Ember was smart, or at the very least brilliant in combat as Chrysalis would state. Sure Chrysalis might not have weighed nearly as much as Ember did in pure muscle, but the Changeling Queen had her outclassed in skill only. They each had their particular combat styles, though seemingly having similar capability far away with ranged weapons, close up they were completely different in the execution of how they went about a fight. Chrysalis, when she was actually taking a fight seriously, did things in a cold precision and sometimes with viciousness. Ember in comparison was more pragmatic when it came to a fight. Instead of stopping to think, Ember was willing to use anything available to her to win a fight and was more open to doing things quickly since every second would count in a dangerous situation. This is why Ember had been chewed out by Rarity about her devastated EVA suit and had complained about having to fix her own, but she did thank Ember for finding her. Rarity made Ember another EVA suit as the dragon’s previous one was completely trashed and she didn’t even charge Ember for it.
It was strange that Ember was thinking back on that at this moment, especially where she was currently tasting the asphalt that made up the road for the third time after another distortion bubble and forty frozen shocking spheres of energy had been unleashed in all directions. She was actually surprised that she was actually going to stop and consider the things she had learned about Faxel, like how electricity was actually pretty effective in harming her. Chrysalis would have likely killed Faxel and would have been done with it by now; Ember probably would have asked for her help if nobody wanted the target alive at least.
Ember thought the Changeling Queen would have made a decent bounty hunter, but she didn’t think Chrysalis could suffer too much idiocy despite bringing her own particular brand of idiocy and insanity to the table. Ember at least had morals that were not specifically centered entirely on her race like Chrysalis and to earn her paycheck she had to actually bring this annoying guy in alive, just like any other bounty that was capture only. It really depended on the payout, the danger involved and the general unpleasantness of the target Ember was dealing with whether or not she would kill the target. If the individual needed to die, then Ember had no compunctions about killing them unless they had important information or was at the very least important for another reason entirely. There were just some people you didn’t let live, even some capture only target needed to be taken out.
What was it that separated Ember from others bounty hunters in this kind of job and why was she currently thinking of Chrysalis right now? At the end of any day Ember still had her heart in the right place and Chrysalis would have thought outside the box about this problem, like crawling up into the mouth or anus of a cobbled together dragon sized corpse monster. Right now Ember’s heart was telling her to rip Faxel’s head from his body, but she was holding back admirably from actually doing that and didn’t think she actually could get at him to achieve such a miraculous feat anyway.
The one important thing Ember noted was that Faxel didn’t seem to be doing anything lethal and he only seemed to be outright going for maximum annoyance potential. Sure Faxel had injured quite a few civilians, but none of those injuries were permanent and Ember couldn’t just kill him knowing this. In this situation she had to calm down and not let her anger control her, which is probably how the little snot wanted her and the others to be acting. She sat up and calmly grabbed Gilda’s shoulder, an idea just struck her and acting was a keyword in that thought process.
“You okay Gilda? I’m sorry about throwing you clear like that.” Ember had taken that last one for her hoard and it had definitely stung a bit, she would scrub her scales later.
“Yeah, I’m good, thanks for the save by the way. Now if there was something we could do about that guy…” Gilda focused on Faxel as he slapped at his butt while grinning at her, he even pulled down his eyelid at her and gave her a raspberry. She smirked and held up the wheelchair and he looked perplexed, Gilda gave him the bird and since she was avian already, so it was technically a double bird. “Yeah I got it back no thanks to you, you lily pad livered bastard, go eat some swamp muck!”
“Ding Ding we have a winner, care to try again and actually catch me this time!” Faxel shouted from quite a distance away before cackling, he was definitely trying to gain their ire and the chase had been quite a merry one. He revved his invisible hover bike and shot off once more. “You may win an all expenses paid vacation to shock therapy land!”
“We need a plan.” Maud had dealt with plenty of tough customers; she’s never met a tricky one like this though. There was still a slight frown on her face as she looked to Ember. “Have any ideas?”
