//------------------------------// // Chapter 24 // Story: Borrowed Time // by Gambit Prawn //------------------------------// It was another beautiful day at Cookie Court. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the clichés were in full-bloom. Outside the massively oversized double-doors, foals from all over Equestria queued up for an audience with the princess. Aside from the safety-glass windows, The room as a whole was padded. And the floor deformed under the ponies’ hooves. There was also, the otherworldy pink mist, which was completely normal and nopony thought twice about. Of course, the highlight of Cookie Court was its princess—me. I sat on my silver beanbag throne at the center of the room. I was positioned directly below the skylight, which meant around midday I had to put up with the worst glare. Honestly, I had a couple of complaints about the room’s layout, but it had turned out fairly well for using foals as the architects. I had established Cookie Court to permit the underrepresented colt and filly population to have a voice. All the adults called it adorable, but Cookie Court addressed the most serious of matters! Wearing her characteristic stoic smile the captain of my guard led in the first petitioner. He was a dark gray pegasus colt with yellow mane. “Thank you, Bulwark,” I said, as the guardsfilly rounded off to my side. My unicorn scribe unfurled a scroll, cleared her throat and made her announcement: “Presenting Thundercloud. Five years-old, from Fluffyvale.” “What can I do for you, my little pony?” I asked, putting on a princessly smile. “Huh?” The colt said. “But I’m five and you’re littler than I am.” I waved my hoof dismissively. “Semantics. Anyway, I hear you have a personal grievance.” “Yes, Your Highness. My moms say I have to go to bed at 7:30, and I’m sick of it!” “Lucky,” I murmured. “That’s later than my bedtime…” “But my friends get to stay up until 9:00” “What!?” I exclaimed, as my tiny wings flared out dramatically and I fluttered upwards. This might have been imposing, but my mane flopped over my eyes in the process. With a hop in her step, Sunny Style pulled out her brush and combed my mane out of my face. It helped to have a scribe who could do other things. Dignity restored, I struck a regal pose. But this time, my crown fell off. Thundercloud giggled as my colt advisor levitated the crown back on. Restraining myself this time, I pronounced my wise ruling. “As princess of Cookie Court, I hereby proclaim that you shall no longer have a bedtime!” Silence hung in the air as my words sunk in. I was so sagacious! “Princess…” my advisor interjected. However, I wasn’t done. “And furthermore, you shall have unlimited snacks!” “But I didn’t ask for…” “All judgments are final!” Style unfurled another scroll and read rapid-fire: “Judgments are final pending review and approval of a senior princess. No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. Offer not valid in Neighbraska. Grown-ups are prohibited.” My advisor tried once more to get my attention. “Princess Alice, I am obligated to remind you that you do not have jurisdiction over parent-foal relations.” I pouted. “That’s a stupid rule.” After a moment, I started to fidget. “Somepony get me a cookie,” I ordered. “Please,” I added. After all, I may be a pony princess, but I didn’t have to be a bossy one. A servant entered carrying a cookie three times my size. My teeth may not have fully developed yet, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me from enjoying my treat. In the course of several minutes, I gradually nibbled off one of the corners like a beaver gradually felling a tree. Satisfied, I rubbed my stomach contentedly. “Next!” I bellowed. “But you haven’t solved my problem yet,” the colt reminded me. Cursing my attention span, I racked my brain for a solution. “How about this, then? You can ask your parents for a later bedtime in exchange for completing some additional responsibilities.” “What does that mean?” the colt asked. “It’s give and take,” I explained. “It’s like you give a cookie to get a cookie.” “I don’t get it,” the petitioner said. “You don’t need to get it. Let your princess handle everything,” I said with a smile. I called for a crayon and parchment and started to write. In the course of what felt like two hours of hard work, I meticulously outlined the subtleties of the arrangement. I suggested a couple of chores Thundercloud could do to for a later bedtime and other ways he could show his moms he was responsible enough to stay up late. When finished I handed it over to Style, who proceeded to transcribe it on the back side while sprinkling in legalese. It also helped that her writing was actually legible. Accepting the piece of paper, the colt was still confused. Sensing this I reassured him: “Trust me, take this to your parents and it’ll at least start a conversation.” “Okay…” the pegasus said. “I’ll take it, but I liked what you said before better.” “Me too.” “Next!” I said, pressing a button. A trapdoor opened up, and gasping, the colt slid into a dark abyss. I giggled. I never tired of seeing ponies’ reactions to my dismissal mechanism. I reasoned the momentary surprise was a fair toll for getting to play in my super-fun ball pit. Bulwark then opened the candy-cane double doors and two dark purple, pink-maned fillies entered. Thinking I was seeing double I blinked a couple of times. Sure enough, my eyes had not deceived me. “Presenting Pink Plum and Plum Pink,” Style announced, confirming my suspicions that these were twins. “They are twenty-eight