//------------------------------// // Episode 12: A Prankful Downfall // Story: I Have No Mouth, and I Must Squee ( A Comment Driven Story) // by Down with Chrysalis //------------------------------// As you are being tended to by Fluttershy and staring down a pissed looking Pinkie, theonly thing on your mind is... Greatness942's Comment Okay, so, this is bad. Don't worry, not every change will be like this. I mean, by the time I get my Stand, the show's canon will probably twist and turn more than a silly straw. Okay, let's try and fix this. You immediately begin drawing, carefully keeping the notepad away from your lips, and weaving the tale of Gilda preparing to accost Fluttershy, and you absolutely humiliating both her and yourself at the same time. "...So, wait, you saw that she was going to mess with Fluttershy?" Nod. "So you attacked her and then began...petting her? Or is that an ear scratch?" ...Yes? Confused Nod "And then she kissed you for some reason?" Don't say it like that! Scowling Nod “Is that true Fluttershy?” Pinkie asks. “Oh, well…I don’t know about her trying to hurt me, but I did see him touching her a lot…” Fluttershy! “But then yes his lips and her beak met and…well…but I’m sure it was an accident,” she gestures to the bloody napkins held to your mouth. "...Hmmph. Like that changes a thing! She was still gonna hurt you Fluttershy, or at least hurt your feelings, Skelly’s predictions are hardly wrong. And accident or not, he’s bleeding! What if he dies from it?! Ugh! Somepony’s got to teach her a lesson!" she shouts. You try to hold your arms out to stop her, but she hops off, more huffy than normal. But you don’t let her get too far as you quickly... Sunbro4life's Comment Grab the pink pony and hold onto her tight, “Please don’t struggle so much, your lips still need time to form a scab,” Fluttershy warns, and you try to adjust your grip and hold Pinkie in a manner that doesn't get in Fluttershy's way. That is easier said than done though. "Come on Skelly, we can have hug time later!” Pinkie groans in annoyance and struggles. “I need to teach that no good meanie a lesson for hurting one of my friends!" And that's exactly why I'm stopping you! You groan as you give her a deadpan look. I don't need you going super overboard and causing an even bigger scene or changing the timeline too much! So I'm gonna do something stupid that'll hopefully set things right. With that thought you proceed to start to convulse, but not as exaggerated as you usually do since you need to keep your grip on Pinkie. Your “prediction fit” causes Fluttershy to gasp in worry. "Oh no oh no oh no! He IS being affected by the blood loss! We need to get him to the hospital soon or he'll-" Before Fluttershy could finish she is interrupted by Pinkie's giggling. Fluttershy looks over at the now non-struggling Pinkie in shock, but the pink mare ignores her look entirely. "Silly Fluttershy, Skeletor isn't in any trouble. He's just having a vision because of his super cool awesome psychic powers!" “Psychic powers?” Fluttershy gasps in confusion. “Ya, didn’t Twilight tell you about all the tests she’s been running with him?” Fluttershy shakes her head while you continue to convulse. “Huh, well it’s true. He can see the future. Look, he’s drawing it right now,” she points to you drawing. Luckily the wad of napkins have stuck to your lips. I hope they have lip balm in this world, you ponder as your pencil dances across the page. “Oh my, how fascinating,” Fluttershy mutters and you hear Foxtrot sigh and sag her shoulders. Yes, Good. Be annoyed you fox faced sow! Tis the slow burn of the mighty Skeletor's wrath! Soon you will know the true meaning of mise-wait, no stop! Focus brain! Fake vision now, revenge against Foxtrot later. You basically write down all the pranks Gilda falls for during the party, but toned down versions of them. Your logic being that if you show Pinkie what happens at the party she might be more inclined to not do any pranks. It's unlikely, but you figured it was worth a shot. Hopefully she falls for this. If I'm gonna avoid Gilda’s meltdown, I'll need to know exactly what each prank is gonna do. Might be a good idea to draw Gilda acting out too, might even put Pinkie off the whole idea in the first place. After you finish drawing the cake prank you begin to draw Gilda blowing up and losing her friendship with Dash, but before you can finish Pinkie gasps and says, "Oh Skelletor these pranks are perfect! I was just gonna throw a party and confront