//------------------------------// // III – I've Never Kissed a Girl Before // Story: I Didn't Mean to Kiss Scootaloo // by B_25 //------------------------------// ~ III ~ “I've Never Kissed A Girl Before” The month of my recovery was also one of many changes, where relationships both deepened and shifted, that when it came time for me to walk out of that hospital on my own two feet, I knew that I was not the same baby dragon that had been escorted inside. The month afterward, despite being as eventful, had no sudden surprises lurking around. At the risk of sounding like a sissy, I’m quite thankful for that—not sure my heart could handle anymore sudden changes. Well, there was one sudden change, happening the moment I took my second step outside. Something had swept me off my feet, landing me inside the back of a wagon as it sped off—a familiar pink blur pulling us from ahead. Before I could even think to scream, the cart zoomed forward almost at the speed of light, and just as quickly as it bolted—it stopped. My body flew forward from the wagon, past a pair of already opened doors, and into the darkness that was the entrance to the building. A familiar magical warmth embraced me in its aurora as I lost all of my speed, just floating in the air, until the lights came on. “Welcome back, Spike!” Heh, the girls really know how to start a party. I had the chorus of cheers for my recovery, music wafting from the background as everyone mingled with snacks in their hooves. Everyone made it a case to share a word with me, and while I appreciated their concern—saying the same thing over and over was making me go a bit insane. But the worse was when I would have a pack of mares before me, and I had absolutely nothing to say. When it comes to flirting, you could say I'm a bit of a master, but only if I'm speaking to a reflection of myself, and there's no one else in the room. So, as you could guess, any attempts made on me were foiled by my bumbling and my awkward laughter. That, and Scootaloo had been instructed (I'm not quite sure by who) to keep a close watch on my still somewhat weakened state. Apparently, that meant warding off said mares with her eyes alone, and having a private talk with them when she thought I wasn't looking. Of course, I wasn't the only one to have noticed this. Some of the girls watched on with knowing eyes, smiling at the younger mare at work, before looking and fixing me a grin. I got the impression they had and worked immediately to rectify it—for Scootaloo's sake, at least. My efforts to explain the situation, to say the least, were in vain. The girls were more than willing to believe that our relationship had somewhat deepened during her hospital visits, but I would have had a better chance getting a blind pony to see that we were just looking out for each other. Besides, this is Scootaloo we're talking about here. Everyone knows she takes after Rainbow Dash, just like how I take after Twilight. I mean, our interests still mainly line up, and we get each other deeply enough to understand why the other enjoy their interests—but there's no way she would be able to see my personality in that light. I wasn't even sure if I wanted her to see me in that light. Whatever it was we had going on...it was safe. The soothing of our fears lied in our friendship, where we could open up about anything—but opening up on what I may feel about her might end up destroying whatever safe haven either of us had. I wouldn't do that to Scootaloo. Or maybe I wouldn't that to myself. My return home saw to the tides of change finally calming down. That didn't mean there weren't moments where I would ponder at eye-level with a shelf once well beyond my height, or how I had to look down on most ponies to make eye contact, or even trying to sleep with two limbs sticking out of your back. But all wasn't bad. The feeling of being treated as an equal among the girls was probably the greatest of all in my life, all except for one. I went from lazing about in my room with a good comic to taking each of the girls up on their offers—deepening my relationships while I was at it. It turns out Scootaloo wasn't the only one who had another side to them, and I was glad I was able to connect with the girls on a level I was unable to do so before. I honestly felt like my own dragon, and while making decision dictating both my life and my future, I was glad that they still fell upon me. I was soon to learn, however, that some decisions were still out of my control. It happened one day, a month after my discharge, where my afternoons had been spent training underneath Rainbow Dash...and alongside Scootaloo. There's a lot to thank Dash for. Despite not saying so, any and all books on dragon's anatomy were subsequently taken from the library (a charge I made sure not to inform Twilight of), as well as the cyan pegasus curled up with a book on a cloud instead of just napping like she usually did. You could say she was only working hard 'cause the interest of being the first pony to train a dragon, but in all honesty, I think she had taken a liking to a new me and genuinely wanted to help me soar those beautiful blue skies. I wouldn't blame the reader if they believed both to be true. It had come at the end of the month where my wings could flex on their own, lightly taking to the winds with the most jerky of movements. Don't let that description belittle the fact of how