years-old and hail from far-off Canterlot.” Style was silly sometimes. Canterlot is right here; it’s not far away. But she was so useful otherwise, that I could forgive her ignorance of geography. “What can I do for you, my little ponies?” In perfect sync, the two of them explained: “Our parents say we have to share everything because we’re twins, but we’re sick of sharing. They bought us this super fun bouncy ball for our birthday, and we both want to play with it all the time.” “Can I see it?” I asked. Reluctantly, they rolled it over to me and I stepped down from my vantage point. I bounced it on the floor and it sprung all the way up to the ceiling. As it ricocheted around the room, I giggled blithely as everypony else ducked for cover. My completely scientific curiosity satisfied, I now completely understood why the fillies didn’t want to share such a neat toy. “I’ve got it!” I exclaimed.  “I hereby order two new balls to be provided to you, so you won’t have to share.” Reaching out, I plucked the bouncing ball out of the air. “I guess I’ll take this boring old ball off your hooves, then.” My advisor tapped me on the withers. “Princess you’ve already spent our entire budget for this week.” "What!? Already? How?” “It was the giant cookies that put us over the top I believe.  Just because they’re cheaper by the dozen doesn’t mean you have to buy them in bulk.” I frowned. Squirt could definitely be a buzzkill at times. But then again, I didn’t know where I’d be without him. “Ponyfeathers. I guess we’ll have to do this the boring way again.” I rolled my eyes, and pushed the ball back towards the siblings. After twenty minutes of bickering, all parties ultimately signed the agreement: the ball would be shared with three days apiece, when they would play with it exclusively together on Mondays. I made the brilliant suggestion that they keep a running balance of when one sister shares her time, so that the other will know to reciprocate. Finally, the climax arrived, and I gleefully pressed the button to dismiss the petitioners.   Mouth agape, I Remembered at the last second and grabbed the ball in my magic. It would have defeated the entire point if the ball had been lost among the others in the pit. Handing it to a servant to deliver it to the ball pit’s exit, I let out a cute sigh. “We’re done, right?” I asked. “Three’s usually the magic number.” “Actually, Princess, the twins still only count as one request.” I yawned. “Aren’t I supposed to be getting something like sixteen hours of sleep?” “Rest assured, Princess. We are still on schedule.” With a smile Bulwark trotted to the double-doors once more and opened them. To my surprise I saw a cream-colored earth pony colt my age float into the room. Then, a slightly older filly came into view through the pink mist, holding him by the neck. Even before Style’s announcement, I knew the last petitioner couldn’t be older than ten. Her teal coat shined with such luster that I could have mistaken her for a crystal pony, while her caramel mane was in a bun. Strangely, the infant’s mane was cut unevenly and braided into a ponytail on one side. Style whipped out her scroll once more and cocked her head in confusion. Shrugging, she showed the scroll to Squirt, who also became perplexed. “Hey, Chamberlain!” Squirt called. “Is this some kind of joke?” The brown-coated stallion slipped into the room. “No,” he explained, “that is in fact her name and home city. “Every other letter has a funny squiggly thing over it,” Style complained. “Just do your best,” the lone adult said reassuringly. “Pass,” Style said, shaking her head. “Presenting a seven-year-old filly and a one-year-old colt, At least that’s what the numbers appear to be. Why don’t you state your names for the court, since there’s no way I’m going to be able to say them.” “Oh, that must be my true name,” the filly explained, gently putting the colt down. “We can’t pronounce it yet, so everypony just calls me House Keeper.” This was a strangely restrictive name, even for a pony. I checked the filly’s flank, but it was as blank as my own. “And this is my little brother, Glorious Successor.” I giggled. That sure was a silly name. “What can I help you two with?” I asked, stifling my laughter. “Actually, it’s just me. I had to bring him too because he’s my responsibility. But it’s because of him that I’m here.  I have lots of brothers and sisters, and my mommy says I have to learn to take care of them.” “Well, I’m an only filly, so I can’t speak from experience, but with big families, everypony needs to help out sometimes,” I offered. The young colt started to cry and the filly summoned a bottle out of nowhere to appease him with. As Successor suckled, the filly wore an expression of consternation as she tried to give voice to her thoughts. “I love my little brothers and sisters, but I’m taking care of them all the time! I hardly get any time to play.” “What!? No playtime? This is an outrage,” I squeaked.   