I’m obviously not drunk enough.
Can I get another round in this bar?
I think, no! I do need another glass of cider at this point, otherwise the overwhelming amount of mental pain will crush me inward. No! Fancy Pants and I aren’t breaking up! Why would you think up something like that? We are madly in love with each other and have a healthy relationship! Nothing is wrong with us at all!
It’s true, and I’m willing to defend it as well! We’re financially stable, competent with our marriage, and looking forward to kids one day! It’s a match made in paradise and I’m happy to call him my wonderful, caring husband!
The problem is all of you ponies!
That’s right, I said it! You’ve all called me an airhead, selfish, careless, air headed unicorn with my eyes only set on the wealth of Mr. Fancy Pants! You all thought I was a gold digging whore with no care in the world for the real man I’ve come to love! Yup! That’s it! All I want is his money!
What in tartarus kind of ideology is that?!
I only want his money, psh! If that was the case, I would have married him sooner than the TWO YEARS we’ve dated before our engagement. I would have made love to him sooner, boosted his spirits, and then live in the luxury of his mansion while sipping on martinis while Octavia Melody played a private concert for me and him.
Sound nice. Right?
Well, that didn’t happen. We, like every other sane pony, took it slow at first. I’d just recently gotten out of the Royal Guard at that time and was readjusting to the life of a normal pony. Man, oh man, was Fancy such a tremendous help at the time!
He came in and helped me out in more ways than one. First off, he got me a job with a local photography and modeling studio, practically jump starting my career towards being a fashion model. Next, he proved a roof over my head by letting me stay in a condo he owned outside of Baltimare. Lastly, he treated me with kindness and respect even when I felt like the poor mare that I was.
In fact, Fancy never saw me that way. He picked me up, brushed off the dust, and treated me like I was worth everything to him. How could one not fall in love with a man like that?
So, that’s how our relationship can to be. To him, he said it was like, “Treating a diamond that was thrown into the roughest of conditions. She’s still worth it in the end, but needs a little bit of picking up, washing off, and then shining once more.” I was his diamond, and he was my pearl.
Such a gentle stallion he is! I’ve encountered such a kind, gentle equine that can see the best in any given situation. You don’t believe me? Well...
For example, he once complimented an upcoming fashionista named Rarity. He called her style “charmingly rustic,” despite the fact other elitist said her dresses were something along the lines of hideous! Screw them!
Let them be all up in the clouds with their ideas of being better than every other pony below them! Don’t they know their head is full of the air of they breathe? Well, certainly I should know since I look like I’m not wanting to pay any attention at all!
I look like I’m always dreaming, not caring about a worry in the world. Well, guess what sweetie, it’s true. I don’t really care anymore since I do have Fancy Pants. I’m in love with him, what’s wrong with a mare swooning for her stallion every now and then? Why can’t I cling onto him for the personality he holds? Oh, my! Why can’t I just be a lady and fall for him?
Oh, no! I must be strong and look like I don’t fall easy for guys with money! Psh! Please, you can kiss my ass. I know those marriages don’t work out in the end, anyways. I’ve heard the songs, heck everypony has heard the same old song and dance before as well!
The mare falls for the man with money, marries within a couple months, and then finds out his love isn’t all that cracked up to be. Either he is abusive or not around her all the time due to reasons beyond her control, such as the fact that he never even loved her to begin with. Oh, the irony!
I guess love came back to bite you in the ass, missy!
Meanwhile, and like I said, me and Fancy took it slow for a reason. Besides the fact I was rearranging my life, him and I wanted to make sure we were falling in love for all the right reasons. We wanted to make sure we wanted each other, for each other. We wanted it to be that we loved each other for the ponies that we are and not because of any other outside factors.
For example, he didn’t want me just because of my looks. Yes, I’m pretty, but that shouldn’t be the only reason why he would fall in love with me. Meanwhile, on the other hoof, I didn’t fall in love with him because of his money, no surprise there! He wanted to make sure I loved him for the nice, gentle stallion he is. To which, I did. Same went with him to me.
So, I guess I shouldn’t be all up in hooves over what others are saying. Maybe If I remained so keen on the truth of the matter, then maybe it should provide me enough ignorance to block out all the gossip and rumors other ponies love to keep spreading on about him and I. However, I know I’m drunk, so I guess my filter just fell and burned to crisp. So, yes. That’s what I think about this whole situation.
I’m Fleur Dis Lee!
I’m happy to have Fancy Pants and you can’t do anything about it!
So why does it give you the right to say something?