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// I'm Looking. Don't be Surprised if I Facehoof Infinity+2 
// Story: Letters from an Evil Empress 
// by zackepic22 
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Dear Twilight Sparkle, 
 
Huh. Well, this sounds interesting. I really wish you would put more details into lessons sometimes. I do get fairly bored sometimes, and it would be nice to have more to imagine.
 
Oh, well, I guess I’m just going to say it was good of you to make sure your alliances last.
 
I guess I’m just going to have to end here.
 
Really, there’s clearly nothing more to talk about here. 
 
Might as well just finish it with a signature.
 
...Heh, okay, yes, I’m just kidding~
 
You see, Twilight, I have ways of finding things out. You really shouldn’t even question that, really, it’s in your best interest not to.
 
Now, I managed to find out from some reliable sources that a certain White Unicorn and Orange Earth Pony were having a bit of a disagreement? In the storm? Really, that’s probably one of the dumbest places to have a disagreement, but, honestly, I’ve disagreed with others in worst circumstances.
 
There was also something about a tree, but, I’ll come back to that later in the letter.
 
You had a slumber party, didn’t you? I knew you’d be able to make good use of that slumber party book I gave you years ago, now that you actually have friends~
 
...But, I’m guessing it went awry, didn’t it? At least for a while. Applejack’s farm mannerisms quickly started to disagree with Rarity’s classy sensibilities, and vice versa. Applejack probably dared Rarity to get dirty, and, Rarity made Applejack wear something overly pretty, classy or both.
 
They probably ruined almost every single activity you did with them, didn’t they? They probably even ruined sleeping! And, then, you told them as much, because, even you can’t take two ponies going at it to that degree!
 
Now, at some point after that...There was the tree, wasn’t there?
 
It is the Apples’ town, more or less, and they probably pride themselves on making sure the trees are safe during these kinds of storms…
 
But, what I’m guessing Applejack did? Because, the thing I heard about was, that there was a tree? 
A tree struck by lightning?
 
And, part of that tree was lassoed right in through your window?
 
That is just- That is just absolutely facehoof worthy. I mean, really, Applejack didn’t realize that it might not be a good idea to pull in part of a broken tree through someone else’s window?
 
Truly, Apple Stubbornness has reached stupendous—and stupid—heights.
 
Ah, well, it sounds like you got three got that under control, maybe even actually had a pretty good slumber party~
 
And, honestly? You’re not even the one to have the most insane sleepover recently…
 
The day after the incident with my Ex boyfriend, Nightmare and I decided to have a sleepover in my room. I even had a special alicorn-sized sleeping bag made for her.
 
I baked 60 lemon cupcakes, we played games, had s’mores, sampled some of Nightmare’s lemonade—It’s really good, I have no idea how she makes it, she won’t let me in her secret ‘lemon lab’ or anything—and, we even read some stories to each other!
 
Then, about ten minutes before we were supposed to sleep, we played some truth or dare. It wasn’t until the seventh dare that things got truly crazy. I dared her to make some midnight friends in the garden, thinking she would scare most of even the most nocturnal animals.
 
She came back with fifty possums.
 
I had to deal with the smell of burnt possum fur, four-fifths of my lemon cupcakes being devoured by possums, and possums spilling lemonade onto my floor. At that point, I decided to call it a night.
 
Oh, and, what’s worse? She even kept one of them! Named him Tiberius! Oh, sure, he’s cute and all, but, I can tell he’s hungry for my cake.
 
That little possum better stay away from my cake…
 
Anyway, here’s hoping you have more fun and exciting sleepovers in the future!
 
Wary of Possums,
 
Empress Daybreaker
 
Oh, hey, Nightmare, how are you doing?
 
Yes, bribing Spike with that red diamond is the best decision I ever made. Soon, I’ll be able to know even more about what happens with Twilight and her frien-
 
...Wait a minute.
 
What is he doing in here?!
 
Back off from my chocolate-frosted pink velvet, you tree-hanging, dead-playing Marsupial!
 
...Don’t give me those eyes. You can’t trick me with those cute, beady little eyes.
 
Arghhhh, fiiineee! But, one slice only, and it’ll be a small one...