...Nothing.
...Nothing.
...Nothing...
...Oh, what a surprise. Nothing!
"You sure you don't need-?"
"I'm fine, Spike."
The dragon gracefully backed off from my teeth-gritted statement, returning to the opposite side of the room where Twilight was, the alicorn occupied by surrounding with countless mounts of paperwork and scrolls. She cheerfully hummed while organizing the heaps of paper, and while pleasant to listen to, was slightly distracting as I scanned book after book, page after page, in search of the correct information I sought.
...Nothing.
"Look at all we've accomplished Spike!" I won't lie, I clinched at the vocal enthusiasm coming from the mare. "Every tidbit of information about other worlds, other species, everything we could find from Sunset and Jack's worlds! Imagine the effect this will have to Equestria, once all this work gets published into science and history books!"
"Heh, yeah, then everyone'll read 'em if they're put into those categories!"
Nothing... And nothing... Ugh, these books are utterly worthless! Not even a bit of information relating to the connection of balance and causing black holes out of nowhere!
"Just think, we'd be guiding all of Equestria to a new age! Everypony will be slack jawed and amazed by all this information never before seen in our world. Princess Celestia will be proud of us for sharing this among everyone! We'd be asked to host lectures and classes about humanity and other worlds, doesn't that sound fun?!"
"Count Rarity as one of those to be proud of us - moreso me - then I'll agree it sounds fun!"
I'm beginning to think we won't be finding anything useful here. What did Starswirl want me to find, again? Oh right! Something that can help us stop the imbalance indefinitely! But guess what? We're not finding anything! What that old pony was asking is probably never going to have results. As he said, this event has never been recorded in the history of Equestria, so what did he expect to uncover?
All there was were theories and ideas from old authors and idealists long gone.
"And maybe, just maybe, we'll be asked to give speeches about everything we've learnt thanks to our friends, not just in Ponyville, but Canterlot, Manehatten, the Crystal Empire, Las Pegasi, Yakyakistan, and perhaps all of Equestria! And you know what the best part about this would be? I'll have a special somepony who'll help validate our words and knowledge-!"
Slam.
My tired eyes glanced up to a startled Twilight and Spike. Whoops. "Sorry, go on." My tone hadn't meant to sound impatient, yet it did anyway. Frowning slightly, the alicorn cleared her throat before proceeding.
"As I was saying... We'll have someone who's not only from another world, and also dating a Princess! Not to sound smug, but I'd like to consider myself very lucky." Corners of my muzzle twitched at that, Twilight sending me a sly adoring expression... Which then turned to concern at my own frustrated look. "Although all I'm saying right now is simply a wishful hypothesis. There's not hurry to-"
"Twilight, I'd be more than happy to help you revolutionize Equestria." I smiled, albeit forcefully. "What makes you happy makes me happy." The alicorn looked relieved at that, and I pulled the next unopened book on the desk towards me.
I'll give it one more shot, I suppose. So long as I get no further distractions-
"Guys! The Crusaders got their cutie marks!"
Twilight and Spike collectively gasped at Pinkie's arriving outburst, and I slammed my head onto the open pages.
Alright, Starswirl, I think it's a safe bet to say that we won't be getting any results anytime soon in the library.
...Starswirl?
...
No answer. Sombra.
...
Also no answer. Great, the one time I needed them, and they decide to go off and play pool somewhere in my mind. Terrific.
Sighing, I knelt on the patch of grass above my usual hill tiredly. Absolutely fantastic. The old unicorn asks me to do some extensive research, and then goes silent when I have to ask the teacher some questions. We're facing a legitimate threat to Equestria - one that may or may not be entirely of my own doing this time, again - and, as always, it falls to me to solve the mystery while those [BEEP]s share beer in my head and laugh at my frustrations.
So yeah... No results. The castle's library, unfortunately, held nothing concrete but theories and ideas proposed by ponies who had no real idea as to what they're talking about. If only it were that easy... I don't know, maybe I'm looking for answers at the wrong place. With another sigh, I rubbed my face in effort for calmness. Oh, I was calm, mind you, but I couldn't resist feeling as though I was being pressed for time.