Furthering her complaint, she added, “And when I am allowed to play it’s always dolls, dolls, and dolls! I don’t like dolls!” “Everypony should have toys she enjoys,” I professed. “What toys do you like? We can buy you some.” “Princess, the budget…” Squirt prompted. “What toys do you like?” I repeated. The filly suddenly looked very nervous. “I don’t know. Maybe, I would like to try model kits like my brothers have. I don’t know, but I just don’t like dolls. And I want to help my dad find what he’s looking for when I get older!” “Well, what do your parents say?” I asked. House sniffled. “I asked my mommy, and she petitioned daddy for me, but he got mad at us. He told her I must learn my place in life.” Tears came to her eyes. “Please, can you help me?” She said, as her voice trailed off and turned into a screech. I plugged my ears to keep out the awful noise, but meanwhile, The murmur of feedback became more and more acrid. “Please…” “Please…” “Please…” My forehead throbbed and I awoke in a sweat. ‘Good morning.” Luna greeted me as I sprung up to all-fours. Panting, I looked to her for some reassurance. “Should I have intervened?” she asked. “No, you did the right thing. That was just weird,”  I said. “I wasn’t myself.” “It’s entirely normal. In dreams we will often accept the most absurd of premises. You just happened to buy into your role this time.” I scowled. “It feels like I let that blasted stallion beat me again, though. I don’t like it, not one bit.” Luna responded with a quick hug that wasn’t entirely unappreciated. “Did you see all of that?” I asked, hopeful. “I did,” Luna said with a guilty smile. “I must confess it was utterly adorable.” Ignoring the “compliment” I explained, “My main concern is the last filly.” Her predicament was eerily similar to my own, but worse. Despite her wishes, she was being forced into a nurturing role. “Is there any chance this filly is real?” I asked. Luna shook her head. “I doubt it. Mares have always been the privileged gender in Equestria. There are some cultures that have glorified stallions, but those cultures have become less orthodox as of late. It is more likely that your subconscious assembled this scenario out of your own fears.” I thought back to the filly’s tears. Somehow they seemed to transcend the pink-tinted reality of the dreamscape. “Well, you came to the trouble to greet me by my bedside. I take it you’ve deduced something?” Luna shook her head. “Not really. It has merely been a while since you’ve had such a memorable dream where you played the part of an alicorn foal. I merely wanted to check on you.” “Aren’t you concerned with this pattern?” I demanded. “I mean, the brown stallion has already shown me my coronation. It seems like he wants me to conform to this princess thing. This could be quite bad.” “I had a similar suspicion,” Luna noted. “However, I have heavily scrutinized your dreams for any trace of mind magic, and excluding the typical shroud of suspension of disbelief, there has been no trace.” I checked the clock. I had just enough time for breakfast. Slipping the ring on my horn, I combed my mane over my forehead.  Self-conscious about Luna’s watchful gaze, l asked my guest, “I’m sorry. Was there anything else? I kind of just slipped into my routine.” Luna smiled and her horn glowed. “Actually, yes, these came for you.” A small pile of letters floated towards me. “I got mail?” I asked stupidly. “I fanned them out in my hoof. “Three? But who would want to send me a letter?” Luna smiled. “There’s only one way to find out.” I examined the first, cyan envelope and saw that it had no return address, or anything beyond my name for that matter. What stood out was the penmanship—it was impeccable. Curiosity finally overcoming me, I ripped it open and unfolded a single sheet of stationary with a rose bush in the background. It was clearly a pre-printed template with the details filled in by hand. You are invited! Who: River Glade What: Iron Jill’s slumber party When: Next Monday starting after school. Where: 1803 N. Wicker Way  Why: Good food, games and so much more. It’s not to be missed I looked up and Luna was still standing there scrutinizing my expression. “Oh, don’t mind me,” she said, flicking her forehoof. “Though I have to confess curiosity as to what brought on this deluge of mail.” “I got invited to a slumber party,” I said flatly, hoofing over the stationary. “Rather to the point isn’t it?” Luna commented. “Though I suppose it’s in the tradition of minotaur pragmatism. Well, are you going?” “I don’t know yet,” I said, though I doubt I did a good job of hiding my reluctance towards the idea. “I’ll probably want to talk to Iron Jill first.” Luna cracked a grin. “I suppose you wouldn’t much appreciate it were I to intone that social gatherings would be good for you.” “You suppose correctly.” I said simply. “Your sister does that well enough.” The next envelope contained a card with a starry sky printed on the front. Opening it, I was met with small, evenly-spaced print. Dear, River Glade We hope you are doing well. You probably know that Squirt doesn’t want a cuteceanera, so it might come as a surprise that this is precisely what we are inviting you to. After all, it’s a once-in-a-lifteime event, and we don’t want Squirt to look back and regret not having one. We know he doesn’t like large crowds, so we’ve hoof-picked only his closest friends to join us. We’re sure it would mean a lot to him if you came. One more thing: It’s a surprise party, so try not to say anything. We haven’t quite determined the date yet, so let us know if you are coming and we’ll keep you informed. Thank You, Coffee Swirl and Latte Swirl. Gently closing the card, I again presented it to Luna. “This one I’m probably going to,” I said. “Squirt might be my favorite classmate, and if we’re going to celebrate him finding his talent—well that’s more than enough reason to have a party.” Luna nodded wordlessly. “As for the final invitation…” I quickly tore it open and beheld an ornate card design with what appeared to be fake gold leaf. I scanned it quickly and then again to make sure I had read it correctly. I was stunned into silence. “Well?” Luna