//------------------------------// // To Con an Immortal // Story: Con of the Ages // by Silvermyr //------------------------------// Three ponies went through the early night towards the majestic Canterlot Castle. One of them, a white unicorn with a curly mane, looked up towards the elegant structure of battlements and towers. Moonlight bathed the building and gave it an otherworldly luster, almost like it was covered by nacre. She looked away and instead to the lilac earth pony beside her. The third pony had a dark hood over her head and went slightly behind the other two. None of them seemed to pay her any mind at all. ”You ready for this, darling?” Rarity asked her oldest friend. She was not sure what answer she hoped to get. ”Honestly, no,” Suri said in a snappy tone, at once excited and uncertain. ”I don’t see how this could work, m’kay. But I do know that if I’m not in on it, I’ll regret it my whole life. Just like when we fixed Coco. Go big or go home.” Rarity took a deep breath and nodded decisively. ”I’d rather go big. Oh, where would I be without you, Suri? You always know what to say to make me feel better!” ”Always happy to help you, friend,” Suri grinned. The three ponies stopped a little while away from the castle gate. ”You or me?” ”I will do it,” Rarity said quickly. ”I’m feeling… mischievous tonight.” ”If there is anypony who can wrap those boors around her hooves, then it’s you,” Suri said encouragingly while glancing at the royal guards who stood by the castle entrance. None of them had moved a micrometer since Rarity and Suri spied on them from the lunch table across the street hours earlier, and they had yet to see either of the two guards blink. Rarity felt a shiver of anticipation run down her spine. If there was one pony who could do this, then it was her, just like Suri said. ”Hello~o!” She tittered happily and went up to the two guards with a spring in her step and open expression. The guards both shifted their eyes to her, but remained still otherwise. ”Gentleponies, I am oh so sorry for being a bother, but I need to ask something of you two.” She batted her eyelashes quickly. ”Perhaps… you know who I am?” ”Rarity Belle. You are expected,” one of the guards said stiffly. ”Oh, yes I know, and I do so hate to keep the princess waiting, but I am afraid there has been a teensy mistake about my invitation,” Rarity added just a little distress into her voice. ”Only me and my partner were invited, not our secretary!” ”A royal scribe will provide any service you require,” the guard said dismissively. ”No uninvited pony can enter the castle after the changeling incident.” ”Oh but my secretary and me are so close! She has been with me during every big move I have made! Oh Pleeease can’t you make an exception for little old me? What harm can my secretary do?” ”No exceptions.” ”Pretty please with cherries on top?” ”No exceptions.” Rarity’s lips turned upwards in a coy smile. She went closer until she could feel the guard pony’s coat brushing ever so lightly against hers. ”Are there really… no exceptions?” she whispered huskily in the guard’s ear. She let her tail shift from side to side, just as she would if she had been in heat. A neat little trick to persuade blockheaded stallions. The guard glanced at her moving tail and then back to her eyes. She winked conspiratorially, smirked and gave just the smallest nod, striking a wordless agreement that she would never dream of honoring. ”Your secretary may enter,” the guard said authoritatively. The other guard continued to look straight ahead. Rarity was sure that if somepony tested, they would find him clinically dead. Without thinking more about it, Rarity went into the castle. Suri and the ”secretary” followed. Rarity had expected the castle to be positively crawling with guards, but the corridors and battlements all seemed deserted. Of course, that was perfect for their plans, but she still felt unnerved by the vastness of the castle. This was a building where she would find the grandest balls, the most exquisite banquets, the finest couture in Equestria. It should not be deserted like this. ”Now, you stay here until we call,” Suri instructed the third pony when they stood outside the throne room. ”When we call she will be distracted, m’kay. That’s when you strike. Just give us some time to lure the princess into lowering her guard.” ”Fine,” the hooded pony said shortly. She stopped outside the large golden doors. Rarity took a deep breath, felt Suri’s hoof comfortably around her neck, and exhaled. They smirked cheekily at one another and entered. ”You are late,” Celestia greeted them. ”You were asked to be here fifteen minutes ago.” ”She is not late, your highness.” Flim said in a forgiving voice, as if Celestia had accidentally insulted a rare work of art. ”She is