//------------------------------// // Spear & Rainbow of Justice // Story: The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody) // by TundraStanza //------------------------------// Advisory: Please set "Formatting" to "Dark" before continuing to read. Thank you. They're ready to rumble and throw the first punch. The heroes will rise and suplex the baddies. Properties in this chapter belong to Hasbro, ScrewAttack, and Toby Fox. --- The Moment No Pony was Waiting For Season the Sixth Overwhelming power surges through them. Fight for what's right and all that. The Action Girl takes the extreme opposite stance of a damsel in distress. She seeks action, danger, and isn't afraid to kick some tail. Like Undyne, the hero of the underground monsters. And Rainbow Dash, a hero among Equestria's ponies. He's W and I'm B. And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~Death Battle~~~ Undyne -Captain of the monsters' Royal Guard -Anthropomorphic fish -Suplexes boulders just because she can -Weapon of choice: magical spears -Determination gives her a life beyond her standard HP -The Undying: Her form during her last stand -Tends to throw a "shield" spear to her opponent before she goes on the offensive Trapped underground along with the rest of monster-kind, Undyne didn't get to see much of the surface-dwelling humans and their way of life. The most exposure she got was the anime shows and comics that Dr. Alphys claimed were her "scientific research". Come on, even I know that's bull-spit. My gun-blade is way bigger than whatever the heck kind of skyscraper Undyne is bragging about. *Ahem* One of the reasons Undyne started learning the ways of combat was because she wanted to beat King Asgore. During her first time against him, it didn't go too well for her. Being the soft-hearted creature that he was, Asgore offered to train Undyne until she got stronger. She accepted, and several rounds later, she finally managed to knock him onto his back. And he just laughed it off. Man, what are goat-dads made of anyway? In passing, Asgore mentioned a few words that made it sound like he blamed humans for the death of his son Asriel. Fueled by determination and a sense of vengeance, Undyne swore she would help Asgore find and kill any humans they came across. During her time serving as the king's royal guard, her strength and her heroism became legendary among the monsters. What probably helped her reputation was the dark suit of armor she wears and the giant, flipping spears she throws just about everywhere! These spears are magic in nature and there doesn't seem to be any given limit to how many Undyne can conjure or levitate at once. Though, she prefers to use a dozen or less during any standard attack. These spears don't just hurt the body. They can pierce through your soul if you don't move the *eff* out of the way! Despite her ruthless and aggressive approach of throwing spears in the general direction of any human she encounters, she carries her own sense of honor. At the beginning of an ordinary battle, she'll forcefully shove a green-magical spear into the possession of her opponent. This particular spear can act as a shield to protect the wielder from incoming projectiles that she throws at them. When she gets tired of that, she can make the shield-like spear vanish just by flipping her own spear around. What's also kind of strange is how she takes time during the fight to suplex giant boulders, just because she can. Why doesn't she ever throw giant rocks at her enemies? For that matter, why does she always stay in one spot whenever more dangerous opponents reach out and attack her? On a regular basis, she teaches an eager skeleton would-be guard some cooking lessons. Though, it's a wonder how her destructive approach to the vegetables, spaghetti noodles, and stove haven't led to more house fires. It's pretty lucky that it hasn't, considering her weakness to extremely hot and dry environments. Plus, she never did quite figure out on her own that Alphys was completely lying about anime's legitimacy or lack thereof. But underestimate Undyne at your own peril. Even if you somehow manage to bring her Hope down to nothing, she has a little secret that only the absolutely heartless ever lay eyes on. Her final form: Undyne the Undying! Even though monster bodies usually fade into dust mere seconds after they die, Undyne's is a little different. Somehow, her determination reconstructs her body into a fiercer, scarier, and faster attacker than before. While she still gives her opponent a shield-spear every now and again, her comfortable dozen spears can suddenly become as many as five dozen all flying for the enemy's soul at once. Not to mention the number of spears that fly in from the opposite direction of where you think they're coming from. Ah, yes. Undyne's yellow spears are tricky little devils that fly in from one direction but