finally after a patient minute of waiting. I blinked a couple of times and checked the invitation one last time, making sure “Just Kidding” wasn’t inscribed on the back. “Apparently, I’m invited to Annuity’s birthday party.” I said through a nervous laugh. “How about that?” "Now, class, exponents may seem intimidating at first, but all you need to remember is that it’s a little counter telling you how many times to multiply a number by itself,” Fizzle reminded us following our work with small groups. I had been paired with Style and Stardust. Since we were rapidly approaching the endpoint of my original mathematics education, I made sure to pay extra attention. But it didn’t help that all the two of them wanted to do was plot our next move against Annuity. Thankfully, I found exponents an easy topic; it would be roots that would be trouble for me. I probably would have to learn Equestrian decimals in order to cope. Fizzle clasped her hooves together. “Okay, time to go over your answers. Let’s start with… Pish’s group.” The named filly started to stand up, but Annuity put a hoof to her withers and waved Pink Diamond to stand up. “Okay, Pink Diamond, what did your group come up with for the first problem—2^3?” “Two to the third power is nine!” The filly announced confidently. The room went silent. Fizzle betrayed a wisp of disappointment before turning back on her aura of eternal patience. “How’d you get that answer?” she asked. This put a damper on Pink Diamond’s peppiness. “Well, I thought the exponent was the big number—like, you know, something that expounds goes outward. And three times three is nine…” I felt bad for the filly, but I couldn’t understand how she could’ve made that mistake. Fizzle had given us many examples already. “Did I get it backwards?” Diamond asked. Fizzle nodded and trotted towards the board. “It’s the other way around. Two to the third power means two multiplied by itself three times. Two times two is four, and you do it one more time to get four times two makes eight.” “Oh…” Our turn came next, and I announced that 4^3 is sixty-four. Considering I only had to say the number and didn’t have to convert it into its base twenty-three written form, I had no fears of botching my conversion. Six problems later, it came back around to Annuity’s group. “Pish, why don’t you take this one?” Fizzle prompted. Diamond stood up, nervous. “Actually…  I’d like to redeem myself,” Diamond announced. Fizzle nodded. “That’s fine with me. Pish?” “I have no objections,” the filly said. Pink Diamond seemed to recapture some of her enthusiasm as she announced triumphantly, “One to the one power has to be zero!” Before Fizzle could correct her, she continued. “Since exponents are like multiplying with that many numbers, and multiplying with one number is silly. The answer’s zero!” “That’s a good thought,” Fizzle said encouragingly. “You’re trying to reason it out for yourself, which is good. Unfortunately, the mathematical definition of a number to the first power is itself. You can think of the number 1 as always being 1 to the first power, we just don’t write it that way. The same is true with all natural numbers: two is secretly two to the first power; three is secretly three to the first power. If it helps you, you can think that something to the first power means to just the number by itself.” "I see…” Diamond murmured, discouraged. I glanced at Annuity, who was doing her best to hide a smirk. When the bell rang, I promptly pulled my desk away from the others’. Stardust was drumming her hooves on her desk. “Annuity tricked Pink Diamond. I just know it!” I shrugged. “You’re probably right, but you can’t prove it.” “River’s right,” Style said resignedly. “I don’t like it either, but the AAA has to pick its battles. This one we can’t win.” “Yeah, well, that doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Stardust pronounced. “It makes me want to do something.  That’s it! We can recruit new members since we’re going to be trapped inside by rain.” “Rain?” I asked, confused. “It looked perfectly clear this morning.” The fillies laughed. “Good one River!” Stardust exclaimed, raising a hoof, which I bumped. “An oldie but a goodie,” Style added. “Your delivery is what nailed it! You really sounded like you actually didn’t know!” “Know what?” The fillies snorted in amusement. “You know, never mind,” I said. I would ask later, as I had clearly escaped without making a fool of myself. With our desks returned to their original positions, Pestle took out a familiar gold-tinted card and waved it around. “Well. Well. Well. It looks like somepony wants me at her party after all.” “No!” Annuity wailed, jumping onto Pestle’s desk from the top of her own. She snatched at the invitation. “Give me that!” “I see how it is,” Pestle said, tugging back. “When we butt heads, what you’re trying to say is that deep down you really want to be friends. That’s so sweet”   "As if, Pestle Nix!” Annuity grumbled. “My mother sent them out to everypony in the class—even though I told her not to.” There was a clamoring of happy surprise as those whose invitations hadn’t yet reached them learned for the first time that they would be able to attend Annuity’s coveted birthday bash. Pestle and Annuity lunged at each other, neither relinquishing the invitation. As they started to skirmish, their kicks at one another kicked up a violent cloud of dust. This obscured both participants and they wrestled on the desk. “Girls! Girls!” Mrs. Fizzle called out, running up to separate them. As her magic pulled the two of