fashionably late. That is a world of difference. Well, a word of difference.” Rarity felt her approval for the unicorn increase. He was witty and had a certain air of careless elegance to him. ”Well then, now that we are all finally here, let us begin.” Celestia’s tone broke no argument. She sat down at a large circular table and motioned the others to the chairs across from her. The five sat down, but left the seat just in front of Celestia vacant. That was Filthy Rich’s negotiating tactic; this way they forced her to look to the side when she wanted to speak with them, and she could never feel like she reached all her guests at the same time. Furthermore, as Filthy had explained, the five of them spread out in front of her, making her feel surrounded. Nothing they did to bring her out of balance, even down to the seats they took, was without worth. They needed every advantage they could get. When they sat down, Rarity had the opportunity to study the Princess of Equestria closely. She furrowed her brow; these last few years had not been kind to the princess. The last alicorn limped slightly on her left hind leg, where the mad king Sombra had severed her tendon with dark magic, and her right wing did not lay perfectly against her side after Discord had turned it inside out it as part of some twisted prank. The lines around the alicorn’s lips and muzzle were pulled taut, like she had forgotten how to smile, and her once benevolent eyes now just looked tired. ”We thank you for inviting us here, esteemed Princess,” Flam began. ”How may we humble shopkeepers be of service?” ”I hoped you could clarify something for me,” Celestia said. Her voice was naked and barren, far from the warm, enveloping song she spoke with before the return of Nightmare Moon. ”The other day I was visited by a lawyer by the name of Inky Stamp. She said she represented the five of you and that you were initiating a merger between your three companies.” ”Quite correct,” Filthy said. ”But I did not expect the Princess to care for such trivialities.” ”We all know it’s not a triviality,” Celestia said. ”And we all know why I care. I asked you here in hopes of convincing you to stop your merger. Equestria needs stability at a time like this. You could very well spark an economic crisis if you go through with this. In the name of all my little ponies I ask you to step back from your plan.” ”Now that all sounds positively adorable, Princess,” Rarity all but tittered. ”But I am oh so sorry to say that, in my humble opinion, your work of late has been… lackluster.” Rarity gave an apologetic smile. ”In fact, I think you deserve some rest and relaxation. A little time for you to focus on your own wellbeing in these trying times. But have no fear, I am certain me and my colleagues would not mind filling in for you.” ”Just what are you insinuating, little pony?” Celestia asked. Her eyes seemed like flint, drilling into Rarity’s. She fidgeted under the glare. ”Exactly what I said,” Rarity squeaked and launched a magical beam at Celestia. She could see the alicorn’s surprised look for just a moment. ”NOW!” Suri screamed. Rarity felt the adrenaline rushing into her veins. Now there was truly no turning back; now all she could do was to ride this madness to the end. The doors flew open and the pale lilac unicorn shot a turquoise beam right over the empty seat, saving Rarity from what she imagined would have been be a fiery death. Celestia looked away to the door, but only managed to open her wings before the beam struck her. Rarity did not know what to expect from this pony, but this was not it. The moment the beam made contact, Celestia became stiff as a board. The Princess did not make a sound, but based on the expression on her face, she was in a great deal of pain. She wriggled helplessly, twitched and then opened her mouth in a wordless scream. Then Rarity saw it. The Princess’s cutie mark was beginning to shift slightly, like some invisible hoof was trying to peel it of Celestia’s coat like a foal would a sticker. She gasped as the cutie mark literally lifted from Celestia’s flank, linked only by a few thin strands of golden magic. Then, like a taut string finally snaps, so did the small filaments of magic. A shiver went through Celestia. She started hyperventilating. Her eyes looked around frantically, and Rarity was certain they stopped on her just as Celestia lost consciousness and slumped forward. Starlight Glimmer released her magic grip, disposing the alicorn unceremoniously on the elegant table. ”Masterfully executed, if I do say so myself!” Flim said with a flashing smile towards Starlight. ”I don’t think any other pony could have pulled it off half as well!” Rarity felt a small pang of something that was definitely not jealousy as the shaven unicorn continued to shower Starlight