“Yes, I do in fact have an idea.” Holding up a claw Ember pulled out her data pad and hoped that it still worked, she’s lost a lot of data pads before and this time wouldn’t be any different considering all the electricity she’d been hit with. It surprisingly still turned on and she could use it. “Hold on a second, I have a call to make.”
“I should probably call the Boss Lady and tell her that we got Sassy’s wheelchair back at least, but that guy is still out there and I want a look at his equipment…” Gilda heard Rarity’s voice coming from Ember’s pad, she decided that it was taken care of the griffon turned her gaze to the odd silent stare from Maud. Gilda realized that she had phrased what she had recently said. “I mean the hover bike of course, I’m a mechanical engineer and I want a look at the technology behind it. I’m involved now and I want to get something out of the messes he’s been causing.”
“Sure, whatever you say.” Came the flat response via the Maud-a-tone voice. “I’m sure all his technology is just as small as he is.”
-
“Are you even able to stand up Sassy?” Rarity’s group had finished having snacks and now they would either go shopping or at the very least get Sassy back to Caravel Boutique for some rest. Hearing something, Rarity swiftly pulled out her data pad and took the incoming call. Sassy was still sitting right where she was and the others had gotten up to leave. “Hello… oh hello Ember, what’s the matter darling? Oh thank goodness for that at least, we’re in Streusel City at a very nice ice cream shop between fourth and triangle. It’s a very popular location so you probably can’t miss it. Yes Sassy seems to be feeling better and it’s quite nice of you to ask, but we need the wheelchair. Huh… another reason for calling? If you need Trapeze then why are you calling me? Oh right, you don’t know how to contact her or any other members of my crew… I’m dreadfully sorry about that. Oh pish posh dear, none of that now. So what will you need of Trapeze once I do contact her?”
While Rarity was busy talking, Sassy turned to look at Pinkie, Babs and Chrysalis. She frowned and whimpered at what she was about to ask and she didn’t know Pinkie well enough to ask her, so it had to be Chrysalis because she didn’t think Babs would be prudent to ask for help.
“Chrysalis, could you maybe help me… get to the bathroom.” Sassy didn’t like feeling weak, but one use of magic for her charged sword slice and she was finding it hard to stand. She really didn’t like looking weak and she clutched her sheathed blade to her chest like a security blanket, at least she could ask. “I’m sorry if I’m being a bit of a bother asking for help like this.”
“Sure, but you’ll have to wipe your rather radiant backside yourself if this is a number two. Stick with Rarity and the pink dodo my little snack; we’ll be back in a few.” Chrysalis lit her horn and hefted an embarrassed looking Sassy into the air with her magic; she then proceeded to slowly walk off towards the public restroom. A unicorn could not levitate themselves because they were the anchor point for the levitation spell and gravity alteration spells didn’t seem like Sassy’s cup of tea. “You’re pretty embarrassed about this and I can’t really understand why, you ponies and your weird emotions.”
“Well excuse me if I feel a little unnerved about being carried to the toilet like this. Well since you can read emotions… is anyone present in there at the moment?” Sassy really didn’t want to deal with anyone asking questions in a public restroom.
“Not that I can tell at the moment, I still don’t understand why most people are so embarrassed about natural bodily functions. It’s as nature intended and if that’s embarrassing, then high society can go screw itself for all I care.” Pushing the door open, Chrysalis walked in and floated Sassy in behind her. “I fart because I need to and if you think that’s disgusting then I’d like to see you go for the rest of your life without a butt.”
“Does it always come back to butts with you?” She had been told about it, but Sassy didn’t believe anyone when they said Chrysalis focused a little too hard on butts.