them apart, both were still clinging onto the invitation with their teeth. Even magically, restrained, the two of them continued the tug-of-war. Neither refused to yield, and finally the invitation split down the middle. Pestle spit out her half with a smile on her face. “Fine I didn’t want to come anyway.” Annuity looked simultaneously relieved and disappointed at this outcome. After Ms. Fizzle forced apologies out of them, Annuity pompously hummed and turned her head. “Whatever,” Annuity said. “You coming, Zap?” “Sure!” Zap said, chipper, fluttering. “Can I come too?” Pink Diamond asked. “Of course.” Meanwhile, Stardust joined Style at the desk behind Beakington. “Okay, recruitment time!” Stardust said. “Beakington, Spectacle, River. We’ll handle the fillies, and you guys can talk to the colts.” The griffin shrugged. “Sure.” “Yeah, I guess,” I said, unenthused. “I’ll tell Spectacle.” “I think I know who to start with,” Stardust said, eyeing Pestle. However, at that moment, I heard the unzipping of a large saddlebag. I turned my head towards the source and saw Bubble Bauble in the back corner starting to place various trinkets on her desk. Stardust and Style exchanged a glance and started to gallop towards her. Gradually, most of the fillies in the room started to run over to their cubbies to retrieve their bit purses. Once the scuffle near the cubbies had cleared up, there was a mad race over to Bubble Bauble. “What’s happening?” I asked Beakington "Oh, a couple of times a year Bubble Bauble brings her crafts in for sale. She wants to design jewelry. She’s really good at what she does. All the fillies love her work.” The female members of the AAA came trotting back. Style was wearing what appeared to be a faux pearl necklace, while Stardust wore a single ruby earring. “How do we look, River?” Stardust asked, giggling. “Good,” I said placatingly. “Wait, is that a real ruby!?” “Yep!” the filly said, posing to show off her new earring. Wow. I guess Canterlot is more affluent than I thought. "I can’t wait to show my mom!” Style said.  Wait…  "That’s all well and good,” I said, “but aren’t you providing funds to the enemy, or something like that?”  The unicorn fillies exchanged a glance, and they momentarily frowned.  “Well, I guess that’s one way to think about it, but Bubble’s stuff is too good to pass up!”  Style finally conceded.  “Yeah,” Stardust agreed. “Bubble Bauble is sometimes mean, but she’s just following Annuity.”   Just following orders, huh? “Anyway good luck,” Style wished us, scurrying off. “So, what now?” I asked Beakington. “I don’t know,” the griffin confessed. “I personally think we should actually do something about Annuity before we ask others to join us.” “Yeah, I agree. Besides, aren’t I supposed to be the leader?” Beakington shook his head. “I think Stardust has become the de facto leader regardless of what you decided before.” “Then why bother designating me as the leader in the first place?” “Beats me. So how do you want to do this?” “Hey, River,” Squirt called, “do you want to play cards?” I glanced to my right and saw Squirt shuffling a deck of cards with a purple diamond on their back. I was intrigued by the prospect and wondered how they differed from our playing cards back on Rhod. Beakington picked up on this. “You go ahead. I’ll handle the ‘recruiting.’” “You sure? I’d feel bad foisting it on you.” “Well then, you can ask Squirt to join us,” the griffin said simply. “Hey, Squirt, we formed an Alliance against Annuity. Do you want to join?” I whispered “Not really.” He answered quickly. “Annuity and I have an understanding: I stay away from her and in return, she doesn’t pick on me.” “Cool,”  I replied, envious. “How’d you get that arrangement?” Squirt laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. “My sisters are really well-connected…” “I don’t suppose you could get that for me too?” I asked, only half-serious. “River!” Beakington scolded, with a hint of betrayal in his voice. Squirt shook his head. “No can do. It’s a long story, but what I did will only work once.” “No problem,” I said. “Let’s play.” He taught me to play a game called war. For its imposing name it was incredibly unexciting. There was no strategy whatsoever and solely depended on the luck of the draw. “So you got your colors back I see.” “Yeah,” I said, having forgotten about the ring. “I’m surprised no one else has commented.” Equestrian playing cards were surprisingly similar to Rhod cards. The only difference was that the cards went from one to thirteen with no jokers, aces or royalty. This simplified things a bit, but the game lost a bit of flavor for it. Then again, with sitting royalty, face cards may have been controversial. As my eight defeated Squirt’s six, he yawned as I took the first game. “War is a good first game since you said you’d never played cards before, but it’s a snooze.” “You mean you’re not having fun either?” “Naw. So you want to try something else?” “Sure!” At this time, having overheard us, Thaumaturgical and Beakington came over. “Can we play?” the colt asked. “Perfect timing,” Squirt remarked. “How about a round of go-fish.” Murmurs of agreement came from behind me as Thaumaturgical and Beakington pressed the closest desks into service to create a larger playing surface. When they explained to me how the game worked, I was once again, struck by the simplicity. “Do you have a thirteen, River?” “Go fish,” I said, prompting Spectacle to draw. “So, Squirt, what do you like to do, anyway?” Beakington asked. “I can’t say I’ve had the pleasure of your company