The holes tearing through the fabric of reality spawned by traces of imbalance across Equestria has almost harmed someone close to me, twice. Spike, then Cadence. How much longer before it worsens? I dread thinking about it, so I won't. But this situation, now, can no longer be overlooked. I played around with the others for too long, focusing more on the well-being of my friends and dealing with episodes of the show, it was time to get really, really serious and deal with a situation of my own making.
The question was... How?
Curiously, my mind drifts back to the vague screech of a warning, provided to yours truly by a group of psychic yaks back at Yakyakistan. A speech foretelling awaiting dangers, something I still tried to uncover through the vagueness over impending doom.
'Chaos and Harmony in peril, a darkness born anew.'
So from what I'm gathering there, the imbalance is spawning something potentially dangerous, far more than the wormholes tearing across the world.
'The child who turns back time, her plans foiled will be.'
Someone related to time... Starlight, I'm guessing. Would she have some involvement with the wormholes. Were the time changes she intended to do going to create more devastating consequences than we thought? To the point it's even affecting the now before the event's actually happened?
'The stars will ignite, the worlds will burn, the sun cast out by the shadow who grows ever more.'
What does THAT mean...?
'Friendship and Balance unite, stardust revealed among the twilight.'
Didn't take a genius to understand that was related to myself and Twilight, and moreso my friends. Starswirl had said the magic of friendship was closely connected to the magic of balance, though he never explained very well how so, just some vague statements that magic led to friendship, friendship led to balance, and balance led to magic, forming some circle of some kind. I don't know, might just be pulling out of my [BEEP] here.
...I forgot anything else from the cryptic warning by the mystics, I'll dwell more on that later. But right now, work with what I've got. And so far, my only deduction is that the bigger the imbalance grows, something will come out of it. Something deadly. Something unparalleled. And Starlight was involved somehow. Meaning my answers may very well be uncovered once we reach the finale.
Which isn't too far, considering recent events-
"Hi Stardust!"
And speaking of said recent events. My tired head turned towards the three fillies eagerly racing up the hill to meet me. Their leader, Apple Bloom, spoke merrily with a wave, "Howdy Stardust! We were wonderin' where you were; we didn't see ya at the party!"
Oh right, that.
"Sorry girls." I smiled lightly in regret, rising to stand and stretching. "Wasn't in the party spirit. But congratulations anyway; you three earned those cutie marks of yours." Indeed. It was a time to celebrate, for them anyway. After so many trials and error, the Cutie Mark Crusaders have earnt what they yearned for, if the three shield marks on their rumps were of any indication.
The group beamed proudly at my words. Scootaloo nodded happily. "Right?! After so long we finally get our rewards! And who knew that all it took was to help others understand their special talents, right girls?"
Sweetie Belle added cheerfully, "Not to mention, who would've thought Diamond Tiara would have a hand in us earning our cutie marks? We not only made a friend, but got our marks on the same day! I'd call that a successful conclusion to the Crusader's ventures for their cutie marks!"
"I'm glad to see you're happy with what you got," I said sincerely, smiling at the three adorable fillies, beaming with positive energy. Unlike Spike, none of them objected to having their heads ruffled fondly. "I suppose this means you have a great new responsibility ahead of you. I'm proud of you all, as I'm certain everyone else is."
"Aw shucks." Apple Bloom waved in mature bashfulness, smiling widely with her friends. "We're proud of ourselves too, aren't we?" The other two nodded. Then, it appeared an invisible light bulb lit next to the filly Earth Pony's head, as she made a noise of epiphany and looked at me with a grin of realization. "Say, I just remembered! Did ya ever find out what your cutie mark meant Stardust?"
Apart from seeing it in a book, not really. All I knew was it was related to Balance in some way. So... Nope.
"Well, what if we help you find out what it means?" Sweetie Belle questioned excitedly, approaching my posture before she and the young fillies abruptly pulled back my cape to reveal the repulsive mark. "This can be our first mission with our new responsibilities to helping our friends uncover the secrets to their cutie marks!"
"Yeah!" Scootaloo agreed enthusiastically. "What do you say, Stardust? Want the help and expertise of the Cutie Mark Crusaders helping ya unlock the secrets to your mysterious cutie mark?"
