//------------------------------//
// Dancing With Stallions 
// Story: Equestrian Fanfiction 
// by Lise 
//------------------------------//




Okay, smart alices, what do you have to say about my fanfic?! 

For your information I was twelve at the time and still had a far better understanding of prose and grammar than you, Max! If I didn't have respect Jade I'd have been at your insignificant little house right now, letting your neighbours (and the entire village) know what I think about you! Not even Lyra, Luna, or Dark would be able to save you from what I was about to send you your way!

So, sure, make fun of me, why don't you? And I'll have you know that provided the political climate of the time it was normal for me to reach such literary conclusions. Need I remind you that, save for a few, nopony had even heard about Nightmare Moon? Mythology was a subject reserved for geeks and aside for, a few scholars nopony gave it any serious thought. It was entirely within reason for me to try and overcompensate by putting every possible creature inside! And, no, I didn't self insert myself! If you want to know that main hero was based on my father (or what I thought he would be since, you know, both he and my mother died when I was four!)

But, let's not go into that right now. I, just curious what you all found so terrible? Looking at it now (yes, I reread the entire thing) the pacing is passable, the style adequate (even if it was nearly a copy paste of popular coltfiction authors of the time), the plot was an ensemble of cliches, by no means worse than the majority of stories that appear on this very site. Are you jealous that I was able to use my own money to get it in print? Is that it?

Number1







You have to admit it was pretty boring, Blue. As I told you at the time, the first five enemies get killed in the exactly same way. And I'm still not sure what the purpose of the story was. 

"I killed all, now let's marry?" Much wow, pone, much wow.

CEOWitch 







Whoa! I had completely forgotten about that. You used to write it during summer break, right? I used to envy you so much back then. The day you got that published I secretly bought a copy then refused to talk about it. Pone, I'll probably cringe if I read it now, but at the time it was the hay! 

Good times. Good times. :) why are you still using that old emo nickname, by the way? You back into painting your mane black again?

BlueEyes







@Number1: Hey, you didn't make it difficult for us to mock:




Simon spun around kicking his first opponent in the face with his heel. Three was a sound of broken glass as the scoundrel's teeth spilled on the ground, followed by a loud thump thrusting him through a nearby wall.




So, apparently humans have teeth of glass. Also, please tell us how a bipedal creature would kick someone in the face with its heel? Oh, and those convenient paper walls :)




There were five of them and one of Simon—not unusual odds, save for that being his third night without eating. If they were to battle fair and square he'd probably lose after taking out the first three attackers, if one of them knew high magic, he might not even make it that far.




So he usually faces five opponents (not shown before or after). And he hasn't eaten for three full days? Or did you mean he usually eats 24 hours, thus not eating at night would make him cranky?




"You might kill me, but you'll never crush my warrior's spirit!"




Please say this in real life! Any context is fine. I really want to witness that (and also see how many ponies manage not to barf :))

RRBB 







@RRBB: Are you testing me, filly?!

Number1







Definitely! You're 12-year old self, that is ;) You really were such a stereotypical colt. I've probably read that book ten times and each time I said to myself "Mare, this is such trash!" Still better than anything Max has written, though. 

Now to be serious. Liked the world and some of the ideas, but you could have used an editor... badly. Writing is good, but the story is a mess (if I'm being generous) If you want I'll edit the book and send you my version at some point. Or at least a very long list of questions for you to fix, if you want a second edition.

RRBB 







Are you hitting on me right now?

Number1







Blue, buddy, the entire site knows you present no interest to her. And you must admit she got you. Stars I forgot how terribly bad it was! Argh, my eyes! :)

@BlueEyes: I had forgotten that part. :) We were such idiots. Still best vacations ever. 

CEOWitch 







Okay, I admit, it was terrible. But that's no excuse! When you're twelve everything you do seems great. I spent six month on that before I got Auntie to agree to get it published. Best spent allowance ever. 

Just to let everyone know, if it wasn't for that attempt Mistmount Chronicles might never have appeared. I don't need to tell you how limited coltfiction is. Most deals with the same old questions time and time again with a new paint if setting. 

Number1







Hey, @Number1, are you reading submissions and stuff? My friend really has some great stuff to show you (if she wasn't so self-critical :/). She goes by the nick EndlessHearts if you're curious.

RRBB







Did you just plug the work of your gf?!? Filly, I like you :) Sure, send me her stuff (everypony else: too bad, she got the idea first. No dice for the rest of you).

And don't bother about editing my "book". I just get annoyed when ponies start criticizing it at random. (Reading it ten times has earned you the right.)

Number1







@Number1: I'm sure StarChild has read it more than that. I bet she even found the dialogues romantic. :P

CEOWitch 







I think you'll be hearing the sound of broken glass real soon...because she'll kick your ass the moment I tell her about this. 

Number1