//------------------------------//
// Crime: Vandalism 
// Story: Luna's Cuddle Dungeon 
// by CategoricalGrant 
//------------------------------//

“So you finally caught our little vandal?” Princess Luna asked, her eyes peeking between the bars and into the cell where a young unicorn filly was coloring on some paper. “Why isn’t she tied to the table?”
“I didn’t do it. Restraining a foal just feels...weird. It’s not like she’s going to escape or anything,” the newest guard explained.
“I can do it,” Papaya Sunrise added. “We duct-taped the newbie to the wall last night, so it’s not like I’ve got any moral barriers with regards to restraining pitiful children.”
Luna noticed the new guard’s hurt expression and rolled her eyes. “That won’t be necessary. I’m already here.” As soon as the guards had unlocked the door, she strode inside.
The dark blue filly looked up briefly from her coloring to look at the Princess. After a few moments, her eyes returned to the page, as did her crayon. Her pink mane swayed gently as she moved the crayon up and down the page.
“Do you know why you’re here?” Princess Luna asked her.
The filly was silent for a moment as she continued to draw. Eventually, she spoke up. “For throwing rocks.”
“Indeed. This has been going on for a while; and not just throwing rocks, but using them to break very pretty and important windows. There is nothing ‘cool’ about doing that.”
The little unicorn looked back up at the princess. “You don’t know what cool is. You’re old!”
Princess Luna gasped and held a hoof to her chest in shock. “I am not!”
The little filly squinted up at her skeptically. “Aren’t you like, a million-zillion years old, or something?”
Luna’s cheeks puffed out indignantly. “No! I’m only fifteen! ...Plus or minus a few orders of magnitude,” she retorted, whispering the last part. “That was very rude of you! Didn’t your mother ever teach you manners?”
“My mom died when I was a baby,” the filly said, looking back down to her coloring page. “I usually take care of myself.”
“I...uh...oh.” Luna’s ears flopped against the sides of her head.
“Sometimes Daddy comes home acting funny, and he yells and breaks things,” the filly added, almost as an afterthought.
Luna visibly cringed. “Well, I guess I’m a terrible pony, now,” she stated, mostly to herself. Walking over to the coloring foal, she squatted down to bring her to eye level. “What is your name?”
“Shadow Rose,” she responded, putting her crayon down again. Luna could tell she was far more interested in coloring that talking about her offense.
“Well, Shadow Rose, you know that breaking windows is wrong, don’t you? We’ve had to replace those important windows several times over the last month because of you.”
“...I guess,” Shadow Rose replied reluctantly.
Princess Luna closed her eyes and thought for a moment. “The reason that those windows are so important is that they depict very important heroes in Equestria’s history...Do you want to read a story about a hero with me?”
Shadow Roses eyes sparkled with interest for a moment. “O-okay. Nopony ever reads to me.”
“Come and sit with me,” Princess Luna said, taking a seat in the corner of the room near some fluffy pillows. Shadow Rose followed, and positioned herself between Princess Luna’s front legs.
Lighting up her horn, Princess Luna transported a foal’s book from the castle library into the room. “This story is called, ‘The Knight and the Evil Wizard’. In it, a brave warrior rescues a princess. Have you heard of it?”
Shadow Rose scrunched up her muzzle. “The coffeeshop lady says that stories about princesses being saved by stallions are misag...miserger...misgenistic and relics of...opppretun.”
Princess Luna frowned. “Goodness, child, have you never had the chance to just be a foal?” She opened the book to the first page, displaying a beautifully drawn picture of a faraway kingdom.
Shadow Rose leaned gently into Princess Luna, both for comfort and so that she could better see the pretty pictures.
“A long time ago, in a magical kingdom far, far away…”





In the observation room, the newest guard on the Cuddle Dungeon team was overwhelmed by the sweetness of the scenario. “Princess Luna even loves foals...Is there anything she can’t do?”
Papaya Sunrise did not let his eyes wander away from the touching scene for a moment, but the forlorn smile on his lips broke temporarily as he let out a sigh. “Kid, thing about being in this job is that you’ll never know true happiness...But, you know exactly what it looks like.”





“And so all of them, even the once-evil wizard, lived happily ever after.” Princess Luna closed the book with her magic.
Shadow Rose looked up at her hopefully from her position nestled snuggly under Luna’s barrel. “That was a fun story!”
“I’m glad you liked it. I’ll make you a deal.” Princess Luna placed the book on the floor and tapped a hoof on it. “I’ll read to you whenever you want, but you have to promise not to break any more windows in the castle. Whenever you feel like you want to throw rocks, go talk to a guard and ask them to bring you to me for a story. Alright?”
Shadow Rose stood up and plunged her face into Luna’s fluffy chest in her best attempt at a hug. “Thank you, Princess Luna! I promise, I’ll do that!”
Luna smiled broadly and patted the filly’s head with a hoof. “Good.” She unlocked the door with her magic and let it swing open. “You can go now; one of my guards will let you out of the castle.”
Shadow Rose lingered for a few moments. “A-actually, can you read me another story before I go?”
Princess Luna tapped a hoof against her muzzle in mock thought, just to hide her growing smile. “Well, alright. One more.”