//------------------------------//
// Ponyville - Deadlift 
// Story: Escape From Canterlot 
// by No one is home 
//------------------------------//

Dear Usagi,


You probably won’t get this until you guys are all the way in Las Pegasus.  At this rate you’ll have a whole new show running by the time me and Z get out of Ponyville.  Honestly, we should have stuck to the plan and just swapped trains at the station.  But it seemed disrespectful not to let Z visit Surprise’s grave.  I should have known what was going to happen.  The damn pink ghost…


I know, she’s not the REAL pink ghost, but I’ll be damned if she ain’t just as damned scary.  And there weren’t no way I was ever getting out of Ponyville quietly with her adopted sister and her niece.  I tried to explain that we had to avoid royal attention, but YOU try explaining anything to the literal magical embodiment of laughter.  Z didn’t help none, “The Princess Twilight is not a stinky face royalty, the Princess Twilight is a friend of the Train Wreck and the Surprise!”

 
Well that, I can tell you now, was that.  There isn’t anything I can say or do that carries more weight than, “Big Sister Pinkie Pie says it’s alright,” or even worse, “Z’s sister Surprise said that Z could trust the Princess Twilight," or even  "The Surprise said when she was gone Z-978 should listen to the Twilight and Big Sister Pinkie Pie.”  Hell, if I tried to argue there’s a pretty good chance Z might decide she couldn’t trust me.  I was only only buddies with “the Train Wreck”, those other two ponies had Surprise herself vouching for ‘em from beyond the grave.

 
Jesus on a pogo stick, my biggest fear right now is that the Princess of Friendship will send a letter to Canterlot just to prove that we don’t have anything to worry about.  Hell maybe we are worried about nothing.  But after what happened to Diane...  
 

What she did was fifty shades of wrong, don’t get me wrong, but they literally exiled her to pony-hell.  She was just a kid.  These royal horses, girl…  Maybe her highness is right and Celestia is just the nicest god-horse ever.  But she sent Diane to hell.  And Surprise’s good friend on the hill who never even came to her funeral never batted an eye.  Z don’t like Prince Silver not one little bit.  I don’t blame her.  We’re headed out tomorrow, one way or the other.


Love,
James “Deadlift” Jackson


P.S.
Train Wreck needs to be kicked in the balls for leaving Z with a kid like he did.  I’m just sayin’.  I know Z likes to make herself look like she’s an adult changeling, but even if she was… dammit man!  She’s clearly not right in the head.  I wonder if Celestia even thought about what was going to happen to Z and Facehugger when she shut down the Canterlot hive?  Obviously Fast Change couldn’t care less, so long as they let her back in with the “good” royals.  It’s a damn shame, everyone in Decanter always thought so well of her.