euphoric it is to fly—to swim acorss a sky instead of water, freedom and speed taking the forum of your wings. I knew the feeling wouldn't have been as grand if there wasn't another basking in that discovery alongside me. Those over the top cheers always made going to practice worth it. I always loved how Scootaloo scream something from the top of her lungs with no shame whatsoever, because, like always, she meant every word she said. Just a little more training, and we could explore past the horizon, just the two of us. I mean so as friends, of course! The idea of Scootaloo and I becoming closer and stronger together usually caused Dash to squeal, a fact we did our best to swipe underneath the mat. But one day, at the end of my second month in this new stage of life, Scootaloo and I had finished our most advanced session yet with Dash. We all basked in the enticement before going our separate ways, but just as I was going to make my way to the farm, a cyan mare blocked my way. “She likes you, y'know.” I heaved my knapsack over my shoulder as I leaned to the side, fixing Dash with a raised eyebrow. “Of course I know Scootaloo likes me; I like her very much too.” “No, you dumbo,” Dash said with the shake of her prismatic mane, looking up at me from behind those colorful strands. “I mean she likes likes you.” I stood with a mouth hung open, the breeze of summertime wafting over the stretches of grassy plains that had served as our training ground. Air then blew out my mouth as I felt my lips vibrate. “Yeah, and I'm the prince of a long dead dragon society.” Dash huffed up at me as I tried to stumble around her, feeling the dirt of the trail we were on with my feet. And, since it was Dash I was dealing with, I rose my claws in surrender—I may have been taller than her now, and also a dragon, but Rainbow Dash was never one to find such facts about me intimidating. Something I'm grateful for—expect at that moment. “Look, I really don't have time for jokes right now Dash. I'll miss out on supper if I'm late to the farm again.” Dash didn't make a move as I shuffled next to her. However, the next words she spoke were serious enough to freeze me into place. “Is it so hard to believe the little scamp may have a thing for ya?” Finally, the gust of wind came to embrace us both, lifting the strands away from her face as she looked away, as it calmed my rushing state. Inhaling its coolness, I looked back to the mare with a forced smile. “I do.” “Even after you had the town chasing after your tail?” “Well, I mean, Scootaloo isn't really one to go after someone with looks—at least I don't think so. I believe she cares about what kind of pony you're like instead of what you wear or whatever it is you like to do.” “It's funny, y'know?” Rainbow Dash finally turned away from the fresh winds to gaze up at me, offering a smile that's honesty could be seen even from Applejack despite the distance. “That's exactly the reason why I think you two would be great together.” We were like that for quite some time, just looking at one another as the blades of grass kept flowing in a single direction. I knew whatever was to come was far more important than making it to the farm on time, so I sat down on the trail, making it so we were at eye level. “Alright Dash, you got me. Now what do you have going on in the brain of yours think Scoots would remotely like a dragon like me?” “Hmm, well let's see!” Her cyan rump met the ground just as her head looked up, waving a hoof about as she expressed her thoughts. “There's her coming to the library to help around the library just after you were released, talking to her friends and us about you all the friggin time, and even if Scoots isn't all about looks, you can be darn sure a few wandering glances were cast your way.” “Well, that's not the basis for anything!” I said as my arms crossed, giving a slight huff as I did so. “It makes sense that she would want to visit the library more after we truly became friends, that she talks about me because our friendship is still fresh, and that sometimes our eyes just happen to wander—it's happened to me more than once.” Her face flew to before mine. “Ho-oh, do you now?” I quickly looked away. “You know what I mean.” “Whatever you say, coach,” Rainbow sneered as she pulled back, still staring at me with that smug expression. “But deny it all you want—I know there's a connection between you two. Or, at least from her lips.” I lost my breath upon hearing that as my eyes went slightly wide. “Scootaloo...” For whatever reason, my body leaned forward on its own. “Told you she likes me!?” “Now aren't we the excited one,” Dash said as she lightly poked my snout, causing me to reel back. “But yeah, Scoots is crazy about ya kid. I won't lie and say she told me straight up she likes you, but seeing how our conversations lately seem to be about how awesome you're becoming, it's not too hard to guess just what it is she feels.” Dash gave a sigh that was soon captured by the winds, looking up if almost to follow them. “But I won't lie and say that she said it to me directly—Scootaloo may not even know what it is she feels.” Then, she glanced at me from over her shoulder. “When it comes to the two of you, both alone and together, I see potential—and you know how much I hate to see stuff like that wasted.” My breath continued to be lost to me as my body felt incredibly light. I couldn't help but shuffle