Lunar Rising

by azore24


Chapter 5

Town Hall was decorated in splendid style for the Summer Sun Celebration. The main chamber was decked out in blue ribbons with yellow trim, in addition to burgundy curtains in all the archways which led to different parts of the building. Tapestries hung from the banisters, honoring the sun and moon as well as symbols of less obvious significance. Flowers hung down from their pots which supported the middle of a number of banners. Everything was arranged to draw the viewer’s attention to a grand balcony, presumably where the Princess would appear.

Mayor Mare gave an approving nod to the decorations as she walked across the room. She led SG-1 through one of the curtained doorways below the grand balcony and into a short hallway. Looking around, O’Neill saw two doors and a stairwell in the dimly lit hallway. It was also crammed full of tables, desks, chairs, and those little moveable posts with strings attached they used in movie theaters to mark the lines outside the box office. Jack always liked those things.

The mayor brought the team through one of the doors and into what was assumedly her office. “Now,” she said, walking around her desk, “just give me a minute to find the papers you’ll need.” Mayor Mare began to dig through her desk, pushing aside crumpled notes and old documents. After a minute she brought up her forehooves to aid in the search and moved on to the filing cabinet which sat against the wall. Inside the cabinet lay folders at all angles filled haphazardly with many colored papers.

The mayor leaned further into the black storage unit, completely burying her head and neck as files flew out of the cabinet and onto an ever growing pile in the corner of the room. The tossed objects rapidly increased in variety; horseshoes, apples, and even an accordion were apparently kept in the impossibly small filing cabinet.

“Oh, where could they possibly be?” muttered Mayor Mare as a chicken joined the accordion in the pile. The added clutter made the already cramped room feel even smaller, especially with the four members of SG-1 hunched over to avoid the low ceiling.

“Oh, ponyfeathers!” swore the mayor. As if in response, the door to her office opened and a grey pony with a pale blue mane poked his head in.

After a surprisingly stoic glance at the chaos in the office, he sighed and greeted the mayor in a tone which could easily be mistaken for a friendly one. “Ah, Mayor,” he said, “I thought you would be out of office all day. Then I heard the commotion outside, so I figured you’d be in here soon enough.”

“Ah, Buck Shtoffer,” said Mayor Mare with a rather thick folder still in her mouth. “Do you know where the temphorary vishash are?” She spit the file out onto the pile which had somehow become taller than the cabinet itself.

“Mayor,” said Buck Stopper, “the princess removed them from the law nearly two years ago. I’m sure the memo is somewhere in all this.”

O’Neill let his head hang for a moment, shocked that the mayor would forget something like that. “D’oh,” he said. The whole sequence really did feel like something out of the Simpsons.

Buck Stopper shot a look over his glasses at the fablunged mare and continued, “Are these the creatures I’ve heard so much about?”

“That depends,” said O’Neill, “what have you heard?”

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes’,” said Buck Stopper. “So, assuming you aren’t here to steal us stallions away, what exactly brings you here?”

“Science, friendship, really old stuff,” said Jack, trying very hard to match the deputy mayor’s tone. “Mayor Mare knows all about it, I’m sure she can fill you in once we go.”

“Mayor,” said Daniel, “if we don’t need any paperwork to go into town, could we head over to the library? Cheerilee is going to help us with some research on your planet, and I’d like to learn as much as I can before the Summer Sun Celebration.”

“If you plan to study at the library,” said Buck Stopper, “I’d suggest you get on it quickly. Pinkie just decided that we’ll be holding the pre-party there tonight.”

“Thanks, we’ll do that,” said Daniel. “Uhh,” he added after a moment of looking around, “which way is the back door, again?”

After a quick set of directions and a couple minutes of wrong turns and indecision, as well as Daniel gawking over every tapestry as if they held the secret to the incredibly interesting pony culture, SG-1 made its way out of the Town Hall. While the street they found themselves on wasn’t exactly designed with stealth in mind, it was fairly deserted. The only pony to be found was Cheerilee, who was passing time by kicking a rock around the deserted street.

“Oh, that was quick,” said Cheerilee in surprise.

“It turned out we didn’t need the papers after all,” said Carter. “It was lucky that Buck Stopper checked in, or we could have been there all night.”

“Heh,” laughed Cheerilee, “he does keep the government running. The mayor’s much better at PR, though. For all their differences, they make a great team.” O’Neill couldn’t help but feel like there was an important life lesson Cheerilee was trying to teach someone.

