//------------------------------//
// Some Explaining is Done 
// Story: A Young Knight's Agony 
// by Weavers of Dreams 
//------------------------------//

Apparently the ritual also ensures I cannot shirk my duties and run away. I hardly got ten feet before crippling pain ran through my body and I collapsed onto the stone floor, screaming. Rainbow Dash was the first by my side, cradling my head in her hooves as I twitched and flailed as if in a seizure.

There has to be a deeper reason for her acting this way than just being motherly. Motherly? That was so not in the show. Not that I watched it that often. You can just tell the patterns.

And this just didn't fit.

"Post-post script," Twilight read from a book about ritual rules. "The chosen hero cannot shirk his mission. Any attempt that he makes to shirk his mission will be met with crippling pain. If he manages to resist the crippling pain, his brain will leak from his ears until he is dead."

"You couldn't have told me this sooner?" I shouted, instantly regretting it as my headache grew worse. The skittles mare stroked my head softly. I'd complain if it didn't feel so good. I have to ask.

"Alright, what's wrong with this mare?" I demanded, jerking a thumb in her general direction. "This is so OOC it's almost painful."

"That's her story to tell," Applejack replied with a huff as she sorted through my discarded armor, looking for something. "Why don't you ask her?"

"Okay, fair enough," I coughed, managing to recover enough to sit back up. Boy, the mares did not look too happy at my attempts to get away. I really hoped there was another post script they kept them from killing me. Back to the matter at hand. "Okay, Skittles, what's your story?"

She blinked and looked away. "I... it's... well you see... I once..."

"C'mon, spit out already," I moaned. I hate when people pause in their sentences. Unless your the secret lovechild of William Shatner and Jeff Goldblum you have no excuse.

She looked at me for a long moment and then deflated, ears drooping to the point I almost felt bad. "You don't even know why you're here in the first place... do you?"

I shook my head. "Is it really that obvious? Gee, I thought for sure I was being so clever."

"Hey, you be nice, fella," Applejack scolded me from where she stood a distance away. I rolled my eyes.

"Twilight," Rainbow Dash shouted. Augh, my head. "Get over here an explain to this kid what he's here for."

"Quietly, please," I groaned pitifully. "Very... very quietly."

Twilight walked up and glared down at me. "Learned your lesson yet?"

I nodded. "Yeah-yeah. Do as I'm told or die."

"Not exactly how I would word it, but I'll take it," she whispered with a shrug. I was grateful. "Well... let's go with the history lesson first."

"No," I cried, not caring about the headache all of a sudden. "A thousand time no. I do not want to hear some stupid lecture about how things got this way. Keep it short, sweet, and to the point."

Her glare intensified, but she indulged me nonetheless. "Very well. The Crucible is too out of control, and Equestria is in ruin, and your the lucky lottery winner who we hope saves our sorry plots."

We blink at each other for a long while.

"Okay, maybe a little history lesson," I conceded with a grimace.

"Mm-hmm, I thought you might," she rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Long ago, a human appeared, dressed as a being from a cartoon he loved. With it he also held the power of this being. He was the first Displaced. He took up the mantle of a hero with the name Yosemite Sam..."

Brain.exe is not working. What? Yosemite Sam? Hero? Him?

"...and with his magic pistols and near invulnerability, he became the guardian of the western border of Equestria," she went on. With a straight face, I might add. How could anyone take that seriously? Where would you even get a Yosemite Sam costume? "After him came the others. Hundreds of humans bearing unbelievable powers and hearts longing for adventure."

Okay, this is sounding like some kind of silly fanfiction now. Would that be considered breaking the fourth wall? They say that's a very fragile part of your psyche. Shouldn't throw rocks.

"With their appearance, Equestria became a symbol of power and progress for the whole world," inventions and concepts we had never even dreamed of seemed to just spring up out of the rocks, we were even on the verge of our very first space program." Goodness, she looked like she was about to orgasm. Easy girl. Hold your horses. Pun totally intended. What I was hearing, so far, was nothing bad.

"Then, one day," she continued, growing less excited, her tone lowering, "a few of the displaced became discontent with the lack of excitement."

And there it was.

"At first we thought is was a just a standard outbreak of monsters and villains," she explained with her hoff gestures again. "Mad scientists, wizards with world-domination complexes, and devil-spawn from the fiery underworld seeking to cover the world in utter darkness... you know, the usual. But then we started noticing patterns."

"Let me guess," I interrupted her, "these displaced were causing the outbreaks to get into the spotlight again right?"

"We thought so too at first, yes," Twilight nodded. "Which would have been forgivable, considering the amount of times they had actually saved us before. But, that was not their intention. They were not using these outbreaks as diversions from the mundane, but as distractions. Keeping themselves in the spotlight to hide what they were working on in the shadows."

Interesting way to plot evil schemes. I thought so at least. Then again, I've never been that clever a guy.

"And what was their plan?" I tried to hurry her along. She seemed to get the idea.

"To trap every single displaced inside a vessel and leave Equestria without these powerful defenders of peace."

"Wow... that's a little dark," I muttered. "What kind of vessel? A vase? Cardboard box? A safe?"

"A used tissue box," she answered.

"By used do you mean...?"

"Yes, and more," she cut me off quickly, nodding curtly.

"That's just ill," I shuddered. "Would never think to look there."

"Neither did we," Twilight sighed sadly. "Until it was too late. Their displaced-catching spell worked well. Too well. The Perpetrators found themselves victim to their own devices."

"So you caught them?"

"Nope, we only know most of this due to notes found in their secret lair," she explained with a wave of her hoof. "As it turns out, tissue boxes are not great for containing a spell's integrity. Much less used tissue boxes. By the time we found the vessel, it had decayed into an abomination of a spell that would have made H. P. Lovecraft seem sane. When we attempted to release the displaced... well... something else came out."

"Cthulhu, perhaps?" I suggested an appropriate name.

"Oh how I wish." That does not sound good. "Best way to describe it? Uh... a giant... a mass of writhing... it can move... er... it, um, well... pinkish..."

"It's a giant blob made up of all the displaced, wieldin' all of their powers and corrupted to the core," Applejack said in place of Twilight's more jumbled description. "It's about the size of Canterlot, can move with amazin' speed, and is actually very intelligent. Thus the reason we're all hidin' in an abandoned temple in the Equestrian wastes."

"And you expect me to help you take care of it?" I asked redundantly.

"Don't see as we have any other options," she shrugged.

"Can you stop scaring him, already? He's about ready to pass out."

Why is it Rainbow Dash is the only one showing concern about my personal being? And why does she keep on avoiding answering my question?

Also, she was right. I did pass out. It was really hot in there.