//------------------------------// // Extra Crazy // Story: Best Young Flyer // by bookplayer //------------------------------// Rainbow Dash woke up with her face buried in somepony’s mane. That was pretty normal. What wasn’t normal was that this mane didn’t smell like perfume or styling products, like the groupies or the ponies she picked up at clubs usually did. This mane smelled natural and... familiar. Like somepony she knew. She grinned as she suddenly remembered what happened last night. This was so much cooler than some stranger. Last night had been awesome, and this morning there would be no awkward conversations and good byes. Just two ponies hanging out until it was time for Dash to head to Ponyville for her visit with her friends. She actually couldn’t wait for Scoot to wake up. Dash carefully lifted off from the large cloud bed and hovered over Scoot, close enough to whisper in her ear. “Scootaloo... hey, Scoot.” “Mrmph. Ten more minutes,” Scoot said in her sleep. “Having a good dream?” “Mmmhmm,” Scoot answered. “It gets better if you wake up,” Dash said, giggling. Then she nibbled the tip of Scoot’s ear. Scoot turned her head and half-opened her eyes, still groggy. Her eyes shot open the rest of the way when she saw Dash hovering above her. “Oh gosh, it’s real?” Dash landed hard on top of her, laughing. “This feels real, doesn’t it?” “Oof! Yeah. Real.” Scoot started to grin. “So we... oh wow. Wow. Last night was... wow.” “Yes it was,” Dash happily agreed. “Should I, um, make you breakfast or something?” Dash laughed. “Scoot, this is my house. You don’t even know where the kitchen is.” Scoot’s face fell a little. “Oh. Yeah.” “I barely know where the kitchen is, to be honest. I usually eat out,” Dash said. Her cloud house was really more of a cloud mansion, as was befitting a Wonderbolt. It was really impressive, with enough bedrooms for all her friends in case they ever came to visit. But it was usually easier for her to go to Ponyville, and Dash traveled a lot with the Wonderbolts, so she never saw most of her own house. “But hey, I’ll take you out for breakfast,” Dash went on. She flew off of Scoot and landed on the other side of the bed. “So what are your plans for today? Gonna practice those corkscrews?” Scoot smiled apologetically. “No. I mean, I totally would, but I have to meet Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle out at Sweet Apple Acres. Sweetie’s in Ponyville for the weekend, and we don’t get the chance to hang out much anymore. But I’ll try to get a little practice in, I promise.” “Don’t sweat it. You think I don’t know that friends come first? I was headed to Ponyville today too, I try to go every week to see the girls. We could fly together.” “Really? Cool!” Scoot said. “Where are you guys hanging out?” “The spa.” Dash had to laugh at the disbelieving look on Scoot’s face. “Trust me, this beauty is 100% natural. But after the action you gave me last night I could seriously go for a massage... good job, by the way.” “Thanks! You were...” Scoot searched for the words. “Exactly as unbelievably amazing as I thought you’d be?” Dash grinned. “You wanna come back here after?” “I’d love to, but...” Scoot hesitated. “I kind of have work tomorrow. All my stuff’s at my place, and I really should sleep.” Dash laughed. “No problem. I leave tomorrow for a show in Las Pegasus, so I should get some sleep too. I don’t think Spitfire would like it if I let you wear me out again.” Scoot blushed, but she was still grinning. “But we can do this again sometime, right? I mean, if you want.” “Oh yeah. I definitely want. How about next Friday I pick you up after work, take you out on the town, then we can spend the weekend together?” “Oh my gosh, that sounds amazing!” Dash grinned and gave Scoot nuzzle on the cheek. “Cool. Let’s get cleaned up and hit the sky.” • • • A few hours later Dash flew in the front door of the spa in Ponyville, just a little late for her weekly meet-up with her friends. It was only after she’d learned that all of the Wonderbolts, male and female, got hooficures regularly that she’d finally given in and agreed that the spa wasn’t a bad place to get together and talk with her five best friends. She still avoided the wraps and facials, but a hooficure or a massage wasn’t out of the question and the hot tub was fun. Besides, it let her see the girls, something she always tried to make time for. There was no way that getting to be a Wonderbolt was going to cost her the friendship of the ponies who’d