her, but these are such good ideas I just have to play them myself! I'll have to amp them up a bit though, these are kinda 'meh' after all." The next thing you know Pinkie is out of your hold and is bouncing down the street with a huge mischievous grin on her face. What the hell? When did she get out of my grip? She looks over to you one more time as she yells, "Thanks for the ideas Skelly! I'm gonna show that mean old griffon who’s boss for sure now!" You extend your arms towards Pinkie with panic in your eyes. Wait no Pinkie! Get back her you misguided pink puffball! Rainbow Dash was the one to cause those pranks, not you! You were supposed to be the one trying to make her happy and appeal to her good nature! Dang it Pinkie get back here! Your thoughts are all for naught as she bounces out of view. You can't help but sigh dejectedly and sink to your knees at this character deviation you’ve caused. Crap, Gilda’s gonna freak out for sure, and Rainbow Dash might blame Pinkie. I gotta fix this somehow… While you wallow in self pity, Fluttershy takes the opportunity to take off your bloodied napkins, and shakily apply a fresh set. Well, at least now Fluttershy isn’t shaking in fear of me, just my blood. My luck can only improve from here. Not even a second after you think that you hear a cough behind you. "So...you claim you were trying to protect the Element Bearer, huh?" Alabaster Foxtrot asks giving you a studious look. You raise an eyebrow and nod, Fluttershy’s hoof following your head movements. "If that’s the case maybe you're not...bad-bad after all…but I'm keepin' my eye on you, though. I’m certain a very public display of affection didn’t need to be implemented, and I certainly haven’t forgotten the Baked Bads…" To her confusion, you suddenly smile smugly. It wasn’t anything lewd, but if you keep thinking I’m not so bad I'll definitely take you off the He-Man list. To stroke my ego further: Your next line shall be "Those weird smiles are still creepy though...stop that!", am I right? "Those weird smiles are still creepy though...stop that!" Alabaster says, which only makes you more smug in your grin. It soon fades though as you grimace at the ointment that Fluttershy suddenly spreads on your cut. “Sorry, Sorry!” she apologizes, “It will only sting for a bit, but it will help keep off infection. Kazuma Michishige's Comment I really hope that getting comically injured isn't going be a pattern in my life now. "There we go," Fluttershy says as she finishes applying the balm, "Let me know if it starts bleeding again okay?" You nod at her and smile. “Oh…canine teeth?” she gasps getting a close look at your teeth. Crap! You panic and shut your lips, wincing from the cut. Please don’t freak out! Please don’t freak- “An omnivore. How curious…” she mutters as she looks at you like you’re some science specimen. Don’t you start giving me those Twilight looks. I’ve had enough of those to last me a- “Well, get better Mr. Skeletor. I uh- I have to round up the ducks and get them to their pond.” She then gives your knee a cautious comforting pat while smiling adorably. You wish you could bask in the adorableness of this gesture, and it takes all of your will power not to just reach down and hug her, Baby steps Skeletor, Baby steps! But I will hug you one day you soft adorable pony! Oblivious to your mental struggle, Fluttershy smiles again and trots away after the ducks. And not a moment too soon, you have some business to take care of, and you don’t need any cute distractions. Now if I was an embarrassed griffon in a pony town, where would I go...? After a few moments of pondering, you realize you have absolutely no idea. You decide your best bet would be to look for her in the direction she flew off to. Before you can get even a few feet however, you are stopped by your escorts. "And where do you think you’re going? Sugarcube Corner and the Library are the other way. You need to be with one of the Elements at all times, remember?" Sighing at Foxtrot’s question you simply show her a page with Gilda and tap it. "You’re going after the griffon?" she asks after giving her partner a confused side glance. At your nod, she asks, "Why? Isn't Ms. Pie taking care of her?" You roll your eyes at this as you show her and her partner the half finished picture of Gilda blowing up at the party. This causes Foxtrot’s eyes to scrunch up. "So the griffon and Ms. Dash get into a fight, what about it? I've been told they’re friends, and friends fight all the time." That is true, but