P.B. and J.

by TheAmazingMe


P.B. and Dream

The study lit up in my regular golden shade before I corrected myself and returned to blue. The spell I'd stumbled on as a foal, the one that earned me my mark, sat waiting in my mind as if I'd left it lying on a table. A table in a dusty, rarely used workshop, for that matter. I barely had time to remember to focus on the book I wanted before I lost the strand of magic from my core.
 
"Your magical stamina is somewhat...lacking. Although, that's hardly surprising," Twilight Sparkle intoned with enough of her know-it-all attitude to leave a bitter taste in my mouth with her little side-comment. She seemed to catch on that she made a slip, because her ears pinned down for a moment. "Sorry. Old habits."
 
"Yeah, they die hard," I replied drily, with extra salty dryness on the last two words. "So let's move on. You're the bearer of the Element of Magic. You must know how to increase my magical stamina."
 
She nodded eagerly. Her horn lit, illuminating the library around us. The books seemed to come from nowhere out of the darkness. "Books on magical exercises. The more you do, the more you can do. Most unicorns can only use magic related to their special talents. But what is common to all unicorns is that if you don't use it often, your skill, strength, and stamina all diminish. Here's the first one. Now, I noticed that your magic changed colors. Mind explaining what you're doing?"
 
I sighed and rolled my eyes. "I changed the color of my magic when I was demoted from Crown Prince. It was important to keep up appearances and show that the demotion was just temporary until I could become an alicorn."
 
"Well, not to put too fine a point on it, but that's your problem. Changing the color of your magic for aesthetic purposes is wasteful. It actually requires more magical power to do so. Which is why your spellcraft is generally regarded as..." She lifted a hoof, circling it in the air as she searched for a diplomatic way to say what she wanted to.
 
I snorted. "Shoddy. Don't worry about hurting my precious feelings now, Princess Twilight. You're closer to achieving my goals than I will ever be."
 
"That's not..." she began to protest, but I waved a hoof.
 
"Water under the bridge, Your Royal Highness. Unicorns are usually only adept at the type of magic that their special talent requires. Your special talent is magic itself. If there's anyone around with whom I can swallow my pride and learn it would be you, oh Future Ruler."
 
She stamped a hoof. "I'm not..."
 
I shook my head and merely chuckled. It was a sound that was many things; merry was not one of them. "Not yet. Just give it some time. The sisters won't rule forever. And you've proven yourself capable enough when it comes to doing extraordinary feats of magic. Perhaps you will even rule beside Cadence. Love and Friendship taking over after Sun and Moon," I mused.
 
"Not for a good long while, I think." Twilight shook her head, stubborn in her refusal. "Now let's get back to the matter at hoof: your little stamina problem."
 
That was certainly more of a double-entendre than I ever expected from Saint Friendship. I rolled my eyes again, catching sight of the moon through the stained glass window. A sudden thought struck my head and I pressed my lips together tightly for a moment. Inhaling sharply, I looked up. "Luna!"
 
The dream-library and Twilight Sparkle faded out as the moon grew. Finally, it burst into brilliant white light and the princess of the moon stood before me, a decidedly unapologetic look on her face. "I hope you appreciate how difficult it is to join two dreams together over such great distances."
 
"I hope you appreciate my unwillingness to become one of Twilight Sparkle's students!" I replied, just as stubbornly refusing to back down.
 
She drew herself up, a slightly condescending look on her face. "You could stand to learn a few things yet, Blueblood. And it seemed like as good a time as any to begin addressing your problems."
 
"It is my decision when to address these problems, Aunt!" I replied. "And I don't care how petulant that makes me sound. Honestly, you're acting just like..." Luna's form wavered, as if the mare before me was just an illusion. "Celestia?"
 
The Luna-facade went away, leaving my Aunt Celestia standing in her place, albeit with Luna's cutie mark on her flank. "Well done, seeing through that illusion."
 
"Don't act like it was intentional. Your form wavered. You're not used to using dream-magic when casting spells," I replied, taking a closer look at Luna's mark on Celestia's side. "What in the world?"
 
Celestia sighed. "It...just. Well, every once in a while, Luna and I change jobs so that we can appreciate what the other sister does. The first time we did it was sort of...accidental. Starlight Glimmer..."
 
I held up a hoof. "So you decided to take on my problems in the dream world while you had the chance? I don't know if I should be flattered or just more angry."
 
Celestia cast her eyes upwards. "You can be both. Harmony knows you've had the ability to hold two conflicting emotions at the same time more than once."
 
I'd often wondered what Celestia used when she wanted to express something only a higher power would know. "Usually directed at you as well, yes."
 
"Luna suggested I try it. But using Twilight and then an illusion-Luna was my idea. I just wanted to be a part of helping you without you knowing it was me. You tend to get defensive about my involvement. Which is a valid concern, given our history," she admitted, sitting down on her bed.
 
