"'Oi, Spy!"
"What, bushman?"
"You see anything out there?"
"I think you would know if I did." He took out his disguise kit and lit a cigarette, blowing out some smoke.
I groaned. "At this rate, the heat'll kill me before those wankers even get 'ere," I muttered.
It was high noon on Dustbowl. Clouds of sand drifted slowly through the lower areas of the third stage, and the blazing sun loomed overhead, scorching the dead land. Rusted metal, extreme heat, and an unsavory amount of dehydration. All par for the course.
It was so incredibly bright outside that I almost missed a bullet exploding Spy's head.
"ACK!" I jumped, surprised, and fumbled for my rifle. "Incoming!" I yelled, and took aim.
"Dammit boys, go go go!" our Soldier called out, charging out of the barracks.
The rest of the team followed shortly after, ready to fight off the BLUs. The RED Demoman took a stance on the bridge with his Medic behind him, ready for a fight. Solly stood just beside them, rocket launcher at the ready.
The first BLU came around the corner just a second afterward, a scout equipped with a festive scattergun and a very spooky looking ghost hat. He doubled jumped around the corner and came barreling towards the RED Demoman, scattergun at the ready.
"Come on scary hat, let's do t- AAAGGGHHHHH!" he screamed, a bullet, my bullet, flying through his skull. He landed face first on the ground just below, splattering blood on the scorched earth beneath him.
"Wanker."
The rest of the team moved up, closing the gap between them and the corner. Soldier took the front, leading the pack.
Just then, a BLU Demoman followed by a Medic came into view. He shield-charged the RED Soldier and was given a rocket to his face in compensation, sending Soldier flying across the bridge. The Demoman stopped in his tracks and put away his sword, pulling out a grenade launcher in its place. Our Demoman preempted him by lobbing a few grenades, prompting the BLU Demo to jump out of the way and return the assault. They continued like this, lobbing grenades at one another, when Soldier rocket jumped over the Demoman. He flew over the BLU, pulling out a shovel as he dropped, intent on killing. The Medic, however, had other ideas. Pulling out an Ubersaw, he charged at the descending Soldier and landed a critical hit, killing him instantly.
I groaned in frustration, charging a shot, only to feel the wind of a bullet passing by my head. I jolted in surprise and looked over at the corner, only to find a BLU Sniper scoped into his rifle. I quickly adjusted my aim, changing targets to the Sniper, and fired a shot. He reacted quickly, rolling out of the way of the shot, and fired his own. I dodged to the side, narrowly avoiding his bullet. We silently observed each other, waiting for one of us to make the next move, when a ball collided with the BLU Sniper's face. Surprised, he grabbed his forehead, only for a cleaver to dig its way into his skull. I looked over to see that our Scout had finally come out of spawn, and was quickly charging around the corner.
I turned back to the bridge and saw the two Demomen fighting at close range. The BLU Demo had managed to close the distance between the fighters, forcing them into a melee battle, one which he would clearly have the upper hand in. He swung his sword at the RED Demoman, who blocked his blow with a shield. He landed a bottle of scrumpy on the other man's face, sending him back a few paces, only to be charged by the BLU Demo. They collided, sending the RED Demo to the ground with violent force. He stood above him, victorious, and prepared to deal the final blow, only to be distracted by the sound of a Medic in pain.
"Huh? ACK!" He flipped around as our Spy drove a knife into the Medic's back. "You back-pokin' snake!" he yelled, running for the Spy. Unfortunately for him, I was prepared. I fired a shot into the back of his head, killing him instantly. The Spy looked up to my balcony and smirked.
Demo got up, brushing himself off. "Took ya' long enough."
Spy rolled his eyes. "Oh, please."
Their conversation was interrupted as Scout ran around the corner, covered in flames. "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!" he screamed, falling to the ground completely limp. Spy quickly cloaked, while Demo busied himself reloading his grenade launcher. A Pyro flew around the corner, followed by a Heavy and his Medic, minigun spun up.
I scoped in, ready to fire off a shot, when I heard the gentle sound of a decloaking mechanism behind me. I flipped around, seeing the figure of a Pyro. I immediately recognized the spook, and unsheathed my Kurki, chuckling to myself. "Stabbin' time."
I kicked him to the ground before he had any time to react. He hit the wall with a loud slam, dropping his disguise. "Merde," he said, jumping to his feet. I immediately charged him with my kukri, narrowly missing the Spy as he dodged my attack. I repeated the action, violently thrashing my blade at him. He whipped out a revolver, landing several shots into my chest. I stumbled backward in pain, clutching my torso. He laughed maliciously and cloaked himself, escaping the encounter unharmed. I swung where he cloaked to no avail; he had escaped.
I realized how hurt I was, and ran out to find some health. "MEDIC!" I yelled, running to the bridge, only to find the remains of a bloody battle. The Heavy and his Medic lay in pieces on the bridge and our Medic had been shot down by his minigun. The Demoman smoldered as flames consumed his body, and the enemy Pyro looked up from his kill. He began to chuckle, and charged towards me, his laugh turning into sadistic glee as he revved his flamethrower.
