//------------------------------// // Chapter 6: Space Oddity // Story: MIA // by Gravitys Rainboom //------------------------------// Space Oddity It was raining that morning in Ponyville. The sky was an ugly gray color, and a light drizzle was soaking the town as a thick fog descended upon the village. The rain had turned the town’s streets into rivers of mud, and massive puddles of water could be found in almost every inch of the community. The village had become a veritable swamp. Had the water been of a more brownish tint then the streets would have looked remarkably similar to Froggy Bottom Bog. The townsfolk were dismayed to find their village in such a state; particularly a certain dressmaker, who refused to leave her home lest she risk sullying her spotless shop with her most dreaded nemesis: mud. Yet, despite the weather, the residents of the town all marched out of their homes, headed to their respective places of employment, and hoped for the best. But there was no sunshine to greet the ponies of Ponyville that morning. No warmth. No singing birds. No smiling faces. Just the color gray, and a cold dampness that found its way into everypony’s bones. It was by far the worst day of the year, and a certain purple unicorn couldn’t help but see it as a rather ominous sign. Twilight had awoken that morning to the sensation of water dripping on her forehead, a rather annoying thing to wake up to in her opinion. She reluctantly cracked open her eyes and lazily rolled onto her back. She looked up to her ceiling to try and find the source of the water. Much to her irritation, a small hole in the roof directly above her head was the culprit. Great, that’s just what I need right now, thought the purple unicorn. Twilight looked around the room and was disappointed to find that there was still a rather large hole in her floor, leading down to the bottom level of the library. She had been hoping that all of the events that occurred the night before had been a dream. Alas, this was not the case. The lavender mare got off her nearly destroyed bed and walked to the window. She parted the curtains to try and get a view of outside. Glad to see the weather’s nice at least, she thought sarcastically. A quiet groan snapped her out of her thoughts and she lightly made her way to the foot of her crushed mattress. Spike was tossing and turning in his small basket. His eyes were closed and he was mumbling something under his breath. After Twilight had locked herself in her bedroom last night, she had found Spike passed out in a corner of the room. It didn’t take the mare long to figure out that he had probably fainted from shock. Twilight tried to wake him up but that quickly proved futile. He was out cold. Instead, she resigned herself to simply carry Spike to his little bed and let him sleep it out. She then made her way to her own bed, but was horrified to find that it was completely destroyed. Too tired to care, she just flopped on the now lumpy mattress and quickly fell into a deep sleep. Now the lavender mare stood over her little brother, yawning as she prepared herself to wake him. A petty pony might see this as an opportunity to get revenge for having been woken up so rudely the day before… “OHMYGOSHSPIKEYOUHAVETOWAKEUPNOWBECAUSEINEEDYOUTOWAKEUP!!!” …and Twilight was such a pony. With a loud yelp, Spike jumped up a few feet in the air and whipped around to glare at his foster sister. “Twilight, what the hay!?” Twilight couldn’t help but giggle. “That’s for waking me up yesterday.” The young dragon cracked his back and rubbed his eyes. “Just as well I guess. I was having the weirdest dream.” “Really now?” asked the unicorn. “What was it about?” “I dreamt that a giant metal monster thing attacked Princess Luna,” explained Spike. “I was walking downstairs to say hi to you and there it was, holding the Princess by the neck. I ran upstairs to hide but then it burst through the floor and tried to eat me. I don’t remember much after that. Pretty wacky huh?” “Uh… well you see Spike.” Spike’s eyes widened. “It wasn’t a dream was it?” Before Spike could panic, Twilight quickly gave him an abbreviated summary of last night’s events. To his credit, Spike didn’t say anything throughout the whole discussion. He just listened attentively. When Twilight was done explaining the situation she stared at her little brother expectantly, trying to gauge his reactions. The dragon bore a neutral expression and just stared at the lavender unicorn calmly. Then, after confirming that she had finished her tale, Spike took a deep breath. “WE GOTTA GET THE HECK OUTTA HERE!!!” “Spi-” Before Twilight was able to calm Spike down, the dragon had already rushed to the other side of the room and started packing a suitcase (Twilight honestly could not tell where he had gotten it) with his essentials: Diamonds, Sapphires, Rubies, and all sorts of other gems of every shape and color. Spike snapped the suitcase shut and made his way towards the balcony. Just as he was about to leap from the second story in order to escape the ‘monster’, Twilight seized the hasty dragon in her telekinetic grip. “Spike! Everything’s fine. The Princess said he was perfectly safe. Jorge won’t hurt you.” said Twilight, more to calm her own nerves than anything else. She was still wary of the Spartan ever since he attacked the Princess, despite her conversation with him in the forest. “I promise nothing will happen.” “Are you sure Twi?” Twilight gave the dragon a warm smile. “Positive.” “Well okay, if you say it’s safe.” “Great,” exclaimed Twilight happily. “Now let’s get downstairs so we can make some breakfast. You up for it, number one assistant?” His previous trepidation forgotten, Spike gave Twilight a toothy grin and quick salute before making his way downstairs with the purple mare in tow. When they made it to the ground floor however, the brief bout of enthusiasm was immediately forgotten and fear took a hold of the young dragon once again. “Woah. You said it was bad, but I didn’t think it was going to be this bad,” he groaned in disbelief. “Geez! You guys really did a number on this place.” Despite the girls’ efforts last night, the floor of the library’s main floor was completely covered in rubble. A white blanket still covered the hole where the front entrance used to be, but without a proper wall, water from outside started pooling on a side of the room. Not to mention the draft. The cold air caused both Twilight and Spike to shiver as they carefully made their way to the library’s kitchen. Spike almost had a heart-attack when he saw the crushed stove and destroyed sink. “Great, just great,” he muttered. “How am I supposed to make breakfast without a stove?” “For now just scrounge up something from the fridge, I think there was some left over hay-fries,” suggested Twilight. “Later I’ll go through the library’s books to try and find some sort of spell to fix this mess.” After scavenging a pair of undamaged plates and some silverware from a broken cabinet, Spike set up the table (which fortunately was not harmed during the events that transpired the night before). He warmed up two small piles of hay-fries with a burst of his flame and was about to dig in, when Twilight stopped him. “Wait a second Spike. It’s impolite to eat without everypony present.” “Oh come on Twilight! We’ve never had to wait for Owlowiscious before. Isn’t he nocturnal or something anyways?” Twilight took a second to face-hoof and good thing too; it had been a long time since last she performed one. “No Spike, I’m talking about Jorge.” Spike’s eyes widened. “You can’t be serious?” Twilight’s expression confirmed that she was being very serious. “After everything that happened to him last night showing him a little kindness is the least we can do,” ‘Besides, we don’t want to make him mad,’ Twilight almost said but decided against it at the last second. No need to make Spike more nervous than he already is. “Fine,” grumbled the young dragon. “But how long do you think it’ll take him to wake up?” As soon as the words left his mouth, a loud menacing groan echoed from deep within the confines of the basement. Twilight and Spike stared at the entrance to the sublevel with wide eyes before glancing at each other nervously. They both gulped. “W-was t-that h-h-im?” stuttered Spike. “I don’t know.” But if it was, I hope he’s in a good mood. Jorge groaned a second time. He was not in a good mood. The Spartan had awoken sore with aching muscles, a result from having rolled over into a bad posture in the middle of the night. This was not helped by the fact that he was forced to sleep in his armor. He was used to resting in his armor, but that did not take away from the fact that it was uncomfortable to sleep in. Jorge stood up and began stretching his arms to alleviate some of the soreness. He was surprised to find that music was playing in his helmet, but then remembered that he had trouble sleeping last night and had listened to some audio files to try and help him relax. He turned off the speakers just as Duke Ellington’s ‘Lotus Blossom’ finished