//------------------------------// // Educating Your Kill Parrot // Story: Ofolrodi // by Imploding Colon //------------------------------// Rainbow Dash held her last bleakweed leaf in her little pony hooves and brought it to her little pony mouth so she could nibble on it with her little pony teeth. She did so with a considerable amount of precision and purpose, pivoting the whole of the morsel as she continued to bite into the thing. Seraphimus was forced to stare at her the entire time. Her headcrest raised and lowered, and the griffin ultimately frowned. "What's this...?" she hissed. "In addition to a murderer, you're also a glutton?" "Mrmmmfff... grnnghh-hnng..." Rainbow Dash waved a fetlock, swallowed, then continued nibbling at the leaf. Seraphimus sighed. Her hawkeyes darted straight up. Wildcard gazed back—but was silent. His gaze remained on Rainbow Dash. At last—after a few little chompy-chomps with her molars—Rainbow Dash finished her "work." She swallowed the last few bites down, then placed the leaf down between the two of them. "Ahhh... urp... there we go..." The leaf had been bitten to form a perfect curved line: consistently narrow like a quarter-circle. "I would have drawn a line in the sand... but my hoof edges aren't as good as talons." Rainbow gestured at the bound guest. "I mean... you have talons, but we also don't have sand. Plus, you're kinda sorta in a homicidal rage at the present moment." She chuckled cheekily. "Heh heh heh heh..." "... ... ..." Seraphimus glared. "Aaaaaaaanyways..." Rainbow Dash shifted forward and pointed at the leaf. "Look at this leaf." "No." "So... pretend that this leaf... is the world that we live on." Rainbow's eyes occasionly darted between the partially-eaten meal she was gesturing at and the prisoner before her. "The land I'm from, Equestria, and the land you're from, Rohbredden, are both located on the curved portion of the plane." She pointed at the convex side of the bitten leaf. "This is the side where ponies, griffins, mules, squirrels, and all the rest love to live and play. The Sun and Moon both light this side—well—except for the very-very edge of it. That's the Twilight Lands and the seas where the midnighters loved to hang out." Seraphimus merely stared. "You..." Fluttershy squirmed, floating closer to Applejack. "Do you think any of this is getting through to her?" "I dunno, darlin'." Applejack adjusted her hat, eyes locked on Seraphimus. "Reckon she's got her attention grabbed." "So... you and me?" Rainbow managed a fuzzy smirk. "We've always lived on the bent outward side of the plane. But... there is also this side..." Her blue hoof swam over to the concave side of the bitten leaf. "This... is the Dark Side..." Rainbow's brow furrowed. "It's called that because there is no Sun. There is no Moon. There is only stars. This side of the world is a total mystery to most of the creatures who live on the Light Side... creatures like you and me." "... ... ... ... ..." was all Seraphimus had to give. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand..." Rainbow Dash ran her hoof over the concave side again and again. "...it's a safe bet that whatever lives on the Dark Side of the world isn't very much attuned to Harmony. We're talking about Goddess-knows what kinds of monstrosities are allowed to live in a pitch-black place ruled only by chaos." She gulped, her eyes trailing off slightly. "Nasty... bone-chilling... life-stealing chaos..." Seraphimus raised an eyecrest. Rainbow cleared her throat, stifled her tremors, and looked solidly at Seraphimus again. "Well... turns out that there is one shining light on the Dark Side. One all-important beacon that was placed there longggggggggggg ago. I'm talking a gonzo amount of years ago. Like... friggin' eons atop of eons having a pancake slumber party of near-eternal proportions. There really is no way to picture the gargantuan amount of epochs shoveled into a furnace and churned around with—" "Laying it on thick, Rainbow," Twilight droned. "Like unwashed wool!" Rarity winced. "Errr... you get the picture!" Rainbow circled the leaf with her hoof. "Big... bigggggg banana-shaped plane. Super old! And—just as old—there's a thing situated in the middle of the undercurve... here." She pointed at the middle of the concave portion. "Tucked away in some super ancient place called the 'Midnight Armory.' This amazing magical artifact is called the 'Harmonic Prism'. And while everything else about the Dark Side is evil, ugly, and chaotic—this thing... this artifact... this solid piece of peace-bringing Harmony is the answer to restoring life in all of its glory... or... more specifically... the life of this plane we all make ugly burpies on. Why is that important?" Seraphimus' bored eyes met Rainbow's. Rainbow's brow furrowed. "Because this plane is dying. It once belonged to a bigger and more awesome thing. A collection of curved planes. But—a long time ago and for some reason—this piece of the bigger thing got... broken off. Sundered. And now it's... like... a smaller thing. And it's energy is waning... and so is all the stuff living on it. And... like... the powers of Harmony—the same powers that give us the Sun and Moon and the Harmonic Prism—can only sustain life for so long. Even that has to run out... unless someone... somepony... gets the Harmonic Prism, brings it back to the bent outward part... and gives the entire plane a snazzy, cosmic reboot." Rainbow Dash leaned back. She took a deep breath. "I only found out about this about two years ago... and even then I only knew so much. I've been discovering little bits of truth along the way. Along what way? Well—to make a long story short—I've been flying eastward from my home kingdom every month and week and day and night so that I may one day cross over onto the Dark Side so that I might then fetch this Harmonic Prism from the Midnight Armory and do something to stop the world from going permanently kaputzy." Seraphimus was silent. Rainbow arched an eyebrow. "Nothing. Not even a spittake or—" "That entire story is asinine," Seraphimus grunted. Her beak clapped: "You're asinine." Fluttershy and Pinkie winced. "Mrmmmmmmm..." Rainbow face-hoofed hard. "Wrong... A-Word..."