around, leaving her at my back as I stared out to the almost endless plain of land. “I...see.” Something soft caressed the scales of my shoulder as I felt two hooves drape over my shoulders. Soon, the head of my mentor was almost rubbing next to mine in a weird embrace I couldn't hope to break. “I know...that you've never really been in love before,” she said softly, her face in my peripheral vision as we both stared out into the horizon. “You may have had a crush on Rarity, but this, this is something that's just waiting for you—but the hard part about it is that you have to act on it.” “Yeah...” “Don't think for a second that she's the only one interested though,” Dash said, turning an eye to me as a grin was born down below. “The girls and I have been listening to you drone on her when you should be training and flying. And don't think I haven't caught those gazes you take when you think no one's looking—I've seen how your eyes scan her for injuries when she falls...and the few times you've checked out her flank.” “D-Dash!” “I'm only teasing ya, sport,” Dash giggled for a few moments, more of the breeze whistling through the grass. Then, ever so slightly, her hooves came to either side of my cheeks, and made me face her serious expression. “But in all honesty and all that other stuff, I need to know if Scoots has a chance or not. I can be there for her to help her process those feelings, but I'm not going through that hassle if it just means heartbreak.” My throat clenched as a haze clouded my mind. “Because, as much as I love ya Spike, I would have to beat ya from here to Canterlot if you broke a teenage filly's heart.” Then, I spoke without meaning to. “What makes you think the same won't happen to me?” “What do you mean by that, Spike?” Rainbow Dash said, and when she caught my sigh, it was like she understood immediately what it was that troubled me. I almost didn't feel her drop from my back as she quickly took a seat by my side. Without even being asked to, I opened up again to a mare that wasn't Scootaloo. “I'm not going to lie and say that Scoot's athletic training hasn't left her with a body always worth the look, or that her energetic personality always manages to will me into the mood to get stuff done, and how I can always know, no, feel whenever she's around or not.” “Care to tell me how this isn't already a done deal?” “Because...because I'm a coward,” I said, looking away from the field to stare at the mare sitting next to me on the dirt trail. “I know it's a bit off topic, but for as long as I could remember, I've always wanted to be a hero from my comic books. Part of the reason was because of all the cool stuff they did, but mostly, it was because they always had a Princess to save—someone to always come home to.” “Oooookay?” “That Princess in my mind even took the shape of Rarity when I first saw her—my fantasy just right there, always around me, but still, just a fantasy.” I couldn't help but sigh as the winds tried to calm my beating heart. “Romance has always just been a cool idea in my mind, created by me and managed by me—when my attempts at trying woo Rarity failed, I could always just continue with the Princess inside my head.” “So I'm guessing Scoot's has become your Princess now?” “No,” I said to her, before looking back to the grass, “and that's exactly what makes her so...scary. Scootaloo is here, in reality, wanting now to go on a date and explore a relationship I've only fantasized about.” My head dropped underneath the weight of my anxiety. “The very fact that I could get with somepony else scares me to death, and I'm not quite sure why. I know that I shouldn't be afraid, that ponies get together and break apart every day, but I can't help but feel my heart go numb whenever I ponder that possibility with her.” “Is that...is that the reasons why you haven't taken up any of those mares on their offers?” I nodded. “And I'm afraid that the reason why I don't see it working with any of those mares is the same reason why it won't work with Scoots. We're just, so different...I'm not sure if we would last—that if she would grow bored of me or if I may weigh her down.” I looked up to Dash from my crossed elbows—I must have looked like I reverted to being a baby again. “I have no clue what I should do, Rainbow Dash, even more than when I grew five feet and sprouted wings.” “Hmmm.” Dash watched my expression for a few moments longer, as if to see if I was being genuine or not. Then, her head dipped in thought, keeping us in our position as the sun began to dip behind the mountainous horizon. “Go in head first.” My wrists moved away from my face as I exposed myself to her. “Huh?” Rainbow Dash struck a pose, an aroma of confidence exuded effortlessly from her, as I knew now why Scootaloo took such inspiration from her. I felt my light body gain weight as I looked upon her posture, only being filled more once she spoke. “I understand your feelings perfectly and in no way do they make you a coward—the fact that you're able to admit them shows that you've come a long way, Spike.” The golden rays of light caught her features in its brilliance; her face lit up by it. “Try to remember that Scootaloo has come a long way as well, and you're not on this weird trajectory alone. Scootaloo has never liked-liked a pony before, except for you now.” I felt a bit of that golden light shine on me as well. “I think you know better than anyone