much before.” “I can’t tell if that’s sarcastic or not,” Squirt said with a chuckle. “A curse of my accent I’m afraid,” Beakington lamented. “It’s fine,” Squirt said. “Let’s see, what I probably like the most right now is Runelock: the Sundering. I’m a sucker for booster packs.” “Me too!” Thaumaturgical said, enthusiastic. “I’m not very good, but we should bring our decks sometime and we can play!” Squirt shook his head. “I’ve asked before. We’re not allowed to bring our cards to school.” “Oh…” Thaumaturgical said. “I can’t say I’m acquainted with the game, but what do you enjoy about it?” Beakington asked. “Got a two?” “Go fish,” Squirt said. “What I like is that the game is so well-balanced. Even the common cards aren’t completely useless and there’s a deck type that can make use of them. Naturally, it’s not perfect, as Warlocks, Inc. wants its money so they keep printing overpowered incredirare cards. I’ve gotten one—ever. And I’m lucky. “What’s the game about?” I asked, as we continued to play. “It’s kind of hard to explain,” Squirt answered. “Basically, there are rune cards, creature cards, resource cards and upgrade cards. What you try to do is build a civilization while warring with your opponent. First player to accomplish three grand feats is the winner.” “Sounds complicated,”  I said, starting to regret I had asked. “It’s better than it sounds. I assure you,” Thaumaturgical added. The conversation stalled there and we finished the first game, with Beakington coming out on top. As Squirt shuffled the cards, Beakington tried to rekindle the discussion: “Anypony here like hoofball?” “Not really,” Squirt said. “It’s not for me,” Thaumaturgical answered. “I respect the athleticism it requires, but I just don’t like the aesthetic of the game.” “No…” I hesitated. Since it was a colt thing, I considered lying to fit in, but I would be clueless if pressed. “Oh…” Beakington said, deflated. “I’m not a huge fan myself, but Deadeye did something amazing yesterday! He made a brilliant play with his wings and tripped up one of the defenders. Instead of doing a wraparound, he knocked the pegasus off balance by subtly flicking a couple of his feathers. And…” Blank stares came from around the playing table. “Well, I guess you would have had to have seen it…” I was grateful to not be the focus on the conversation, but unfortunately as they cycled through different topics—fishing, woodwork, magical fireworks—I had little to no input. Still, I wasn’t alone in this respect. In reality, the mishmash group of acquaintances had little in common. When it became my turn to discuss what I liked, I simply raved about the agility course Rainbow had taken me to. They were polite and listened, but none of them were the athletic type. Later that day, after completing my homework early, I found myself without anything to do. I felt a tightness in my chest as attention zoned in on my new filly body. It was unnerving. I anticipated anxiety, disgust and malaise, so I immediately threw myself into exercises to keep busy. However, after hopping on and off the bed a few times in my weighted horseshoes, it became pretty clear I had pulled a muscle. Naturally, Celestia rushed an earth pony medic to me when she found out. He gave me some bitter herbs and massaged my hind leg. This soothed the tension, but he still cautioned me against physical exertion for the next twenty-four hours. Once more left alone with my thoughts, I hopped up on my bed to reflect on my day. It was a fairly mundane day all-told. Fizzle had been her usual peppy self, Pestle had prodded me, and I had made it through without any major incident regarding my secret. I supposed I should be grateful to Beakington III in that regard. Perhaps he would make a good friend. In fact, all of them might. I scratched my head in pause. Then again, our little game session had shown we didn’t have much in common. I supposed Beakington and Thaumaturgical had to have some common interests to be friends, but if they were related to collecting bugs, I would have to pass. Why did I need friends anyway? I wasn’t even supposed to be a foal. Yet, I sure am playing the part of one, I thought somberly. I really was cornered in that regard. I couldn’t interact with adults anymore without being treated like a child, and younger foals were an even worse option. Like it or not, these older children were my peers. It’s not that bad… Wait! What am I thinking? I can’t get used to this. I’m not supposed to be a pony! I’m not supposed to be a foal. And I’m most certainly not supposed to be a filly! I can’t get complacent or this world may keep adapting me. I heard a knock on the door. That’s strange. Celestia said she wouldn’t be checking on me tonight? Who could it be? Expecting Flower Power with a message, I was surprised that my visitors came up to eye level. “Hi, River,” Pink Diamond said. “Say, why didn’t you tell me you changed your coat colors? I was telling Annuity that you’d been replaced by an imposter.” “What do you mean? Doesn’t she alway look like this?” asked a small unicorn filly. She? Oh, that’s right. I’m a filly to all of these exchange students... “River, are you shaking?” Diamond asked. “N—no…” The pegasus filly in the back stepped forward. “I suppose I should take point, since it’s my idea. Hello, River, my name is New Moon. Princess Celestia suggested that to be a better friend, I needed to practice group interactions, so Pink Diamond offered to help me find some ponies to hang out with. Would you like to join us?” “Uh…. what?” I had spaced out, distracted by the