When Rainbow honed in on the runway, preparing for a stiff, frozen landing, she spotted a group of Wonderbolts standing on the sidelines. Surprise and Wave Chill were the first ones she identified. The prospect of spending another day training with him filled her with dread. Unfortunately, that was nothing compared to the knowledge that she was almost definitely about to be grilled to hell and back by the third Wonderbolt she noticed, Spitfire.
Rainbow fought off a nauseous rumbling in her belly as she focused on her landing, trying to block out thoughts of her impeding mortification. Maybe she won't chew me out in front of everypony? Maybe she'll wait until we're inside, or something? Rainbow drew closer, and her eyes registered Misty Fly, Soarin, and Fleetfoot. It took her less than a second to realise they were all watching her descent. That's it, Rainbow. Keep lying to yourself, that'll get you off the hook.
Bracing herself (more for Spitfire's chastisement than her landing) she pulled in hard, angling her snout downwards as her body followed suit, slicing through the altitude in almost no time, aligning herself at the last moment, retaining her momentum. As her front hooves touched base she shifted her weight to her front half, stalling her movement a little before bringing her rear hooves down, buckling them slightly.
Unfortunately, her flight suit was still very wet, and gave no real grip against the tarmac, causing her to skid forwards much faster than she should have, rather than allowing her to come to a complete stop after a few paces.
While Rainbow had originally planned to land about ten yards before her colleagues, she found herself skidding right past them, their eyes following her as she slid along the runway, Spitfire silently judging her actions.
Realising that her motions would quickly become even more out of control, Rainbow dug her front hooves in harder, provoking a small aching sensation, before kicking off once more. Eyes closed, she backflipped in a looping spiral, wings extended, and landed gracefully, before slowly folding her wings and opening her eyes.
Unfortunately, she had chosen to land directly in front of Spitfire, who bore the mother of all scowls. Rainbow was sure it was too late to run, and her close proximity to her commanding officer was probably about to make everything that much worse. Unwittingly wincing in Spitfire's direction, she tried to devise a strategy to minimise her public humiliation, painfully aware that she was still soaked from head to toe.
Five seconds passed without so much as a word from any of those present, the only sound coming from her rubbery, wet latex suit as she shuffled her hooves in trepidation. At this point, Rainbow wondered just how long Spitfire would keep this up, concluded that it'd be a long damn time, and went with her gut, which told her the easiest way to get out of this was to just make her excuses and zoom off.
Quickly steeling herself, Rainbow spoke hurriedly, eyes averted. "Hey, Spits, sorry I'm late, won't happen again. Gonna go clock in now, okay?" Crap, did I really just address her like that? In front of everyone, too? Guess I'm really screwed now.
Rainbow knew it was best to fly now and deal with the consequences later, but couldn't help stealing a quick glance at Spitfire, looking to assess just how much damage she had done. What she saw froze her in place, its absurdity was almost chilling.
Spitfire was smiling. Not in her usual authoritative way, Rainbow noted, nor was it the genuine grin she had seen a handful of times before. This one definitely looked forced, and that worried Rainbow especially.
When Spitfire started to speak, it got worse. "Well, hey, Rain Rain!" Spitfire's voice was a few degrees higher than usual, sounding exceedingly girlish, and just as forced as her smile, "Me and the guys were just coming out of a team overview meeting, but it's real nice for you to turn up! Honestly, we all really missed you in there."
Holy crap, team meeting? We had one of those today?! No wonder she's pissed, I'm over an hour late! If Rainbow wasn't already drenched to the point that her flight suit was essentially see-through, she was sure that she would have started sweating through it right then. Hold on, Rain Rain? Registering the new pet name, as well as the knowledge that she had missed a meeting on top of everything else, Rainbow found herself gawking, bewildered.
"From the look on your face, I'm guessing you never bothered to look at the files I gave you yesterday?"
Rainbow's silence was all the affirmation Spitfire needed.
This seemed to spur on Spitfire, whose smirk widened, although it never reached her eyes. "Well, it's no biggie really. I mean honestly, an awesome Wonderbolt like you? I'll bet you've already got the entire routine down, taught it all to your team members, and are completely ahead of schedule as we speak, right? Honestly, you of all ponies deserve a bit of a lie in! If you're not too tired, however, I'd love to see the work you've been doing."