“Indeed,” said Teal’c. “Buck Stopper also suggested that we begin our research shortly. It seems the library will be holding a party tonight.”

“That must be the party Daisy told me about,” said Jack. “Who is this ‘Pinkie’, anyway?”

“Pinkie’s, well, uhh,” said Cheerilee, sighing, “the best way to describe Pinkie Pie is that she’s Pinkie Pie. ‘A pink fuzzy ball of sugar high-induced joy and frivolity that never, ever, ever stops’ is another way to do it. It’s her personal mission to make everypony she meets smile, and I haven’t heard of her failing yet. Though, at times she has gone to some pretty ridiculous lengths to get those smiles.”

“So I should watch out for falling anvils and pianos, then?” asked Jack.

“Jack, I don’t think Cheerilee was referring to schadenfreude. You weren’t, right?” asked Daniel, though he didn’t sound too unsure.

“While I’ve never heard of schadenfreude, I don’t think she’s ever done anything that could hurt anypony, intentionally, at least. The most dangerous thing she has is her party cannon, and maybe her welcome wagon.” A smile broke out on Cheerilee’s face as she said, “and maybe her cupcakes if somepony forgets to brush their teeth after eating.”

“Well, what’s so bad about that? A little bit of fun never hurt anyone, right, Teal’c?” Jack said, patting the Jaffa on his shoulder. Teal’c merely raised an eyebrow at O’Neill, who then decided it best to remove his hand.

The group quickly made its way to the library, a small miracle considering the mob that had slowed their progress the last time they walked through town. On the short trip there they managed to avoid running into any pony at all. The building itself was a sight to behold; a tree had been grown up large and strong enough to be the building itself. The door was emblazoned with the image of a lit candle and covered by an awning of moss. The remains of secondary trunks were now balconies with glass windows. The upper stories, it looked like there were at least three, were built into the main trunk. Some windows, though, looked like they were built into the leaves themselves. All told, it was an impressive sight to behold. One, thought Jack, which would take a forest of sequoias and a few years of practice to do back on Earth.

“Welcome to Ponyville Public Library,” said Cheerilee as she pushed open the Dutch door, leading SG-1 inside. The ground floor of the library had one main room which was surprisingly spacious for the size of the tree it was built out of. The walls of the tree had been carved into bookshelves and stuffed full of hardcovers. The center of the room was dominated by a round table grown, apparently, out of a stump on which sat a carved horse’s head. Four smaller tables, reading stands or lecterns really, were arranged in two sets of opposites. Across from the door was a staircase leading to the upper stories.

The main room managed a nice, homey feeling while simultaneously making Jack consider exactly how painful splinters could be. His other favorite thing about the library was that, beyond the door which he nearly needed to crawl through, the ceiling was high enough and the room spacious enough that he didn’t feel like a giant with an ever increasing number of bumps to the cranium.

“Looks like this ‘Pinkie’ has already started setting up,” said Carter in reference to the box of streamers and confetti sitting on the table.

“Oh, sweet Celestia, this is going to be a crazy party,” breathed Cheerilee.

“How can ya tell?” asked Jack. “She’s only got one box of decorations so far.”

“Exactly! Pinkie’s already started setting up, and it’s still at least two and a half hours until the party starts.” While O’Neill could tell Cheerilee was speaking in earnest, he found it hard to believe that setting up only a few hours before one of the biggest parties of the year was something out of the ordinary.

Daniel, Carter, and Teal’c went with Cheerilee to peruse the shelves. On a whim, Jack went with Daniel, who split off from the others.

“Here, hold this,” said Daniel, handing Jack a medium sized book written in the aliens’ language. Almost without thinking, Jack took hold of it.

“So, Daniel,” said O’Neill as more tomes piled up in his arms. “Just some light reading before the party?”

“What?” asked Daniel. “Oh, right. Sorry.” He stepped away from the bookshelf and took half of the books he’d given Jack. The two walked over to the central table, where they placed all of Daniel’s chosen books.

Jack picked one off the top of his pile and said, “Hmmm... squiggle, frowny face, backwards ‘e,’ triangle... yes, this is one of my favorites.”

Daniel sighed, “I didn’t know you were such a connoisseur of alien recipes.”

“You know me, Daniel, always willing to try something new,” responded Jack while carelessly dropping the book back onto the table.