can quickly dart around the enemy to hit from the other side. A leftward spear hits from the right, a downward spear stings upward, and so forth. And look at that eye! What keeps shooting out of it? Laser? Magic? A freaky light show just for effect? Nobody knows for sure, but we do know one thing. Undyne won't give up until all of the monsters are free. "Just what are humans made of anyway?!" ~~~Death Battle~~~ Rainbow Dash -One of the Wonderbolts' newest members -Pegasus pony -Pulls pranks to the nth degree -Super fast flier and manipulator of weather -Can get right back up after smashing through trees and rocks -Sonic Rainboom: Ultimate display of breaking sound barriers, the visible light spectrum, and demolition -Overconfidence has led to downfalls Born and raised in Cloudsdale, Rainbow Dash has always had a dream to be the best flier in Equestria. Her can-do attitude has inspired many around her and helped shy individuals come out of their emotional shells, if only a little. When she dropped out of Flight School, she moved to Ponyville and joined the weather team. As a pegasus pony, Dash can manipulate the weather in all kinds of crazy ways. She can literally kick rain and lightning bolts out of clouds, spin around really fast to create tornadoes, and even punch a cloud out of existence. She's strong enough to match earth ponies in strength and is fast enough to outpace sound several times over. Her fastest pace happens when she uses her signature move: the Sonic Rainboom. Once triggered, she can fly as fast as Mach 10 and somehow shatter the visible light spectrum in several directions. The boom itself can shake mountains and shatter giant rocks. Now that's breaking news! Rainbow has endurance far greater than any real-life pony. She can smash her head through trees, bushes, and even rocks and get right back up into the air. Combining her speed with a karate kick somehow activates Minecraft-like physics, allowing her to knock wood from a tree trunk without disturbing the rest of the tree ("Sleepless in Ponyville"). Rainbow's big dream was to fly alongside her idols, the Wonderbolts. They're a flying team kind of like the Blue Angels. And after a few years of training, academy regiments, a history exam, and a certain Wonderbolt retiring to teaching, she finally achieved this dream. While I personally find nothing wrong with acting like the cream of the crop, Dash often got in trouble for not acting as part of the team. One such stunt left her crashing so spectacularly that it splashed cotton candy everywhere. When she isn't busy with Wonderbolts' work, Rainbow can often be found reading a book in the Daring Do series or pulling off pranks that make Pinkie Pie proud. She also apparently made friends with Discord during a long weekend that Twilight Sparkle, along with the rest of the audience, missed. How did she go from this: Rainbow barely escapes a blue Discord's hug. "I'm out of here!" She flies away. ... to this? While standing next to Discord and waving, Rainbow says, "Hi, Twilight! Hi, Spike!" We may never know, B. What we do know is that Rainbow's moments of loyalty stand out when they count, whether it's for Cloudsdale, Ponyville, Princess Celestia, or any of her friends. Then there's the hidden egg-head side of this cool, blue flying horse. Aside from her encyclopedic knowledge about everything and anything Daring Do related, she also has an uncanny ability to absorb information via multi-tasking while flying ("Testing... 1, 2, 3"). Maybe she isn't so much of an athlete after all. *Rainbow Dash chuckles nervously.* "Okay, let's not get carried away." ~~~Death Battle~~~ Alright, the combatants are set. Let's settle this debate once and for all. It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~Death Battle~~~ A lone pegasus pony is napping atop a cloud. The snoring that comes out of her muzzle sounds kind of like muffled neighs. A few birds tweet and chirp while flying by the pony's resting place. She blinks her eyes slowly and lifts her head to yawn. She looks around and down at the ground. Something clambers down below. The pegasus grunts as a question mark appears over her head. The mark dissipates almost immediately. An armored figure that walks on two legs is making the disturbing racket with each step on the ground. Despite there being no surface for it to echo off, it sounds like heavy steps in a marble-tiled hallway. It would be impressive if it wasn't so annoying. The figure stops walking for a moment and looks around itself. An armored hand reaches up and pulls off the helmet. The head underneath looks dark blue with red hair flowing back like a ponytail. There are frills on either side of the head. One eye looks like a black dot against a yellow iris. The other eye is covered in a black patch. This scaled creature pulls out a bottle from within her possession. She cracks it open and splashes the water