helped to make that dream a reality. “Heya,” Applejack said with a smile as Rainbow Dash flew over. “Hey!” Dash said happily, landing on the next lounge chair over from where Applejack looked like she just got a massage. In the hot tub Rarity was telling Fluttershy and Pinkie about her new coltfriend, while Twilight sat on another lounge getting her horn filed. Applejack hadn’t changed much in the years since Dash left, but Sweet Apple Acres certainly had. A second little house had been built there recently, right after AJ planted the peach orchard. The cause of all of that was a pretty peach farmer from Atlaneighta, Peaches N’ Cream, who was supposed to move into the new little house with Applejack after next harvest. Peaches was daintier then AJ, but could spend hours talking about farming and made a peach pie that gave AJ’s apple pie a run for its money. She was apparently showing Applejack how to buck peaches, a phrase that made Dash snicker every time she heard it. Dash was never above teasing her best friend and former marefriend with stories of her wild exploits, especially now that AJ had retired from that kind of fun. She stretched her wings and gave AJ a grin. “I’m beat... Last night was a work out. I didn’t think she’d ever stop.” Applejack rolled her eyes, as usual. “Did ya at least ask the pony’s name this time?” “Oh, I know her name alright.” “Must be serious then. When’s the weddin’?” AJ said, relaxing and closing her eyes. “Not serious, just awesome,” Dash said happily, thinking about last night. “Me and Scoot are doing this thing where we just sleep together and –” There was a loud crash as Applejack scrambled off the lounge chair. She had her hooves on the lounge Dash was sitting on before Twilight grabbed her in a field of magic, holding her back. “WHAT DID YOU SAY? Tell me ya didn’t just say you’re messin’ around with Scootaloo, cause I’m gonna buck you to next year if you’re takin’ advantage of her!” This was not the reaction Dash was expecting. “I’m totally not taking advantage of her! She’s a grown mare, and we have this agreement. It’s all out in the open, I don’t love her, she knows I don’t love her, and she doesn’t love me. She just thinks I’m hot and wants to sleep with me, and since she’s hot I’m totally okay with this idea. But if you wanna step outside...” Their four friends were staring at them, and Applejack gave the rest of the group an exasperated look. “You can lemme down, Twilight. I ain’t gonna kill her... yet.” Twilight let her go and Applejack returned to her lounge, then glared at Dash. “Rainbow Dash, you’ve lost your ever lovin’ mind. I never woulda thought you could do this to Scoot.” Dash just smirked at her. “You’re just jealous that you don’t have a hot mare who’s just in it for fun.” Applejack raised her eyebrows. “First off, my marefriend is plenty hot, and second, some ponies like havin’ a real relationship. But that ain’t the point.” “She’s right,” Twilight added, also looking none too happy with Dash. “The point is that Scootaloo is already emotionally invested in you, no matter what she says. And she’s so young she probably doesn’t even know it. You’re going to break her heart, and I know you don’t want to do that. This is really irresponsible.” Twilight still lived in the Library, even though she was considered an up and coming magical scholar. She credited her success in part to not getting wrapped up with the Canterlot ivory tower unicorns, thought there was one with whom she’d authored quite a few papers and stayed with any time she was in Canterlot. Twilight claimed he was just a friend, but turning down a room in the castle to stay with somepony seemed more then friendly to Dash. “Hey, Scoot is a grown mare. There’s no reason to think she can’t tell when she’s in love or not,” Dash said, crossing her front legs with a huff. “Says the pony who’s never figured out how to tell whether she’s in love or not,” Applejack muttered. “I knew you’d bring that up! Look AJ, I said I was –” “I was just pointin’ out that it ain’t that easy, Sugarcube. Sometimes emotions can be kinda confusin’ when it comes to love and the like. And for somepony who’s just barely a mare, that goes double.” Twilight nodded. “Dash, look at it this way. You’re way older then her, you have a lot more experience, you’re a Wonderbolt, you’re famous. You know that she worships you. You have all of the advantages in this relationship, it’s almost impossible for you to make an agreement as equals. It’s really not fair to