“Yes, I remember you telling me how much you love hay and grass. I’ll fix you a salad when we get back.”

“Har har har,” said Jack in a deadpan. Deciding to change the subject, he said, “So, what did that unicorn find so interesting about your fingers?”

Daniel paused for a moment, making that face he made when trying to remember something. “Oh,” he said, “you mean Lyra? We got on a discussion of music, and it turns out that she plays the lyre. I was just telling her that we have it on Earth too, so she asked how we can play it without magic. I was showing her how hands work; she seemed really interested in them.” After a pause, Daniel’s eyes lit up in a way Jack knew meant he was about to be losing the conversation.

“And what exactly did you do to make those mares run away in terror?” Daniel’s face was filled half with genuine satisfaction at one-upping Jack, and half with dread that he had actually done something terrible.

“Nothing,” said Jack, though Daniel didn’t seem to be convinced. “Nothing, really! All I did was joke around with one of them. She thought we were Maresians here to steal their Stallions, you see.”

“And you just played along with it?”

“No, I denied it entirely. Then I played along with it, her friends didn’t get the joke, I guess. They did seem a bit skittish.”

“Jack, you do know we’re trying to forge strong, lasting, and, most importantly, friendly bonds, right?”

“Since when has a joke ever hurt diplomatic ties?”

“Do you want a list? Because I can give you one.”

Jack grunted in response and said, “Well, Daisy got it at least. And Buck Stopper didn’t seem to really think that we were here to steal him away, so I wouldn’t worry too much.” O’Neill noticed Cheerilee leading Teal’c and Carter to the table. “So, find anything you like,” said Jack in a parental tone.

“We have found several texts of interest, O’Neill,” said Teal’c.

“Before you start reading, we should probably go to the side room,” said Cheerilee. “If Pinkie’s setting up the party in this room, there’s no way you’ll be able to learn. Besides, the book of Luna tales should be in the foals section in there.”

The group moved into the side room through another uncomfortably short door. The side room was smaller than the main chamber, and had a lower ceiling too. Jack was still able to stand upright, but he came dangerously close to the ceiling. It was a bit of a disconcerting feeling. The walls held more carved bookcases which were stuffed to capacity. A few of the reading stands dotted the walls and a window looked out onto the street behind the library, letting in the waning sunlight.

Daniel sat down cross-legged at one of the lecterns near the window and began to read. Cheerilee helped Carter through a school text on magical science while Teal’c took the opportunity to meditate. It was necessary for him to enter a deep meditative state, Jack knew, to maintain his health. Jack also knew that he didn’t take kindly to pranks pulled during one of these kel’no’reem sessions. Basically, for lack of anything better to do, the Jaffa was taking a nap.

For himself, Jack had nothing to do. Daniel would probably be happy to talk his ear off about the local culture, but there was no way O’Neill would subject himself to that. At first, he joined Carter and Cheerilee. The discussion was at a low level, so there weren’t any pretentiously fancy words, but even at the grade school level, Carter was Carter. She began to start talking scientific mumbo jumbo and writing equations on the notepad she carried with her.

All too quickly, Jack found himself sitting at the lectern next to Daniel’s, slamming his face into an open book. He’d decided to look over the text, because why not, and came to the conclusion that he had absolutely no idea what it said.

“I’m so bored,” whinged Jack to no one in particular.

Daniel, being the closest at hand, took it upon himself to respond. “So why don’t you go take a walk or talk to the locals. That’s what you normally do about now. Actually, I’m surprised you stuck around so long.”

“Yeah, well, I think if I went out again I’d be crushed in a stampede of curious ponies,” said Jack flippantly. Just as the words left his mouth, a series of festive pops and whizzes sounded from the main room. “On second thought,” said Jack, “meeting some locals could be fun.” He stood up and went to the door.

Upon opening the door, he was assaulted by a wave of sound, confetti, and streamers. He blinked a few times, trying to determine exactly what caused the blast. Instead of the party-themed cannon he was half-expecting, all he saw was a particularly pink pony with balloons for a cutie mark. Her mane and tail were poofy and pink, though of a darker shade than her coat.

“You must be the infamous Pinkie,” said Jack. The pink mare lifted her head out of a bag of party goods and turned towards O’Neill. As soon as she saw him, she lept in the air and hung there for a handful of seconds with her mouth gaping open and eyes wide. Jack really couldn’t get used to the wild contortions these ponies could put their bodies through.

