Chocolate milk, chocolate milk. Nice relaxing chocolate milk. Forget the itch, that’s not important.
Yes it is…
No, no its not.
But it really is.
Shut up you.
No.
I said shut up.
You’re itchy.
SHUT UP I’M NOT ITCHY.
Hey how’s that itch going?
I WILL END YOU
But I’m you
I DON’T CARE, I HATE YOU
You’re still itchy
SHUT UP ABOUT THAT ALREADY
You’re also bored, not to mention the itch. Hey how does it feel to be beaten by six mares and by your own arrogance, or as you like to call him, Steve. Don’t forget about the itch. You know sleeping would be fun, but you can’t do that while imprisoned in stone. Bet your feeling pretty itchy right now. Chocolate milk is so tasty; if you weren’t trapped you could drink some. You’re still itchy, don’t forget about that. I bet it would be so nice to itch it right now.
…leave me alone…
No, I am you, I can’t just go.
…I hate you…
Hey guys, how’s it going?
YOU! GET OUT OF HERE STEVE I WILL BREAK YOU!
What’s his problem?
He’s still pretty mad about you causing him to lose
Ugh, still?
STOP TALKING BEHIND MY BACK
Hey you’re forgetting about your itch
FOR THE LAST TIME SHUT UP ABOUT THAT. AND YOU, STEVE, GET OUT OF HERE ALREADY!
Fine, fine I’m going
There he’s gone. Do you feel better?
A bit…
Just don’t forget about the itch.
I hate my life
You know what would be fun?
What?
If you had someone to talk with
Yeah that would be nice, I'm pretty sick of you
No need to be like that, Princess Luna is coming for a quick chat
What? Really? What for?
I don't know! I'm your subconscious, I notice things out of the corner of your eye and other stuff that you don't really pay attention to. I don't read minds. Hey remember when you used to be able to do that, you know, until you were beaten and trapped in stone
Shut up already...
*
Luna walked forwards with her mane swirling around her body. She closed her eyes and her horn lit up. A small beam shot out and coated the statue in front of her in a dark blue aura. Slowly stone began to crumble and shards fell to the floor leaving a small pile in front of him. His arms crackled loudly as he stretched them out widely. They randomly shot out twice their distance before snapping back to their regular shape. His wings were like dry paper and rustled as they unfurled. He reached behind him and dug his claws into his back. He fell to the floor in ecstasy as he scratched that one spot which had been so itchy for far too long. He almost sobbed out loud.
He heard a small cough and looked up to the glare of Princess Luna. He gave a small chuckle before leaping at her. She waved her head and chains exploded from the ground. In a hexagon shape the chains unwound and wrapped around his limbs. One for each arm, leg and tail and one tied up both his wings. They pulled him sharply to the ground, burying his face into the dirt.
Princess Luna looked down before snorting "And here we were worried something was going on."
Discord looked up with his mismatched eyes "Now what in all of Equestria are you talking about dear? I've been minding my own business, trapped in stone." He lay down sideways on one elbow, still wrapped up in the thick chains.
Princess Luna gave him a cold glare "We felt your mental wavelength spike up nastily a few times."
Discord chuckled deeply "That was simply me shouting at myself"
Luna took a small step back "...yourself?"
Discord sighed and turned over, chains rattling noisily "Yes, well you see. My subconscious hates me, and Steve, ugh Steve, won't leave me alone!"
Luna cocked her head to one side "Steve?"
Discord groaned as he realised there was no comfortable position "That is the name I give to my arrogance, the thing that allowed those ridiculous elements to best me."
Luna nodded "Just checking" She waved her horn and the stone on the floor shivered
Discord looked at her with puppy eyes "You can't put me back in stone straight away. Please, I need more time. I beg of you, one chocolate milk. I beg of you."
Luna looked thoughtful before shaking her head "We suppose it couldn't hurt."
Chains slowly unwound from around his left claw. His arm reached out and snapped his talons
Nothing happened
He tried again, and again but there was still empty space where by all the Lords of Chaos there should be chocolate milk
Luna rolled her eyes before shooting off a spark which manifested itself into a small glass of chocolate milk "I've given you the bare minimum of your powers back. You're still bound by the elements." Discord frowned and looked closer at the six chains which bound him. Each was a different colour and had a small imprint on every link. One for each of the elements.
He lifted the cup high and drank deeply. He could feel the wonderful sugar rush through his body. He smacked his lips and sat down in the pile of chains. "So, what happens now?"
Luna gave a smug smile "You go back into the stone" At this she waved her horn against Discord's protesting
Stone shot up and curled around Discords limbs. The chains pulled his body back into a familiar position that he had been stuck in for the last week or so. Okay, so he hadn't been in that long. But still, he never stayed in the same place for more than four hours, it was a rule of his.
*
Hey how are you doing
I hate my life so much