//------------------------------// // Optional Chapter 1 - Writer's Commentary // Story: The Gift for the Pegasus: A CMC Mission // by G4PONYTales //------------------------------// The idea for this fanfiction was born between my co-writer and myself (no puns intended). In discussing the show, we often came to the topic about Scootaloo being shown as unable to fly, and came to an agreement that to see Scootaloo fly would be an excellent bucket list item. I started to bring up the idea of writing an MLP fan fiction, because we are both into the creative arts and the show. And then, my co-writer brought up the idea for a plot: A fanfiction where the other two CMC’s help Scootaloo fly. The Making of The Story Chapter 1 - A Mission to Remember In my rough draft, the story took place in season five shortly after “Crusaders of the Lost Mark”, and were happily leaving school right until suddenly, Scootaloo began to question herself for being unable to fly, especially now that she had a somewhat mixed-message cutie mark with a wing and a thunder bolt in it (I always did wonder about what that meant, like if Scootaloo was destined to become an awesome flier someday). However, my co-writer suggested that I make it more current (as in, season seven 2017). He also suggested that I open up with a CMC mission. That was when I started to make things highly complex. I got a bit carried away, and opened up another rough draft which featured Visual Art, a character who I literally created at the last minute. Similarly with Diamond Tiara, this character would come to question the way he was brought up, while wondering why he doesn’t have his cutie mark yet, but my co-writer said “not too complicated!” So, I made the final draft about Chipcutter, a background pony who appeared in the season seven episode “Forever Filly”. From here, my co-writer took over, turning the opening part into a daydream Scootaloo happened to be having while dozing off during a mission wrap-up. From here on out, the rest was my idea to have Scootaloo, in the midst of self-struggle, attempt to fly before encountering reformed Diamond Tiara. The latter idea came from both of us, who always questioned why Diamond Tiara became a background character after her reformation. Chapter 2 - Encountering Reformed Rival With a better idea from my co-writer about what a reader would want in my fanfiction (hopefully we got it right!!), I wrote the entire chapter including the synopsis. However, I found it a very, very hard chapter to write. I rewrote it several times. The first time, my imagination ran away with me a bit and I wrote a chapter where Scootaloo eagerly invites Diamond Tiara to the clubhouse, but the other two CMC’s convince her quietly that they still can’t fully trust Diamond Tiara and therefore influence Scootaloo to turn against her and say she’s not welcome, provoking Diamond Tiara to spout out hurtful words about Scootaloo’s inability to fly and she, in turn, is set into a deeper depression.  Long story short, I love drama. Then, my co-editor brought up that it might be too confusing, that Scootaloo would invite Diamond Tiara into the clubhouse and all of a sudden go against her (Not to mention that they would be against Diamond Tiara despite knowing she is reformed). It can happen if someone is in such a deep depression they can’t make decisions, but I couldn’t help but agree that the plot was getting too complicated, once again. So instead, I took a simpler approach. Diamond Tiara is let into their circle, just to sit out on the CMC  meetings. And Scootaloo starts to feel like having her old enemy around is further enforcing her dark feelings. From here, I developed an intention to develop a subplot where the former-school bully and handicapped victim help each other out of their depressions from self-hatred. Chapter 3 - The Start of Shadow This chapter was easier to write, but I didn’t find it that… exciting to write. At this point of the story, Scootaloo’s friends began to notice her dark thoughts and she herself was becoming more tuned into her flashbacks. It was a chapter with such a flat plot, that all you can do is drag on the dialogue until you get to the exciting part (the nightmare - mua ha ha ha!) This chapter was also the most forgettable for me. Like, the plot was so flat that while writing it, I was thinking “time to get on with things already!” and while preparing a commentary a few weeks later, I thought: “What was that chapter about again? I need to skim over it…” One thing I did enjoy was writing about the way Scootaloo’s friends can read her like a book - s a matter of fact, they’ve known each other for years and are incredibly close friends literally destined to be together. So it was very enjoyable to write about the friendship between the CMCs, and how Scootaloo’s friends begin to truly feel concern for her, while Scootaloo truly begins to struggle with her inner demons. Chapter 4 - The Nightmare This chapter is when I truly became invested into writing the story. I don’t think I am the only one who enjoys writing bad dreams the most. Dreams are powerful because they reflect the deepest feelings hidden in your subconscious, despite your attempts at hiding them in the waking world. That is exactly the situation with Scootaloo: She feels terrible that she can’t fly, and while she doesn’t hate Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon she is still plagued by memories of them tormenting her and she, as a handicapped target for their bullying, subconsciously fears having them around to make fun of her even if they are reformed. I purposely melded the part with Rainbow Dash to the part with Scootaloo being bullied at school because that’s exactly what dreams do: Nothing makes sense, and stories meld into each other.  