Their expressions were nothing short of adorable, pleading with grins at me to say yes. Cute, and as much as I wished to indulge them, I highly doubted, in this case, the three would be of any real assistance. I was tempted to humour them, but my feelings felt compelled to the contrary, as though I couldn't afford to waste any further time.
My cutie mark can wait... Forever, for all I cared.
"Maybe another time, girls. I'm a bit busy-"
"Apple Bloom! Sweetie Belle! Scootaloo!"
My guardian angel arrives in the nick of time. We all turn to face the alicorn walking up towards us with a beautiful smile. "Hi Twilight!" Scootaloo greeted back happily. "Wanna help out? We're gonna help your special somepony find out what his cutie mark represents!"
The purple alicorn glanced between me and them with a humoured expression, knowing full well of my feeling towards the tattoo attached to my rear end. "Maybe another time, girls. Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Applejack are looking for you. Don't wanna keep them waiting, right?"
"Aww... If ya say so." They looked thoroughly put out, but immediately composed themselves and started jogging down the hill, waving to us both merrily. "That's okay, we can help you out later, Stardust! See you guys later!" We returned Apple Bloom's gesture, sharing with one another amused look as we watched after the three Crusaders happily skip back to town.
Twilight proceeded to ask, "Helping you find out the meaning of your cutie mark, huh?"
"Their words, not mine."
She looked at me shrugging, tilting her head. "And here I foolishly hoped you'd finally accept your mark and move on. Guess I was wrong."
"You're not always right, Twilight." I grinned playfully, whereas the mare shook her head with a smirk. Ah this banter never gets old.
"You left the castle rather in a hurry after the celebrations, I wanted to see if you were okay." Ah, straight to the point then.
I shrugged again at the topic change. "I'm fine love. Just... Put out, so to speak."
Violet eyes sparkled in understanding. "Still couldn't find what you were looking for, huh?"
Sighing, I regarded the grass between us. "No... And I get the feeling I won't find anything by looking again."
"You know I'm always here to help."
"I know." Cyan eyes raised up to interact with violet orbs. "And I always appreciate that. But... I'm not sure even you have the knowledge we're looking for, Twilight. Not that I'm saying you're incapable of helping!"
Twilight giggled, finding my hasty added statement to be somewhat endearing. "I know Jack. I never claimed to be omniscient myself, you know." With a weak grin, I looked away as Twilight continued, "Although, if the library doesn't have the precise information we're looking for, there are other alternatives."
"Such as...?"
Her tone then sounded slightly smug. "The one place I can think of regarding any matters related to your magic. Somewhere deep in Princess Celestia's castle possessing everything written and practiced by your teacher."
Where-?
Oh.
OH.
My head snapped to a smirking Twilight. "Starswirl's archives."
The trip to Canterlot was short and to the point. On the train ride towards the majestic kingdom, Twilight and I discussed what precisely we're looking for in the old scrolls. Upon arrival, we departed from the station on a brisk jog all the way to the clean castle, greeted by a guard who happily escorted us to the locked up archives and allowed us entry, leaving us to it upon Twilight's polite dismissal.
Alright, no bull[BEEP]ing this time. We get what we came here for, and leave, Twilight's worries about Celestia minding us doing so notwithstanding.
"Wish they'd kept things a little more organized..." Twilight muttered sourly, walking down one aisle of the shelves beside me. "There's not even an alphabetic order! This will take longer than we thought."
"Then we better start looking." Without waiting for her response, I hurried by the mare, eager to uncover what we seek. Twilight, understanding the urgency, dashed along another aisle as I did, beginning to carefully unroll any scroll that our guts told us to examine.
Anything with Balance and imbalance involved.
"I know."
My head craned over to the mare. "What?" But Twilight was already focused on reading one open parchment. Okay... Back to work.
Let's see... Eeny meeny miney... Aha!
...Nope. Useless information here.
Let's try... This one!
Nope.
How about... This one?
...Nope.
Ah come on Balance! You're suppose to be the magical force guiding my instincts here! Alright, let's take a look at this piece of parchment on the third shelf.
And... Nothing.
Ugh...!
"No luck on my end either." Twilight called out, evidently noting my expression. "Maybe we should check the other shelves!" Good idea. "Thanks!"
