//------------------------------// // Gotta catch um all // Story: Ponies. Ruin. EVERYTHING! // by TDR //------------------------------// Ponies Ruin Everything! By TDR Gotta catch them all. “Okay Spike, let me see if I understand this.” Twilight stated noting her assistant was barely paying attention to her and was more focused on his new cellphone, and the game on it. “You walk around and these things....” “Pokemon.” Spike corrected without looking up. “Right, these Pokemon appear on the screen and you capture them by throwing the little ball thing. The goal is to collect them all.“ “ Yep that's it.” “That sounds rather pointless. I mean you throw a ball and catch something?”Twilight sighed looking over her own phone.” That's not even really a challenge is it?” “Well yeah but then you can also battle them to take control of gyms. And recently they made raids available.” “Battle them? How does that work?” “Right now it's just taking over gyms and stuff, fairly easy stuff. I mean you can see what other trainers left in the Gym so it's pretty easy to pick a type the others are weak against to fight them.” Spike drones. “Types?” “Yeah, like fire types are weak to water and water types are weak to grass and grass is weak to fire, but then there’s rock types and steel types and fairy types. It gets complex enough before you bring in the IV stuff which adjusts how they level and how strong they get. Lotta math involved......”Spike trailed off looking up from his game at the manic grin on Twilight's face as she read up on the Ivs on her own phone. “Uhhhh, Twilight?” “So basicly there’s hidden data that can be collected from all over and put into graphs to determine the best of everything. Oohh I think I rather might like this game....” “Uh oh.” ================================================== “Hey look a Ponyta!” shouted a voice. “Wha?” Applebloom asked only to get hit in the face with a thrown cell phone. “I don't think that's how you play Sweetiebelle.” Scootaloo commented looking down at the twitching Applebloom. “Yeah, you're right, that method made the Ponyta faint too fast.” Sweetiebelle admitted. “That's not what I ….. is this why your sister threw you out of the house?” “I almost had that Persian too.” Sweetiebelle grumbled. ================================================== “Hey Dashie you enjoying the game too?” Pinkie Pie chimed looking at Rainbow Dash as she fiddled with a phone. “Nah can't play it. Keeps telling me I’m going to fast.” Dash admitted.” If it can't keep up with me then I ain't interested.” ============================================ Rarity had been wandering around town with her phone fiddling with the game Spike had showed her. She wasn't really interested at first until she saw some of the Pokemon. With how some of them looked they gave her a few ideas for new designs and with as popular as the game was they would likely sell too. While skirting the edge of the Everfree forest, noting with some surprise there were a number points of interest in the forest. Though with names like Hydra's stomach, and bog of eternal stench she was wary of going after them. For the moment however she was distracted from the game by the sight of Fluttershy walking along the path towards her. “Oh, yoo hoo Fluttershy darling. How are you doing today dear?”Rarity called out walking towards her a little more briskly. “Oh hello Rarity. What are you doing all the way out here?” The timid pegasus smiled as her friend came closer. “I was just on my way tot he store, but there's an awful lot of ponies out today.” “Oh? Well I suppose since it's such a nice day they must all be hunting Pokemon in that game.” Rarity admitted not quite willing to admit she was also enjoying something so foalish. “Hunting what?” Fluttershy froze her ears flattening to her head. “Oh well not like hunting hunting more like capturing. It is a game called Pokemon Go, a number of ponies seem quite taken with it.” Rarity stated trailing off and taking a step back as Fluttershy started growling. “Pokemon again..... I thought I made it quite clear.........” Fluttershy growled her eyes seeming to blaze in anger. Rarity rather quietly turned off her phone and tucked it into a saddlebag. “Umm are you alright dear?” “No but I will be.” Fluttershy stated with a sudden crack of thunder and flickers of lightning. “My Bad” Derpy calls down from a cloud she was pushing across the sky above them. Rarity blinked noticing that Fluttershy was gone though a nearby bush was shaking. “I think I had best warn Spikey....” Rarity muttered turning to head back to town quickly. =========================================== “ Alright. Each type of Pokemon has a base set of attributes for Stamina, Attack and Defense. Each specific Pokemon is "born" with its own IVs or individual values, that further increase these stats by 0-15 extra points. You cannot change the IVs, not all Pokemon are born equal.” Twilight lists pulling out a graph. “These IVs make small differences in the final power of a Pokemon. For example, the base attributes of a Charizard are 223, 176, 156. This would be the "worst" Charizard available