brownish-red filly’s oversized bat wings. She was on the taller side with a thick coat. Rounding out her appearance was a curly, light-purple mane and tail. She giggled. “Let’s start over. My name’s New Moon. It’s nice to meet you, River Glade.” “Yeah, you too,” I murmured, shuffling my feet. Tentatively, the third filly, a unicorn, stepped up. “Umm… I’m Cake Slice. It’s nice to meet you.” “Yeah, same,” I said no more enthusiastically. “We were going to meet in my room, but since we’re all here that would be silly,” Pink Diamond said. “Mind if we chat in here for a bit?” “Talk? About what?” The fillies giggled, entering and closing the door behind them. I retreated towards the bed as they continued their ominous advance. Abruptly, the three of them sat down on their haunches in a small three-quarters circle. They patted an open spot. Shrugging,I filled in the missing geometry. “Thank you for helping me, Diamond.” New Moon said. “No problem,” the crystal filly replied. Am I being inducted into some bizarre cult? “Anyway, I needed some ponies because of what Princess Celestia taught me in my friendship lesson. She says I’m a very loyal friend, but I have problems in groups, so she advised me to get some practice.” “That must be nice. I haven’t had my first lesson yet,” Cake Slice said. “You’ll love it!” New Moon proclaimed. “You can tell she’s really put a lot of thought into these lessons.” I had to stop myself from snickering. The fillies picked up on this, however. “Umm, yes, she is very wise. I was just remembering my friendship lesson with her.” I gave an abbreviated recap of the fake advice I had offered the Anti-Annuity Alliance. I went quickly since Diamond had already heard. But from how attentively she listened, it would have been nearly impossible to guess. “I think I like your lessons better than mine,” Diamond declared. “I don’t quite understand what she was getting at with mine.” “Maybe we can help you!” Cake Slice said. “Okay! What she told me was that in looking for friends, you sometimes have to be selective. Some ponies you could overlook might be hidden gems—beautiful diamonds.” The other fillies nodded along. “But then she said that others might be more coarse. If the right pony finds one of these, she can bring out its luster, but most ponies will just get hurt because they’re unrefined. "Hmm… that is confusing,” New Moon agreed. How much help should I give her? I wondered. It was obvious what Celestia was trying to teach her, but maybe she was trying to be subtle for a reason. “I...I think I know,” Cake said. “Oh! What!? What!?” Pink Diamond said, bouncing in place. “Maybe Princess Celestia wants to say that you can learn how to be a gem cutter and turn the ponies that are rough on the outside into hidden gems!” “Ohh! That makes sense. You’re so smart, Cake.” The white-coated unicorn blushed. “...Thanks…” “At school there’s this filly called Annuity who I’m having trouble making friends with. That must be the princess’s way of telling me not to give up!” I motioned to facehoof, but instead pressed a hoof just below my horn. Well that backfired. She just promoted herself. “Speaking of school, how are you liking it? You and River go to Canterlot First, right?” “Yep,” Diamond said. “It’s really fun! The teacher does this funny thing where she claps her hooves together and says ‘moving on.’ It’s like a catchphrase! There’s the colt named Squirt who says funny things sometimes. And there’s a filly who makes pretty jewelry, though I was too slow to buy anything. We have a green griffin colt as well a minotaur filly named Iron Jill; she’s kind of scary sometimes, but she’s probably nice I think. I did have a bit of an embarrassing incident today, though.” “Tell us!” New Moon implored. “Well, we were working on exponents in school, and Mrs. Fizzle had just taught us that the small number at the top is the exponent, while the larger number is the base. However, just before our time was up, Annuity argued that it would make more sense for an exponent to expound and we might be able to impress her by getting the secret answer.” There’s a surprise… “And, I got the answer wrong. It was an easy problem, too.” “Oh…” Cake said. “I’m sorry, Diamond, that’s always embarrassing, especially when it’s something the teacher just explained. You must have been blushing up a storm,” New Moon said fondly. “Yeah I was! But that’s not all! The second time around the room, I volunteered to redeem myself. Turns out I overthought 1^1 and got the answer wrong again!” “Is math a hard subject for you?” Moon asked. Diamond’s ears drooped. “I’m usually good at it, but now everypony in the class must think I’m stupid.” “Don’t worry about that,” the bat filly urged. “First impressions can be tough, but if you keep working at it, your math prowess will shine through.” Feeling bad that I was sitting on the sidelines I cleared my throat to make a token effort against Diamond’s obliviousness. “You know, don’t you think that Annuity’s explanation was kind of ridiculous? I mean, why would a math problem have a secret answer? I think she was trying to trick you.” “Pffft. Why would she do that?” Diamond said, waving a hoof dismissively. “She was just thinking outside the box; and it was my fault for not knowing better. Besides, the second wrong answer was all me. I don’t get why you don’t like her, River. You should give her another chance. She’s really smart and good to her friends.” I lowered my head in defeat. Would it be possible to save this filly from herself? “At our school we have a stallion teacher named