this is a huge fight in front of a bunch of people. Those kind of fights in that situation only ever ends in trouble! That's basic common sense Foxtrot, come on! You facepalm and shake your head in shame. Before you can draw your thoughts though, O'Carroll speaks up, "Maybe he wants to stop the fight from happening ma'am? Friends fight all the time true, but he might be predicting a bad one." Foxtrot looks at O'Carroll in confusion before looking at you as if to confirm what he said was true. Since it is you nod your head. "Okay so you want to stop the fight, I get that. But why do you need to find the griffon now? Wouldn't it just be easier to wait for her to show up at the party or something?" Before you can even think anything O'Carroll beats you to the punch again. "Actually ma'am if he found the griffon now he could try and get on her good side again. Then he could keep her in line during the party like he did now…though hopefully in a less lewd manner." It wasn’t lewd! And dang man! You must be some sort of genius to figure all that out from just my picture! You think giving the stallion an awed look. Even his superior is giving him one. "I uh...took a few deductive reasoning classes during training. Figured it might help me out catching runaway criminals," he mumbles a bit embarrassed by both of your intense stares. “Hmm, guess those classes served you well Oak- I mean, O’Carrol. But I think it’s just making excuses to get close to that griffon again,” she snickers. You roll your eyes and huff which causes her to smirk harder. “Just so long as it’s not in view of everypony under the sun, I won’t judge,” she says clearly judging. “So by all means let’s go find that griffon!" You grumble slightly at her reasons for allowing you to look, but you decide to not look a gift horse (pony) in the mouth and just roll with it. Look out Gilda, here I come! With that thought you set out to look for the griffon with your escorts in tow. A FEW MINUTES LATER Sunbro4life's Comment As you and your escorts look around for Gilda, you don’t have much luck. Dang it Cat Bird! Where are you? It shouldn’t be this hard to find a non-pony in this place. Or so you would have assumed, but you’ve shown quite a few ponies her sketch, and they’ve just shrugged. With both O’Carrol and Foxtrot more closely at your sides, and your Moon Poncho still on display, some ponies have assumed you’re working for the princesses. As if. I bet their pay rates are heavenly…Speaking of princesses, I wonder what Luna is up to? Your mind wanders to the Moon Princess who is the only reason (besides Pinkie) why you’re not stone yet. I hope she's feeling okay. Growing your body back to adult size cannot feel that good I reckon. I’d love just to talk to her when she’s not all nightmared up. I must have done something right for her to think I’m her friend. Hopefully Celestia is keeping her out of politics while she recovers and that none of those prissy nobles are trying to take advantage of her naïve mind. Celestia herself wouldn’t be able to stop me if that happened. Heck, she’d probably join in. No one hurts little Woona without getting a beating dang it! “It’s making that face again Oak,” Foxtrot whispers to her partner. “He’s always making that face Fox. Maybe he’s just hungry,” the stallion whispers back. You will your face to remain blank and push down the misplaced rage you felt. Calm down mind, Celestia would never let that happen. Besides by Pony Halloween, she’ll still be antiquated and reclusive, so I doubt she’d be dealing with any nobles. I wonder when she'll be back to full power? Stupid show not showing her recovery process. Do I really have to wait till Nightmare Night? Your mind begins to make up multiple scenarios involving you and Pinkie and even Spike sneaking into the castle to visit Luna. You can't keep a smile off your face when you imagine the four of you sitting together and eating moon pies. A new friendship should always be celebrated with a pie and a pun after all. I hope they have moon pies here. Which reminds me, what kind of pie can I make/buy/borrow/steal that could also be a pun for dragons? If they have Zebra Cakes in this world, then I’ve got Zecora covered…or would she just feel insulted? Before your mind wanders down another pit of unrelated random thoughts, you hear a lot of sneezing coming from the distance. You look over to the source and see none other than Rarity sneezing her flank off. Ha! Karma strikes again! You should have taken my warning marshmallow, now