Scootaloo.” “Twilight, come on. I’d never try to hurt the kid! That’s why I’m being upfront about everything. If she doesn’t want to listen to me she’ll get her heart broken, but the same thing could happen with somepony her own age who wasn’t a Wonderbolt.” “Then let somepony her own age break her heart,” Twilight said. “Not the pony she idolizes.” Dash thought about it for a few moments. “Guys, I trust Scoot. She’s an adult, she can handle herself. And at least I know that I’m being honest with her, I’m not gonna lie to her or promise her things I can’t deliver. That’s better then almost anypony, any age would do.” “Well I know I wouldn’t want to see Sweetie Belle involved in something as sordid as this,” Rarity chimed in, stepping out of the hot tub. Rarity still designed out of the Carousel Boutique but also kept apartments in Canterlot and Manehattan, which she visited frequently for fashion shows and meetings with buyers. She seemed to have a new stallion every week, and every weekend she cried her eyes out to Spike about her most recent heartbreak over a bottle of wine. Dash wasn’t sure what was going on there, but Spike was taller than a pony now and looking pretty sleek, so that was between him and Rarity. “Sweetie Belle doesn’t have a chance with me. She isn’t half as cool as Scoot,” Dash said with a grin. “Rainbow, darling, if you like Scootaloo so much why don’t you try dating her properly? Love is blind, but it’s rather unseemly to use such a young mare for your own fun.” “Hey, it’s her fun too. Believe me,” Dash said with a smirk. “I bet Scootaloo would think that’s fun!” Pinkie said, leaning on the edge of the hot tub and grinning. Pinkie had moved out of Sugarcube Corner, and had her own little house in town where she ran Pinkie’s Parties and Promotion, a party planning business that put on all of the biggest events in Equestria. Over the top didn’t begin to describe the things Pinkie could do if anypony gave her a big budget and free reign. Any information about her love life was lost in a stream of plans, ideas, and random musings. There was no pony serious, Dash knew that. Serious and Pinkie Pie didn’t belong in the same sentence. “You know it!” Dash grinned, glad to have somepony agree with her. Pinkie turned her head sideways. “Of course, she would also think it’s fun to stare of a picture of you on the wall. Maybe you should just let her do that instead!” Dash blushed a little, thinking about that first time she’d gone to Scoot’s cloud house. “Heh, I’m pretty sure she thinks this is a lot more fun.” “Yeah, well jumpin’ off somethin’ real high up is fun, least till ya hit the ground.” “We both have wings,” Dash pointed out. Applejack rolled her eyes. “It’s one of them metaphors.” “Whatever.” Dash sighed and gave it one last shot. “Fluttershy? What do you think?” Fluttershy still lived in her cottage, tending to her animals, and seemed to have changed the least of all of them. But secretly Applejack kept Dash updated on the number of times a week Fluttershy or Big Macintosh made some excuse for going to see one another. This had been going on for years, and Applejack was to the point of locking them both in the apple cellar until they got on with it already. Fluttershy’s eyes went wide, as though she had sincerely hoped that Dash wouldn’t ask her that. “Well, um, since you asked... I just think – I hope Scootaloo doesn’t get her feelings hurt.” Dash sighed. From Fluttershy that was about the same as AJ threatening to tear her limb from limb. “Alright, that’s it. This is the end of the conversation about Rainbow Dash’s sex life.” “Hey, could ya make that for good?” Applejack said with a smirk. Twilight giggled. “It’s the only subject I know more about then I want to.” Rainbow Dash slumped back in her lounge, and hoped that maybe Scootaloo’s friends were more supportive. • • • “Of all of the crazy, stupid, mental, idiotic, insane, crazy –” “You said crazy already,” Scootaloo said, rolling her eyes. The three ex-Cutie Mark Crusaders were in the orchard at Sweet Apple Acres, waiting for Apple Bloom to finish her chores for the day. Scoot grabbed an apple out of a bushel and started munching it as Sweetie Belle went on. “Oh, it’s extra crazy! Of all of the crazy ideas you’ve had, Scootaloo, this is the worst. She’s ten years older then you, she’s a Wonderbolt, and you’ve been obsessed with her since before you had a cutie mark. So you’re just going to start sleeping with her, when you know she doesn’t love you, and you think it’s not going