Extra Credit. He’s really good,” New Moon said. "We don’t have griffins or minotaurs, but we do have a zebra girl named Mindre. She’s still learning Equish, and her mistakes can be funny at times. I mean, I try to not laugh at her, but sometimes it’s too funny not to laugh.” New Moon then launched into a story about how she awkwardly tried to engage her crush, a batpony colt, at lunch. She complimented his wings and stammered a bit about not wanting to imply that pegasus wings couldn’t be just as pretty, but he didn’t seem to mind that much. She then went on to describe how athletic, smart and funny this colt was. I managed to extract from her that they were the only batponies in the class and had to wonder if this was the basis of her attraction. Taking advantage of the pause in the conversation, I turned to Cake Slice for a hopeful change of subject. “I feel like it should be your turn, Cake. How are you liking Canterlot Second?” “Oh… I’m still trying to make friends. I really have a hard time with that. There’s this filly named Bulwark—I think her name is. She’s somewhat imposing, but she’s actually been very nice to me. I flashed a smile at her. “I know Bulwark. I’m in the Junior Guards program with her.” “Really!?” “Yeah. She can get a bit prideful about what she does, but otherwise she’ll make a good friend.” New Moon started tapping a forehoof. “Anyway, since I’ve already shared, I figure we should dive into what we’ve all been waiting to talk about!” “Oooh! Oooh! Our favorite music?” Pink Diamond tried. “Nope,” the batpony said flatly. “Is it baking?” Cake Slice tried. “No!” New Moon said, exasperated. She then turned pleading eyes towards me, imploring me to reassure her we were on the same wavelength. “Hoofball!” I blurted out through a splitting grin. “Come on, girls! I mean colts! What’s girl talk without talking about colts?” “Eh, colts are okay,” I offered weakly. “Do I have to spell it out!?” New Moon asked. “Crushes—I want to talk about crushes.” The room went silent, but Moon wasn’t to be deterred. “Diamond, do you have anypony you like?” “Not yet,” Diamond answered. “I’ve only been at school for two days.” “Heh,” Moon laughed. “I guess I move quickly. River, you’ve been established at school longer. Got anypony you like?” Wanting to kill this topic as quickly as possible, I said, “Nope. In fact, I don’t even like colts!” “Really? You like fillies, River?” Diamond asked. “N—actually, yes. I only like fillies,” I said, seizing the opportunity. The fillies exchanged glances and giggled. “Cake, do you have anypony you like?” I asked her, trying to take the attention off of myself. The unicorn filly flicked her purple mane with gray and black stripes. “No, I’ve actually never had a crush…” “Really!? Never?” Moon asked in disbelief. Cake shook her head. “I’m fifteen, and I haven’t had a crush yet. I’m not sure I’ll ever have one. Sorry I can’t really relate to the discussion…” “You’re only fifteen?” Diamond asked. “Unicorn years.” Cake explained. “I’m about the same age as you guys.” “Oh, I keep forgetting—we only use earth pony years in the Crystal Empire.” She sighed. “I miss my family already.” “Me too,” New Moon agreed. “Same…” Cake said. “Yeah, same,” I said, completing the chain. “What’s your family like?” New Moon inquired. “Oh, they’re great. My parents are blacksmiths. They’re hardworking and down-to-earth ponies. And then there’s my brother, Frequency Vibrations. He’s always dancing to his own beat.” Frequency Vibrations, huh? That’s a stupid name—even for a pony. Luna silently slid into my room like a wraith. The four of us had talked all the way until curfew. It had been tedious at first, but I had gradually warmed up to the fillies, albeit not by much. I had to embellish bits about my family to share, but it had been fun to come up with pony names for my siblings. “How can I help you?” I asked when she arrived at my the bedside, without opening my eyes. “‘Tis much of nothing,” Luna explained. “Tia merely wanted me to check on you since she can’t be seeing you every day anymore.” “What’s the difference?” I asked. “Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of giving me less princess face time?” “My alibi is that I’m here to ward off a particularly bad spell of nightmares.” “That’s true in a way. If you could keep my dreams from turning weird like last night’s that’d be great.” Luna nodded. “I’ll stay as long as you want, but neither do I want to keep you up. Is there anything that challenged you today?” I rolled my head on the pillow. “No, it was a fairly uneventful day,” I put a hoof to my chin. “Then again… my classmates seemed to know ahead of time that it was going to rain during recess. I’m pretty sure you don’t control the weather with satellites, so how do you forecast?” Luna smiled. “Here in Equestria, the pegasi ponies manufacture the weather. We have factories for clouds, rainbows and snow.” I should have been shocked, but it made sense with what I had experienced so far. Between the princesses corralling clouds to wash away the Dimaryp and Windy Skies’ song, it all made sense now. “I do apologize for not filling you in on this significant cultural difference,” Luna said. “Sometimes the things we take for granted might prove quite surprising to an outsider. My best advice is to ask lots of questions.” “I’ll keep that in mind,” I said, closing my eyes again. Quietly Luna walked to the door and started to turn the doorknob with her magic before stopping. “You do know my sister and I move the sun and moon?” “Yeah?” I said lazily. I blinked. “What!?”