you'll be sneezing for who knows how long! Nyehaha!!! You would have continued you mental celebration if the seamstress didn’t then start heading your way. You and your escorts share a look, and when she finally gets to you all she opens her mouth to say something, but only a sneeze comes out. She continues to try and say something only to be stopped by her sneezing for a good couple of seconds. Deciding to take pity on the unicorn, and realizing that waiting for her to speak is just wasting time trying to find Gilda, you just tap the picture you’d drawn for her yesterday and giver an 'I told you so' look and shrug. Rarity looks at the picture for a couple of seconds, before turning her face down in embarrassment, her nose scrunching up. You simply pat her on the head and give her a sympathetic smile. Rarity seems to understand as she smiles back before she walks off sneezing all the way. Your smug look returns when she's out of sight as you put your hands on your hips and smirk at Foxtrot. She gives you the stink eye as her partner comes over and bumps her "See ma'am I told you! He can see glimpses of the future!" She glances back to you with a heavy glare as you give a Grinchy grin. Ah karma, always helping me one way or the other as usual. Though what’s with the formal speak? Weren’t you two just whispering nicknames to each other? "What’s with that look?” Foxtrot asks to your glances at both of them. Hmm, I’m keeping my eye on you two. Might possibly be blackmail material for later. Now let’s get back to finding Gilda and th- "Hey...uh monkey thing!" Or she could find us, that works too. You and your escorts turn around to face the griffon. You were expecting an enraged or even annoyed look from her, but instead she just has... Kazuma Michishige's Comment An odd expression on her face. She rubs the back of her head. “Uh…hey,” she mumbles and you wave. “How…how are your lips?” she asks. You gingerly touch them, and they are still sore, but at least they aren’t bleeding. She sees you wince at that. “Yeesh…look, can you and I just talk for a second? What was your name again? Skellington?” “It calls itself Skeletor ma’am,” Foxtrot speaks up, drawing the griffon’s eyes. “And it’s been looking for you actually.” “Okay…cool,” she then looks at you, “Can we just talk by ourselves?” she asks apprehensively. Foxtrot and O’Carroll immediately drop back at that. Why do I suddenly feel abandoned? Now that you two have space, she starts to speak again. "Hey so about that-" She's interrupted by a loud growl from your stomach, scaring away the other ponies who were passing by. You huff in frustration, Come on! Why do you freaking ponies need to be so dang skittish? Gilda chuckles at their antics. "Hungry huh? Hey, I’ve got something we can eat if you want it, though the ponies might not like it.” Then from her saddlebags, she pulls out something glorious. I have seen the heavens! And it is in front of me! Before you is an honest to goodness BLT Sandwich. Emphasis on the bacon in that abbreviation. Gilda smirks, "I knew you'd appreciate this when I saw those teeth of yours. I made it a point to bring some meat here before coming to visit Dash. These wimpy herbivores don’t even have a butcher here. Stuff like this has to be ordered through the mail.” The bacon! It Sings To Me! Let Me Has! LET ME HAS!!! You reach out for the glorious sandwich, but she pulls it back. “Dude, not out in the open like this, the ponies will freak out. Let’s go somewhere more private and we can eat and talk, sound good?” You nod enthusiastically and follow the griffon towards a secluded little alleyway, away from prying eyes. “Okay, here you go, so let’s ta-“ Gilda is interrupted as you snatch the sandwich and take a glorious, heaven filled bite. Your taste buds sing as they taste bacon and turkey after who knows how long. Tears forms in your eyes at the glorious taste of MEAT. Gilda chuckles as you scarf down the deliciousness. “Oh Sweet Celestia, is that pig meat?” you hear Foxtrot gag from the other side of the alley. “It’s not uncommon for Griffons to eat other animals Fox. And the Element of Kindness did call him a Omnivore,” O’Carroll points out. “But still…that poor little piggy…” Poor he may have been, but now he serves a higher purpose!!! Nyeh! You turn to them, interrupting their private conversation and punctuate with another large bite. She frowns even harder at this, even her partner gives a glare and Gilda laughs a little harder. Oh for heaven’s sake. I don’t need