What? "I didn't say anything?" The alicorn blinked, before we shrugged the confusion off and went to examine all other scrolls and parchments possible. Zero time for distractions.
Let's see... A spell on magnifying one object to thousands of its size. Nice, but not relevant.
Ingredients on the cure to Cockatree's stone stares. Useful long ago, but unneeded right now.
An incantation on rising the undead... Tempting, but Halloween was already over a few weeks back.
"A parchment which displays how to summon one pony from another world to the next," Twilight commented in slight interest, shaking her head while rolling back up the scroll. "While everything we're viewing is fascinating, it's a safe bet to say that it'll most likely take us a while to anything related to Balance."
Well [BEEP], and dinner time is only a short moment ahead.
Her tongue clicked in disapproval. "No need to swear about it."
Okay, what the hell? My eyes glanced to the frown in confusion. "I didn't say anything?"
Twilight raised a skeptical brow, resuming her gaze on the next parchment she pulled from the shelf. Assuming the mare was now just hearing things, I'll worry about that later. For now, I moved over to another aisle, rubbing my beard in thought-
"Although... He's awfully cute when he's flustered."
I rolled my eyes. "Thanks Twilight."
From behind, she stated in sincere puzzlement, "I never said anything...?" What now? Cyan eyes looked over, meeting her confused orbs matching my own bafflement perfectly.
Were we... Both hearing things?
Twilight made a motion to shrug, before her eyes widened and jaw parted slightly, flabbergasted at something in my direction, prompting my frown. "Jack... Your- Your mouth didn't move, but I heard you ask if we were hearing things." Say what now? Impossible.
I said that in... My head...!
This time, our reactions were identical, the idea explaining this phenomenon too absurd to bare. "We're not... Hearing each other's thoughts, are we?" Okay... Haven't mentally spoken with one of my friends for a while, Starswirl and Sombra aside.
Twilight scarcely nodded, lowering her head in contemplation. "It must be your magic. The bond between us, empowered through Balance, must have allowed us to communicate even telepathically! This... This is an amazing discovery! A revelation nopony has witnessed before!" Though one of us was clearly happy about the news, she was hopelessly adorable whenever excited like this. Twilight's cheek turned red slightly...
Oh [BEEP], did she hear all that?
"Every word."
God dammit!
The mare could barely hold in a chuckle, and this time, it wasn't just her hearing thoughts. "Profanities aside, I wonder if we could project our thoughts to one another all the time. Maybe I can use that to get him out of bed more efficiently."
"Uh, don't even think about it." Twilight blinked, before her face blushed deeper in embarrassment. Okay, soon as we get back, I'm having Starswirl teach me to shield my mind, or something. Because last time I could communicate with someone this way was with Rarity when she was abducted by Borog-
Uh oh.
Twilight's expression was that of disbelief. "You never told me you had this ability; only that you can project emotions and memories to another pony!"
Well [BEEP]. Must of slipped my mind...
The alicorn was growing unamused, and clearing my throat, I swiftly turned back to the shelves. "We can talk about this later. Remember why we're here." Twilight huffed, resuming her work also. Thank God. Now then, how to look for the right information...?
Think Stardust. My mind reached back to trip through memory lane, seeking out anything useful that can give us clues to finding the correct info. That prophecy from the Mystic Yaks... Starswirl's teachings... The Crusader's visit earlier to help me find our my cutie- Okay, why did that pop up? I could care less about my damn cutie mark-!
...Wait.
That book Spike once found showing information about Balance showed an image of a heart with a centered star, identical to my mark...
...The mark! That's it!
"Twilight-!"
"I know. Your cutie mark." The mare was grinning brightly. "I overheard your deep contemplation." Oh. But my girlfriend was already skipping over across the room. "And if memory serves me correctly, the last time I came here with Pinkie when we looked for that time travel spell, we came across some parchments detailing cutie marks right over... Here!"
Oh... Then no time to lose!
Twilight smiled while looking through the scrolls. "It's positively endearing when he's excited like this. I just wish it wasn't so rare and far between..."
I heard that love.
Red face brightening, the alicorn hurried through the shelves, pulling out a suspected scroll. "Aha! This should be it! Let's find out!" And hastily unrolling the information, we peeked at the contents with eagerness and hope...
