in her mane twang up in frustration when absolutely nobody else in the room cottoned on at the blatantly obvious clue, but managed to maintain her calm.
“Now, Discord… Mr. Theory had a suggestion that, when he gets to the parts of his course that deal with your particular brand of magic, that you would come in to help ‘demonstrate’ it for his students. Would you be amicable to this, or does that sound too demanding for you?”
By Harmony, Twilight was going to make Discord work for this victory he had obtained. He wouldn’t get to mess with her for free!
“Oh but Twilight, why would I ever turn down the chance to show my skills and usefulness to a receptive crowd? In fact, why wait?”
He’s going to say he’s going to hang around the campus at random now isn’t he?
“Why, I feel like I can contribute to the education of these bright young pupils at any time, so long as it’s not too ‘disruptive’ for the other classes of course.”
Oh yes, hello? This is Twilight, saying that I totally called that. Twilight snickered at herself. At least he didn’t copy my thoughts again this time.
Dumbbell looked between Discord, who was busy listing all the ‘wondrous’ forms of enlightened anarchy he would bring to the school, and Twilight, who was seemingly ignoring everything he was saying. “Um, Twilight, er, that is, Headmistress… Are we sure it’s a good idea to let Discord, the Avatar of Chaos itself, run, er… fly freely around the school?”
Suddenly Discord ceased his pontificating and looked down at the pony princess, as eager to hear her answer as the rest of the classroom seemed to be.
Twilight smiled slightly, taking a moment to put her papers in order - even though they had been perfectly ordered already - letting her silence extend for a bit. Eventually she looked up to the waiting draconequus… and grinned.
“I can see the reason for your concern Dumbbell, but I can assure you that there is no reason to worry. While Discord has been a disruptive influence in the past, I do believe he has grown to be something more than just a mere prankster with phenomenal cosmic power. So yes, I think it’s a perfectly fine idea for Discord to appear on campus sometimes, so long as he behaves himself.”
The rest of the teachers and professors started gossiping immediately as soon as she finished, but Twilight had eyes only for Discord, the only one to notice as his usual cheeky grin was replaced by a small but earnest smile. One she’d seen him wear only a bare few times in the years she’d known him.
Yes Discord, I do trust you, because you’ve proven you can be trusted thus far. So by all means… do. Your. Worst. She smiled and tilted her head at him while winking. Just be reasonable about it, would you please?
Discord said nothing, giving her only a minimal but powerful nod.
Sounds good to me, Twilight. Thank you, for trusting me.
Twilight blinked in surprise at hearing the voice in her head but did not feel too alarmed as Discord did a grand sweeping gesture. “You heard the fair headmistress my fellow educators! I am welcome at any time… and I shall see you all again very, very soon. Til then, tah tah…”
In a reverse of his impressive entrance, all the light in the room seemed to be sucked in towards him, forming a bright and impenetrable ball of shining magic. And then, in a moment to fast to notice, he was gone, and the light was back to where it had been as if it had never moved.
“Well that was exciting,” Chaos Theory said with a slight smirk. “And I have a feeling the rest of the year will be just as entertaining.”
Oh Theory, you have every idea how right you are.
“Indeed it was,” Twilight said vocally while the rest of the room’s occupants were seemingly still picking their jaws up off the floor. “Now then, does anyone else have any thoughts or concerns they’d like to air?”
There was no response, which Twilight was certain had everything to do with them processing the concept of a Discord shaped chaos sword hanging over their heads. Some of them seemed to think it literal, as they kept looking up at the ceiling as if expecting him to be there.
“Alright, then I officially declare this meeting to be completed. Thank you everyone for coming, you may now leave to finish whatever remaining work you have before the weekend. Remember, my office is always open, except for when I’m not there, in which case try and find Spike. I’m sure he can direct you to my whereabouts easily enough. Have a good weekend everybody!”
Slowly, as if moving reluctantly out of a crazy dream, the room began to empty. As they all left, Twilight favored Rainbow and Dumbbell with stern glances, reminding them most keenly that she had not forgotten their earlier outbursts and would be dealing with them in due time. Both shuddered a bit under her gaze but also stared back at her and nodded, acknowledging her decree with their own promise to listen. Finally, the only ones left in the room were herself and Chaos Theory. She sat patiently, waiting to see what he would say but he did not speak. Instead, he merely inclined his muzzle to her, gave her a knowing look, then proceeded out the door.
Twilight watched him go, a satisfied smile on her face. Discord may have ‘won’ this round, but she didn’t really mind. It was a victory that he had earned, even if he had tricked his way to it. She was willing to let him have it, because in the end she knew he deserved it, and the cost to her was minimal. With all the crazy and dangerous things she had been through in her life, having to deal with the occasional bout of anarchy at her school was a small price to pay for rewarding trust well placed.
Besides, she thought to herself as she began making her own way out of the room, it just gives me even more opportunities to get him back. Bring it on Discord. I’m ready to play your game...