that Scootaloo would never try to hurt you intentionally, but that's not a guarantee that it will never happen,” she said, beginning slowly to retract to her normal posture. “Scootaloo is right there next to ya, ready to jump into the unfamiliar with ya, all to learn those scary things you can't learn alone. Overthinking and fantasizing about romance are all just second guesses, while charging in head first will reveal the real deal to the both of you.” Slowly, I felt myself rising to my feet. “The best part about exploring that unknown road is that you have an awesome girl like Scoots to back you up and vice versa.” Dash said as she took a step towards me, both of us standing before the other. “You don't have to act right away, but at the same time, you shouldn't expect all glances at her flank to be free forever.” Rainbow Dash gave a shake of her own flank, causing the epic moment to be deflated in an instant, as I couldn't but slump as she began to giggle. Before I knew it, her wings flexed open, and in the next, she was but a streak in that same horizon we had been looking at together. I was already plenty late, so I began to make my way to the Apple's farm. My eyes were never drawn away from the horizon—for I saw the image of Scoots and me having a picnic on its plains, looking out to the horizon. I could feel my heart beating just looking at that image alone, and I did not know if that was a good thing or not. Scootaloo didn't leave my mind for the next few days, our memories playing on repeat as I would soar through the blue sky. Straining yourself to fly at the fastest speed possible made the same possible with your thinking, the constant winds soothing me as I probed the depths of my feelings. The only problem was that I was thinking about the same things over and over. There wasn't any need to wonder if I liked Scootaloo because I already knew I did—and it looked to be the same the other way around. I had an idea of where a relationship like ours may lead to, but no amount of thinking would ease the trail. No matter how many times I thought about it, the conclusion was always the same. Rainbow Dash was right; I needed to see Scootaloo. As my luck would have it, I wasn't the only one who was using flight to clear their mind. Out in the horizon, I spotted an orange blur among the clouds, directing my course so that we both were on the same trajectory. My heart swelled as her form gained clarity. There would be no backing out, no saying hi just to quickly say bye. Whatever it was we had between us, the feelings we hid at our depths—we would explore those together again, like those nights we spent inside the hospital walls. Scootaloo was saying something into the winds as she was looking away, not looking to where she was flying as our paths were quickly coming to collide—a flying mistake that would get a smack on the head from Dash. “Scootaloo!” My voice drew her attention towards me as she quickly fixed me with a confused expression and the blink of the eyes. Her lips mouthed my name, and I couldn't help but nod with a smiled admits the same winds. And then...it happened. The moment that keeps playing in my mind like a broken record playing, rearrange my heart in paradoxical ways every time I've forced to remember it again. What was to come next was meant to simplify our feelings so that they were better understood—what ended happening just complicated the matter in a way I had never thought possible. Just as we were coming to break with our wings to slow our momentum, a familiar pet showed itself through the clouds and caught Scoot's attention. She was so surprised at seeing it that she didn't stop her flight, causing her body to be flown onto mine. I was too surprised to do anything as my body went limp, our momentum crashing into one another's. And then, that tortoise decided he would like to be in on the fun as it too came crashing into us—or rather, into the back of Scootaloo's head. I felt her sharp intake because her lips had fallen into mine, so sudden and alien, yet wonderful despite its bareness. I had felt what lips were like only on my cheeks, and feeling them against mine was quite possibly the strangest feeling of all, and I don't mean that in a bad way. Our eyes were open with shock upon the immediate intimate contact, fully present as to fully intake every sensation our bodies could experience. This left our bodies in a limpness blind, and with no wings to support us, we began our descent to the grassy plains that awaited us below. The wind began to hurl at us as if we had entered a slipstream of our own. The fading image of the tortoise flew away from beyond half of the face of the mare plummeting so close to me, whose eyes seemingly closed on their own as all shock and fear were stripped from her face. She pressed her lips further into mine, and without the assistance of gravity. It should be said, that in that terrifying moment born of so many reasons, that not a single thought or worry was on my mind. I think Twilight would be mad if she read that I had done nothing immediately to prevent our possible deaths, but I was far too lost in the embrace to care about worldly things. My arms lifted on their own, wrapping around the smaller mare and keeping her close to my chest. I had always wanted to hug her just a little bit tighter, to feel the softness of her tummy upon my chest, and my present situation had finally allowed