I know looking through the archives was too much to ask for...
Slumping against my seat, a low sigh emerged from my muzzle as the others talked about something, a party or other involving the Crusaders. Me? I was just leaning back against my throne chair in bitter disappointment. Because, guess what?
Our search in Canterlot... Meant nothing!
Yeah, nothing. Shocking right? Those parchments involving the secrets of cutie marks and their meanings? Nothing showing my own damn mark. The one time the thing could be useful to me, but that tattoo only proves, once again, to be the bane of my damnable existence. We came back to Ponvyille with empty hooves and failure, other than Twilight gaining the knowledge I could speak with others using telepathy, and pestered me the whole train ride about it.
So at least she learned something today...
"- Stardust?"
Hm, what? The six mares and one dragon were now regarding me all across the table. Ah right, the meeting. I leaned forward somewhat. "Sorry, what?"
Rarity tilted her head. "We were wondering if you wouldn't mind baking some of your extraordinary brownies for the castle party this evening."
Ah. "Yes sure, I'll get right on it." My friends expressed uncertain looks, with the exception of Twilight, who regarded me sympathetically, before she took the lead.
"Pinkie, could you make certain that the balloons won't pop so easily-" And I stopped paying attention, too focused on my own failure to really give a damn about a party being hosted inside the castle walls. They can have it for all I cared, because right now, I was hardly in partying spirit; the cloud of disappointment hanging over me.
And Starswirl and Sombra still have yet to answer me today.
Seriously, where were those two? Partying in my own head? You think they'd have plenty of time doing something else when the fate of Equestria wasn't an issue. But, just like my equine - and reptile - friends here, they were more concerned about something else entirely, clearly.
Well, to be fair, I haven't been entirely asking for their help regarding this imbalance crisis. They know something's up, but I haven't been too forefront with the details. As this was Balance's problem - so, by extension, my problem - alongside the fact I could be very responsible for the holes in the first place, the last thing I wanted was to get my friends involved in my mess.
Twilight, obviously hearing that, cast me a look of utter disapproval, as the others were occupied in their planning. Of course, she'd think otherwise. They all would. The alicorn frowned, before focusing back on the discussion I was paying little to no attention towards. I'm willing to bet the moment this meeting was over, my stubborn girlfriend intended to have words.
"Alright then guys! Enough small talk! Let's set everything up for Scootaloo and the others!" The others let out noises of agreement at Rainbow's eager outburst, following after the speedy mare outside the council room. Everyone save myself and another pony exited the room.
Welp, that's my prediction proven.
Twilight sighed, looking over to the seat of her boyfriend's beside her own. "Please say you'll at least attend the party. It'll mean a lot to the Crusaders."
"...I'll think about it."
That hardly pleased the mare, however. Twilight frowned in slight irritation. "I know you wouldn't allow yourself to disappoint the fillies." Ah great, now she's attempting to appeal to my fondness for kids. "I don't need to appeal to anything Jack; I know you that much." "I swear, he can be so needlessly moody at times..."
...Ughh...
"I said I'll think about it." Deliberately ignoring the pleading expression, I practically hurried to leave the room in a brisk pace. You'd think Twilight, of all people, would understand what it's like to feel as though you've failed a task handed by a teacher...
If she heard that little statement, I barely noticed her expression behind my retreating tail.
...
...
...
...Welp.
That's great. Feeling like a failure has also made me lose any inspiration to write. Tip of quill barely brushing the clear page, I sighed, struggling to write down todays experiences. If it were that simple, but even a writer can find difficulty when his feelings are involved.
It's funny, when you think about it. People often underestimate exactly how complex the skill of writing really was. It was a physical and mental activity all at once; using the body and imagination to write down what's on your thoughts. Ideas are often inspired by taking walks or going somewhere new and fascinating. Not to mention, meeting people or hearing something that lingers in your mind. Stories and characters are typically inspired by people, places and events. To write it all down, on paper or PC, requires intense concentration and conviction. Everything in life was a mental activity, when you dwell on it.
Everything is powered by the brain, that's why.
And right now, my brain was more focused over reminiscing how much disappointment and annoyance that was coursing through my being. So much so I could scarcely jot anything down on paper today... Maybe tomorrow. That's how I usually resolve this kind of issue-
Someone's coming.