all over some gills on either side of her head. At this motion, the watching pegasus gasps quietly. She recalls seeing something like this creature before. It was in a book that her friend had showed her group before adventuring to another world. "Siren!" The pegasus calls, punching through her cloud and racing down toward the fish-like monster. "Huh? Shyren? Where?" The anthro fish looks around before spotting the shadow of something approaching. The pegasus hovers about ten feet away. "So, you're back from that Canterlot High world to try and wreak havoc in Equestria? Not while I have anything to say about it!" "What the hell are you on about?!" The fish monster looks at the pony like she's crazy. She conjures a blue spear and spins it around in her hand. "You trying to pick a fight with me?" "I'll vanquish you before you get the chance to sing!" The pegasus punches her front hooves together. "FIGHT!" Undyne flips her spear around. In doing so, a straight line of green light appears and forces itself in the hold of Rainbow Dash's teeth. Dash grunts in confusion, trying to shake her head free of the obstruction. Yet it seems pretty stuck at this time. "You're green now, punk!" Upon this declaration, Undyne conjures three blue-highlighted spears and throws them straight ahead. Rainbow tries to fly out of the way, but only succeeds in spinning herself around. She braces for the impact with the spears coming at her face. The green spear in her mouth shines three times, practically dissolving the incoming attacks. Dash raises her brow. The anthro fish finds a nearby boulder and suplexes it, just because she can. The pegasus uses this distraction to dive in and make a few passes against the warrior's spine. There are a few grunts of pain from the impact, yet this seems to make the fish lady smirk. "Ngyah! Maybe this won't be so boring after all!" Undyne conjures a few different spears from different directions. Rainbow's eyes dart around at the sudden whooshing noises. She turns to face the incoming spears. Her impromptu shield blocks two in front of herself, three to her right, two behind her, four to her left, and one last one in front. After the last small spear dissolves against the defense, Undyne flips her own personal spear around. The shield spear vanishes and Rainbow's mouth is free. "What the-?" Dash's eyes glance around at the ground. A dozen blue scattered dots are on the ground that weren't there before. These dots erupt into magical spears that quickly rise up out of the ground. The pegasus yelps and flies around, narrowly dodging each of the pointy weapons heading her way. After that little distraction, Rainbow sets her sights on the crazy siren. She flies around in rapid circles, creating a huge tornado that spins the enemy around and around. While the fish is spinning, Dash speeds around for some more quick kicks and punts against various points of the armor and the exposed scales. Then, she delivers a finishing karate kick, sending the fish flying into the ground. Undyne finds herself impacting the ground so hard that she spits up. It's difficult to tell if that's blood or bile coming out of her mouth. Either way, it isn't pretty as her vision starts shaking from all the rapid hits. Her good eye threatens to close itself due to the shakes. Rainbow crosses her hooves, turns around, and slowly flies away. ... "No." A singular word catches Rainbow Dash's attention. She turns around while hovering in place. She looks at the glowing white visage in confusion. Somehow, Undyne holds onto her spear even tighter than before. "I reject this reality... and substitute my own! Ngaaaah!" The glow becomes even brighter than before. Rainbow covers her eyes with a hoof. When she manages to look again, she gasps. Her eyes go wide. The creature that was Undyne is no more. In its place, sharper, sleeker, and darker armor is adorned with valentines at the wrists and on the breastplate. A glowing yellow twinkle is all that shows against a black eye. A spear is pointed upward. "You're going to have to try a little harder than that!" The wind howls loudly across this battlefield. It carries the scent of determined fish. Rainbow stares at The Undying... and The Undying stares back. She flips her spear around, conjuring a new green 'shield' spear in Rainbow's mouth. Dash lifts her brow, wondering why this same trick is being used again. The Undying summons a few magical spears to attack from the front. Rainbow takes a quick look around... and notices that there are significantly more than twelve spears coming her way. Her eyes go wide. She does her best to spin around in the direction of the incoming spears. All of a sudden, a couple yellow ones disappear from where she was sure they were going... only to jab her in the back a couple times. Luckily for Dash, the spears are magic in nature and quickly fade from their point of impact. However, the