for me to do just that. Another thing that had happened, something that I had forgotten until now that makes me wanna kill myself, is that I pressed my lips against her as well. That kiss that tore through the clouds and the mist was something my instincts always wanted, and I was stupid to let my fears get in the way of the purest thing I had experienced so far in my life. Despite our lip and body lock, my wings soon sensed the coming ground below us, and pulled open with a mighty flap—subtracting all the momentum I had gained as the small flaps afterward allowed us to hover just a few feet above the field. Slowly, I felt her lips leave mine as she leaned back in my arms. She looked up at me from the cover of her mane as I looked down at her eyes of the same confusion and fear—glistening all the same. The moment my feet touched the ground I was quick to let her do the same. And that's how that day ended. Both of us standing on that lonesome trail, looking at each other with eyes filled with such confusion, with our hearts pounding in such a way that was painful yet beautiful. Our staring match carried on for a few moments longer; I was standing on two feet while she on four, before we both turned around, and made our way home. The fact that the girls weren't surprised when I asked for a week to myself was enough to tell me that the secret was out. I should be glad that nopony said anything, but not that I think about it, some criticism might have done me some justice. Just like before, thinking in my bed did little to bring me any avail. Why was Scootaloo my first kiss? Those things are a one-time deal, being given to a pony that you know absolutely to be the one, and the way that it's supposed to happen is deliberate and romantic. I guess falling to our deaths suits a girl like Scootaloo better anyway. But, the thing is that dragons are known for their greed, stealing from other to amass their hoard—just how did Scootaloo feel about having her first kiss stolen by some dragon? My feelings grew hazy with every day that passed as the cloud of uncertainty grew thicker over the library. I wasn't sure what it was I supposed to be feeling, what the proper course of action was supposed to be. I knew now that making decisions were up to me, and that filled me with all the more dread on what to do next. It wasn't before long that having pebbles and other subjects became a daily occurrence. “Spike, we know you're in there. Get out now!” Obviously, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle weren't happy about what had happened between their friend and me. Fortunately, Twilight was always there to stop the girls before things got too progressive, and this encounter served to be no exception. “That's enough girls,” Twilight said as I watched her step outside from my window, cowering from just below the counter. “Spike already has enough on his mind even without whatever happened between him and Scootaloo. I promise that, once he's had a little more time to himself, he'll be willing to talk to you girls.” “Later ain't good enough!” Applebloom said as she stepped before the older mare, almost now matching her height. “Ya should see how wound of Scoot's is after what happened—I've never seen her this sad or confused in my life! I think Spike has time enough to get over whatever hump he's on.” “The only one who can be sure of that is Spike himself,” Twilight said, rubbing her hoof as she looked away, and then sighing. “Look, if I promise to talk to Spike about it today, will you give him just a little more time.” Applebloom went to speak with an angry expression, but Sweetie had beat her to it. “Do you promise?” “I pinkie swear.” Sweetie's gaze fell upon her friend for a moment, then to Twilight, and then, unfortunately, at the window I had been peering from. I'm not sure if she saw me as I quickly ducked into cover, hearing their faint voices from my height. “Okay, we'll keep Scootaloo company for just a little longer. But you better not break your promise.” “I won't, girls. Give Scootaloo my all.” “Focus on giving your all to Spike first.” And just like that, they were gone for just a little longer. A heard the door close, another sigh carried up the hall just like the hoof-steps after, and then, an all too familiar knock on my locked door. “Spike...are you awake in there? May I come in?” “Yeah, I'm awake.” My back peeled from the wall as I stood to my full height, cutting the distance between me and the door, and unlocking it to the sight of the lavender alicorn behind it. She flashed me up a smile. “Mind if I come in?” I stepped out of the way. “Knock yourself out.” In but a few moments, we found ourself in our usual positions. Twilight would come into my room and analyze the way how I had everything set up and put together, while I would just crash in my bed, and relish in the sound of another in my room. Of course, this silence never lasted long when there was something to be discussed. I always wondered why Twilight, a mare that always liked to cut to the root to everything to get as close as the purest truth possible, would always wait those few minutes to begin our sessions. But to be honest, I was always thankful she granted me that small window of time to relax. Maybe that was the reason. “It looks like you finally got your room to the way you wanted to, huh?” Twilight said as she strolled by my small collection of books, smiling at