“Yes, are you saying your life doesn’t always come back to the backside or even revolve around pleasing it and worshipping butt enlarging gods? What a sad existence you must lead, now let me clean out a stall before I set your rear down.” Chrysalis opened a stall and like all public restrooms it was disgusting. Disgusting things didn’t matter to Chrysalis, but it did matter to Sassy and she was a pony of some class like Rarity obviously. She’d be right at home with a dingy place like this. “It was either a little kid or someone who’s a jerk that did that, I’m leaning the latter. I’ll check the other stalls to see what I have to work with, I’ve never really cared for public restrooms.”
“Thank you, for thinking of my needs.” Friendships were started on less innocuous statements. “I can’t say that I care all that much about public restrooms either.”
“You’re kind of broadcasting distress right now, I guess you really need to relieve yourself. I was available to help you out and then I decided to do so. I prefer happy love spewing ponies, so you’re welcome to laugh, smile and show some love.” Well it seemed like Chrysalis was doing the right thing so far, she had yet to upset Sassy personally and that was a win in her very small book of victories. “I wanted to at least be considerate of your hygiene before I plant you on something you’ll regret sitting on later. Well at least a pony might regret it; I hardly ever need to use a toilet personally.”
-
“We’re almost done here anyway; no I have no problem with helping Ember. Okay, I’ll get right on it!” Trapeze tilted her hat down and bounced in place slightly as she shoved her data pad back up into her hat. “Well guys, hold down the fort, I’m needed elsewhere. Bernard you’re in charge until I get back, do you have any problems with that Rover? I’m quite responsible for the both of you; so please don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”
“No, Rover is having no problems with that whatsoever, is good having strong predator friend.” At least Rover was okay with this, but he was feeling a bit off lately. He wasn’t sick, he would know if he were. Could it be that he was missing Spot and Fido? Well he had a good life right now and it was at least better than digging for the rest of his life, plus that didn’t mean he would forget how to dig. Who’s ever heard of a Diamond Dog that forgot the feeling of dirt between their claws? The Boss Lady might like cleanliness and hygiene, which was definitely something Rover understood as being important. Diamond Dogs have been slowly improving in the very subject, but like them he still enjoyed getting dirty. “It means being less likely to be eaten by a predator yourself.”
Bernard just waved a paw in Trapeze’s direction, he had it covered. If he didn’t, then he would fix it so that he did have it covered. He was after all Trapeze’s number one assistant and she was his beast bait.
Trapeze set out from the room to rendezvous with Maud and Ember, Gilda was already flying the wheelchair back to Rarity.
-
“So Vera doesn’t want to be forgotten, my Saffron doesn’t want to be alone, Greta wants Gilda and possibly for rainbows to start spewing out of every one of her orifices. I personally want to keep cooking delicious food fit for a princess and a Baroness is close enough.” Coriander smiled at all of the ones he spoke of and then turned to the last one. He became a little stern with the last one they needed to discuss. “We however haven’t gotten around to what you want Ms. Pommel.”
“I just want to be useful.” So far things have been going pretty well for Coco and this small social party was a big hit with everyone.
“Yeah I can see that clearly… I can see clearly that it is not a real answer. What is it that you really want Coco?” Greta clearly wanted to know what made Coco tick. Of the things Greta knew, she was a shy mare and she made clothes. Where was that special pizzazz that ponies had for being unusual in Coco? She seemed too normal to be real and that was coming from a griffon sitting at a table with Mare-Do-Well and the amazing disappearing mare. “What kind of dreams do you have going on in that sweet little head of yours? We’re all friends here and we’re getting along, so what’s got you so scared of us. We’re all sharing our dreams here and yes, I do eventually want a rainbow to at least fly out of my mouth once. Hopefully it won’t be liquid rainbow though, that stuff doesn’t hit the tongue quite right.”