This time, Rainbow tried to say something in her defense, but all that came out was a stutter filled babble.
"Oh, is there a problem?" Spitfire's mock confusion was painful. "Maybe I'll ask one of your team mates, then. Surprise! Front and centre!"
Surprise emerged from the crowd of Wonderbolt onlookers hurriedly, chewing her lip, glancing between Rainbow and Spitfire, who were still barely a head apart.
This time, Spitfire spoke as she usually would, although her smile remained. "Surprise, have you or have you not perfected the three pony show routine as of this moment in time?"
Surprise was silent for a moment, then spoke in a meek tone. "Ah, well, we..."
"We most certainly have not, ma'am," Wave Chill cut in, his words dripping with malice.
Spitfire's forced pleasant demeanour briefly fell. "Did anyone ask you, private?" Spitfire gave him less than half a second to respond. "Then don't start flapping your damn lips. I asked Surprise, not you. Guess what, if I wanna know about your sudden hate boner for Rain Rain, I'll ask you, not her, but right now, I don't really care." Wave seemed to blush slightly at the term 'hate boner', causing Spitfire to laugh momentarily, before turning back to Surprise. "So, what about it? Has she taught you both or not?"
Surprise flashed an apologetic look at Rainbow before regarding Spitfire. "Ah, you see, ma'am, we--"
"Oh for the love of Celestia please spit it out, I haven't got all day."
"We're getting there, ma'am, but we're not done just yet."
Surprise's voice was stronger this time, which Rainbow couldn't help but feel a little pride at, and to top it off, Wave had been torn off a strip, this wasn't so bad, really.
Then, Spitfire turned back to her, and that almost sadistic, fake smirk appeared on her face once more as she stared Rainbow down, who was beginning to feel more and more trapped under her gaze. He was just the appetiser, wasn't he?
"So, Rain Rain, things aren't going too well with the team either, huh? Must be trying, attempting to get a team to learn something completely new in such a short space of time, exhausting even. I can understand you wanting to stay in bed." Then, Spitfire looked Rainbow up and down, as if she was only just noticing the state of her. "By the way, did you fly through a storm cloud on your way here?"
Of all the crowd gathered, not a single pony dared laugh. They had seen what happened when Wave spoke up, and likely didn't want to make the same mistake, not when Spitfire was like this.
Rainbow knew she couldn't go on without responding indefinitely, so she tried her favourite deflection tactic: Disregarding nearly everything Spitfire had said and latching onto one point.
"No, ma'am, I'm very sorry for the state of my uniform." Rainbow Dash spoke stolidly, daring to keep her focus on Spitfire.
"Whoa, sweet cheeks, chill! Permission to speak freely, Rain Rain, it's cool. In fact, just call me Spits from now on, really."
"Please, ma'am, I'd be much more comfortable--"
"No, really! It's fine. Call me Spits, call me whatever you like, no sweat."
Rainbow glanced left and right, looking for a means of escape; Rainbow found nothing. "Uhh, okay, Spits. Well, basically, um, what happened was I had to go and find a petsitter really short notice this morning and I really didn't know we had a meeting which is totally my fault, and when I got back my uniform was still in the wash and I didn't have time to dry it and--" she felt herself melting as she spoke, and was actually glad when Spitfire cut her off.
"Oh, a petsitter?" Spitfire enquired, mimicking curiosity. "I can see why that would be important. Out of interest, what pet did you have to sort one out for?"
"Uhh, Tank, ma'am. He's--"
"Spits", Spitfire corrected.
"Sorry, I meant Spits!" Rainbow jittered where she stood. "He's my tortoise." Why are you torturing me like this?
"I didn't realise you had a tortoise! How cute. Of course, I can understand you needing to find someone to look after him, you wouldn't want him running off, after all." If Spitfire had put any more effort into being caring, she might have burst a blood vessel.
Rainbow, on the other hand, felt about as big as her tortoise, she only lacked the hard shell. Seriously, she's taking this a little far now, isn't she? I get it, I screwed up.
The other Wonderbolts didn't seem to share her sentiment, however, as a couple began to snicker at Spitfire's last comment, causing her to spin around, eyebrows raised.
