An Exercise In Management

by Nameless Narrator


9: Onwards to planning!

Voices on the edge of hearing make me open my eyes. Why am I lying on something really soft? I remember…

...oh, now I remember. The house, the knocked out police pony, the horrible dread stemming from the certainty that we are going to be found and our chitin violently stripped from our flesh either by ponies or by Chrysalis.

“No, stop touching that!”

“But my spear isn’t glowy anymore...”

“Damn it, Three, if you don’t stop shoving that thing there I’ll make a new one just for you!”

“Then I’ll be all glowy! Can I get one now?”

“No, that’s not what It- uuugh, go see if your boss is awake or something.”

“But you sent me to check up on him five minutes ago.”

“Feels a lot longer… just go.”

“On it, miss Eight.”

“And bring me some water.”

“Mhm.”

The undisguised drone trots up the stairs leading to the cellar a moment later, humming to himself.

All inside doors are open, giving me a clear view of the entry hallway, another two open doors leading who-knows-where, and the one Three has just come out of. His ears perk up when he notices me looking at him.

“Miss Eight, miss Eight, the boss is awake!”

“I’ll be right there!”

Three rushes over, tripping over the living room doorstep-

“Whaah?!”

-but he manages to untangle his legs in time not to fall. In the end of his dash, he stops in front of the couch as if nothing happened.

“Miss Eight wants to know-”

“If I’m awake, I know.”

“You’re so smart, boss.”

“I have ears. Good job with leaving the doors open, I wasn’t sure where I was until I heard Eight from downstairs. Speaking of which, what were you two doing there?”

“She put the pony into a cocoon she made.”

“Cool. How did she make it?”

He blushes. I had no idea chitin could turn red.

“Umm, it’s sorta weird… and she looked super sweaty and strange doing it. I can’t explain it right. Sorry, boss. Hey, you can ask if you can watch next time. I caught her doing it by accident and she was really mad, but you should be alright, since you’re the boss.”

“Which holes does it come from? I have to know for some reason, it’s been bugging me since the hive.”

“Umm… all of them?”

“Hurk-!”

“You okay, boss? You look green all of a sudden, almost as green as miss Eight when she was spinning the cocoon and slithering all over the pony.”

“...slithering? Damn my overactive imagination...”
“Aaaaanyway, Three, can you fill me in?”

“Like the pictures? I don’t think crayons can do that to our leg holes.”

“Fill me in on the situation- wait, what pictures?”

“Miss Eight found this paper thing-”

“Book.”

“-book, right. Sorry, boss, I tend to forget a lot when I’m not connected to the hive mind. I don’t know why, since you and miss Eight seem to be fine.”

“You’ll get better with practice, trust me.”
“...because I have no clue if it’s true...”

“Then I’ll try to remember as many things as I can, boss. So, miss Eight found a… colouring book… and she gave it to me.”

“Where? This place doesn’t look as if a foal lived here.”

“They had one in the… police station… waiting room. Hey, boss…?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I, as a drone, like miss Eight? I mean, she’s a single-digit and I’m three and a lot.”

“You can like whoever the heck you want, just don’t get annoying. Anyway, you’re a single-digit now too, so there’s no problem.”

“Am I?”

“Yeah, Three.”

“I thought I just forgot to tell you all the numbers afterwards.”

“No, under my bosshood you are number three. That’s all.”

He turns around on the spot, and bolts back into the cellar.

“Miss Eight, miss Eight, the boss said that now that I’m a low number I can tell you that I like how you’re nice to us, really pretty, and look weirdly great when all slippery and shiny from green goo-”

“My water?”

“-I’ll be right back!”

Running around as if he had energy to spare…

Waaaaait…

He looks decently fed, I feel good too, and Eight is making cocoons which is supposed to be fairly exhausting. All the curtains are drawn and the room is dark, but there are little to no remains of daylight coming through anyway. Did I sleep through the whole day and night?

“Looking presentable, my King.”

“Eigh- hnnnnngh!”

She’s dripping green goo on the carpet, her mane is sticking to her chitin with resin and sweat, I can’t help noticing her long tongue coiling inside her mouth cracked open as she breathes heavily in and out. She looks like a gorgeous mare returning from a night-long rave and smelling extremely… used.

What’s a r-

A large dance party at a nightclub, dance club or festival featuring performances by DJs, who select and mix a seamless flow of loud electronic dance music songs and tracks.

Yep, that’s about what my first thought was… plus some other activities low-rank drones normally don’t get to engage in.

“I’ll go wash myself in a bit-”

She lets her eyelids drop a little.

“-unless you’d prefer me walking like this around you.”

“Go, and you can use Three as a sponge if you want, I’m heaving trouble breathing as it is.”

“It’s fine for me, perhaps you just need to come a bit closer and sniff really deep. This stuff clears out the nostrils just right.”

I cross my hind legs for no reason. No reason at all.

“You know, how do we make goop anyway? The hive mind is kinda quiet about it.”

“I would love to show you, but I’m just so tired… I’ve already gooped all over Truncheon.”

“...suggestive...”

“That’s the name of the pony currently hanging in the cellar, King.”

“Ooof.”

“Although if you want to make it a little more literal-”

“Can you just go have a shower or something, please?”

“I have something crucial to tell you before I go, but I don’t mind you coming with me to kill two griffons with one stone.”

“Get to the point, or I’ll tell Three you’re his real mommy.”

“...you wouldn’t...”

“Imagine all the questions since he can’t reach whatever little shared knowledge we can.”

“...defeated by a drone… how humiliating… hnnngh...”

“Is Three drawing you a bath already or something? I distinctly heard a splash-”

“T- that must have been it, my King. Haha, smart little guy. A- anyway, back to my report.”

“Leave out the innuendos for a second, please. I’m in way over my head and you’re not making it easier to think clearly.”

To my complete surprise, she clicks all four of her hooves together before straightening up and saluting.

“Today, a changeling infiltrator was found lying in a small crater just outside of town. He is badly burned, broken… all over, and unconscious. He wasn’t alone, there have been four more scattered in the vicinity, but he’s the only one alive, or at least he still was when I left the station. Something must have gone terribly wrong in Canterlot, which would explain the hive mind desperately trying to dig into you.”

“And you want to...?”

“With your permission, I’d like to interrogate him and, depending on his information and personality, recruit him.”

“You know, I’d really like to avoid drawing attention, and having a changeling escape just after being caught isn’t the best idea.”

“Think of it like this - the more subordinates you gain, the less focused the hive mind will be on you. You can gain days or even weeks before you break under the pressure.”

“Wait, am I on a timer or something?!”

“Oops, looks like I shared a bit more than I wanted to.”

“...liar, you shared EXACTLY what you wanted to...”

“Heh.”

“Eight, orders! Bath, then get some info out of the captured infiltrator.”

“I hope there’s a good reward for doing all that.”

“I’ll have Three ready with a new shiny collar.”

“...hnnngh...”