Pinkie Pie gasped as she hung in the air before speeding off towards the exit. Halfway there she froze in the air and began to waver back and forth. A second later, she fell back to the ground with a decided lack of grace. Quicker than O’Neill could follow, she was back on all fours and approaching him with the most exasperated expression Jack had ever seen.

“Ugggh,” said Pinkie Pie, “here I am planning a super special surprise party slash Summer Sun Celebration soiree and you go and ruin the surprise! I mean, come on!”

Jack was taken completely aback by Pinkie’s brief tirade. So flummoxed was he that he couldn’t find a retort before Pinkie started up again. “Well, since you’re here anyway, why don’t you help me with the party? I’ve got streamers and balloons and confetti and sarsaparilla and hot sauce and cupcakes and --”

“Yes,” said Jack cutting off the unbroken list of party goods, “I can see that. So, what sort of help do you need? Decorating the ceiling?”

“No, silly. That part’s easy,” said Pinkie. As if to prove her point, she reached up to the ceiling and somehow tied off a streamer to the matte surface. While Pinkie Pie moved to tie off the streamer in more places along the ceiling, she said, “Why don’t you set up the drinks on the table? I usually do it, but for some reason nopony wants to drink them. I mean, I know the drinks are good, I taste them all to make sure!”

“So Pinkie,” said Jack, “who is the super special surprise party for? It seems like most ponies in town already know about it.”

“Of course they know about it! How else could there be a surprise? I mean, having no one pop out and shout surprise wouldn’t nearly be as fun as getting the whole town to do it.”

“I get that, I really do,” said O’Neill, “but won’t the guest of honor find out if everyone’s talking about it?”

“Oh, no. She’s new in town, so it’s pretty safe. Besides, Twilight’s going to be busy all day checking on the Summer Sun Celebration and most of the preparation is being done outside of town, so the secret’s safe. Besides, everypony Pinkie promised not to tell, and NOPONY breaks a Pinkie promise.” There was a flash of fire in the mare’s eyes as she said the last clause.

“What makes these ‘Pinkie promises’ so binding,” O’Neill asked as he started to lay out a few goblets with the drinks. Pinkie stared at him in confusion for a moment, clearly not getting Jack’s question. “Like how Cheerilee and Mayor Mare both trusted us immediately once we made Pinkie promises.” Then, suddenly, Jack was hit by a wave of realization and said, “wait, is the Pinkie promise named after you?””

“Who else would they be named after?” asked Pinkie Pie. “I haven’t heard of any other Pinkies, and I know everypony in Ponyville, so there can’t be anypony else for it to be named after.” Trying to follow the motormouthed mare’s logic was sort of like trying to follow Daniel or Carter when they got really deep into an explanation: doable, but quite difficult. He found Pinkie Pie’s brand of confusingly dense chatter more palatable, if only because she was not a scientist.

“Yeah, I suppose that makes sense. What I really want to know is what consequences are there for breaking a Pinkie promise. I mean, what makes you the patron saint of oath-keeping?”

“Oh, I’m not one of those whatchamacallits. I’m just friends with everypony in Ponyville, and breaking a promise to a friend will lose their trust, and that’s the fastest way to lose a friend FOREVER.” Pinkie seemed like she was trying to be as imposing as possible on the last word, but it didn’t really work for O’Neill. The sentiment was just too naive to be taken seriously. Sure, certain promises were inviolate, but the strict dichotomy that Pinkie seemed to see just wasn’t there.

O’Neill didn’t argue the point, though; philosophical discussions with aliens were never good ideas, and this particular subject didn’t warrant the stress he was sure would follow. Instead, he said, “ah, I see,” and began to set up the foodstuffs on the table.

A few minutes into it, having chatted lightly with Pinkie, mostly about the party to come, O’Neill finished with all the food and drinks. “Hey, Pinkie,” he said, “how’s it look?”

“Hmmmmmmm,” said Pinkie Pie as she scrutinized the table. Finally, she said, “it looks good! Except for this,” she pointed at the hot sauce, “it should go over here,” she pointed at the assortment of drinks.

“You do know that this is hot sauce, right?” asked O’Neill.

“Well duh, won’t it be hilarious if somepony accidentally drinks it?”

Jack smiled mischievously, “well,” he said, “if that’s the sort of party you’re looking for, allow me to make a few suggestions.