playing, and looked around his surroundings. He was frustrated (although not surprised) to find that everything that had happened to him in the last few days had not all been some bizarre dream; as he was still in the basement of a library belonging to a sentient race of talking ponies (again: he was still having trouble coming to terms with this). Yawning and groaning a third time, Jorge slowly made his way up the stairs. The staircase creaked loudly as he stomped up, and the fourth step actually cracked under his weight. Jorge quickly grabbed onto the handrail to avoid falling over and forced himself to climb the staircase at a much slower pace. Finally, five minutes (and three broken stairs) later, the soldier made it to the second floor and walked through the hole where the basement’s entrance used to be. He looked around the messy foyer and heard voices coming from the kitchen. Slowly, almost apprehensively, Jorge made his way to the dining room. The human saw Twilight sitting at the kitchen table with what appeared to be a small pile of really thin French-fries in front of her. Next to her, he was able to see the back of a small purple lizard’s head. After a second glance, Jorge realized that it was the reptile that he had seen outside the barn the other day. A pet perhaps? Why did it also have to be purple? he thought sourly. When Twilight saw the Spartan her eyes widened in surprise. “G-good morning Jorge. Did you sleep well?” “Well enough,” grunted the human. Upon hearing Jorge’s voice the small lizard snapped his head around to face him. Its eyes widened and it just stared at the human without saying a word. Twilight glanced nervously at the lizard, almost as if she was assessing its reaction. “Cooooooooool,” it crooned after a few minutes. Twilight stared at the reptile in disbelief while Jorge took a step back in surprise. “It talks!?” exclaimed Jorge. “Hey, who ya calling it?” huffed the purple creature indignantly. “Of course I talk, why wouldn’t I? Snapping herself out of her stupor, Twilight hastily tried to introduce both of the bipeds. “Spike this is Jorge. He’s a human and he’s going to be staying with us for a few days.” So please, for the love of Celestia behave yourself. “Jorge this is my little brother Spike.” Jorge’s eyebrows rose but this went unseen under his helmet. “I’m sorry, did you say brother?” Twilight nodded happily and gave Spike a tight hug. “Yup. He’s not my biological brother but he’s been with me ever since I hatched him as a filly.” “Ugh, Twilight not in front of him please,” complained Spike as he squirmed in the unicorn’s grip. “Did you sleep in your armor?” asked Twilight, ignoring the young dragon’s pleas. Jorge shrugged. “I like my armor.” The Spartan turned his attention the small reptile in front of him. “So what are you anyways?” “Um… I’m a dragon, duh.” “Spike! Be nice. He’s probably never seen a dragon before,” scolded Twilight. “Right?” “A dragon,” deadpanned Jorge, not answering Twilight’s question. “Sure, why not? I’m in a world with unicorns, pegasai, and dragons. Hát ez fantasztikus.” “I take it you don’t have dragons where you come from?” asked Twilight. “Only in myth.” “Myth?” asked Spike in confusion. "Wadda you mean?” “That you don’t really exist,” explain Jorge. “We just made you creatures up and created stories about you.” He turned to face Twilight. “Same with unicorns and pegasi.” “Fascinating…” whispered Twilight, her nervousness momentarily forgotten. She was about to ask Jorge to elaborate on some of these stories but was interrupted by a large rumble emanating from her stomach. She blushed and glanced sheepishly at the human, who said nothing. “Guess we should eat huh?” laughed Spike. Jorge moved towards the table and motioned himself to sit down on one of the chairs. However, the flimsy wooden seat was unable to bear the massive Spartan’s weight and was crushed under the human almost immediately. Jorge hit the ground with a loud *thud*. Should have seen that coming, he thought in irritation. Spike shoved his claw into his mouth in a weak attempt to stifle his laughter while Twilight looked at Jorge with worry. “Spike, stop laughing! Are you okay Jor-?” “I’m fine,” growled the soldier menacingly, annoyed more than anything else. Deciding to just sit on the floor (he was already more than tall enough to eat on the table from there anyways); Jorge just stared at his empty plate for a few minutes deep in thought. He then took a few minutes to look around the kitchen he was in. Like the rest of the library, the floor was covered in splintered wood. A small mound of metal which used to be the stove lay in a corner of the room surrounded by shards of porcelain. The shards were the remains of a sink, which had also been destroyed the previous night. Tubes stuck out of the wall haphazardly where the sink used to be. While they were no longer spewing water, they were bent and twisted irreparably. Jézusom, micsoda zűrzavar. Jorge looked at Twilight, who was dejectedly levitating the broken wood from his chair and piling it up in a small corner of the room. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. Twilight snapped her head towards Jorge and eyed the human nervously. “Pardon me.” “I’m sorry,” he repeated louder. “Oh,” exclaimed Twilight in surprise. “It’s fine. I can just get another chair.” “I’m not talking about the chair, I’m talking about this.” Jorge waved his hand around the room. “This is your home, and I’m at least partially responsible for its destruction.” Twilight continued to stare at the Spartan, not able to formulate a response. Finally, the purple unicorn simply gave him a small smile. It was the first genuine smile she had given him since their conversation in the forest and it lacked all the trepidation and anxiety that she had radiated up to that point. “It’s fine. I guess it was our fault too. We did kind of freak out on you after all.” The corners of Jorge’s mouth twitched slightly, almost forming a grin. “Yeah yeah, can we eat now?” asked Spike impatiently. Twilight glared at Spike briefly before rolling her eyes and nodding. The dragon immediately began stuffing his face with as much hay as was physically possibly while Twilight floated a plate of food over to Jorge. Realizing that the yellow sticks in front of him weren’t French-fries, the Spartan just looked at the plate in confusion before a look of comprehension appeared on his face. “What’s wrong?” asked Twilight. “I know it’s a little early for hay-fries but it’s all we ha-” “It’s not that,” cut in Jorge. “Humans can’t digest ha-” He has interrupted by someone knocking the front… blanket? Twilight looked past Jorge towards the foyer. I wonder who that could be. “Excuse me.” As usual, the human said nothing as Twilight stood up and made her way towards the entrance of the library. Pushing the white sheet aside, her vision suddenly became filled with nothing but the color pink. “Gah!!!” she yelled as she reared back. “Pinkie what are you doing here!?” The pink pony was standing outside the library with a saddlebag and a smile that seemed to cover most of her face. Despite the rain, she didn’t appear to be wet. The energetic mare was bouncing up and down in excitement and Twilight’s exasperated sigh did nothing to dampen her cheerfulness. “Hi Twilight!” Pinkie rushed towards the purple pony and gave her a bone crushing hug. “How are you doing? Did you have fun during your little slumber party with Jorge? What did you guys do? Did you play truth or dare? How about pin the tail on the pony? Or should it be human cuz of Jorge? Hey Twilight do humans have tails? Ooh did you guy play spin the bottle? How many times did you guys make-oumphfmmmpfhhfpmmf…” Despite having just had a purple hoof shoved in her mouth, Pinkie Pie continued to ramble. She was completely unfazed by the tired glower that Twilight was giving her. After a few minutes (some of the longest few minutes of Twilight’s life) Pinkie finally stopped talking. “Done?” asked Twilight flatly. “Yup!” “Pinkie, it’s seven in the morning, why are you here?” “Huh, did you know that for some reasons ponies love telling me what time it is in the morning,” Pinkie stated ponderously. “They’re always like, ‘Pinkie it’s six in the morning!’ I mean, I know that time it is but you guys always seem to think I don’t.” Twilight sighed miserably. She was not in the mood to deal with Pinkie’s shenanigans that morning. “What do you want Pinkie? Also, why aren’t you wet?” Beaming, Pinkie Pie pulled out an umbrella from here hair. “I keep umbrellas all over town in case-” “Let me guess,” interrupted Twilight. “In case of an umbrella emergency?” “Don’t be silly,” giggled the party pony as she patted Twilight’s head. “In case it rains. I mean, who’s ever heard of an umbrella emergency?” Twilight grounded her teeth in frustration. It turned out she was really not in the mood to deal with Pinkie’s shenanigans. “Why. Are. You. Here!?” “Oh, I’m here to bring Jorgie a present.” At this, Twilight stared at her pink friend curiously. “Really? What did you bring him?” “It’s a secret.” Twilight glanced nervously towards the kitchen. A secret present… from Pinkie? This will NOT end well. Before the purple unicorn could tell Pinkie as much however, the energetic mare had already made her way into the kitchen. “Hi there Jorgie! Whatcha doing?” Twilight rushed into the kitchen and tried to tackle Pinkie before she did anything to upset Jorge. Unfortunately, the pink pony (who was still hopping up and down in excitement) jumped up at the last minute causing Twilight to not only hit miss, but to also hit the adjacent wall with her head. Jorge looked towards the now dizzy Twilight in confusion. Then he glanced at Spike, who was unfazed and eating his meal as if everything was perfectly fine. Well… that was certainly interesting, thought the Spartan Turning his attention back to the bouncing pony in front of him, Jorge noticed that Pinkie had the same unnervingly large smile that she wore the night before. “I’m just having breakfast,” he said coolly. “Oh. Well then in that case I guess your surprise can wait until you’re done.” Jorge tilted his head quizzically. Surprise? Twilight sighed in relief. Thank Celestia. Shaking her head, the unicorn stood up and dragged Pinkie Pie back into the foyer. “Pinkie I don’t think it’s a good idea to give Jorge a surprise until he gets used to living here.” “Why not Twilight?” asked Pinkie, truly puzzled at the lavender mare’s nervous behavior. “We don’t know anything about him,” explained Twilight. “For all we know, what you give him could be offensive in his culture.” “Silly Twilight, what could be offensive about cupcakes?” Twilight was about to reply when she paused and looked at her friend in confusion. “Wait, that’s the big surprise? Cupcakes?” “Yuppers! Why, what did you think I got him? Twilight why are you face-hoofing?” I should have known, thought Twilight. “Well, I suppose that’s okay. Do you want to stay for breakfast?” “Sure!” exclaimed Pinkie with excitement (in all honesty, it would be easier to simply assume that ninety-nine point nine percent of what she did was in excitement). Both mares promptly returned to the kitchen and sat down at the table. Spike was helping himself to a third plate of food while Pinkie immediately inhaled four in less than thirty seconds. Twilight for her part was eating at a much more controlled pace, taking the time to savor each bite, something she immediately regretted as the fries were a few days old. And all the while Jorge, who had yet to remove his helmet, just sat on the floor, staring at his food and contemplating the events in his life that led him to the point where he was being fed hay by a group of alien ponies. Truly, God must be a cruel prankster. “What’s wrong Jorge, don’t you like hay-fries?” asked Twilight in concern. “Well, considering that humans can’t eat hay then I suppose I don’t.” “Twilight you fed him hay?” inquired Pinkie. “Geez that’s such a cliché.” Cliché… what? thought Jorge in confusion. “What do you eat then?” questioned Twilight. “All sorts of things: Grains, fruits, vegetables, dairy products such as milk and butter, meat.” “I’m sorry; I didn’t catch that last one.” “Meat,” repeated Jorge casually. “The flesh of animals.” Upon hearing this Twilight paled while Spike turned five different shades of green. Jorge would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy their reactions. He was a little surprised by Spike’s response though. He had assumed that dragons ate meat, but now it was clear that was not the case. Jorge was also bewildered by Pinkie’s reaction. The pink mare just rolled her eyes, as if she had heard all of this a hundred times before. “I-I-I don’t h-have any m-m-m-m… of that to give you,” said Twilight feeling a little nauseous. The idea of a sentient creature eating meat was still quite disgusting to her. It was actually one of the things that ponies considered as something that separated them from regular animals. She recognized that griffons and dragons were also omnivores but there weren’t that many of them in Equestria and they generally had the good taste to restrict themselves to a vegetarian diet when surrounded by ponies. Twilight assumed that the only reason that Spike was having the same reaction as her was that, being raised by ponies, he had lived his whole life as a vegetarian (save for the occasional gem). “That’s so gross,” muttered the dragon as he tried to keep his breakfast down. “You said you ate other things right?” asked Twilight just to make sure. “Fruits and vegetables?” Jorge nodded. “Well, maybe I have a few apples lying around…” Twilight made her way back towards the fridge and began rummaging through its contents. “Oooh Twilight, Twilight!” called out Pinkie… in excitement obviously. “I have an idea. What if I just gave him my surprise now and he could have it for breakfast!” Twilight paused from her scavenging and hummed pensively. “I guess I don’t see why not,” she said somewhat reluctantly. Pinkie immediately leaped towards the Spartan and onto the dining table, knocking away glasses and plates, and spilling their contents all over the kitchen floor. Jorge backed up slightly, uneasy by the pink earth-pony’s close proximity to him. In one swift motion Pinkie pulled out a large blue box from her saddle bag and presented it to Jorge. The human eyed the box suspiciously before looking at the pony offering it to him. Pinkie was smiling her huge smile as her eyes glittered with anticipation. Jorge cautiously reached out and grasped the box. The moment his hands clamped over the cardboard Pinkie began shivering in anticipation. Jorge brought the box to his face and prepared himself to open it. His muscles were tense as he slowly lifted the cover. The moment he got a glimpse of what was inside his shoulders sagged and he let out an exasperated sigh. Inside the box, were over a dozen cupcakes topped with pink frosting, each one with a large strawberry poking out of the top. “Cupcakes, really? You shouldn’t have.” “You’re welcome!” shouted Pinkie happily as she threw confetti and streamers into the air. “No, I mean you really shouldn’t have,” replied the Spartan curtly. At this, Pinkie’s smile vanished instantly and was replaced by a concerned frown. “What’s wrong?” Suddenly Pinkie Pie gasped. “You’re allergic to strawberries!” “It’s not that,” answered Jorge. “I just don’t eat sugar.” Twilight stared at Jorge in fascination. Much to the human’s annoyance she quickly floated over a notepad and a pen, and began taking notes. “Interesting. Are human’s not able to digest sucrose?” she asked. “No, humans do eat sugar. It’s more of a personal thing.” Growing up in the military base on Reach, sugar had been a commodity, both due to rationing as a cause of the war and because of dietary restrictions. This became even truer on the front, where the military couldn’t afford to have real sugar in their standard rations. Coupled with the fact that Jorge never really had much of a sweet tooth to begin with, and he just stopped eating the sweet substance altogether. It had been years since last he ate the rare and expensive treat but he didn’t really mind that much. Pinkie, however, did mind. A lot. Her entire life was based around sugar (well, that and throwing parties of course). She worked and lived in a bakery. Half her parties featured cavalcades of sweet delights that she personally baked herself. She gave all her friends free cupcakes on a regular basis. Heck, it was practically all she lived on. It was a wonder her teeth were as nice as they were. If any other creature were to eat as much sugar as she did they would rot their teeth away in a matter of days. Most important of all though, apart from throwing a party she always gave a baker’s dozen of cupcakes to every new pony who came to town (Jorge may not be a pony but it was close enough). But it was worse than that. Pinkie had never encountered somepony… someone who didn’t enjoy anything sweet. To have someone to tell her they didn’t eat sugar…it went against everything she believed in. IT DIDN”T MAKE SENSE!!! Pinkie’s huge smile returned just as quickly as it had gone. Though, it wasn’t the same bubbly, carefree grin she had displayed moments ago. This was a smile that was entirely, one hundred percent forced. Twilight couldn’t remember the last time her pink friend had such a strained smile. “Please, I insist,” said Pinkie through clenched teeth as she waved a cupcake in front of Jorge’s face. “Everypony has to try one of my super-duper amazingly stupendously delicious cupcakes!” “No thank you,” answered Jorge gruffly. “Eat. The. Cupcake,” commanded Pinkie. All the sweetness from her voice was long gone. Jorge leaned in close to the pink pony so that his helmet was centimeters away from her face. “No.” Both stayed locked on each other for what felt like hours, neither moving an inch. All the while Jorge scowled at the insistent pony in front of him. The gesture went unseen as all she could see was her equally intense glare reflected of the glass of his helmet. Finally, after a few minutes of silent staring (and Twilight and Spike