glares ruining this moment. You then quickly sketch up a pony and a pig. You then put a check mark next to the pig and nod giving a thumbs up, then put an X through the pony and shake your head no. “I guess he doesn’t eat ponies…” O’Carroll starts, and it’s good enough for you to continue eating. After polishing off the sandwich, you pat your belly in satisfaction. Gilda, you’ve already skyrocketed to my top favorite list. You’re only behind Pinkie, and Luna. “Sooo, now that you’re full, can we talk about earlier?” she asks you. Oh right…awkward stuff… you point to your lips and back and you swear you see her blush for a quick second, "Honestly, I should pummel you for doing something like that. But seeing as it was an accident, I'll let it slide." She puffs up slightly, "Just don't be petting me like that again without telling me!" You blink, confused and she glares at you, "Look, it felt great okay? I'm not going to let that happen only once. This doesn't mean I like you or anything, but I might want the petting to happen again." The glare intensifies, "But not in public, or where anyone can see me!" You nod, still a little confused, Did I just make Gilda a tsundere? Nah, different species and all that. Plus I highly doubt the universe would be so evil as to put me into a cartoon world with both cartoon and anime clichés. My mind wouldn't be able to handle it. Probably just the cat part of her brain responding. For some reason you feel like you just jinxed yourself, but you ignore it since you’ve now got an in for keeping Gilda stable. Denneylaw's Comment If she’s willing to give me a sandwich and not so subtly ask for ear scratches, then I can warn her. Maybe if I use my 'psychic' powers to show Gilda all the pranks heading her way? That way she could just avoid them all and we wouldn't have to worry about Gilda blowing up! It's the perfect plan! But... You stop pulling the notepad out as you think, What if showing her the pranks just gets her even madder than she would have been with the pranks!? That'll cause a whole other incident, not to mention cause me a mega headache trying to do damage control. I can't risk it so long as this is possible. You sigh as you slide the notepad back into your pocket. Come on, there has to be something I can do to avoid Gilda going all nuts at the party. Come on brain, think, think, thin- You swear you hear a light bulb go off as you come up with another idea. Shadow The Fire Spirit's Comment Another wonderful idea. Another wonderfully terrible idea. You don't even realize that your Grinch smile has returned as you think, Why not have Foxtrot set off some of the pranks instead of Gilda? This way, she will get her just desserts for laughing at me earlier, as no one laughs at Skeletor and gets away with it! Nyeh! You look over to Foxtrot who, upon seeing you look, glares at you with suspicion. You don't care however, as you’re too busy mentally cackling over your soon to be prank spree over her. "Uh dude? What's with the creepy smile?” You snap out of it at Gilda's question and you look back at her with a sheepish smile. You quickly draw a picture of Sugarcube Corner with a question mark next to it. Gilda looks at it in shock as she says, "Dude, you must really be psychic! There's no way you would have known Rainbow invited me over to that place for some snacks. We should probably get over there now actually." While on the outside you nod at this and begin to follow Gilda with your two escorts following, on the inside, Let the downfall of Foxtrot begin! Neyhhehehehehe! A FEW MOMENTS LATER You, Gilda, and your escorts arrive at Sugarcube corner a few minutes later. And so far the show has played out like it should. In terms of the pranks at least. When you showed up with Gilda, naturally Rainbow got up in your face about it. But Gilda managed to diffuse the situation by saying you were just helping her get there. Rainbow was suspicious of course, but she accepted the answer. You were a little confused as to why she didn't question you about the whole 'kissing' thing, but you just assumed Gilda was too embarrassed to bring it up or she just never ran into Rainbow before finding you, or maybe she’s acting like a true tsundere and pretending it never happened. Anyway, after that Pinkie put her pranks, which before used to be only Rainbow’s, into action. But so far you have managed to stop Gilda from being on the receiving end of them. When it came to the joy buzzer, you 'accidently' bumped Foxtrot into Pinkie's hoof. The