"Something funny?" she barked.
Soarin was brave enough to answer. "No, nothing at all, Spits."
Spitfire didn't miss a beat. "Call me Spits again and I'll have you cleaning the food court for a month."
Soarin knew better than to question it. "Sorry, ma'am, excuse me, ma'am." he cowered, his earlier courage soon forgotten.
When she faced Rainbow again, she still bore that dreaded smile. "Sorry about that, Rain Rain. You were telling me about your tortoise?"
Rainbow shivered where she stood. Whether it was from the wet and cold or the conversation she was having, she was unsure. "A-Are you really sure you wanna sit here and talk about my pet?"
Spitfire leaned forwards, nodding ecstatically. "By all means, I'm interested! Honestly, Rainbow, I never would have took you for the type to have a pet tortoise, being so fast and all, but--"
Rainbow could take it no longer. "Why are you doing this?" she sighed, helpless. This treatment just felt like a snide new form of belittlement to her, and she couldn't take it much longer.
Luckily, Spitfire desisted, and her false smile finally vanished. "Why?" she echoed, visibly irate now, no longer holding it back. "When you're trying to organise a bunch of shows in short order and you've got fliers being complete pricks," she glared at Wave, "Fliers not learning the routines, and 'bolts not turning up to the team meetings we hold to deal with these issues, see how you feel when the mare you're relying on turns up flipping drenched and then has the audacity to address you so casually?"
Rainbow was actually grateful for this part, she had been anticipating it so long that she thought it would never arrive. As much as she hated it, she knew she would have to sit through the rest of the scolding without a word out of place, her career could depend on it, for all she knew. For a moment, she thought that question wasn't rhetorical, and opened her mouth to speak, but Spitfire wasn't finished just yet.
"Yes, Rainbow Dash, of course I'm pissed. And I'm so sorry if I embarrassed you, but it's nothing compared to the joke you're making out of this entire team when you start screwing things up!" Spitfire turned to face the rest of the Wonderbolts. "And that goes for all of you! Soarin, enough of the backchat, it stops now. Surprise, you're a competent flier, have a little more faith in yourself, you've always been Wonderbolt material. Wave, Rainbow, play nice from now on. I want to see total synergy on these teams, and I'm going to get it, understood?"
A chorus of 'yes, ma'am' sounded.
"Good. New orders: We're putting off the merger for another three days, as there's clearly still problems that need to be ironed out. In the meantime, all groups will refer to their instructors on matters of authority, regardless of rank. Basically, Wave Chill, if Rainbow says jump, you say 'when can I come back down' unless I personally say otherwise, got it?" Spitfire acknowledged the petulant nod with one of her own, before spending a second in thought. "That's another thing. Rainbow clearly needs a new uniform, someone see to it that she's changed into something dry. Also, everypony has my full permission to call her 'Rain Rain' from now on, seeing as she seems to be a fan of the stuff."
A few muted chuckles, but this time Spitfire didn't bite. Rainbow couldn't help but feel as if she was getting off easy at this point, considering the build up, her punishment didn't seem very severe. Honestly, 'Crash' was way worse.
"Also, I'm putting you each with team coordinators from our new show assistance groups to help smooth things along. Now, these guys don't necessarily know much about choreography or stunts, but they should be effective at ensuring fairness and boosting morale. Misty Fly, you'll be introducing Skyline Surge to your team, treat him with respect."
"Got it," Misty responded briskly.
"Fleetfoot, you've got Alpine Peak on your team, try not to piss her off."
"I'll give it my all, ma'am."
"Soarin, you've got Shalissa. She's one of those one name mysterious types. Really knows her stuff though, you'll like her."
Soarin only gave a stiff nod. Rainbow figured he might still be walking on eggshells after her food court threat. No one wanted to clean the food court, Wonderbolts were generally messy eaters.
"And finally, Rainbow Dash. You've got Zephyr Breeze." At this point, a smile returned to Spitfire's face, and it was every bit as real, mischievous, and vengeful as it appeared. "Also, you're working for free today, don't bother clocking in."
Rainbow barely had time to form the syllable of the word 'what' on her tongue before Spitfire shouted 'dismissed' and flew off, leaving Rainbow to ponder how the hell that had just happened.