“Well our technical engineer has a point and I don’t mean about wanting to experience something as odd as spewing a rainbow out of your mouth.” Taking a sip of her fruit juice, Vera looked Coco in the eyes with a concerned expression. She reached across the table and grasped Coco’s hooves. “Which is something the elements of harmony can do apparently, but we’re not talking about magical artifacts. We’re here to talk about ourselves. What kind of dreams do you have outside of clothing and sticking, if almost religiously at that, so tightly to your cutie marks abilities?”
“Promise me you won‘t think it’s a bit weird, concerning the fact that I’m a rather petite mare.” Yes, a petite mare that had a powerful punch when she got angry enough. Coco had surprisingly waited to freak out until she was back to safety after having voluntarily gone onto Antilur during the crisis.
“Go ahead, it can’t be worse than Saffron wanting a sidekick.” A giggling Greta had thought Saffron complained a little too hard about not having a sidekick and that led to an interesting discussion about the classic comic book heroes that were known as The Power Ponies. Greta liked the comic book heroes well enough, but she personally had issues with the characters being vastly different on a power scale to each other. The recurring villainous earth pony was interesting, until she disappeared at a honey festival with Radiance after becoming friends with her.
“Hey, it gets lonely patrolling for ne’er-do-wells all by myself I’ll have you know!” Defended Saffron with an exaggerated tone of aggravation, she was smiling about it though. “So what is it Coco, what’s your big secret.”
“Well… I’ve always been a fan of… wrestling.” That caused a few confused looks and Coco hoped that they’d at least understand.
“Is it just the costumes or the whole shebang? Rarity probably wouldn’t want to get into a mud wrestling match, not with how she gets complaining about having to clean detritus off of her personal EVA suit or fix the damage to the other suits.” At least Greta thought things were going well, nobody laughed and they all took her interest with seriousness because they weren’t about to laugh at the hard working sweetheart of the crew. “You know, just to clarify things.”
“Yes the costumes are a large part of it, but I’d say it’s the whole… well everything that goes into it as well.” It was a little more than surprising to Coco that nobody thought her interest was strange.
“So do you want to do some wrestling? We can start our own little league and have some fun with it. Would you like that?” It wasn’t exactly the healthiest sport to get into, but it was the least dangerous if done right and Vera had no problem with it. “I will have to remind everyone here that I’m a therapy provider and not a doctor by any stretch of the imagination, so don’t blame me for being incapable of healing the injuries.”
“I don’t know, my imagination can stretch pretty far…. I wonder how Gilda is doing.” Greta says her imagination can stretch far one second and the next she’s immediately thinking about her grumpier other half. Maybe a quarter if they start a herd with Tree Hugger and anyone else.
-
Gilda’s feathers were ruffled, she had finished dropping off the wheelchair and Sassy was able to get around again. Now she was sitting there with Trapeze, Maud and Ember.
“Okay a one pony circus act, a geologist who likes to rock hard, a bounty hunter with a golden heart and an awesome mechanic walk into a bar. What do they all have in common?” Not a love for the smell of motor oil, of that Gilda was certain.
“A headache and a dent or two in the bar of course, mostly depending on how thick our skulls are and what material the bar is made of. We’d all be wearing glasses soon enough afterwards.” Trapeze took off her hat rubbed her head, curious as to why Ember needed her assistance. “I would like to get to this problem you were telling me about and why exactly did we come to a bar in the first place?”
“I need alcohol. I need you to perform a few tricks for me. I’ll need Gilda with me for this and Maud I need you to clear a section of the city. Hey barkeep, give me something along the lines of one hundred and ninety proof please.” Ember tapped the bar and a bottle was placed before her by the bartender, she paid for it after having looked at the proofing on it and nodded to herself. She double checked it by sniffing the contents and nodded again, that was definitely the right alcohol level. “We’ll tell you what we know about Faxel and why we’re having so much trouble with him. The guy is tricky with his technology, so how would you deal with a tricky problem? Well I considered it and then I figured an obtuse solution would do, so I decided to get an expert on magic.”
“I’m not an expert on magic, I’m a magician.” One would think the two were the same thing, but Trapeze didn’t seem to think so.