minute she hit her hoof she was in the air via electrocution. Thankfully the prank followed cartoon logic and she wasn't turned into liquid paste from all the bolts, instead she was stuck sporting the smoky smidge look, and her helmet hair was blackened. Of course while you were busy laughing your butt off at how ridiculous she looked, you didn't notice her approaching. By the time you did she had already 'subtly' shoved you. Sadly for you it was into the table where the spiced laid sweets were. And by some form of bad karma the sweets ended up smearing on your cut lips. AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! Needless to say, the Cakes need a new punch bowl. This leads us to where you are now. You are by the punch bowl, with your mouth in it like a horse, trying to cool the flames consuming your lips. The ponies around you, including Gilda, are all having a nice laugh about it. You can't seem to find what's so funny about your current predicament. I swear to god when I get my hands on some hair dye, Foxtrot is waking up a new shade of pink and neon green! Eventually everyone calms down and goes to chatting with each other as you finally start to feel your lips cool. However before you can even bask in the feeling you find yourself dragged into a closet with Pinkie. You give the mare a confused look as she says, "What the hay Skelly!? You totally messed up Rainbow and my’s hoof buzzer and spicy sweets pranks! Why'd you mess them up? I'm trying to get back at Gilda for hurting you remember?!" To this you can only stare at her dumbly as you think, Uh....I don't really know what to do here. I mean I'm just trying to save Rainbow and Gilda's friendship from crashing and burning, but since you think she's evil due to a misunderstanding that'll just make you think I'm crazy. "Come on Skelly, don't tell me you’re just being a meanie mean pants,” she pouts at you. “Why are you messing up my pranks? And please tell me you have a reason, I don't want you to be a meanie mean pants." You can feel your heart breaking at Pinkies look and words. To avoid ruin and from feeling a great amount of guilt for hurting the pink pony emotionally you calmly think of a way to turn Pinkie to your side when it comes to Gilda. DON'T WORRY YOU ADORABLE PINK PONY! SKELLY HAS A PERFECTLY GOOD REASON, HE'S JUST TRYING TO STOP A EMOTIONAL BREAK DOWN OF A SENSITIVE GRIFFON WHO HIDES BEHIND A TOUGH AND RUDE PERSONA!!! Did I say calmly? My bad, I meant irrational and thought up last minute plan to turn Pinkie to your side. Drawing quicker then you've ever done before you show Pinkie... MagicLover2128's Comment Multiple pictures of the griffon trying to convey how she has a temper problem and cases of jealousy along with slight racial problems which she shows through her anger and hidden side of discomfort and awkwardness that she masks behind her stern and rude attitude. At least that’s what you try to show with Gilda snarling, with chibi sad looking Gilda in a thought bubble. By the time you’re finished Pinkie is almost in tears as she sniffles and says, "Oh how could I have been so blind?! That poor griffon was just trying to express herself but couldn't find the right way to do it. That whole bleeding lip was just an accident of her self-conscious breaking through, and instead of her being the jerk I'm the jerk!" The dam breaks and the pink pony starts bawling. You react quickly, scooping her into your arms and petting her mane as a few tears escape from your eyes as well. You’re right Pinkie! God knows how you got that from my drawings, but you’re right. Gilda may act like a big tough and rude griffon, but on the inside she's just an emotionally confused cat-bird hybrid who just wants to be accepted! THE SIGNS WERE THERE ALL ALONG! After awhile the water works begin to slow down as you hear Pinkie sniffle and say, "I guess me trying to butt in her time with Dashie didn't help. Her only friend that understands her deeply and I was trying to hog her to myself. Oh Skelly, I was just jealous of them wasn't I?" You pull back from the pony and shake your head 'no' as you try to convey to her. Jealous people try to take what they can't have, you were just trying to spend some time with a buddy who was busy. Happens to us all. “You…you don’t think I’m a jerk?” you shake your head no, and show a picture of her, Gilda and Dash all laughing together and hold your thumbs up. "Thanks Skeletor you’re a great friend." You smile at her and pull her back into the hug. Thus continuing