shifting their eyes between both the human and the pink mare), Pinkie calmly looked down at the cupcake in her hoof and then back up to Jorge. Without saying a word, she rushed at the Spartan with her cupcake in an attempt to force feed him. The movement was so sudden that Jorge was unable to jerk away in time to avoid getting a face full of cake and icing. Unfortunately, in her haste, Pinkie forgot about the helmet separating Jorge’s mouth from her. So instead of being able to revel in the victory of having made another pony happy (she takes others’ happiness very seriously) she only managed to make the human very upset. “ARGHH!!! Te kis rózsaszín kurva! ” shouted Jorge as he stumbled back into the wall behind him. “I’m never going to eat one of your fucking cupcakes, so leave me alone!” “B-b-but…” blubbered Pinkie as tears welled in her eyes. “but e-e-every p-p-pony-” “I’m not a god-dammed pony!” snapped Jorge as he furiously wiped away the frosting from his visor. Once he had cleared his vision enough to see properly he turned his attention back to his attacker, ready to lash at her verbally. But when he got a good look at her he stopped himself. He was surprised to see that tears were forming in the corner of the pony’s eyes while her lower lip trembled violently. Oh for Christ’s sakes, he thought in exasperation. Please don’t cry. Much to his surprise however, as soon as he thought this Pinkie’s tears instantly disappeared and her lip stopped trembling. Jorge thought that she had gotten over the little fiasco when, suddenly, her right eye started twitching and she began mumbling to herself. “C-cupcakes… you…e-eat, everypony… nopony not eat… love sugar… c-cupcakes, you h-have…to,” muttered Pinkie to herself while her eye continued to twitch. Jorge turned his attention to Twilight, who was staring at her friend with concern. “Is she alright?” he asked the lavender mare. “I think you just broke her,” said Spike nervously. Jorge looked back towards Pinkie and saw that both her eyes had crossed away from each other while she was smiling a psychotic smirk. All the while she continued muttering to herself as her eyes twitched. “Everypony needs…eat… meat.” Pinkie Pie suddenly perked up and turned to face Jorge. “Jorgie you said you eat meat right?” “Yes…” answered Jorge cautiously. “Why?” Pinkie didn’t answer the human. She just started rambling to herself again. “M-meat cupcakes instead of sugar? But where would I get meat. One of Fluttershy’s animals… Angel cupcakes,” giggled the mare maniacally. “Jorge,” whispered Twilight anxiously. “Eat one of the cupcakes.” “No,” refused the soldier. But when he turned back to look at Pinkie he saw that she was looking at the kitchen knives with a rather discomforting grin plastered on her face. He did not like that grin in the slightest. “Fine,” sighed Jorge. “I’ll eat one of your bloody cupcakes.” Pinkie’s creepy smirk was immediately replaced with her previous warm smile. “Yay!” she cheered as she grabbed a second cupcake and offered it up to Jorge. Hehheh, works every time, she thought to herself. Jorge eyed the cupcake apprehensively. He reluctantly placed his hands on his head, slipped off his helmet and put it on the table. The human griped the moist cupcake in his hand and took a bite. It took all of his will-power to avoid gagging from the intense sweetness. It was as if he was eating a solid block of sugar. Pinkie’s confectionaries were notorious for having near lethal amounts of sugar. The town had long since gotten used to overly saturated treats, but for someone from out of town the experience could be somewhat unpleasant; especially when that someone rarely ate sugar to begin with. Finally, Jorge managed to swallow the bite. “Thank you,” he muttered unenthusiastically. “Aren’t you gonna finish it?” asked Pinkie. “Oh, I’d rather save it for later. Now can I please have one of those apples?” The group sat down and finished eating. Spike and the girls all ate their hay-fries and helped themselves to some cupcakes while Jorge was forced to contend with half a dozen apples. While at first the meal seemed meager, the human soon came to the conclusion that they were the best damn apples he’d ever had the pleasure of eating. They had a perfect combination of sweet and sourness that proved to be quite pleasant, and Jorge savored every bite as the fruits’ juices ran down his chin. Best of all, the tangy flavor was just what he needed to get the lingering taste of cupcake out of his mouth. Once they were done with their meal, Jorge put his helmet back on and the group returned to the library’s foyer/living room to wait for the Princesses. Twilight excused herself and began searching for a book that might contain a spell to repair the library, while Spike and Pinkie Pie fawned over Jorge’s armor. The Spartan rapidly grew weary of their presence and eventually retreated into a corner of the room to inspect his equipment. Once he had determined that everything was in good condition, he pulled out his combat knife and began sharpening it to pass the time. If I do this too often I’ll have to paint a skull on my helmet. Jorge grinned at the thought. As much as he sometimes hated the reckless soldier, Jorge had to admit that Emile could be a dependable ally in a fight. I never thought I’d say this, but I miss the quiet bastard. Jorge’s thoughts eventually wandered back to Reach and how they were faring. Specifically, how Nobel Team was managing. Had they driven the Covenant off the Planet? Did they win? Of course they did. Reach is the most heavily fortified planet in UNSC space besides Earth, he reasoned. Hell, we’ve got at least twenty MAC guns orbiting the planet. Not to mention all the Spartans that are stationed there… Jorge remained deep in these thoughts for most of the morning, and all the while he continued to absentmindedly sharpen his knife. At around one in the afternoon he was jerked out his thoughts by the rings of an old grandfather clock in the corner of the room. Looking down at his knife, the Spartan came to the conclusion that it was more than sharp enough. He sheathed it and began looking for something to pass the time with until the Princesses showed up. Nothing in the room really caught his interest. Pinkie and Spike were both playing some sort of board game and he was not inclined to go join them. First, because he didn’t know the rules, second because he was loathed to participate in such a childish activity, and third because he feared that talking too much to Pinkie Pie would cause his brain to hemorrhage. Jorge turned his attention to Twilight, who was still nose deep in another book. The Spartan couldn’t help but frown slightly whenever he saw her. Purple, he thought with disdain. They had to pair me with the purple one. As Jorge continued to stare at the unicorn an idea popped in his head. “Tell me about humans.” Twilight was so engrossed in her reading material that she jumped slightly when he heard the human’s voice. “I think you would know more about that than me.” “Not real humans, your version of humans.” Twilight stared at Jorge in puzzlement before realizing what he meant. “Oh! You mean our myths about you?” Jorge nodded. “Well, I don’t remember much in all honesty,” she said apologetically. “I only read about you guys when I was much younger, and I haven’t had much time to brush up.” Twilight began tapping her chin ponderously. “I do know that you look similar to ancient depictions of them, only less hairy.” “Less hairy?” “Yes. I don’t know about the rest of your body but the drawings in the books depicted humans as having more hair on their faces.” Twilight gave the Spartan an apologetic shrug. “Like I said I don’t remember much. I’ll have to read up on it to tell you the specifics. Or you could ask a minotaur about it. If I remember correctly, humans were a more important part of their lore than ours.” “Minotaur?” asked Jorge in confusion. “You mean those half man half bull things?” “Uh… well I wouldn’t describe them as that…” Jorge was utterly flummoxed. He was being told with straight face that there were minotaurs on this planet, universe, dimension, or whatever he was in. He was about to tell Twilight how ridiculous she was being when he suddenly realized that he was holding a conversation with a talking purple unicorn who happened to be related to a dragon. Perhaps minotaurs weren’t the craziest things that might exist on this planet. “Wait. You’re talking about them as if their sentient,” he pointed out. Twilight gave Jorge a puzzled look. “Don’t you have minotaurs were you come from?” “Again, only in myth. Are ponies not the only sentient creatures here?” “No! There are other races besides ponies that inhabit the world.” Twilight spent the next twenty minutes telling Jorge about the other civilizations that ponies shared their world with. She told him about the griffon kingdoms to the north and her brief yet unpleasant experience with one that came to town. She told him all about the Zebra clans that inhabited the great savannahs east of Equestria, spending the better