Balance's alert to a friend's presence immediately had me hide the sheets away to a secure drawer, right before a blue blur barged into my bedroom with an impatient expression. "There you are!" Rainbow exclaimed. "Why are you sat there moping? You should be enjoying the celebration party!"
"I'm not in the partying spirit." I shrugged, slyly placing the quill back in its ink bottle. "I'll join later, Rainbow, but right now-"
"Nuh-uh, Stardust, I ain't buying that excuse." With no regard for personal quarters, as ever, the pegasus grabbed me by the hoof and proceeded to pull me outside the room into the large hallway. Hearing no excuse, the mare thankfully released me and whirled around with hoofs on hips, glaring down from her hovering spot. "Alright Mr. Grouch, you gonna tell me why you're disappointing our friends by being a downer this time?"
I really had no incentive to. I shrugged again. "Can a man not wallow in his own failures in peace?"
Rainbow snorted, rolling her bright pink eyes. "For starters, you're a stallion now, not a 'man-'"
"And what an improvement that turned out being."
"- And second, we've put up with you acting all doom and gloom a while back for too long." The pegasus folded her arms expectantly. "So don't think for a second we're gonna let you act like this without us helping you out. So, spill, what's bugging ya, so we can go back and enjoy the party?"
How thoughtful of her. I half-considered a retort, but arguments won't get us anywhere. Plus, in all honesty, Rainbow Dash wasn't the first pony I'd consider bringing up my troubles to. But, like the others, she was still my friend, my best friend, and she wanted to help.
Whether it be by our bond or lack of common sense, I spilled the beans.
"Just disappointed." I admitted, turning to the floor slowly. "Starswirl asked me to do some research over danger against Equestria. I failed. The library had nothing. Canterlot had nothing. My own teacher isn't speaking to me to help... And I'm feeling utterly powerless by myself about doing any of this."
There. I said it. I felt too vulnerable without the aid of others. And I partially anticipated Rainbow to start laughing upon confessing as much.
But instead, the mare raised a brow. "That's it?" Alright... Wasn't expecting that answer. "You don't know something so what?" So what? Clearly, as ever, this mare underestimates the danger- "You haven't known too much about a threat before, right? So why should this time be any different?"
Unbelievable. I shook my head in disbelief. "Rainbow, this threat in particular was never suppose to happen-!"
Rainbow, again, shrugged indifferently. "Again, so what? It's never stopped you, me or our friends from fighting the danger before. We always win, in the end. So what should it matter?"
I opened my muzzle... But no words came out. Where exactly was she going with this logic...?
"Your problem is, Stardust, you always expect too much of yourself, and to be prepared for every danger coming. Only, guess what? Most of, if not all the time, you end up hurt and having us save your tail at the end." Her tone sounded less smug and more... Exasperated. "You pressure yourself into thinking you should be ready for anything, future knowledge or not. Stop doing that, and let your friends help out. We're here for you, and we can help prepare with you. So we might know little next to nothing, but we can't let that hang over us, right? In the end, when we work as a team, we always succeed! You said so yourself, we're the good guys, and the villains never win in this world!"
Except for the apparent one time they will in the upcoming movie... But...
With a sigh, a small, gratified smile emerged on my muzzle. Help often comes from the unexpected, and her confident assurance was very much needed. "You know, sometimes, sometimes, Rainbow, you are a very mature young mare."
The pegasus smirked. "What do ya mean 'sometimes?'"
I grinned slightly. "Indeed... Thanks, Rainbow. Perhaps you're right, I do expect too much of myself. Perhaps I shouldn't keep thinking I should be ready to handle everything without talking to my best friends."
"You're darn right." Rainbow nodded in agreement. "Now, will you stop being such a sourpuss and come enjoy the party. We made it specifically so the Cutie Mark Crusaders can celebrate with everyone in Ponyville for getting their cutie marks." Her eyes reflected with something. Pride, maybe?
It's what was bubbling in her chest, I could sense it.
With a tired smile, I replied positively, "Why not?" Party means cake? Who knows, I might help myself to the biggest piece while they're not looking-
"Heh, don't count on it."
What? "...Oh God, not you too...!"