the sweet, wonderful friendship building moment that is this whole situation. If you were in a Persona game, you feel this would have been a rank up with Pinkie's social link. Nothing can ruin this moment. Nothing at all. "Hey look Gilda! Presents!" You and Pinkie's eyes snap open at Rainbow's statement hits your ears. God dang it! Spoke too soon! You and Pinkie break off the hug and burst open the door to try and stop Gilda from opening her booty trapped present. You notice that she has food smeared on her face, and a black ring around her eye. Crap! Rainbow Dash’s other pranks that the episode didn’t show must have gotten her. You’re both too late as she opens the trapped gift. However unlike in the show, instead of a bunch of snakes popping out smoke does. It takes awhile for the smoke to fade away, and when it does your in for quite the sight. For there before you is Gilda, strung up in a pink dress wearing a princess hat and holding a magic wand. Needless to say, the guests of the party start laughing like crazy. "Nice dress G! This reminds me of that prank those seniors in flight school played on us during that boring prom, you remember that?" Seeing how her face is bright red and she has steam about to burst from her head, yes Rainbow I think she does. Acting quickly you begin to rush towards Gilda, somehow managing to avoid the ponies laughing who pay no attention to you. They're all too caught up in their laughter to see the speeding human try and defuse the atomic Gilda bomb. As you reach her, you can only think one phrase over and over again in your head, Please work! Please work! Please work! With that you… At this point, anytime Gilda starts to be mean to ponies or get mad, Skeletor will forcibly calm her down via petting, redirecting her aggression towards him. Begin to pet the angry griffon, and as if by magic she calms down. Luckily no one’s looking at you two, so you’re fairly certain she won't try and kill you for doing it in public. Besides, too many witnesses. Eventually the crowd begins to calm down, and Gilda snaps back to her senses. How do you know this, well you just so happen to be nursing a sore arm courteously of Gilda's fist. "I told you not to do that in public!" You’re welcome for saving you from yourself and saving your friendship with Rainbow, you give an eye roll and pat her head like a dog, causing her to ruffle her feathers and frown. Before you can move away from the griffon and stop the last prank you remember from the show, suddenly Gilda tugs on your poncho. You look at Gilda in confusion, to which she just looks away while huffing. "Thanks...almost blew my top there, which would have totally been uncool. I’m not the only one that got pranked.” You look around and see other ponies who have clear signs of prankage. I did it! I actually did it! “Consider this thanks, and its not cause I like you or anything! I'm just paying you back is all…" With that said Gilda puts something in your hand and walks back over to Rainbow, who in turn gives you a suspicious look. You just raise your eyebrow at as you look at what Gilda gave you. What is this anyway? It feels like...plastic... Your eyes widen and your heart stops when you see what it is. It is... Derrick-Skalula's Comment A perfectly good roast beef looking sandwich inside a plastic baggy. You don't even question where she got it, you already have the bag open and are scuffing down the meaty goodness. Twice in one day! That's it, I'm in heaven! This is the grea-wait a minute. It's not till you finish eating that you realize how...quiet everyone has gotten. With the last piece of the sandwich still in your mouth you look up to see what's up. I wonder why everyone is so quiet? Did something....hap....pen...Oh no. You see all the ponies looking at you in horror, while Gilda is just face...clawing(?) at your stupidity. You swallow the last bit of sandwich. It’s just meat! I’m not scary! However before half the ponies run out the door and the other half charge at you, your savor comes in the form of an unlikely pony. "Alright everypony, settle done. No need to get so freaked out." Everybody's attention goes to Foxtrot, who is still covered in smoke but has an 'I don't need this right now' look on her face. You can only look at her in confusion, and it seems the others as well as one of the flower trio shouts out, "How can we not freak out?! It is eating meat! It could be pony meat or something!" Don't you three usually faint by now? You wonder raising an eyebrow in their