the covers. “It wasn't before long that we were sharing a room—now you've got a bed instead of a basket, and the room itself is revealing to the character you're becoming.” “Is that a good thing?”' “As long as your room's not a mess, then it's fine with me.” “You're one to talk, Ms. Study All Night and Leave Books Littered Across the floor.” “Hey!” We stared at each other from our spots, my eyes calm while hers were alight, before our lips came spewing with laughter. Even though she was a Princess now, nothing would ever stop me from teasing Twilight Sparkle. “Whatever you say, Mr. Hot Stuff.' I guess that, even if I were to grow into a normal sized dragon, that Twilight would still go on to tease me about my weight. Another relationship I had been blind to was ours, where no matter what we became, we always had the other to tease and remind us who we were. New form or not, I was thankful to have a friend like Twilight Sparkle. “Hey, Spike?” “Yeah, Twilight?” “I know I said you could take all the time you needed to process your feelings, but please, just try to remember, that every day that passes could be one that's hurting her.” “I know.” I sighed, finally turning my head to face her fully. “But I'm still just so clueless as to what it is I feel, and I can't act unless I'm being honest with myself what it is I want to do. I don't suppose that big mind of yours can offer any help?” Twilight's lips stretched into a soft smile as she began to approach my bed, taking a seat at its very end. “Hmm, I guess I could do my usual thing where I assess both of your deepest beings, compare the compatibility of your interests, and assess just what unconscious forces are at play here.” I stared at her with those same calm eyes, but underneath it all, my heart pumped as if the answer I desired could be processed quite so easily by her ingenious mind. “But you should know better than anyone, Spike, that no matter how much time that I put into research, of thinking and analyzing and putting together the pieces you may not have even considered—that whatever answer I come up with will always be inferior to the one that you discover for yourself.” Along her speech, Twilight slid down the length of my bed. “I can boil romance down to a science, but only by you acting can value and meaning be added to it. Whatever choice it is you feel like you have to make, just know I'll be behind you, all along the way.” I couldn't help myself from taking her into my embrace. I held her close as the other being I really needed at the moment, because I needed to know that someone else would be there for me. Any other dragon would take shame in such thoughts, but I had only pride in the friends that I had. “Even with those wonderful words, Twilight,” I said into the crook of her neck as she leaned her head upon my shoulder, lightly nuzzling it, “my feelings are still scrambled, and all that has happened feels like one hazy blur.” “The way we feel about things is often derived from our reaction to those said events," Twilight whispered into my ear, as our fur and scales rubbed together. “It's impossible for you to act now, but maybe you didn't experience those events like you should have when they happened.” “It's a bit late to go back in time now.” “But it's not too late to revisit those events in that mind yours,” Twilight said as she pulled away, planting a small kiss on my cheek before pulling away. She returned to her hooves and began to walk away. “You keep obsessing over my mind but never any time to maintain yours. Maybe if you were to focus on yourself a bit more, you'd find yourself in a better place.” “And just how do I do that!” I shouted at her, making her pause at the door to my room. Slowly, she turned her head back towards me, and flashed both a smile and a wink. “You've been taking notes after me your whole life—maybe if you start doing the same for yourself, you'd know what it is you feel.” And just like that, she was out of my room. “There's already a journal in the basement whenever you're ready, and chain and lock in case you'd rather be left alone.” And just like that, we've come to where this story began. That hectic blur finally put to paper in a straight line. All those moments that meant the most to me slowed down and examined. I know that there's a lot I've yet to put down, the wonderful moments spent with my friends and nurses, and the extent of my recovery. I now know that Twilight desired for this to be a letter to the Princess, my feelings turned into a friendship letter—which I can't even be mad about, as it has helped me relive these moments at a slower pace, and forced what I felt about them to become concrete as I wrote them down. Sometimes, slowing down important moments evokes the feelings you should have felt then, or at least, just what it is you felt then. I still can't help but feel like a coward since life was thrust into my claws, while Scoots has been there the entire way, taking everything in stride. She always warded off my fears with her special kind of warmth, and we connected on a level I had never before achieved with Twilight. Girls may be scary to me. Relationships' terrifying. But Scootaloo has always been there for me, and she deserves the same. Regardless of what happens next, if you're reading this, know that all of this writing has resulted in a single revelation to me. I love you, Scootaloo, and you're worth taking the risk.