Suddenly we were in her royal chambers. It was a place with which I was quite familiar, but it also carried with it the emotional baggage of numerous fights that I'd had and lost with my dear aunt. I'm sure her intent was merely to set herself at ease. I exerted a touch of control and sat down on Joe's bed, the dream room becoming a melding of her royal chambers and his room. She looked at my side of the room with a smile.
 
"Setting aside our history, Twilight would be a great resource for you to pull from. She is the bearer of the Element of Magic, after all," Celestia said.
 
I shook my head. "I'm not getting banished to Ponyville just so I can do a few exercises. Nope. If you want me to learn, you'll just have to teach me."

"Well, that could be arranged," Celestia said. She stood and headed over towards the melding points between her room and mine. She waited. For a moment, I was confused, then I realized she was extending that same metaphorical olive branch she'd tried to offer more than once before. It was still Celestia and my cynicism echoed through my head that this gesture was another empty promise, but for the life of me I couldn't put any belief into it if I wanted to.

Perhaps that was the most telling; I didn't want to hate Celestia anymore. While a shocking development on its own, I pondered whether that was enough. To her credit, Celestia didn't invade on my space or even look all that annoyed at my reluctance. She was waiting for me to make my move. Convinced as I was that there wasn't a sufficiently cynical reason for Celestia to go out of her way now of all times to include me, I shrugged and stood up.

"Really?" I asked, surprised. "You'd make time for me?"

Celestia smiled. "I've been trying to make time for you, Blueblood. Really. And with three other princesses, I can start easing my busy schedule. I've taken up knitting."

I snorted, temporarily forgetting my good graces. "Went right to a grandma hobby? Well, I guess retirement is creeping up on you," I said. My lips went into a teasing smirk before I widened my eyes, realizing I might have gone too far.

To my consternation, she genuinely laughed. Without warning, she wrapped a wing around me to draw me into a hug. I tensed before relaxing into it. I'd forgotten how nice the sound of her laughter could be. "Well, keep joking like that and I won't show you the blanket I've been working on. For now, don't spend too much more of Luna's money unless you have to and have fun! Show that stallion of yours a good time."

She waved as the dream faded into darkness. I sat up in my room in the Crystal Castle. Joe shifted over to compensate for my movement and remained asleep. There was supposed to be some type of fair and we wouldn't be expected for any state business until the end of the day. With a grin, I decided taking Celestia's advice on showing Joe a good time was something I'd enjoy. First the theme park, then lunch at a food stall in the market and finally...


"We've had a fairly relaxed day. It's good to be away from the bakery." Joe's words drifted through the cool night air. Crystal buildings really gave off the most uncanny of echoes sometimes. "I'm surprised you didn't want to stay at the theme park all day."

"Eh, a few rides and some corny music is enough to keep my inner colt happy," I insisted. "Besides, there's so much to see that isn't just some manufactured facsimile."

Glancing around at our impressive surroundings, Joe looked as if he agreed. We passed a block in companionable silence before he finally asked the question. "Where are we going?"

"I just want you to keep an open mind about it, okay?" I started, already anticipating the kind of response I was likely to get. Given that I'd kept him in the dark, I wouldn't be surprised if he got a little snippy. But I might have been projecting my own behaviors on him.

Joe shrugged. "When have I ever not had an open mind?"

I tapped my chin. "Well, you have a point. But there are some things from my old life that I still enjoy that might...rub you the wrong way. And we haven't spoken about some of the more sensitive subjects yet. Granted, our relationship is between new and...less-than-new..."

Joe held up a hoof. "We're off on a tangent, dear. Where are we going that would remind you of your old life?"

Looking at our destination, I smirked and pointed. "We're here."

"To be honest, this really does live up to your old moniker." Joe glanced around the industrial-themed nightclub with a certain amount of trepidation. We journeyed inside of the club, easily getting through security in spite of the line. That was always a perk of being royalty. I'd have to remember to try and expose Luna to some of this before Celestia got a hold of her.

My smirk widened, content to let the feeling of the music pulse through me. It took a little digging to figure out where the crystal ponies went to play, but even a converted warehouse in the gem-cutting district made for a great rave spot. "Ponies misunderstand what it means to truly seek out pleasure. One might even consider it a return to the primal needs of any pony. Eating. Drinking. Sex. This was the world I lived in before I met you, dear. This is a side of me that you should know."

Joe quirked an eyebrow at me. "Not my kind of scene, but I can appreciate the appeal. Especially for a disgraced princeling with an attitude problem."

I laughed. "Well, you are quite the charmer, Joe. A regular silver-tongued devil."

"I suppose you want to go join the pulsating mass of ponydom out on that dance floor?" Joe gestured out towards the area in question with a hoof.

