//------------------------------// // Chapter 29 // Story: Yes, My Lady // by Tatsurou //------------------------------// Before long, Sebastian's flight took the pair close to the edge of Ponyville. There, they saw a most unusual pair. Spoiled Milk stood in naught but her sweater - all jewelry gone - as she ranted and raved at the pegasus Diamond Tiara had described. Swooping in silently, Sebastian settled atop a nearby tree where the entire tableau was visible to him and audible to himself and his passenger. "This is all your fault!" Spoiled shouted out angrily. "I'm terribly sorry-" the stallion began in an obsequiously fawning tone. "Oh cut the fake servant act!" Spoiled snapped irritably. "I already know better, there's no one around to fool, and it's getting annoying." The stallion ceased his cringing and servile behavior, standing upright and looking down his nose at Spoiled. "You should mind your tongue," he chided in a much stronger voice with hints of playfulness in the tone. "Remember who you're speaking to." "I'm speaking to an incompetent who claimed to be a Reaper!" Spoiled snarled. Sebastian tensed in response, Scootaloo craning forward in interest as he did. "An incompetent who couldn't even kill my husband properly!" "It's hardly my fault I don't know how to hold my beautiful scythe with hooves I've never had before!" the stallion countered in an aloof, offended tone. He waved one hoof dismissively. "Given how clumsy these are, you're lucky I even managed to wound him...not that his death would have done you any good-" "A last will could have been contested in court if he hadn't filed the divorce proceedings while alive!" Spoiled snapped back. "But a living will doesn't present that option! Because of your ineptitude, I've lost everything and have no legal means to get it back!" "And what do you expect me to do about it?" the pegasus taunted cruelly. "You certainly can't take it out on moi." "No, but you can help me fix it!" Spoiled snarled. "Starting with that blasted lawyer! Kill him, read his record, get his papers, and we can change the Last Will enough to nix the Living Will completely...especially if that blasted Applejack just so happens to kick the bucket, too!" "You really think you can get away with that?" the 'Reaper' questioned darkly. "I have a Reaper in my pocket!" Spoiled snapped out. "Who's going to stop me?" "That would be us," Scootaloo spoke up coldly, nudging Sebastian with one hoof. He immediately flew down to land before the pair, letting Scootaloo step off his back. Spoiled rounded on the pair. "You!" she spat with venom dripping from her voice. "I don't know what your involvement in this is you flightless brat, but-" "On my authority as Head of House Wingshadow, and on the evidence presented to me, I find you guilty of conspiracy to commit multiple murders, including that of your ex-husband, Filthy Rich," Scootaloo declared in her Noble voice, letting it echo and reverberate through the field. She enjoyed watching Spoiled's face fall off as she pulled out her family crest. "You are granted no plea, no rights, no representation. The judgement of the Shadows is swift and final. Sebastian!" "Yes, My Lady?" Sebastian responded immediately. "Sebas-chan!" the stallion squealed eagerly. "My, my, you do look quite handsome as a griffon! All black is truly a good look for you..." He fluttered long eyelashes Sebastian's way. "Though it could do with some red..." Reaching into his wings, he pulled a crimson chainsaw out and licked the blade. "...Grell Sutcliff," Sebastian groaned, not liking having this particular suspicion confirmed. "What are you playing at!" Spoiled shouted angrily. "They're going to kill me! Protect me you idio-" "Oh, do shut up!" Grell snapped out angrily, revving his chainsaw to life and swinging it. However, his grip was somewhat clumsy. Rather than a lethal strike as he probably intended, the strike took Spoiled in the mouth, damaging teeth and tongue and sending her flying away. "I finally found my dear Sebas-chan, and I will not let you get in the way." "So why are you involved in all this?" Scootaloo asked flatly. "How did a mare like her get the assistance of a Grim Reaper?" Grell chuckled darkly. "Why, I was simply passing through this part of the multiverse in search of my sweet Sebas-chan, and heard her complaining about a pure black griffon by that name!" he purred wickedly. "I sensed a demonic contract in effect somewhere, and I thought there was a chance it was him! So I tagged along and did her dirty work, to see if it would lead me to him...and so it did." Scootaloo groaned irritably. "Is he always like this?" she demanded of Sebastian. Before Sebastian could respond, Grell snorted disdainfully. "'He'? Of all the nerve!" His voice took on tragic overtones. "Just because I was cursed with the wrong gender when I came into existence is no need for you to deride this beautiful woman just waiting to flower dazzlingly-" "Then why didn't you apply for the Gender Reassignment Spell this Friday with the Princesses?" Scootaloo asked flatly. "That particular spell's been on record for five centuries, though it takes alicorn magic to permanently alter that fundamental aspect of a morphogenetic field, so the Princesses make a day available every third Friday of each month for anyone who needs it because their minds and bodies are fundamentally different genders. There's even spells to check for that, though they were originally developed to detect the effects of brain washing." Grell stared at Scootaloo, completely slackjawed. "You...you have that here?" Scootaloo glowered angrily. "Not for you anymore. Sebastian! This is an order! Feed him his own wings, then shove that 'scythe' of his up his plot blade first!" Sebastian and Grell both blanched. "His...plot?" Sebastian inquired in confusion. "The other hole that's spouting nothing but horseapples!" Scootaloo snapped back. Sebastian grinned viciously. "Yes, My Lady!" he purred before moving into a battle stance. Grell feigned a tragic air. "Ah! Once again, my love, we are doomed to fight! As Reaper and Demon, we are forever doomed to be on opposite sides-" His attempt at a dramatic pose was flawed as he fumbled with his scythe. "Uh...can you give me a minute to get better acquainted with hooves?" he asked hopefully. Sebastian's grin widened as he flexed his talons. "I'm afraid not," he purred wickedly. "I am...under orders." He lunged forward. Somewhere in reality, a tall human with short, neatly combed brown hair, yellow-green eyes, rectangular spectacles and wearing a dark suit worked calmly with a pruner to trim a particularly stubborn tree. He was distracted from his work by a whimper of pain. Sebastian smiled up at the man. "I believe you misplaced this, William," he purred softly before dumping Grell at his feet and vanishing. William T. Spears looked down at the de-winged Pegasus choking on his own feathers and bones...then winced as he heard the revving of the scythe and saw its location. "...what have you gotten into this time, Grell?" he growled irritably. Grell could only whimper in agony. Spoiled, as it turned out, survived the strike from the Scythe. However, its magic had affected hers, permanently robbing her of her ability to speak, a damage no Equestrian magic could repair as it was forced upon her with the magic of death. As such, Scootaloo decided she was to be locked up for life under the Wingshadow authority, granting her no appeal, possibility of parole, or visitors. In thirty years time, she would undergo psychological testing to determine if she could be reintegrated into Equestrian society. With that done and Spoiled handed over to the Guards to carry out the sentence, Scootaloo and Sebastian made their way back towards Sweet Apple Acres. "...Sebastian?" Scootaloo asked curiously. "Yes, my lady?" Sebastian inquired diffidently. "Was...was it really necessary to tie his tail around the handle to lock the chain in the 'run' position?" Sebastian chuckled wickedly to himself. "Did I indulge too much, My Lady?"