Glimmer with praises. She just thought that was enough; they had work to do for Celestia’s… for whoever’s sake! ”Thanks, that’s enough,” Starlight bit him off. ”I have done my part. Now we can begin the real work in making all of Equestria a perfect equal utopia.” Starlight looked around. ”Our first step, naturally, will be removing the cutie marks of each and every pony in the land. Then we will start the tedious process of abolishing money, property and titles.” ”Without that, there will not be any way to express superiority, right?” Flam asked. ”Perfect equality.” ”Precisely!” Starlight glimmer giggled happily. ”So if you five would just stand together over there and I will remove your cutie marks too. Then, when everypony understands that the princess and the five wealthiest ponies in Equestria gave up their marks, they too will want to get rid of theirs.” ”I don’t know brother, it all sounds pretty dull to me,” Flim said with a sidelong glance to Flam. ”I was just thinking the same thing, brother of mine,” Flam said. ”In fact, now that miss Glimmer has done her part, what do we need her for?” ”Very true, m’kay,” Suri chimed in. ”You know, it almost feels like we’d be better off without her, seeing how she is threatening all we’ve built, m’kay.” ”And those equal signs everypony had in her village looked positively dreadful,” Rarity said. ”I won’t ever surrender my cutie mark for something as drab as that! No fashionable pony would!” ”I knew you greedy swines couldn’t be trusted!” Starlight screamed. A blood vessel pulsed on her throat. ”YOU WILL NOT STAND AGAINST MY EQUALITY!” ”Well, we all seems to be equally skeptical to you,” Flim said. ”That’s got to count for something.” Rarity laughed at that. ”QUIET!!” With a roar that would send Cerberus running, Starlight unleashed a massive ray of magic against them. Flim and Flam closed their eyes and leaned together until their horns touched. A beam, green like molten greed, shot from where their horns met and collided with Starlight’s magic. The two attacks crackled, sparked and popped angrily, but none of the two seemed to be gaining on the other. Then Starlight roared in defiance, pouring even more into her onslaught. Slowly, ever so slowly, she pushed the brothers back. Without thinking, Rarity closed her eyes and leaned into the spell nexus with her own horn aglow. A radiant light flashed on her eyelids. Magic, more than she ever knew she had, rushed up into her horn from every fiber of her body and melded perfectly with the spell the brothers were channeling. For a moment, she just stood there, overwhelmed by the sheer power coursing through her. Then she reaffirmed control over her senses. Slowly, carefully, she let a small strand of her consciousness probe forward, trying to figure out just what spell this was. She gasped when she felt it, a foreign magic brushed gently against hers. Something flashed in her mind, like somepony had started a movie. She saw memories that were not her own, felt feelings from a life she had not lived. It was like flicking through a scrapbook, only there were no pictures but moments, frozen in time and filtered through another pony’s psyche. FLASH! She sat on the floor next to her brother and a monster of gears and cables, a wrench in her magic and a pencil in her mouth. Anxiety, happiness and ambition. FLASH! She pulled the lever and all but gutted the apple tree with her heavy-duty demolition crane. Excitement, ambition and a little bit of malice. FLASH! Her brother smiling radiantly at her with a Parasprite struggling in the long insect net he was carrying. Confidence, eagerness and ambition. FLASH! The strange, alien mind receded and left Rarity disoriented for a moment before she understood what she had seen. She had seen fragments of Flim and Flam’s lives and felt what they had felt in those moments; those precious, defining moments which had made them who they were today.  That was what they were putting into their spell. She did not know what it meant, but she knew what she had to do. She closed off her mind and searched through her memories for those rare moments, those times that defined her as a pony. When she and Suri opened their first boutique in Manehattan. No one thought they would succeed, the two upstart mares from a cheap apartment, but after less than six moons they were on the highway to success. When she, Suri and Hoity Toity were on the cover for the Fashion Flash newspaper. That was when Rarity first saw just how good they were doing. Other ponies spent their lives yearning for that moment, but for them it happened in a year. When she watched her rival’s dress fall asunder on the runway of Fashion Week. That was when she had really became the savvy, urbane business pony she was today. And when she met Flim and Flam in their