“That doesn’t matter; I just need you to perform to your best for what I have in mind. I called you in so you’re getting a cut of this bounty if you pull this off.” It was a brilliant idea to Ember, to catch a trickster you needed one and the plan she had thought of would be glorious after having watched Trapeze in action personally. “Here’s what you’re going to do after we make a few more purchases…”
-
Faxel wondered where his chasers were, he hadn’t seen them in a while and he caused quite a bit of chaos to attract their attention. So why hadn’t they come after him? Had they finally wizened up to his game? It wouldn’t be the first time he’s eluded a bounty hunters grasp or frustrated them hard enough that they gave up. He stopped at an intersection and felt that something was off.
“Hey there, do you like games?” The sound of Trapeze’s voice caused Faxel to tense up; he swerved his bike around to see the top hat wearing pony. Said pony was balanced perfectly on the streetlight on one hoof, while the rest of her body was poised above her like a diving griffon. Space stations were either well lit or dark with street lights, it helped people keep a sense of normalcy when there was something like a day and night cycle going on. It was what was considered daytime in deep space and Trapeze usually liked performing in front of a crowd, this time she was making an exception given this guy attacked her friends. “Heard you were a tricky customer and that you liked using weird devices, I’m a mare of tricks myself and I don’t believe there is enough room in Streusel Station for the likes of you!”
Pushing off the light with her hoof, she flipped up and backwards to grab the streetlights horizontal bar and twirled around it twice before launching herself forwards towards Faxel. Said Foggre had quick reflexes as the somersaulting mare flew at him. He pulled his right gun and fired several shock orbs and was immediately surprised to find that the mare fell short of him and hadn’t intended to strike him. She simply leapt around and through the shots with the greatest of ease; he just fired more and was kind of astonished that she continued to move toward him despite the fact that her every instinct should be telling her to run.
“Now don’t tell me this is the best you got?” Trapeze tumbled under one shot that shot up towards her face, jumped over the next that flashed between all four of her legs and then just calmly trotted forward at a slow pace as the last one missed her without even ruffling her mane. She tilted her hat and bounced on her hooves in place, shifting her legs ever so slightly and smiled at the frog. “Have I got a rhythm for you, now let’s make some magic!”
Trapeze whipped off her hat and pulled; with a bit of a struggle she pulled out a large metal ring. Faxel was a bit mystified by it, considering it was larger than the top hat it came out of. The mare smiled at him and sat the ring on the ground near one street corner of the intersection they were at and then spun it, when it came to a stop the mare was gone and the ring was just sitting in place.
Hearing a whistle Faxel turned and saw the mare at another street corner with another ring and she was smirking. He fired three shots in her direction and the spinning ring absorbed them all, when it eventually stopped spinning Trapeze was no longer there either.
Faxel looked to a different street corner and realized something, the area was empty of pedestrians and there were no vehicles here. There was the one mare spinning another ring and disappearing behind it again as if by magic, but she didn’t have a horn. Turning to the last corner he saw another ring that was the same size as the others already set up and the mare was holding four large jewels in her two hooves.
“I really dislike blue hedgehogs and their special zones; they always take so darn long to get through… anyway I’m sorry about the delay on that last one.” Nothing was more confusing than what Trapeze had just said and Faxel clearly showed it, considering she seemingly set it up before the third ring. And here the alien frog thought he was the expert at shock and awe. “So wait, judging by your expression you’re saying that no time passed for you? Oh good, then I won’t have to explain where I got these emeralds from. The universe probably wouldn’t like it if I accidentally crossed wires over somewhere.”
Trapeze tossed the four so called emeralds into her hat and smiled as she pulled something else out. A five foot metal balancing pole, now Faxel was more curious than flighty or aggressive at what the mare was going to do now. What she pulled out next was a unicycle, of which she hopped onto immediately and within seconds she found her balance.
