//------------------------------// // Who Watches Who? // Story: Tales of First Contact: Unity // by Banjo64 //------------------------------// David heard the familiar sound of the portal opening. He didn’t bother turning to look, though. He’d been expecting company today. He just got up and made his way to the kitchen as he heard the sound of hooves clopping on his floor. “Hey, Lyra,” he said. The green unicorn walked past him into the living room. She tossed her saddle bags aside and flopped down on his couch before speaking. “Ugh… what a day I’ve had. Hello, David. Got anything good in there?” asked Lyra. David checked the fridge. “Let’s see, Sunny D, beer, milk, OJ, some Sprite, and… ah crap. I’m out of Dr. Pepper,” he announced. Lyra rolled her eyes. “Oh ha ha. You’re always so funny, David. Now pass me my bucking soda,” said Lyra. Permitting himself a chuckle, David tossed her a can of Dr. Pepper before grabbing himself a Sprite. He couldn’t stand Dr. Pepper himself, but what kind of host would he be if he didn’t always have some for his roommate / houseguest / pet / partner in crime? After catching her soda, Lyra levitated a stack of snacks out of her bags. Humans made better drinks outside of cider season, but pony junk food put mankind’s to shame. “So, new season premier. Wonder if there's gonna be a new big bad this year,” said Lyra as she opened her can. “I dunno. You’re the one who actually watches the trailers. You know I try to avoid spoilers,” said David as he sat down next to her. “This might be entertainment for you, but I’m on the lookout for a future disasters that might strike. You know how the Princess gets when a new season comes out,” said Lyra. “Yeah. And who was it that told you it was a bad idea to let her in on this?” said David with a smirk. Lyra bashed his shoulder with a hoof. She was careful not to hit too hard, but it still stung. “Well excuse me if I thought my childhood friend would want to know about another dimension that has a video documentation about Equestria's future,” said Lyra. “Video documentation is a fancy way of saying we have a kid’s show that happens to match your plane of existence. And we both know this thing isn’t all that reliable,” said David. “Maybe, but you know what? The foreknowledge I’ve given her has gotten her out of more than a few jams,” said Lyra. “And into several that wouldn’t have happened otherwise. Remember the second parasprite incident?” countered David. Lyra sighed. “Yeah, OK. That one was totally my fault,” she admitted. “And don’t you forget that this is a two-way street. If every detail of Metal Apes was true, World War Five should still be going. You have to take everything you see with a grain of salt, and acknowledge that not everything you see will come to pass,” recited David. Lyra rolled her eyes. “Uh huh. And that bunker you built in your backyard had nothing to do with a certain science fiction series from Equestria, right?” she teased. “Nope. I’m just a paranoid guy with cash to burn and no faith in my government,” replied David as he sipped his soda. “Then you don’t care that the latest book mentions what’s going to happen to your new president?” said Lyra with a smirk. David would have spilt soda all over his carpet if Lyra hadn’t seen it coming and made a small magic barrier in time. “Another book came out?! When were you planning on telling me?!” he demanded. Lyra gave him a pleasant smile and levitated a book out of her saddlebag. “Two days ago, and today. Guess who’s on the front cover?” she asked as she passed it to him. David took the book in his arms. He glanced at the somewhat cartoony picture of the president before turning to the back. The summary wasn’t very encouraging. “Another civil war? What, the last three weren’t enough? I know the writers put us in far more wars than reality, but seriously? I swear, Lyra, it’s like our ‘creators’ are a bunch of warmongers or something. Are you sure it’s not griffons writing Metal Apes?” asked David as he set the book down. “Nope. Bright Flare, Moonwalk, and everypony else are one hundred percent ponies. Trust me, if it was griffons writing this, you would know. I’ve never met a griffon that isn’t a gorn fan, even if they're one of the nice ones,” said Lyra. “Gorn? Have you been browsing TV Tropes again? I didn’t buy you that computer just so you could be an internet junkie,” said David with a raised eyebrow. “You mean the computer I paid for with my own money? It wasn’t easy melting those bits down legally, you know,” said Lyra. “It wasn’t easy proving I legally acquired a genuine bar of gold, either. I may be well off, but that was just ridiculous,” countered David. Lyra rolled her eyes. “Whatever. You know you’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t give your good friend access to mankind’s greatest invention. “You’re my good friend? Well, gee, Lyra. I never knew you thought about me that way. But we probably shouldn’t. We don’t want Bon Bon getting jealous,” said David with a smirk. Lyra facehooved with a groan. “For the last time, David, me and Bon Bon are not an item. It’s not my fault the fandom is so obsessed with shipping. Do I have to remind you about what happened when I told Twilight about this?” asked Lyra. David shook his head with a chuckle. Noting the time, he grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. Up next, the season premiere of My Little Pony! “Hey, David?” asked Lyra. “Yeah, Lyra?” replied David. “Do you ever wonder if we should… you know… let the writers in on all this? I mean, we both agreed to keep it a secret, but would it be so bad to let a few humans and ponies in on it? See if we can makes things easier for both of our worlds?”” asked Lyra. David sighed. “Every single day, Lyra. Every single day. But everytime I do, I’m reminded of one little detail that convinces me that we shouldn’t,” he replied. “Which is?” asked Lyra. “That we really have no idea how any of this works. Maybe it’s one big coincidence. Maybe we really did create each other's world and can change things. Or maybe there’s some other factor in play here that if we were to spill the beans will doom both our worlds. We just don’t know, and I don’t feel like messing with what might destroy the fabric of reality,” explained David. Lyra sighed in reply. “Yeah. Twilight said the same thing. She doesn’t want to tell the Metal Apes writers either. She doesn’t even want to come visit you out of fear that something bad might happen if a Princess comes to Earth. I can understand she’s nervous, but it’s not like this would be the first time she visited a world full of humans,” said Lyra. “It’d be the first time she’d visited a world of humans who know about Equestria even if they don’t think it’s real,” replied David. “That’s true,” admitted Lyra. The two just sat there as a few last minute ads ran on the TV. “Hey, David?” asked Lyra. “Yeah, Lyra?” asked David. “Thanks for sticking with me through all these years. I know I get on your nerves all the time so… thank you,” said Lyra. “No problem, Lyra,” replied David.