apartment. The two had awoken something in her, a thirst for more wealth, more status and more respect. A tremor shook her mind, and the pressure of the spell disappeared. Confused, she opened her eyes and saw that the spell was all gone. The only thing left in its wake was Starlight Glimmer, who laid on the floor with multicolored flashes of lightning crackling around her horn. She breathed rapidly and seemed to be unable to lay still. Her legs and tail twitched slightly and the turquoise light of her magic flicked rapidly like a broken flashlight. Her eyes were wide and terrified. ”What did you… we, just do?” Filthy asked just beside Rarity. Apparently he and Suri had joined in too. ”Now, I wouldn’t expect you to know, being an earth pony,” Flam said. ”But unicorn magic is tied to our emotions. The more powerful emotions we feed into our magic, the more power our spells have. Isn’t that so, miss Glimmer?” Starlight remained silent, though she continued to flop around on the floor. Rarity felt a little uneasy seeing it. It looked like she was having a seizure. ”I imagine it was her zeal that made her spells so powerful, her desire for equality.” ”Oh, I get it!” Suri said. ”That’s why Rarity thought about those things, she thought about the strongest emotion we all have in common, m’kay?” ”Our ambition,” Filthy nodded. ”Our ambition was stronger than her zeal, so we fought down her magic.” ”Pretty neat, huh?” Rarity asked with a giddy smile. They had done it, they had actually done it! They had bested Celestia and Starlight! They were at the top of the world! ”Pretty neat,” Flim said while looking at her. ”Never better, in fact,” Flam clarified. He twined his mustache lightly with his magic. ”Stupendous.” ”Simply marvelous.” ”And such a flank!” Flim exclaimed. Rarity felt her cheeks flush in the matter of moments. Part of her wanted to slap the unicorn for such a crude, uncouth, repulsive thing to say, and to her face too! Another treacherous little part of her though… Luckily for her, she did not have to take the decision on her own, for Flam slapped him for her, eagerly followed by Suri. ”Now that I have your attention again, brother,” Flam said matter-of-factly, ”I think we should discuss our next step.” ”Next step?” Suri asked. ”The princess is gone. What more is there, m’kay?” ”Just because the princess is gone doesn’t make us… princes, I guess,” Filthy said. ”The common pony will never accept us just like that. Go on, Flam. What do you propose we do to win them over?” ”For the now, nothing,” Flam said. ”Think of it. With Celestia gone, I think panic will erupt in a matter of days. Nothing like this has ever happened before. I give law and order… about a week. With no leadership it will soon collapse in on itself as everypony with authority scramble for control. I imagine Blueblood and his nobles will try to assert their rule, but most ponies knows he is an idiot, they won’t follow him. However, with our factories, farms, and security forces we can offer our workers food, houses, and order. We will present ourselves as the sole icons of stability in this unstable world. Ponies will flock to us for safety.” Rarity smirked. ”We make the ponies choose us as their leaders. That gives us all the legitimacy we need. Brilliant!” ”Ponies have always been heard animals to some extent,” Filthy said. ”Once a few comes, more will follow. If we pull it off correctly I imagine all of Equestria will fall to their knees and beg us to rule them.” Filthy looked to the unicorn brothers. ”Clever, as always.” ”Thanks,” Flim and Flam said in chorus. ***** Two hours later ***** The castle was deserted save for five ponies, all of them unicorns, moving about on the battlements. Four of them were walking and the last one was being dragged behind them, bound, gagged and with a dark ring clamped around her horn. The bound unicorn thrashed and kicked uselessly on the ground from either fear or anger. Flim was leaning towards the former, but he was unsure. The small party stopped by a tower with a heavy door. Flim and Flam heaved up their prisoner, threw her in and locked the door with the key they had just received. ”There, that should hold her for now,” Flim said and pocketed the key. ”So you did beat Celestia,” Shining Armor asked. ”I will admit I was unsure what to think when I got your letter. But I guess this explains why you wanted me to bring the key to the prison tower.” ”We had a feeling it would be better to keep such a powerful unicorn carefully under lock and key, and since this tower has succeeded in the past…” Flam shrugged. The purple pony at Shining armor’s side mumbled something inaudible and shuffled nervously on her hooves. Flim glanced at her and tried to figure out what was up with her for the seventh time. She had seemed anxious about