Resistance Is Futile

by OutOfTheBlue


Chapter 2

I came to in some sort of cell. Judging by the lack of light coming in the small window, it was nighttime. I groggily sat up and started taking in my surroundings. I was sitting on a bed composed of a wooden board chained to the wall medieval style with a thin mattress on it, there was a sink with a small mirror, a toilet with a small privacy curtain (which was very good because I had been afraid I would have to crap in the open.) and the small, bared window. The door was one of those old-timey iron bars with a door built in things, once again like some sort of medieval dungeon. My observations were stopped when I noticed my guard.

The other ponies I had seen were unusual, being cartoony or unicorns or whatever, but this one was different. It had charcoal grey fur under its purple armor, and a dark violet mane and tale of about medium length. What really was different were its eyes, which were large, golden cat eyes, and the fact it had batwings. To complete the image were two small fangs protruding slightly from its mouth, and little tufts on the tips of its ears. There was only one way to describe it, adorable. The other ponies I had seen (which was only, like, four.) had been kinda cute with the big eyes and fluffy coats and stuff, but this one was downright adorable. It must have noticed me looking at it because it scowled and said,

"What are you looking at?"

Its voice sounded female, like the doctor, and she was very obviously trying to sound tough. I managed to hold in a "daw" and replied,

"Just taking in my surroundings. My name's Jack, what's yours... by the way, can I have my shirt back?"

I might be their prisoner, but I could still be nice. Also these ponies were too cute to hate. And as for the shirt, it was a little chilly in the cell and I still was only in my trousers, shirtless. She narrowed her eyes slightly and tilted her head to the side. I think my heart stopped for a few seconds at how cute it was.

"Shirt? Whatever. Just sit down and shut it. I don't feel like dealing with... whatever in Tartarus you are."

Ouch, that was cold. I mean, sure I'm not Mr. Charisma but at least being polite would have been nice. It's always the cute ones that hurt you the most. I grunted before getting off the rather uncomfortable bed and stretching. I decided to sit on the floor rather than the bed because, just like everything else in this cell, it was pony sized. The bed was at about half-thigh hight and when I sat on it my knees were level with my chest. Needless to say the floor was better. As I got as comfortable I could on cold stone I let my mind wander. I often enjoyed just zoning out and thinking about random bits of this and that, but as I was thinking, it all sunk in. No matter what I did, I was dead.

If the ponies realized I didn't have anything important to tell them, they'd dispose of me. If they traded me to the Union, they'd kill me as an example. If I held out until the Union leveled the city, I would die. Death was inevitable, I was up a creek without a paddle. Except the creek is actually lava and I'm bodyboarding in it. I slumped over and proceeded to have a mental breakdown. I was dead, I literally was just living on borrowed time. I didn't want any of this. I just wanted to be a normal guy with a normal life who did normal boring stuff. Not go to some weird world of talking unicorns and cute bat pony hybrids. Who even cared! I didn't! I might as well just spiral into crippling depression now rather than wait until I'm being executed by technicolored dream horses.

"Uh, are you like, having a seizure or something?"

I didn't even look up. I really didn't feel like being nagged by a bat horse.

"Oh Celestia, now I feel bad. Um... want to... talk... about it?"

I laughed that sort of laugh that tells you "that person has more than a couple screws loose." I might as well tell her, I'm gonna die anyway.

"Of course I'm alright! I'm just going to die. No problem! I've always wanted to die at the ha-- I mean hooves of a bunch of talking, pastel colored, ponies! Why wouldn't I be ECSTATIC!"

The bat pony walked a bit closer before saying,

"D-die!? Are you sick? Do I need to get a doctor!"

Aw, now she liked me. It only took a mental breakdown.... Sheesh, struggling to accept my inevitable death makes me huge jerk.

"Nope! I'm fit as a fiddle! Until you ponies knock me off that is."

Her jaw dropped... no, like literally. Her jaw... hit the floor... I obviously am in hell.

"Wh-why would we kill you? That's horrible!"

"What else would you do with me when you're done?"

"Let you go? Give you back? Something!"

"And then THEY'D kill me. I loose either way!"

I just sat there, trying to keep it together. My life might be falling apart but I could still face my end with dignity. Something soft touched my hand, and I looked over to see the adorable bat pony resting her hoof on top of my hand. She had removed her hoof... boots? Or hoof guards? Whatever. What really surprised me was that her hoof was soft, like a marshmallow. I mean, I could feel rigid bone and stuff in it, bit it had a soft bottom or something. She patted my hand gently and gave me a weak smile.

"Don't worry, Princess Celestia is a really good and kind ruler. She wouldn't hurt you unless she absolutely had to. How about this, let's start over. My name is Orchid, it's nice to meet you Jack."

She smiled before getting back to her post. I was glad that she would at least talk to me now. Being locked in my cell with nothing to do would be super boring. Now I could talk to my new bat pony frien-emy.

We talked about this and that, ranging from what we liked doing to random things about eachother. I explained what a shirt was, and then I learned that she was literally called a batpony. Also they are not vampires but many ponies still believe they are. All in all, I was kinda sad when she got replaced by, get this, a pegasus. He was a guy, didn't talk much, and wasn't nearly as cute as Orchid. After a while I was lead to a small room.

I was seated in a too short chair at a short table. I would have tried to run, but I really didn't feel like having my ankles broken. I sat patiently for a while, but eventually I got bored. I was halfway through a cover of "This Is Gospel" when the door opened. Unfortunately, I didn't notice the massive white alicorn (Orchid taught me that. See, I know stuff.) So as she sat down I had just turned, eyes closed and sang,

"If you love me let me GOOOOOOOOOO."

My eyes snapped open when I heard quiet laughter.

"A most interesting proposition, but unfortunately I can't let you go just yet."

I froze. I never sing in front of people. And now I had just sang rather badly in front of the princess of the nation I was a captive of. With a heavy blush I sat back down.

"Now then, let's talk."