That is why Scootaloo did a crazy stunt to make herself fly, one she probably wouldn’t do in real life - and then attempt a sonic Rainboom knowing she wouldn’t be able to fly, only to fall onto the school grounds to be made fun of. And in the end, she can’t fly away to safety. Finally, adding Princess Luna was my idea, in order to add a satisfying twist to the story: Scootaloo is destined to fly, and her friends are destined to help her do so, because it is in all of their destiny to help themselves and other ponies. Chapter 5 - Inner Explanation This must have been one of my favourite chapters to write, because it was the first so far to rely so heavily on drama, emotion, and the deep subject of reaching out to your friends and confessing to them, and yourself, that you need help. Scootaloo’s dream has gotten her to realize what she must do, so she finally gathers the courage to call for an emergency meeting and confess. I have some experience of gathering the courage to ask for help and then waiting all day for that moment when you will have to open yourself up to someone else and trust them to watch you do so, and therefore I channelled some of my experience into Scootaloo’s nervous feelings and hayward anticipating thoughts. The First Draft At the part where Scootaloo confesses that she wants to fly, the emotion escalated fast. It involved her suddenly breaking down and sobbing that she longed more than anything to fly, until she couldn’t stop crying and her two friends embraced her, and then Sweetie Belle began to cry because she is highly sensitive and cries for other ponies (that scene is inspired by a similar scene  in One Bad Apple), and when her friends say they will help her Scootaloo all of a sudden cheers up, and they all do that thing where they put their hooves in the middle and say “one, two, three… CRUSADERS! That last part was added on account of my being aware how dramatic this scene was getting, and how it needed to become uplifting. Co-editor's comment: Emotion is over-exaggerated and ends too abruptly. The Final Draft This was less emotional, but still heartwarming, and still very enjoyable to write. From here, I decided to keep the part about Sweetie Belle being highly sensitive, and make her highly sympathetic of Scootaloo’s feelings while Applebloom is more tactful. I think that is quite similar to their personalities, because Sweetie Belle is highly emotional and sympathetic (again, she cried for Applebloom in One Bad Apple), and Applebloom is the sister of the element of honesty, so I can see her being more honest, grounded, and direct like her sister. Chapter 6 - A Finicky Operation This chapter involved more brainstorming of ideas on how the CMCs would help Scootaloo fly. It was also meant to be the part where Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon come into the scene, and say that they want to help. I actually have very little to say about this chapter. It was interesting to write because it involved a lot of story and plot development. I attempted to put less emphasis on emotion and more on the plot’s progression and transformation into helping Scootaloo fly. Chapter 7 - Accepting Assistance This chapter was also very easy to write. It involved a more consideration for the relationship between the characters, and the reformed personalities of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. The plot was very basic, but still interesting to write, because it provided more growth of the story’s sub-plot to  include Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon - more specifically, resolving the conflict once and for all between the CMCs and their former rivals. Chapter 8 - Lessons with Rainbow Dash This chapter gave me the opportunity to fully include Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon into the mix, and have them encourage flying lessons. This supports the idea of Scootaloo needing support from her friends, and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon being effective contributors to the mission. Therefore, here was an opportunity to tie the two subplots closer together, and further develop the purposes for Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon existing. This chapter involved more thinking, because I needed to actually live in the story. As in, I needed to literally ask myself: “What are flying lessons from Rainbow Dash like?” I took into consideration reasons why Scootaloo can’t fly; her wings are small, and/or they don’t work well enough to fly. In addition, she was shown several times throughout the show to instinctively try to fly despite knowing she couldn’t (Ponyville Confidential, For Whom the Sweetie Belle Toils, Flight to the Finish). Therefore, I included that into Rainbow Dash’s lessons, because you need to do something in order to achieve it. I knew that lessons with Rainbow Dash would have to fail, because the story can’t end too quickly. Therefore, my next step was to conduct an idea as to why, and how, this plan failed. Then I decided it was simply because Scootaloo knows how to fly, but can’t because of her wings. She wants it to be a different reason but, unfortunately, that is the truth. Chapter 9 - Different Ideas This chapter was originally called “Magical Assistance”, because it was originally going to be about Sweetie Belle beginning to help Scootaloo with her magic. However, I wanted to include some more story development, including development of the characters and storyline itself, rather than simply jumping to conclusions about Sweetie Belle ultimately making a decision. Therefore, I made this into a chapter of her getting the idea to use magic to help Scootaloo, while Diamond Tiara develops an idea of her own… This chapter also gets more into the perspective and thoughts of Sweetie Belle, who I’ve already stated as the most sympathetic toward Scootaloo and the most desperate to help. That made it easier for me to reason why she would be so eager to use magic. Chapter 10 - Magical Ideas By now, all the characters were tied together, and Sweetie Belle’s plan was fully in order while Applebloom was developing and starting hers’. This is where I thought to myself: “Finally, some action!” From this point on, the story began to branch out into different parts and chapters as it occurred to me to include as many ways that the ponies attempted to help Scootaloo as possible.  