Suddenly, I heard a noise over the sound of the Pyro's flamethrower. A blur of motion came ripping by, as a screaming Soldier clobbered the Pyro with his shovel. He landed on the ground a few feet after, rolling to a stop. He stood up, and came over to the corpse, basking in his kill.
"I just tore you a new chimney, Smokey Joe!"
The Soldier looked over, giving me a thumbs up. I returned it wholeheartedly. "Thanks mate."
"Godspeed," he said, and rocket jumped away.
I went back up to my post, and the round continued on. Soldiers shoveled, Medics ubered, and Spies backstabbed, all concluding in the final minute of the round. The BLUs had proved strong, but not strong enough, and thanks to our teamwork...
"VICTORY!"
...we held them back.
The BLUs retreated, and we gave chase. As they made their way to the first stage of Dustbowl, we locked them out of the area, sealing off their exits and entrances. We would have to deal with them tomorrow, but it would keep them out for the night, at least, so we turned off the respawner.
We celebrated our victory, sitting around a fire and drinking beers. We told stories of the times before we were mercenaries, and placed bets on who would get the most kills the next day.
We had gone on like that for hours, drinking and laughing and goofing off. By the time we had gone to bed, it was already past midnight.
I was the last to go to sleep that night.
It was only a quarter past midnight when I made it to the van. I keep it outside, away from the rest of the team.
I crawled into my van, the one and only, and closed the door behind me. I started walking toward the back of the van, when I heard a faint rapping on the door. Sluggishly, I made my way to the front again. ...who the hell's up at this hour? Slowly, I slid open the door, revealing the vast, empty wasteland of the Dustbowl. But there was nothing there, no teammates or enemies to be seen.
But then, as I slid the door closed again, it hit me. Suddenly, all sorts of alarms went off in my head. A faint knocking, opening a door, nobody there? It's almost like there was an invisible man-
Spy.
What the hell's a Spy doing here? At this hour? I panicked, frantically searching around for his presence, when another knock came at the door, this time louder. I bolted to the door, sliding it open, and prepared to take out my kukri...
When I felt something, cold, hard, and sharp on my back.
"Peekaboo!" he said, driving the knife into my back.
"AAGGH!" I fell to the floor, paralyzed. The Spy stepped over me, shutting the door.
"HELP M- GAH!" He shot me through the arm, cutting me off.
"Sorry to pop in unannounced, but I think you'll find this quite pertinent." His expression was serious and scornful.
I looked up at him with teary eyes, unable to say anything.
"BLU has lost one too many times for our liking, and we've been meaning to hatch a plan to get rid of you. Permanently." He lit a cigarette, sucking in ashy air. "Your colleagues locked me out of our base today, so I had no choice but to put them into action."
The sadness turned to rage in an instant, but all I could do was glare.
"Oh, and don't worry about your team going under... I've got a replacement for you!" He smirked maliciously.
He opened his disguise kit, and it all made sense.
"No worries, mate! HAHAHAHAHA!" he mocked. Midway through his bout of laughter, he was engulfed by a cloud of smoke, and his laugh changed to match my own.
The last thing I remember was the image of my own body standing over me, laughing to himself. And then a gunshot. And then blackness.
I groaned, moving my hands to my forehead. I didn't feel right.
Suddenly, the memories came flooding back to me, of the Spy, and the base... and my death. So that's why I didn't feel right.
I opened my eyes, slowly taking in the area around me. I didn't see anything until I looked down. There was castle, and a large, expansive village below me. Trees dotted the landscape to the North and to the West, and a large, open plain stretched out under me.
Wait, UNDER?
Twilight suddenly awoke, startled by the noise of something nearby. "What the..."
It sounded like a stallion was screaming about something, but the noise was getting louder...
She wiped the weariness from her eyes, just to make sure that she wasn't imagining it.
"Spike?"
"Huh... Wh-what? Oh... Yeah, Twilight?"
"Do you hear that?"
He looked at her confusedly, until a pang of realization struck him like a truck. "Oh! Yeah, I do! What is it?"
She bolted up from her bed to a nearby window, and began searching for the source of the noise. "I think somepony's in trouble!"
"Wait, seriously?" He got up from his bed, ready for action. "We gotta-"
Something flew by the window, heading downward at an alarming pace.
"-woah! Somepony just fell by the window!"
I groaned as the thorns in the bush stung at my sides. It may have cushioned my fall, but it still hurt like hell. I looked to my sides, checking for anything else that might end up hurting me, and slowly got up from the bush. I stood up next to it, observing the landscape. There were a massive amount of trees in the distance, and a large, expansive plain in front of me. To my side, there was a large town with thatch roof buildings, and behind me, there was a massive, towering castle. I turned around to face it, witnessing the indent that I had left from my fall in the bush.
"Oh my gosh, are you alright?" a feminine voice said.
When I turned back around, I had to grab the bush to stay balanced. There was a pony. With wings. And a horn. Staring at me. With big beady eyes.
"Good God... I've died and gone to hell."