“Let me show you how magical I’m about to get!” She shot forwards towards Faxel she swung the pole for his face with a rightwards swing; he smiled and deflected the pole with his bare hand.
With the redirected momentum Trapeze spun in a clockwise spiral outward and then back in slapping the back of his helmet with the other end of the pole causing it to crack a bit. Faxel hadn’t been able to redirect that or even react to stop the blow in time, his helmet seemed rather uniquely fragile to Trapeze. Faxel was a little more than shocked and he pulled his left pistol and fired the distortion bubble while riding away from her. Trapeze rolled her eyes and quickly pedaled backwards towards one of the standing rings watching Faxel as she did and disappeared as she went through it and beyond the edge of the ring off to the side.
The ring she had been closest too had been caught in a distortion bubble and Faxel was already on the run only for a metal bar to knock him off his bike when his neck rammed into it. Trapeze had come out of a different ring while taking a jousting position on her unicycle to successfully intercept him. The frog sat up and watching as his hover bike sped off for a distance without him and then the griffon and dragon from earlier came down and seemed to grab at the air and flew up and away from the ground. They just stole his bike, they couldn’t do that!
Faxel was about to say something expletive, only his world turned gray after the distortion bubble shattered knocking him onto his face. Once the side effects died off and released him, he stood up and was now facing down two earth ponies. One the smiling magician twirling the staff behind Faxel and Maud Pie was standing directly in front of him with a flat if slightly angry demeanor. Now Faxel was no longer happy, but he did reach up to his helmet and hit something. If they wanted his hover bike so badly then they could have it, in a million pieces of course.
There was an explosion in the distance and parts rained from the sky and two slightly singed winged beings were slowly dropping to the ground. The dragon looked the better of the two and their infrared goggles turned to him. The griffon in particular looked really mad about something and her slightly burnt wings and furious look on her beak led Faxel to believe that maybe she wanted a bike just like his, Faxel would build another as he still had the blueprints in his noggin.
“Keep him from running by moving my rings around, but remember that I’m the one that has to deal with him for now. Who knows what other tricks he has up his metaphorical sleeve, I know I have plenty up in my hat.” The smirking Trapeze had cornered a cretin, how queer it was to think that she was doing a bounty hunters job. “You want a challenge; well coming right at you live is Trapeze Star! I’m an acrobat and magician extraordinaire and for my next trick, I will be dancing with my volunteer Faxel J. Frog!”
Faxel narrowed his eyes and tightened his hands into fists and smiled before laughing, this sounded like so much fun to him! He moved forward firing his right gun and Trapeze kicked her unicycle forward, the metal in it attracted the electrical orbs and absorbed them. Faxel leapt onto the unicycle and managed to avoid being shocked by the electrified metal, he smiled at Trapeze when he stopped it.
“You think I’m crazy? I think you’re crazy too!” Cackling as he balanced on the unicycle holding his right pistol, Faxel was prepared to have some real good fun and this mare seemed like she could give it to him.
“I really would like the deposit back on the unicycle, so don’t ruin it. Now let’s dance!” Stabbing her pole into the ground she bent it slightly and went flipping forward and intended to slam it down on Faxel. Instead he redirected the momentum backwards, the pole stabbed into the ground again and Trapeze slid down it twirling while leaning backwards. She launched a rear hoof at Faxel’s facing using the momentum of her twirls. There was something uncomfortable about the way she danced around the pole after that deflection with a friendly smile as she came back around and kicked the unicycle out from under Faxel.
“Well come on big boy, don’t keep a mare waiting.” This at least gave Trapeze an idea about how difficult Faxel would be to land another solid hit on when he landed on his feet after losing the unicycle. “You know, I think my acrobatics teacher might have been a stallion pleaser...”
“Let’s hold a revolution, dance and dance alike!” Faxel giggled insanely at Trapeze who currently had her rear legs wrapped around the pole and was hanging on it upside on it.