where all IVs are zero. With max IVs, a Charizard would have 238, 191, 171. Each of these Atk, Def and Stam values for Charizard are only 7-10% better.” She continues pulling out a few more charts and a pie graph about her favorite bars and a Bar graph about her favorite pies, with Pinkie at the top of the list. Twilight doesn't seem to notice this. “ Absolute perfection isn't just having the best IVs, the "perfect" Pokemon would have both maximum IVs AND the best Move set possible. Note that your Pokemon's maximum level is governed by your trainer level. To put it simply.” Twilight pulls out another chart reading.... HP = (Base Stam + Stam IV) * Lvl(CPScalar) CP = (Base Atk + Atk IV) * (Base Def + Def IV)^0.5 * (Base Stam + Stam IV)^0.5 * Lvl(CPScalar)^2 / 10 “Note that Pokemon have hidden levels and each level requires two "Power-Ups"...........” Twilight trails off noticing Spike had fallen asleep. =========================== “ FOUL MISCREANT, YOU SHALL NOT WIN!” “Lulu why are you still up?” Celestia asked knocking on her sisters door before pushing it open.” Seriously the whole castle can hear you what is going on?” “Ahh Tia... is it that late already?” Luna blinks looking up from her phone tot he clock. “It is..... are you still playing that game?” Celestia sighed. “We are indeed sister. We have sided with a team. The Mystic faction values knowledge above all else and also Twilight Sparkle has asked me to join them so they must be just. “ “Then what is all the shouting?” Celestia sighed figuring her student would be in this some where. “The castle is what is known as a gym and it has been a hard fight to keep it in Mystic hooves. What is worse the one who continues to battle me has taken my Screen name and made a mockery of it.” “What?” “Mine screen name,for identification, Princess is too long a word so I simply chose P. Luna. This rapscallion has made a mockery of it with his names! Plump Luna, Pest Luna, Puny Luna, and what is worst he has chosen my most hated team, Valor.” “I think you may be taking this a bit too seriously Lulu. You best get some rest , your shift will come sooner than you think.” “Fie on that I will ensure that this … this.... base villain is defeated utterly before I sleep!”Luna growled.” Hah the castle is mine again none can surpass the power of my Vaporion. Darwin “Right well good luck then....” Celestia sighed rolling her eyes as she stepped out and closed the door. Heading down the hall Celestia pauses her horn flaring as she pulls four cell phones out of her mane all running the game. She smirks sending her three alts and her main Cakelover out to attack the Castle gym once more. Her ears perk as she hears Luna screaming again and the Princess of the Sun can't help but giggle. “Go Valor....” ============================= Zecora watched as a number of ponies wandered around the town staring at strange devices and running into each other and things occasionally. “What exactly is going on here, looks like some sort of mind control I fear.” Zecora muttered as she moved around town. “Not hint of a spell, no magic to cut, I suppose I should see.....” Zecora started to say. “LOOK A BLITZLE!” shouted a voice “.....what?” Zecora asked turning and getting plastered in the face with a thrown cell phone and knocked senseless. “Sweetiebelle.......” Scootaloo groaned. ================================================== “Finally.... I've been trying all day to log in.” Button mash sighed looking at the loading screen on his phone with a wide grin. The gamer colt blinked as the bar jumped a little leaning forward over his phone in excitement. Excitement that vanished as the bar hit the last part and the game closed out again. Button quickly hit the reload key only for the screen to show a connection error message. The gamer colt stared and slowly started to shake before tossing back his head and screaming. ================================================== Niantic HQ was rather hectic at the moment. And by hectic it's two whole employees were doing their best to fix the server. “Brother I am not sure I am cut out for this sort of thing.” “Nonsense Flim, it's a game server, simplest thing in the world.” Flam stated. “But it is apparently on fire.” Flim stated pointing a hoof at the battered black column of electronics that was indeed on fire. “Well I suppose we simply need to hit it with the wrench a few more times that should fix it.” Flam stated. “Where exactly did you learn such repair skills brother?” Flim asked. “Why from that wonderful game with all the hats. The engineer fellow in that hit everything with a wrench and it fixed it right as rain.” “Well I can't exactly argue with that logic brother, hoof me the wrench...” Flim stated. Before his brother could respond the door exploded inward showing a very pissed off butter yellow Pegasus holding a large ax in one wing a spiked mace in the other and on her back was a little white rabbit with a large knife clamped in his teeth and a red bandana. “YOOOOU!!!!!!!!” “I believe it is time to run brother.” Flam stated. “Screaming?” Flim asked. “Oh yes, quite a lot of it in fact.” Flam agreed.