to hurt when she dumps you for somepony she actually likes?” “Yefsh,” Scoot said, mouth full of apple. “Argh! You’re crazy!” Ever since Sweetie Belle got her cutie mark first, a ribbon of musical notes she got performing a song for Princess Celestia when the other Crusaders got sick before the performance, she acted like she was the responsible grown-up of the group. She would always be one of Scootaloo’s best friends, so Scoot put up with a lot from her. But that didn’t mean she had to pay attention to it. “I think what Sweetie’s tryin’ to say is we just don’t wanna see ya get hurt,” Apple Bloom said, turning to buck another tree. Most of the work she did around the farm was keeping up the buildings and fences. Her cutie mark, a paint brush painting a red apple, was a symbol of her talent for keeping Sweet Apple Acres looking fresh and new. But it seemed that nopony who lived on the farm got out of applebucking. “I know,” Scoot said. “I’m not gonna get hurt. Look, I know Rainbow Dash is never gonna fall in love with me. I’m amazed she’d even want to have sex with me! But since she does, that’s pretty much the most awesome thing that’s happened in my life so far. It’s totally enough. And if she goes on to somepony else, I’ll know that for a little while she wanted me.” “You’re trying to tell us that you’re not in love with Rainbow Dash,” Sweetie Belle said flatly. “Are you kidding? I think that might make me the creepiest friend ever. I’m pretty sure you can’t be somepony’s biggest fan, and be sleeping with them, and be in love with them when they don’t love you without crossing the line into restraining order territory.” “So if ya ain’t in love with her, why’re you doin’ this again?” “Because she’s only one of the sexiest ponies in Equestria. Number 8, according to Pony magazine’s 50 Sexiest Ponies. I don’t care how old she is, if one of the sexiest ponies in the world wants to sleep with you, you don’t say no!” “Don’t ya care at all ‘bout findin’ somepony to really care about?” Apple Bloom pressed. Scoot shrugged. “That’s another thing that’s cool about this. If I find somepony, I don’t have to worry about telling Dash. She’ll be just as happy for me as you guys will.” Sweetie shot her a look. “Yeah. ‘There’s this cool, nice, normal pony who wants to date me, so I’ll stop sleeping with Rainbow Dash.’ Who thinks that sounds like something Scootaloo might say, ever?” Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Nopony!” Sweetie answered herself, eyes wide. “Nopony thinks you would say that, because you would never say that. As long as she’s stringing you along, you’re never going to try to find a normal relationship.” “I don’t see why you’re so worked up about this! She’ll probably get bored with me after she finishes training me for the Young Flyers Competition, anyway,” Scoot said with a half-hearted smile. “Ya know that, and you’re just okay with her usin’ you like that?” Apple Bloom asked as she joined them, finished her bucking for the day. “Yes! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you guys. This isn’t a relationship, it’s never going to be a relationship, and either of us can drop it if we want to, for any reason. And that’s just fine with me.” Apple Bloom shrugged and smiled a little. “Okay then, Scoot. If ya know all that, and it’s what ya want, I guess we oughta be happy for you.” Scoot looked to Sweetie, who rolled her eyes. “I’m happy that you’re crazy, too.” “Great! Wanna see the tricks we’ve been working on for the Young Flyers Competition?” “That isn’t a euphemism for something, is it?” Sweetie asked, raising an eyebrow. Scoot got up and stretched her wings. “A what-emism?” Sweetie Belle just giggled. “Never mind.” Later that night, alone in her cloud house, Scoot worked on her lesson plans. But mostly she thought about Rainbow Dash. It felt like in one weekend all of Scoot’s fantasies had come true. It was impossible, but it happened. And it might even happen again next weekend, if Dash didn’t meet somepony in Las Pegasus. The second a worry crept in, Scoot pushed it out of the way. If Dash did meet somepony, she had still made Scoot’s dream a reality. That dream always ended on the cloud where it started, Scoot really couldn’t ask for more. And if somehow it happened again next weekend, she could be just as happy, and just as cool with it if that was all. This was still just the fantasy, Scoot insisted to herself. Her and Rainbow Dash on the cloud. It was just way cooler because it happened to be real.