I shrugged, eyeballing the bar area. I'd have to be careful no matter which way we went. "Normally, I'd have said yes. But now..."

A white pony with violet eyes and neon-blue mane appeared out of nowhere at my side. "Well, if it isn't the Crown Prince of Pleasure."

I smiled, trying my best to look harmless as I sidled against Joe. "Oh! Vinyl, what a pleasant surprise."

"Pleasant would be if you watched your liquor and didn't cause a scene. But maybe you've settled down now? The papers have been running your little romance story all over the place. Life Story is promising quite a scoop and has even done a bit of research on your probation, fall from Celestia's court, and charity work with a certain sweet-toothed baker." Vinyl paused to turn to the pony in question. "Pony Joe, good to see you again. Hope you haven't bitten off more than you can chew."

"Vinyl, that is probably the longest I've ever heard you talk. Ever," Joe commented drily.

"Well, a romance between the best baker in Canterlot and the Prince of Pleasure is sure to make anypony talk more than normal." Vinyl shrugged, tipping her glasses down to reveal her eyes. "Especially given the divide between experience. If I may be so bold."

"You could stand to be a little less bold, Vinyl." My tone was a touch sharper than intended.

"That's a first from you, Princey. But hey, I can respect that you're trying to be a better pony. Celestia knows I've made enough mistakes for any one pony." She turned to gesture grandly towards the dance floor. "Why don't you two hit the dance floor and give these ponies something to talk about?"

"That sounds like fun," Pony Joe said as he stepped up.

"It-it does?" I asked as he turned to give me a look. The eyes said it all. Whatever inhibitions that Joe'd had, something in the conversation with Vinyl made him pony up and challenge me. "Well, if it's fine with you."

I strode forward with Joe and we entered the fray with gusto. As our hooves hit the floor, a voice started belting out a swinging tune, backed up by jazzy accompaniment and synth smashes. The music truly fused new and old school ways of getting down. Extending a hoof to Joe, we started swing dancing like there was no tomorrow.

Our dancing soon caught attention from those around us and we were suddenly in the middle of a cleared circle. We swung, spun, and came back together with fancy hoofwork and unmistakable passion. Joe actually pulled me into a trio of lifts as the music started to really hit a peak. By the end, we were both sweaty, breathing hard, and completely entranced by each other. Joe held me gently in a dip as the horns blared one last time. There was silence for a second, which was quickly enveloped by loud cheering from the others on the dance floor. Joe pulled me back up as he smiled. Looking around, he shook his head and waved at the attention we were receiving.

At a corner booth, we were joined by Vinyl and a few other performers and the club's manager. Drinks were flowing, but Joe kept me from overindulging, making sure we had plenty of water at the table. After a few drinks, I realized quickly just how many glasses of water I'd had. A familiar pressure was building and I nudged Joe to ask the manager about the little colt's room.

Joe joined me, or course, and we both made it to the bathroom where we relieved ourselves like racers. As we washed up, Joe bumped my hip with his and chuckled. "You know, this is the most fun I've had in a while. Even with Vinyl bringing up old memories. I guess we've both got our own history."

"Wait, you and Vinyl?" I started to ask, before he shushed me.

I bumped him back, but with a bit more force than he did. He caught his balance, but his chuckling intensified. "Well," I said as I pulled him in closely for a kiss, "the night's not over yet." His eyebrow lifted up in appraisal before I went in for the touch of his lips on mine. For a moment, we forgot ourselves until another stallion entered to use the facilities. Thankfully, he seemed intent only on achieving his goal. As we left, I had a word with one of the servers to look in on the poor guy. I'd passed out in enough bathrooms to know the signs.

We made our goodbyes not long afterwards and headed out into the night. As eye-blinding as the Crystal City was during the daytime, it was even more eye-catching at night. Canterlot City was a sea of glittering stars spread across the land, but the Crystal Empire was alive with light. Every surface gleamed, the colors seamlessly melding into something grander than the sum of its parts. From my view at the Crystal Palace it was amazing. From the ground level, amidst the hustle and bustle, it was surreal.

"You look exceptionally good tonight, Blueby." Joe's announcement came out of nowhere and promptly interrupted my musings.

"What? Don't I look exceptional most of the time?" I asked in mock offense.

Joe's wicked stare held me for a moment before he snorted. "You look exceptionally exceptional. The only exception to this exceptionally exceptional occasion would be the exceptional times that we've shared in my bed."

I grinned. This cinnamon-scented pony sure knew when to give me the bedroom eyes. "Your exceptional bed."

"Too bad tonight that bed is in Canterlot," He said, feigning disappointment. His eyes gleamed in eagerness that I would have to be quite naive to miss.

Patting him on the shoulder, I turned to head back to the Crystal Palace. "I think tonight we can make an exception."