part of that explination talking about her friend Zecora. She described the buffalo tribes to the west. Then she briefly told Jorge about changelings, deciding to avoid explaining the incident in Canterlot a few weeks back. All the while, the Spartan sat and listened attentively; never interrupting the purple unicorn, not even to ask questions or to clarify something he didn’t understand. Twilight actually found it refreshing to finally be able to give somebody a lecture without being interrupted every five seconds. When she was done she looked at Jorge expectantly, waiting for a response from the human. “It’s like I landed in a children’s story book about Greek mythology,” Jorge muttered to himself. “I’m sorry?” asked Twilight. “Nothing.” The mare was about to pry further when she was interrupted by a loud growl coming from her abdomen. She blushed at Jorge and glanced to the clock. One-thirty!!! How did the time pass so quickly? I’ve been looking all morning and I still couldn’t find a spell to fix my library. “Looks like it’s time for lunch,” Twilight said to herself. “Spike, do you mind making us something to eat?” “There’s nothing left in the kitchen,” answered the dragon without taking his eyes off the board game in front of him. “What do you mean there’s ‘nothing left?’” “All the food was either finished this morning or got trashed last night.” “Are you telling me that the only thing we had in the fridge were the left over hay-fries and some apples?” asked Twilight in disbelief. “Pretty much. Besides it is Tuesday.” “Oh…right.” Tuesday was grocery day. Every Tuesday Twilight would go to Ponyville’s market to buy everything they would need for the week. The purple unicorn kept a very detailed list of everything that they needed and was very strict about its contents. She also had an outlined plan on how to get through the market the most efficient way possible (surprise, surprise). As a result she usually did most of the shopping herself. It was also mostly fair, seeing as how Spike did most of the cooking. “All right then,” said Twilight as she reluctantly stood up. “I’m going to head to the market to buy us some lunch. Pinkie, Spike, take care of Jorge and make sure he doesn’t leave the library.” “I wasn’t planning to,” said Jorge. Twilight stood up and grabbed her saddlebag. She was about to exit the library, when she stopped and looked back at the group. Wait, did I just tell Spike and Pinkie to take care of Jorge!? Am I insane? Her question was answered by a second growl emanating from her stomach. Well… I’ll only be gone for less than twenty minutes. They’ll be fine and I’ll be back before I know it. Two hours later, Twilight was still in the middle of Ponyville’s main square. In all that time she hadn’t even been able to buy half of the things on her list. To make matters worse, she had completely forgotten about the rain, resulting in both copious amounts of face-hoofing and her getting soaked. She made a mental note to strangle Rainbow Dash and everypony on the weather team next time she saw them. The reason she liked going to the Tuesday market in the first place was that it was relatively empty compared to other days. This made Tuesdays the most efficient days to go shopping (in case you couldn’t tell, this is a pony who loves efficiency). But this was not the case this particular Tuesday. The reason for this was that there was such a buzz about last night’s events that the market was more crowded than usual despite the rain. Most annoying of all, Twilight was being stopped by somepony every thirty seconds to be asked what had happened in the library the night before. Every single time she would tell them the same lie: she was practicing a new spell which backfired. This would usually get the pony in question to go away, but some of the more insistent ones would then ask why both Princesses showed up. Unable to come up with a believable excuse for this, the lavender mare would then politely tell the inquiring pony to buck off (not in those particular words obviously). Worst of all, anypony not asking her about what happened last night was whispering about her when they thought she couldn’t hear them. She seemed to be the main topic of conversation that day, and the unicorn couldn’t help but feel that whatever they were saying wasn't all that flattering. All of this wasn’t helped by the fact that she had yet to eat anything and was positively starving. Twilight sighed, as she waited in line to get some celery. Dozens of eyes were glancing at her constantly and she was getting rather sick of it. When she finally arrived to stall she was disappointed to find that all the celery was sold out. Well, maybe ‘disappointed’ wasn’t the best word. Perhaps ‘murderously furious’ would be a more apt description? Or let’s just say for now that it was a good thing it was raining, else the little unicorn may have burst into flames again. Forget this! Spike will just have to make something with what I already have. With a huff, Twilight turned around and began making her way back to the library. She was almost out of the crowded plaza, when a small newspaper stand caught her eye. Deciding that it was probably a good idea to get that morning’s paper for Spike, Twilight quickly trotted to the shop. What she saw on the front cover of that day’s newspaper caused her jaw to drop. Oh no!!! This is not good. This is really, really not good. The unicorn quickly gave the shop owner a couple of bits and levitated the paper into her bag. She was about to gallop to the library as fast as she could but when she turned around she came face-to-face with a pair of yellow eyes. “Gah!!!” yelled Twilight in surprise as she jumped back into the stall behind her. Once she got her heat-rate under control she managed to get a good look at the eyes’ owner. “Lyra?” Lyra was standing right in front of the lavender unicorn, piercing her with an unflinching gaze. The mint-green mare was smiling an eerie smile that could put Pinkamena Diane Pie to shame, while her pupils were the size of pinpricks. She also appeared to be panting quite heavily, which only served to notch her creepiness up to eleven. “Where is it Sparkle?” asked the green unicorn in a voice that would make Hannibal Lector piss himself. “What are you t-t-talking about L-L-Lyra?” stuttered Twilight nervously. Lyra stepped forward and presses her nose against Twilight’s, all the while without blinking once. “Don’t play games with me Sparkle,” she hissed. “I know you have it. Now where is the human?” Twilight paled. Whether it was from Lyra knowing about Jorge or from the crazed mare’s stare she couldn’t tell. “I-I… w-what h-huma…” Twilight trailed off when Lyra’s right eye twitched slightly. Dear Luna she’s worse than Pinkie Pie!!! Lyra opened her mouth and was about to speak, when, much to Twilight’s relief, she was interrupted by a voice calling her name. “Lyra there you are!” Without turning her face away from Twilight, Lyra’s eyes shifted to the pony who addressed her. The moment she got a good look at the mare next to her Lyra’s unnerving grin was immediately replaced by the warm smile that she was most known for, while her creepy demeanor evaporated entirely. “Bon-Bon! It’s good to see you sweetie,” said Lyra cheerfully. “How are things at the shop? Are you on a break?” “Uh…yeah,” replied the cream colored mare. “Honey, why are you pinning Twilight against the stand? Twilight, is she bothering you?” Lyra looked down at her hooves. They were indeed pushing Twilight’s shoulders against the newspaper stand, effectively restricting her movement. “Of course not Bon-Bon,” giggled Lyra as she turned her attention back to her marefriend. “Twilight and I are just having a friendly conversation.” The green unicorn immediately snapped her head back to Twilight. Her unsettling stare was back as if it had never left, and her eyes resumed boring into Twilight’s soul. “Isn’t that right, Sparkle?” Twilight gave Bon-Bon a pleading look that said ‘Oh for the love of all that’s good in this world please help me!!!’ Bon-Bon stared at her marefriend quizzically until a look of realization spread across her features. She gave a loud, exasperated sigh. “I know what this is about. Lyra are you interrogating Twilight about that supposed ‘human’ we saw?” “…maybe.” “That’s it, you are coming home with me right now,” ordered the earth pony firmly. “I am so sorry about this Twilight. She’s been obsessed with whatever that was since yesterday” “It’s okay,” squeaked Twilight nervously. Bob-Bon grabbed Lyra’s tail with her teeth and began dragging her away from the terrified unicorn. Lyra did her best to resist, but unicorns rarely ever managed to overpower an earth pony in terms of brute strength and this was no exception. The green mare submitted herself to being dragged away by the love of her live without struggling. Unfortunately for Twilight, she did not go quietly. “You can’t hide it forever Sparkle,” she laughed hysterically. “I know you have the human and I will find it.” All eyes in the market trained themselves on the screaming unicorn as she was being towed away. Bon-Bon blushed in embarrassment at the unwanted attention and picked up the pace. Twilight didn’t move until the crazy unicorn’s cackling faded away entirely. When she finally managed to regain control of her breathing the lavender mare realized that her legs were shaking. She took a few deep breaths to regain her composure and once she did, she immediately teleported to the library. Unfortunately for her, she was so shaken by the recent interrogation that she was unable to perform the spell correctly and was forced to gallop the last few blocks. When she arrived to her tree home, Twilight shook herself in order to get dry and entered the library. She was both surprised and relieved to see that Princess Luna was in the room. The alicorn appeared to talking to Jorge, who had his helmet off and was listening attentively to whatever she was saying with the same stoic, yet somehow grim, expression he normally wore. Pinkie and Spike were still playing their board-game. Both their brows were furrowed in concentration and the dragon seemed to be sweating nervously. Twilight cleared her throat to get everyone’s attention. “Twilight Sparkle there you are!” Luna said merrily. “We were waiting for you.” “Sorry about that Prin- I mean, Luna. I was just getting some lunch.” “Yeah speaking of that, what took you so long?” asked Spike grumpily. “I’m starving!” “It’s a long story,” sighed the lavender unicorn. She pulled out the newspaper and gave Spike her saddle bag. The little dragon grabbed the bag and rushed in to the kitchen to prepare lunch. “We’ll finish after lunch, ‘kay Pinkie?” “Okie dokie lokie,” replied the party pony cheerfully. Twilight turned her attention back to the Spartan and the Princess. “So what did I miss?” “I was just telling Jorge the plan for the next couple of days,” explained the Princess. “My sister and I organized a schedule for how to reveal Jorge to the public over the course of the week. It is a very delicate matter so we’re going to have to do it gradually and carefully, especially because of some of the legends surrounding humans. I was just telling Jorge about them actually.” “They’re not what I was expecting,” muttered the Spartan darkly. Judging from the resentment in his voice, Twilight assumed that they weren’t exactly what one would call complimentary. “You’ll have to tell me about it later because right now we have a big problem.” As she said this, Twilight showed them the newspaper she had bought in the market. Space Oddity Attacks Ponyville!!! At roughly ten thirty pm on Sunday night, Ponyville became the stage for what many are calling the ‘Space Oddity.’ During a birthday party organized for the town’s beloved party expert, Pinkamina Diane Pie (also known as Pinkie Pie), held at Sweet Apple Acres, a bizarre phenomenon occurred. As most of the town was attending the event, the reports of the strange spectacle remain consistent. A bright flash of light in the sky resulted in an orb of energy appearing various feet from the ground. Ponyville’s librarian and magic expert Twilight Sparkle attempted to interact with the strange orb but was unable to do so. Strangest of all however is the fact that, before disappearing, the sphere dropped what at first appeared to be a machine of some kind. This quickly proved false as the next morning the ‘machine’ destroyed the library and eye witness reports (full interviews on pg.3) suggest that the machine was actually some sort of creature. Many say that it bore an uncanny resemblance to a human (a creature of mythology prominently featured in minotaur lore but also appearing in dozens of pony legends). Whether or not the creature bears some resemblance to the mythological creature is still yet to be confirmed, as the beast was promptly transported to an undisclosed location by Miss Sparkle and has not been seen since. The mystery becomes all the more suspicious as later in the evening of that same day, residents of the town reported loud crashing noises coming from the library. A detachment of Royal Guards came out of the building to keep ponies from entering and both Princesses made an appearance to assure the public that everything was under control; which only serves to raise speculation as to what occurred and whether or not there is a greater conspiracy involved. So what is happening? Was the ‘Space Oddity’ a product of some strange weather patterns? Is the creature really a human? Why do the Princesses want to keep this all secret? Is Equestria being invaded by aliens? To that last question this reporter says: most definitely. I for one welcome our new alien overlords. “Glad to see your citizens are taking the news rationally,” snorted Jorge. Luna glared at the Spartan. She didn’t like the human bad-mouthing her ponies. Yet at the same time she couldn’t help but agree with him. The rest of the article continued ranting about the possibility of an invasion and it was apparent that the town (or at least this reporter) was being rather hysterical about the whole affair. “This is a problem,” sighed Luna. “We will have to move the reveal to an earlier date.” “How much sooner?” asked Jorge. “My sister and I will make the official statement tomorrow after I inform her of this development.” “That’s…quite soon,” the human muttered uncertainly. “We have no choice. The longer we let this fear fester and grow the more difficult it will be for the town to accept you, especially with all those legends about your people. We will hold a press conference in the town and you may say a few words or answer questions if you wish.” “Fine,” conceded the Spartan. “And no, I don’t wish to make a speech. Now, you were saying something about getting me home?” “Yes. I have requested that a team from Canterlot come here to examine the area where you landed. They should arrive in a few days, and when they do they will begin looking for any magical residue in the area to determine what spell may have dropped you here.” Luna shrugged. “It’s not much, but it’s a start at least.” “Excuse me, I think I misheard. Did you say ‘magical residue?’” “Yes, why?” Jorge looked at the Luna as if she had gone insane. Talking ponies and minotaurs were one thing, but magic? That was utterly absurd. There was no such thing as magic and yet the Princess was talking about it as if there was. Worst of all she seemed dead serious about it. “What’s the problem?” asked Luna noticing the look Jorge was giving her. “There’s no such thing as magic,” he stated matter-of-factly. “What!?” yelled Twilight. “How can you say that?” “Easy, I just did.” “But, saying there’s no such thing as magic is like saying that there’s no such thing as… gravity or something.” “No, there’s a difference,” explained Jorge. “What?” “The difference being that gravity is real and magic is not.” Twilight grounded her teeth in frustration. Magic was her entire life. It was her cutie-mark, her special talent. It was something that defined her. No, it went beyond that. It was a part of her. To have someone standing in front of her telling her that it wasn’t real was like being told that what made her special wasn’t real. She couldn’t help but feel a little insulted. At least she now had a better understanding as to why Pinkie Pie flipped out this morning. Twilight levitated a book up to the Spartan’s face. “What do you call this then, huh?” “A book,” he responded cheekily. Twilight wanted to tear her mane out. Actually, now that she thought about it, what she really wanted to do was throw the book at Jorge’s head. “No, it’s magic!” “No it’s telekinesis.” “Well how do you think that works!?!” “I don’t know, magnets maybe? Look, I honestly don’t know how you’re doing that,” Jorge sighed while he rubbed his eyes. “From what I’ve seen it’s apparent that you ponies are pretty naïve, and that’s fine. But you cannot tell me you are childish enough to believe that this is magic.” Luna bristled at the insult and glared at Jorge. She was about to tell the human off but Twilight interrupted her. “Oh yeah?” Twilight sent a wave of energy to the book. In a bright flash the piece of literature was transformed into a book shaped block of cheese. Why it turned into cheese the lavender unicorn had no idea, but she could care less at the moment. All that mattered to her was Jorge’s jaw, which had hit the ground after witnessing the transformation. “How’s that for magnets?” she asked, not even trying to hide the smugness in her voice. Jorge didn’t answer. He just stared dumbly at the levitating dairy product in front of him. His brain was desperately trying to find some sort of rational explination for what just occurred but could find none. “How… how did you…” “Gravity,” answered Twilight with a roll of her eyes. Jorge poked the piece of cheese to confirm it was real. Varázslat, kibaszott varázslat. It really was magic! What else would he be able to call it? Twilight had just turned a book, paper and ink, into a solid block of edible cheese. Just to prove her point the unicorn broke off a piece of the food, popped it in her mouth, and started