something whenever they met. She had not spoken more than ten words to the brothers over all the months of preparation, and her eyes were always firmly directed at her own hooves. ”Well, you brought the key as promised,” Flam said, ignoring Shining Armor’s sister. ”But that was just the garnish on the platter. Have you done that other thing we asked? Where does the Canterlot guard stand in this?” ”Did you have any trouble with them tonight?” Shining Armor asked. ”I know you didn’t, and that should give you all the answer you need.” ”Now, now, that won’t do,” Flim said. ”Say it. Admit to what you have done. It will build character to say it loud and clear.” He could see the demand made the guard captain a little uneasy, but nonetheless Shining Armor rolled his eyes and spoke clearly. ”I sent the guard away from the castle against Princess Celestia’s orders. There, are you pleased?” ”Yes, very much so,” Flam said. ”And it speaks greatly about the loyalty of the guard to their captain.” ”And you are sure the guard will remain that way?” Flim asked. ”They are actually loyal to you and not… say for example the Princess?” Shining Armor shook his head. ”Me and many of my colleagues think Celestia only uses the guard as her personal servants. For example we do not have the rights to investigate crimes despite us being more qualified than the regular police force. So instead of helping the common pony she has us watching her eat cake, sleep, and sit on the throne.” ”Why does she need guarding?” Flim asked curiously. He just realized something. ”If she is immortal and you are not allowed to investigate crimes… what do you do, exactly?” ”I have been asking myself that for years,” Shining Armor said acridly. ”Anyway,  most of the guard will be just as happy to be rid of her as I am,” Shining Armor looked at the twins, one after the other. ”Especially if you are indeed going to make good on your part of our deal.” ”Of course we are,” Flam said, smiling. ”We are the most trustworthy ponies in Equestria, me and my brother. But the leader of our secret police force must be able to carry out some… how does one put it…” Flam spun his hoof airily. ”…disagreeable orders.” ”In short, we think a show of your ability would be in order,” Flim said casually. ”Think of it as an aptitude test.” ”What do you want?” Shining Armor asked. ”Well, I heard there was some caves beneath this city strong enough to keep even an alicorn captive.” Flam said lightly. ”Perhaps you could show me? We need someplace to hold the has-been, after all.” Shining Armor nodded. ”Very well. Come with me.” He glanced towards his sister, who cowered slightly, even more nervous now. She tucked her tail close to her stomach and felled her ears in displeasure. ”I’ll be back in just a few minutes, Twily,” Shining Armor said and nuzzled his little sister. He and Flam started walking, leaving only Flim and Twilight on the battlements. ”Now, about that project you have worked with…” Flim said carefully as to not stress the nervous pony. ”It’s done,” Twilight said quickly. She licked her lips and looked over her shoulder to where her brother had gone. ”I’ve built the machine exactly like your blueprints said, and added the levitation spell too.” ”And the last part?” Flim asked with an encouraging look. ”Have you made any progress there? I hate to say it, but you are our last hope on that front. After all, if anypony can do it then it’s you.” Twilight blushed slightly. Flim assumed his infallible charm must have even greater effect on this mare who, by the looks of it, had never left her brother’s side. ”It was tricky, but I got it. I built a case capable of draining the magic from anything placed inside it.” ”I knew we could trust you!” Flim said warmly. ”And you think it will work? If we place… for example something with all of Celestia’s magic inside it, then we should be able to move the sun, right?” ”Theoretically speaking, yea,” Twilight said. She sounded a little more secure. ”The spell is really just classic levitation. That’s much simpler than everything you put in the cider machine. The only thing preventing you from levitating the sun would be the power source, and I still don’t know where you are going to find that. But if you could, then we should be able to move the sun.” ”Arn’t you a clever little pony?” Flim said softly. ”I like that in a mare.” Twilight blushed profoundly. ”Perhaps you would regale me and my brother with a look at your machine? I just so happened to stumble across a fitting power source on the way here. Perhaps we could try it out?” ”Oh, yes!” Twilight said happily. ”Let me just check up on it real quick and then I can show you! Just give me ten -five- minutes!” Twilight turned and trotted away swiftly. It could not be clearer that she had never been more excited. ”Oh, I