For a while during the writing process, I had the intention to include a part with Applebloom wanting to use her earth-pony abilities to help, with the assistance of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. This was for two reasons: I want to see Earth Ponies use their abilities more in general, rather than Sweetie Belle using her magic because she’s a unicorn, while the three earth ponies can do nothing but watch. I wanted to do something with CMC being a different race. I wanted to do something with Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon - in the process, elaborating on their reformed personalities (something that the show NEEDS to include), and their purpose for being in this fanfiction (to help Scootaloo, prove themselves fully reformed, and become accepted as true friends of the CMCs. From here, I created another chapter. Which is… Chapter 10 - Spells and Mishaps. As for figuring out what spells Sweetie Belle would use, here’s the thinking process here: Levitation Spells: This idea was a no brainer; levitation = flying. That said, there must be a reason as to why these don’t work, because the fanfiction could not end without the Earth Ponies playing a part. The idea came to me as I wrote about Sweetie Belle performing the spells from her books: Levitation bubbless sealing out gravity but being popped, spells that wear off or are too hard to perform. Long story short, a true fan of the show easily knows the mishaps of unicorn magic. (Especially after watching episodes like Sonic Rainboom). Growth Spells: This idea played a more important part, due to what it portrays. These spells involved making Scootaloo’s wings grow - a good idea, because that was established in the show (Flight to the Finish) and this fanfiction that her small wings are a primary source of the problem. I came up with this idea when brainstorming rough ideas for spells, and then I got thinking: “If this spell fails, then Scootaloo feels more discouraged because she is so different, that even magic cannot help her wings grow”. I then decided that this would be the straw that broke the camel's back, because the fact that even magic could not make Scootaloo’s useless wings work would not only disappoint her, but lower her self confidence, therefore send her into a deep enough depression for me to write the next chapter. Chapter 11 - CMC Conflict The original chapter for this title was “I Quit!”, an idea from my co-editor. But as this fanfiction grew more dramatic, I decided that a more climatically descriptive title would be more fitting for what this chapter represents. From here, I just went to town; I wrote an emotional argument between the CMCs for not listening to each other, and from here, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were cued to help them out. It was here that I had the last minute idea to have Diamond Tiara, according to Princess Luna, destined to help them, in order to help herself. Chapter 12 - Confrontations and Reparations I added this chapter, which wasn’t in the original story outline that my co-editor had designed in the beginning. The reason is that I decided that after all this drama, there just needed to be a genuine moment of reparation; more specifically, one which would involve Scootaloo finally confronting what has truly bothered her and inhibited her self confidence. I also felt there needed to be a moment where she would officially confront the two reformed rivals, tell them how much they had hurt her, and fully accept them as friends. This would officially resolve the subplot about the two reformed rivals being accepted into the friendship circle. This chapter also demonstrates that Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are symbolic of Scootaloo’s self-hatred and damaged self-confidence for being unable to fly, because they are the ponies who, in Flight to the Finish, brought to light her dark feelings for being unable to fly. I tried not to make the climax to this chapter too rushed or sudden, but if it appeared that way, I apologize. I think climactic endings to stories are always the hardest to write. Overall purpose of the story The epilogue basically speaks for itself. The original purpose of this story was initially for Scootaloo to fly, but it became about Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon becoming fully accepted into the CMC friendship circle something that the show seemingly skipped over. Since there was a them for self-confidence and discovering yourself, I wound up adding Sweetie Belle and Applebloom to the mix, in terms of renewing their self confidence and discovering their complete destinies as as CMC Unicorn, and CMC Earth Pony. The overall theme for this story was self confidence, getting over rough spots, and helping each other to discover who you are. CMC wise, this story came to be about how the CMCs progressed in their skills with collaborating to help other ponies, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon included. It took a lot of work, time, and effort to write this story, and I hope that it shows. I hope that this is an enjoyable story for all you MLP fans out there, and thank you for reading. Hannah Papernick-Yudin Writer of “The Gift for the Pegasus: A CMC Mission”