pain remains. The green spear gets stripped from her mouth and vanishes. Several spears surround and fly toward her current position. She flies down and around, clusters always colliding at epicenters and then scattering outward. Rainbow flies around in several loops, trying to confuse her attacker. The Undying summons several from the ground and the sky to chase after her foe. A few of them narrowly slide past and pinch a few hairs off Rainbow's tail. She grits her teeth and flies down, gaining speed. She turns at a right angle, unleashing an exploding ring of colors. The Undying slides back due to the Sonic Rainboom's force. She twirls the spear in her gloved hand, conjuring the shield-spear in her opponent's mouth again. Raising her other hand, she summons several yellow spears that fly toward the pony. Thinking quickly, Rainbow positions herself to face the opposite direction of where each of the yellow spears originate. The green magic does its thing and dissolves the tricky spears. Rainbow spins herself around at her fastest speed, and manages to release the green spear from her mouth. She immediately kicks a nearby storm cloud with much force. The cloud unleashes a large lightning bolt that supercharges the green spear. The Undying holds up her own spear to defend, but the projectile has already reached her. The electricity spreads all over the armor and through the body, showing the audience a brief image of her skeleton under her scales and skin. ... Both spears fall to the ground and the green one vanishes. "I don't believe it. Even all this... wasn't enough?" Dash flutters to the ground slowly. She sets all four hooves down. She's panting and sweating. "I... think I caught a glimpse of it..." Cracks form in random places along Undyne's armor. "In your eyes... those are the eyes of someone... who fights for their friends..." The pegasus has no words to spit between breaths. Instead, she nods her head. Undyne smiles as if nothing is wrong. "Let's meet again... in the next life." Rainbow takes a seat right there. "Y-Yeah... I'll be waiting." Undyne chuckles and closes her eye. "Punk." The guard's body fades into dust on the wind. Her armor crumbles to the ground in a heap of pieces and debris. K.O.! ~~~Death Battle~~~ I'm no fish-frying expert, but that looks a little overdone. At first, this seemed like a very close match. Both Rainbow Dash and Undyne can dish out the pain as well as take it. However, there are some advantages that push the battle in Rainbow's favor. While she's no Flash or Quicksilver, Rainbow Dash can consistently fly faster than sound itself. Meanwhile, Undyne's general travel speed is nowhere near that pace, especially when properly armored for combat. While her spears may easily overtake the dodging speed of your average human soul, they don't break as many sound barriers as Rainbow's casual flight speed. And Undyne just stands there when she takes the pain! Sure, she can laugh off the first few hits, but that doesn't change the fact that it's damage. You'd think she'd keep at least one of her shield-spears for herself, not freely give her enemy a handicap. Plus, Rainbow Dash's reaction time and reflexes are much greater during flight, as she processes what she sees in the sky and on the ground subconsciously. Undyne's hints of where the ground-bound spears are coming from would just make it easier for Rainbow Dash to anticipate something wrong with more than enough time to get out of the way. That armor's not doing any favors against weather-based attacks either. If it can conduct the heat from nearby lava and cook her to the point of knocking her out, there is no way it's going to keep her safe from lightning strikes. Against an aggressive foe like Rainbow, Undyne could potentially push her internal Determination far enough to transform into her Undying form, but even that's not quite enough to match Rainbow's speed. In fact, she's taking even more damage from every hit in her Undying form than she does in her default. I think Undyne got the point. She just needs to dust herself off. The winner is Rainbow Dash. ~~~Death Battle~~~ --- "Ha ha, yeah!" The real Rainbow Dash pumps her hoof. "I kick tail!" "Ngaaah." Undyne crosses her arms. She's wearing a plain black tank-top and blue jeans. "So your simulated self can beat me in a fight to the death. But there's one thing you'll never beat me at." "Oh yeah?" Rainbow raises her brow. "And what would that be?" Undyne smirks. "Cooking." Aw, horseapples. Does she know I'm a bad cook? Dash shakes her head out of negative thoughts. "Yeah right! I could totally win in a cooking contest! Any food, any way." "Oh really, punk?" (I swear the air around her looks like it's on fire.) "Then let's go see if you can put your pans where your mouth is!" "Bring it on, fish lady!" They run over to Sugarcube Corner to begin their cooking contest. Faust help us all.