must prepare my notebook, so many things to record, so much data to gather…!” Flim chuckled and patted the saddlebag where the glass jar with Celestia’s cutie mark was safely tucked away. Once Twilight was well out of sight Flim went up to the prison tower and unlocked it. He stared smugly at the bound, thrashing unicorn before he levitated out the cloth from her mouth. ”She’s a fine mare that Twilight,” Flim said casually while Starlight caught her breath. ”Pity on Rarity, but I have always had a thing for shy mares. And Twilight will be more useful in the long run.” ”You are a playboy too!?” Starlight barked angrily while struggling to free her legs. ”The moment Rarity leaves you are running after somepony else!? How low can you sink!?” ”Oh, I was never serious with Rarity,” Flim explained with a dismissive wave of his hoof. ”In time our new secret police force will make sure she, as well as Filthy and Suri, ends up here with you. As you helped us prove, they are simply too ambitious to keep around. It might take a while to embed our ponies in their companies, but I’m patient.” Starlight paled in anger. ”Are you… are you just going to… YOU ARE BETRAYING YOUR COLLEAGUES TOO!?” ”It’s nothing personal,” Flim said with a shrug. ”They are simply too dangerous. But Twilight on the other hoof… she is perfect. No spine at all and intelligence in spades. Easy to control. Hypothetically, if I married her and had foals with her, then her genius will always be ours.” ”No!” Starlight screamed. Flim saw the blood vessel return. Small sparks popped from her horn as she fought to get loose. ”Nopony will ever side with you profiteers! Nopony will stand for the inequality you plan to create! I promise that when I get out of here-!” Green magic grabbed her tongue and pushed it down. Flim tsked smugly. ”Equality, equality, equality. You know, when you are at the top looking down, equality really is not all it’s cracked up to be. But I’m sure you know that.” Flim chuckled and wiped of the equality sign from Starlight’s flank. ”be seeing you!” He said happily, went out of the cell  and closed the door with a carefree kick. He went back to the alcove and waited for his brother to return. Shining Armor nodded when he and Flam came back. ”Let’s go. We met my sister and she is probably anxious for us to come. She’s worked really hard with that machine.” ”Just one last thing,” Flam said. ”One last thread to tie up.” ”Hmm?” Shining Armor raised an eyebrow. ”We wanted to evaluate your magical abilities too…” Flam said casually. ”…Which is why I did not gag Starlight again after I had a little chat with her.” Flim said. “She must have chewed through the binds around her hooves at this point, and will be working on the horn-” BOOM! Splinters of wood and pieces of plaster flew from the prison tower as a livid unicorn finally got her horn ring off. She waited only a moment for the dust to settle before she slung a radiant beam of turquoise magic at double-crossing brothers. Flim did not see where his brother ended up; all he cared about was getting in behind the shield spell Shining Armor cast out of reflex. The magic beam hit it with a bright sound, causing Shining Armor to grunt and take a few steps back. Flim exhaled in relief; he knew their plan had worked the moment he heard the bright sound. Unlike his and Flam’s way of blocking Starlight, Shining Armor had an actual shield spell, made not only to block but also to reflect. That very moment the attack began to subside and Flim rushed out from behind the shield just as Flam lobbed him glass jar. A moment later, Starlight’s cutie mark was locked inside. Starlight stared at the jar, horror surfacing in her eyes. She stared back to her flank as the color drained form her face. Her legs began to shake as she rubbed her flank, hoping against all hope that it was just the fake cutie mark she saw. ”No, no, nononono…” she whispered frantically when the equality sign did not disappear. ”Not my…! Not...!” She slumped down, unconscious. “You have passed your aptitude test with flying colors,” Flam said heartily to Shining Armor. He took and shook the guard captain’s hoof. ”I am sure you will do a splendid job of safeguarding our new Equestria from threats both without and within.” ”If you would just put Starlight in a new cell for us…” Flim said. Shining Armor nodded, gave a quick salute and magicked Starlight up on his back. Together they went into the castle again. Flim and Flam lingered slightly behind. ”Now that he’s taken out Starlight, we should figure out a way to get rid of the good captain. Without loosing the loyalty of the guard or his sister, of course…” Flim whispered to his brother. “He seems a little to eager to turn on his superiors for my liking. To... ambitious.” ”I already have an idea, brother of mine.”