chewing vigorously. It was somewhat stale and had a bit of a dull flavor, but it was alright. Jorge said nothing throughout the whole show; he just continued gazing at the floating food in fascination. Finally, Jorge snapped himself out of his mesmerized state and forced himself to accept his situation. He came to the conclusion that if he overthought everything strange or alien about this world he risked going insane. “New world, new rules,” he whispered to himself. “…a world with magic.” “I take it that you don’t have magic where you come from?” asked Luna. “No. It’s like everything else here, just fantasy.” I’m starting to detect a pattern, thought Twilight. She shuddered slightly at the thought of living in a world with no magic. The concept was so… outlandish to her. She couldn’t even fathom what it would be like. “But wait, if you don’t have magic then how did you get here?” “Technology.” “But how-” Jorge lifted his hand to interrupt Twilight. “Just trust me. It’ll take too long to explain and I don’t fully understand it myself.” He turned his attention to the Princess. “All you need to know is that it wasn’t magic, so whatever plan you had to send me back would probably not work.” “Yes,” conceded Luna. “I can see that. I will have to inform my sister about this. This also means that, for now at least, we have no idea how to get you home.” Upon hearing these words Jorge’s shoulders slumped involuntarily. His expression didn’t change but his eyes did. There was now a flicker of worry in them, almost fear even. Luna noticed the Spartan’s reaction and immediately motioned to rectify it. “This does not mean we will not stop looking for a way. If you managed to arrive here then there has to be a way to send you back.” Jorge didn’t say anything but continued to look at the floor dejectedly. After a few seconds he straightened himself and gave the Princess a firm and confident nod. “Now that that’s settled, Twilight I have some great news!” exclaimed the Princess. “My sister and I have contracted a local architect and construction crew to repair your library. All expenses have been paid for.” Twilight looked at the Princess in shock, as if she hadn’t registered what she was told. Then a huge, Pinkie-esk smile spread her face and she beamed at Luna. “Thank you so much Princess! You have no idea how relieved you’ve just made me.” The alicorn giggled happily at Twilight’s reaction, overjoyed that she could help her sister’s student. “No thanks are necessary Miss Sparkle. After all, your home was the ground for an extra-terrestrial meeting and the subsequent battle. This is a matter that concerns all of Equestria and its neighbors, and as such it was only proper that we repay you for the damages. We actually offered a similar deal to Applejack but she came up with a much more… interesting and fair way to repair her barn.” I have a bad feeling about that look, thought Jorge warily. “Would you like to stay over for lunch Princess?” offered Twilight. “Spike should be done by now, and it’s the least I can do for you.” “That would be lovely.” The group entered the kitchen and sat down to eat. Pinkie Pie, who was writing something in a binder marked ‘Super-duper secret,’ joined them shortly. Luna had forgotten just how much damage she had done to the kitchen the night before and started apologizing profusely to Twilight. The purple unicorn waved her off and explained that everything was alright, especially since the Princess had paid to repair it anyways. Lunch was served by Spike shortly after. The young dragon had outdone himself this time. Spike had made caramelized peppers stuffed with cheese and onions, all sprinkled with various herbs and spices to give it an enticing aroma. The group eyed the food ravenously and Pinkie was drooling so much her mouth practically became a waterfall. Everyone jumped in immediately (Pinkie Pike literally diving into the plate) and the food did not disappoint. A collective group of satisfied groans echoed through the dining room as everyone savored their meal. Jorge in particular was enjoying his food. It had been a long time since he had eaten anything other than standard military rations, and the fresh vegetables were a nice change. He may be a bit of a pain in the arse, but the lizard sure can cook. Once everyone had finished eating and were patting their bellies in satisfaction, Luna turned to address the Spartan next to her. “So Jorge, I don’t have anything else planned for today. I honestly thought that our discussion was going to take longer. I am curious about your species and was hoping to… ask you more about where you came from…” More like strap you down to a table and interrogate you, thought Luna anxiously. She was very excited to learn more about Jorge and last night a part of her may have been serious about conducting the autopsy. Fortunately, Celestia convinced her to restrain herself for now, although she was admittedly finding it very difficult. “…but that can wait. So would you like to go on a tour of Ponyville today instead?” Jorge’s eyebrows rose in surprise, and it was a good thing Twilight wasn’t drinking anything else she may have performed a spit-take. “Uh Princess, what about keeping Jorge secret?” asked Twilight. “It will not be a problem, trust me,” answered Luna confidently. “So what do you say Jorge?” Jorge thought about it for a moment. He didn’t really care much about the tour itself, but he was getting rather tired of being cooped up in the library all day. “Sure,” he answered with a shrug. “Excellent,” said Luna happily. “Twilight, you will have to accompany us as I don’t know enough about Ponyville to give a proper tour. Now Jorge, I will be preforming a spell on you in just a second. Please do not be alarmed. I assure you everything will be fine.” “Just don’t turn me into a piece of cheese.” With that, Luna’s horn started to glow. It lasted a few minutes but when she was done Twilight gasped in surprise. “Whoa,” exclaimed Spike. “Neat!” cried out Pinkie. Jorge looked around the room. He didn’t feel different and everything looked the same as far as he could tell. Then he glanced down at his hands. They were gone. So were his legs and his torso, everything was gone. Jorge could feel panic rising in the back of his throat. What did they do to me!? “It’s an invisibility spell,” answered Luna quickly, as if she could read his mind. “Do not worry, everything is fine. It should wear off in an hour or two.” Jorge continued staring at his non-existent hands. It wasn’t like using his armor’s active camouflage ability. That only gave the illusion of invisibility, turning him into a shimmering specter and making him translucent more than anything. What he was now was one-hundred percent genuinely invisible. It was a very odd sensation. It was almost…eerie? No, eerie wasn’t the right word. It was just different. “You will have to stay close to me so we don’t lose you,” explained Luna. “And try to avoid bumping into any ponies, understood?” Jorge gave a nod but remembered that they couldn’t see him. “Yes.” “Alright then, let us go,” declared Luna as she walked out of the library’s entrance. “Spike do you want to come with us?” asked Twilight. The dragon shrugged. “Sure why not.” If it’ll get me out of doing my chores I’m up for anything. “How about you Pinkie?” “No thanks. I’ve got some things to take care of here.” Twilight was surprised. She had assumed that Pinkie would jump at the chance to come with them. Strangest of all, she had something to do in the library. The unicorn was apprehensive to let Pinkie stay here on her own, but she quickly scolded herself for being so. Now that’s not fair. The library was fine when I came back from shopping, and Jorge will be with us so there won’t be any risk of her offending him. Besides, she’s taken care of the Cake’s twins before. She clearly can be responsible when she wants to be. “Alright Pinkie, just be careful with the books.” And with that, Twilight followed the group outside. The group had been wandering around Ponyville for the last couple of hours, making sure to give Jorge a thorough tour of what they believed was to be his new temporary home. The Spartan was surprised by how large the so-called ‘village’ was. Fortunately, during that time the rain had ceased and the sun returned, casting the town in a warm glow which brightened everypony’s moods considerably. While the streets were still unpleasantly muddy, it was no longer cold. The Spartan also noticed that the clouds hadn’t left on their own accord, but had actually been pushed by a group of pegasai with their bare hooves. He was about to ask his tour guide about it but opted not to. He was actually rather unfazed by it since it wasn’t the most bizarre thing he had seen that day. Honestly, it didn’t even crack his top ten. During the tour, the human was forced to stay at Luna’s side the whole time so that they wouldn’t lose him. He also had to remain silent as to not attract any unwanted attention (somewhat redundant seeing as how he was walking with a member of royalty). While on their walk, Twilight