direction. "It's looking at us!" *Bump Bump Bump* Nevermind, I stand corrected, just a late response, you facepalm. The Flower Trio's reaction seems to spark something in the crowd as they all start to mumble out their worries of you eating them. You even hear a stallion say, "Its goanna eat them.....and then its goanna eat me....OH SWEET CELESTIA!!!" What the hell!?! Who quotes Troll 2 unironically?! I know the show has a lot of pop culture references, but really?! Foxtrot suddenly whistles very loudly drawing all attention to her. When all eyes are on her she clears her throat and says, "Listen, the creature is an omnivore. There is nothing to worry about. The animal caretaker Fluttershy also confirmed this." You hear a familiar voice ask, "What's an o-mi-vore?" Sweetie Belle!? Where are you you adorable dictionary? "Look, it eats meat and greens,” Foxtrot answers. “And before you ask, no it does not eat ponies. In fact according to the creature the thought of that disgusts him, so I’m sure others of its kind don’t either.” You nod your head rapidly at this, but you can't help but think, Well as long as you’re not from Europe where that's sorta kinda a thing.* The crowd still looks unsure, but Pinkie pops out of nowhere as always and adds, "Yeah, Skelly would never eat a pony! He is one of my bestest friends after all. Gilda’s also an Om nom nomivore, and she’s great right?" Ha! Best friend status in only two weeks! Suck it OC's and Self-Insert characters! You think, forcing yourself from hugging her right then and there for the save. As if Pinkie's words are magic (which they probably are) the crowd goes back to normal, as if nothing happened. Even Gilda gives Pinkie an appraising look for her little shout out. You give Pinkie a nod in thanks, but you look at Foxtrot in inquiry. "Don't get the wrong idea, I was just stopping you from hurting the civilians if a riot broke out due to your little (gag) snack. Be careful next time, because I won't do this again." Oh you are so Lassiter! Right down to using your job as an excuse for doing something nice for me, you smirk smugly. Foxtrot rolls her eyes at your look and walks off. With her gone you go back to the task at hand. Now where is that cake? Veo Skride's Comment BrownDog's Comment "Cake time everypony!" Your eyes widen as you see Mr. and Mrs. Cake rolling out the cake with the fake candles. Now you wouldn't be so worried...if the candles didn't look like poorly made TNT! You look at Pinkie wide eyed, to which she chuckles nervously. "I may or may not have ran out of trick candles, and I may or may not have decided to use the fancy red sticks that some construction ponies left here during their break. I mean they make such a loud sound when they go off and make the ground lo-oh." God dang it Pinkie! If those go off you'll be arrested for murder! You facepalm, I doubt cartoon logic is goanna work here! Thinking quickly you pick up a nearby fork and throw it at a balloon on the other side of the room. The fork hits its target and the pop draws everybody's attention. With that down you rush towards the cake, and before you even know what you’re doing you cannon ball into it. Cake goes flying everywhere, and the TNT is thrown out the window. You slowly get up from the ruined cake and see all eyes on you, though half those eyes are covered in cake and frosting. You just chuckle airily, and quickly throw a piece of cake at Pinkie. Pinkie takes the hit, and soon smiles wildly as she shouts out, "FOOD FIGHT!" Soon the room is full of laughter, shouts, and flying cake. Amidst all the chaos, you see Gilda and Rainbow Dash laughing and getting into it as well. Smiling, you rush up the stairs, to save your poncho from being more stained than it already is. That's the last prank, my job here is done. Time to shower...then pass out for the day. Let the fuzzy tiny horses have their fun. SOMETIME LATER: IN THE SHOWER What the hell was in that cake!? You've been scrubbing your hair for the past ten minutes and there is still pieces of cake and frosting stuck in it. You’re pretty sure Pinkie might have made the stuff outta glue, cause its sticky as heck too. I swear Pinkie if I have to go bald... You hear a knock coming from the door to the bathroom, but you ignore it since you can't really say anything. Probably just Pinkie checking up on me or something. "Uh dude...are you in there? I wanna talk to you." The hell!? Why is Rainbow outside the bathroom door!? You panic as your eyes widen in shock. WHAT DO YOU DO?