had spent the entire time rambling about the historical significance of this or that building, and eventually Jorge learned how to tune her out. It was clear that she was having a great time giving a lecture to somebody who couldn’t interrupt her; and to anypony passing by it would appear as though the librarian was simply giving a tour to the Princess and not a giant inter-dimensional biped clad in armor. As they weaved through the busy streets of the village, Jorge noticed that all of the residents they crossed paths with bowed respectfully to the Princess. Quite a few of them actually seemed afraid of her. He couldn’t help but scoff at this. It was clear that the alicorn was not as benevolent as she appeared, or at least this was what he thought until he got another good look at her. He was surprised to see that Luna was visibly uncomfortable by the ponies’ behavior, which confused him. Jorge was under the impression that kings and dictators practically basked in this kind of groveling, but this did not seem to be the case. He just chalked it up to another one of the many things he didn’t understand about the world and pushed the thought out of his mind. Finally, after the sun had begun to set, the group slowly made their way out of Ponyville to the outskirts that lay southeast of the town. Jorge was told they were going to a place called ‘Sweet Apple Acres,’ an apple orchard and one of the largest farms in the area. He was also told that this farm was owned by none other than Applejack, and that they were going to discuss something with her. For some reason, Jorge didn’t like the sound of that. When the group climbed the final hill that lay between the town and their destination, Sweet Apple Acres came into view. The human could see that calling the property ‘large’ was a gross understatement. Apple trees spread as far as the eye could see. It was an ocean of green, punctuated by dots of red. Jorge’s breath was actually taken away by the size and beauty of the orchard. The leaves were a deep green that accentuated just how healthy the vegetation was, and with the now cloudless sky as a backdrop the sight was really something. Sadly, Jorge only had a second to admire the view before he was ushered forward by Twilight and the Princess. The red barn that had stored him the other day came into view, and before long the group was standing right outside the structure. “Applejack, are you here?” called out Twilight. “Just uh second!” replied a voice coming from the barn. Shortly after, Applejack exited the barn. Her orange coat glistened with sweat and parts of her body were splotched with some sort of dark grease. Most noticeably though were her eyes, which were tired and had bags under them. “Applejack you look terrible!” said Twilight. “Gee thanks.” “No, what I mean is why do you look so tired?” Twilight’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Did you try bucking the entire orchard on your own again?” “Naw, nothin’ like that Twi,” chuckled the cowpony. “I just had tah wake up earlier than normal tah fix some up some of the old equipment in the barn here. But anyways, where in tarnation is Jorge? Ah thought ya’ll were gonna bring him here so I could tell him?” “Tell me what?” Applejack nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the Spartan’s voice. “Chill out Applejack,” laughed Spike. “Jorge’s right here. The Princess just made him invisible.” “Uh… okay.” Applejack was a little disappointed. Half the reason she wanted to tell the human in person was to see the look on his face. Although the more she thought about it the more she realized it was probably for the best. The human was much less intimidating when invisible. “Anyways, ah got great news for you Jorge! Fer the next couple uh weeks yer gonna be workin’ for me on my farm.” The cowpony tried (and failed) to suppress a self-satisfied grin. “Excuse me?” asked Jorge, not really comprehending what Applejack had just said. “It’s true,” answered Luna. “Despite your circumstances, Jorge, you did break the law and have to be punished accordingly. Applejack here came with an appropriate solution. You work on her farm for a week and she won’t press charges. As for the library, well that was mostly our fault so we won’t hold you accountable for that.” “And if I refuse?” “Then I will be forced to arrest you for destruction of property,” said Luna confidently. In truth was she was quite nervous. She knew she wouldn’t be able to arrest Jorge on her own (or even with the aid of her royal guards for that matter) so she was hoping that he would accept their terms. She was fully aware that it would probably take a lot of convincing on their part to get Jorge to concede. She was prepared for a long and arduous discussion in order t-” “Okay.” “Huh?” exclaimed Luna cleverly. “I said ‘okay,’” repeated the Spartan grudgingly. As much as he hated the idea of being forced to work on this farm, it was better than risk getting thrown around some more by the ponies’...magic. Plus, seeing as how these ponies were probably his only hope of going home he wisely decided that it would be best not to piss them off. “Oh. Well, that was easier than I expected. Okay then, I suppose we should head on back the library.” “Hold on uh second Princess,” said Applejack. “Gimme fifteen minutes to shower and I’ll head on back with you.” “Applejack why would you come to the library with us?” questioned Twilight. “You know…cuz of the party at your place?” “What party?” “Pinkie came over here this mornin’ invitin’ me tah some sorta small dinner party she was throwin’ for us at yer library.” “What!?” shouted Twilight indignantly. “She didn’t tell me about this!” “Does that mean the party’s canceled?” Twilight sighed and rubbed her eyes. “No. Knowing Pinkie she probably got everything set up already. Go take your shower and we’ll all go back together.” While Applejack went inside to clean herself of, Luna excused herself. She went off into the trees to raise the moon, leaving Twilight, Spike, and the still invisible Jorge on their own. After fifteen minutes of awkward conversation, Applejack and the Princess both returned and the group headed back to Ponyville. Half-way there Jorge’s invisibility spell wore off but by then it was dark enough that he remained concealed, so the Princess decided not to waste any time conjuring another one. Still, the group picked up the pace after that. Once they had arrived to the library, Twilight brushed aside the make-shift door and was the first to enter. The moment she walked in she could tell something was wrong. For one, the library was dark and she had expected Pinkie to be here. But there was something else… something in the air, similar to when she was wandering the Everfree on her own yesterday. It’s quiet, she thought to herself as the others entered from behind. Too quiet… wait a minute! Twilight was suddenly struck with a horrifying realization. Something that Applejack had said earlier echoed in her head. ‘Pinkie came over here this mornin’ invitin’ me tah some sorta small dinner party she was throwin’ for us at yer library...’ ‘…some sorta small dinner party she was throwin’…’ ‘…small dinner party she was throwin’…’ ‘…dinner party…’ ‘…party.’ OH NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO…!!! She couldn’t believe she didn’t realize it sooner. When Twilight had been told that Pinkie Pie was throwing a small dinner party at her library she assumed it was going to be a modest affair for just their friends. She had even come to like the idea, seeing it as an opportunity for Jorge to get to know them and try to forget lingering resentment from last night. But now that she thought about it she realized her terrible mistake. Pinkie’s parties were never small affairs, at least not by everyone else’s standards. …NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONNO!!! Before the unicorn could react she was blinded by the room’s lights suddenly turning on. “SURPRISE!!!” shouted multiple voices from inside the library. When Twilight’s vision cleared she got a good look at the foyer. There was a large banner hanging from the ceiling that read ‘Welcome to Ponyville (please don’t eat us) Jorge!!!’ Under said banner stood dozens of ponies, all staring at a now visible Jorge with their eyes wide and their mouths agape. Twilight did the only thing she could think of at a time like this… …she face-hoofed. ______________________________________________________________________________ Wow, I'm starting to run out of cliffs to hang this story from. Anyways, have some announcements! First and foremost, as always I would like to thank BassTheBrony and Varocity for pre-reading. And I would like to especially thank my new pre-reader and Hungarian translator koroziwe, who has graciously agreed to help me edit the story. Second, with regards to the armor abilities: Despite my better judgement I have decided to let you (Yes You!) choose which armor ability to give Jorge by voting in the comments. The options are: The voting has officially come to a close. Thanks for reading!