Have you ever had that moment when you wake up in the morning and instead of waking up to see a beautiful morning and feeling absolutely refreshed you instead feel like someone just ran your happy ass over with a truck and came back to finish the job only to botch it completely?
Well, that is how I feel right now and I must say I did not miss this feeling at all.
I woke up to stare at the ceiling of my private chambers, my eyes seeing nothing but an off-white surface as the weight on my chest and right leg as I only had to cast my gaze downward to see Forge resting her head underneath my chin as her horn was rubbing against the side of my head. She was sleeping rather soundly for a mare who rode me so hard that I can't even feel my pelvis let alone the surrounding area is just as bruised or worse.
Thinking on it now I can say that Forge is clearly on her estrus cycle and that she will be like this for the entire week, which means that I should be expecting this to repeat for the next six days or until I finally decide to get her pregnant. Something that I know that is straight up impossible for numerous reasons, but the main one is being that we are two completely different species.
Genetics doesn't work like that so the odds of me an alien who was once a human being who now has an unknown genetic structure putting a bun in Forge's oven is pretty much never going to happen and even with an intervention from a god, still doubt it would even happen. Unless of course Discord somehow is still alive and decides to fuck me over by making me shoot live rounds instead of duds.
But that hasn't stopped Forge from trying or even stopping. Hell it even encourages her to try even harder to get pregnant and I have seen her take tonics made by her people, fertility spells by some of the ponies in the palace's infirmary, hell she even tried asking the spirit of the forest for a means of getting what she wanted.
I don't even want to know if she made a deal with her or not but all I do know is that at the rate she rides me I am going to be winding up in the hospital with a shattered pelvis, broken back, and possibly a destroyed penis.
Death by Snu-Snu, that will not be on my tombstone if I can help it but man what a way to go!
Moving my left arm to the edge of my bed I grab a firm hold on it and ever so slowly dragged my weak and battered form to the side, all the while gently picking my wife's body off of my own and placed her back down onto the bed as to not wake her up. Grabbing her gently by the neck I lifted it up before moving that was soon followed by grabbing her foreleg and chest, working my way downward in a slow, methodical fashion until finally I was free from her clinging grasp and as soon as I was free I did what any normal person would do in the morning.
Take a shower to get the stink and evidence off before going out to greet the masses and to usher in the beginning of the Crystal Fair.
As I crawled out of bed by sliding out of it and landing onto the floor I quietly stepped through my room, stepping around the armor that lay on the floor in haphazard piles along with my weapons laying on the floor. I nearly blasted my foot off as I accidentally kicked my Shock Pistol, making it charge up a shot but because the trigger wasn't squeezed it simply hummed to life and stayed off.
For the moment anyway, for all I know it is just waiting for me to take a few steps in front of the barrel before finally discharging and blowing a neat hole in the back of my foot or leg and forcing me to use a crutch or a wheelchair for the remainder festival.
But luckily for me, that wasn't the case, it eventually turned itself off after the charging sequence faded due to not being fired at the moment of charging. With that danger out of the way I immediately went to the bathroom as fast as I could but due to me being in a state of a bruised pelvis and partially drained of bodily fluids, I am in a bit of a trouble.
That situation was rectified when I took a shower, I got rid most if not all of the smell of sex from my body when I used the harsh yet powerful body wash that the medical staff uses on wounded ponies when they are unable to properly clean themselves off. And as for my lack of liquids in my body, standing under the shower head with my mouth wide open to trick all the water that was coming from the spout and although the water tasted bleh, I still managed to rehydrate myself in the process.
Stepping out of the shower and patting myself down with the heavy towel that was made especially for me I then left the bathroom and put on my second skin that I wear underneath my armor before putting on the heavy metal plating. I looked at my cloak that I usually wore when on duty or when I was traveling deep in the wilds but on this day I decided against it because I didn't want it to get dirty during the festival along with it getting damaged from the events that will be taking place.
With my attire donned and my body now less aching than it was a few minutes ago I exited my room, leaving a snoring and thoroughly satisfied wife behind I shut the door behind me and made my way towards the dining hall to get some food in me.
When I closed the door to my room I turned around and saw that across from me was two ponies were also exiting their room and they were just like me...well, one of them was just like me.
Shining Armor, he looked just as drained and tired as I do with the exception that he looks like he is suffering from lower back pain. His wife, on the other hand, Cadance, she looks all sunshine and rainbows, a wide smile on her muzzle, eyes shut and she was skipping down the hall with glee clearly radiating from her body.
The equestrian royal guard captain and I shared a look that spoke volumes and we were silent before we both gave a shaky nod as we went on our way.
"Long night?"
"Yup...you?"
"Yeah..."
"Can't feel your back?"
"You have no idea little pony...at this rate I think my spine will snap in half before I die."
"Hehehe, I think we need a break from them."
"You and I know that we can't get away from them."
"I know."
"We are so boned...aren't we?"
"Yup."
"Come on Shining! We don't want to be late for breakfast!" The pink alicorn shouted at us as the two of us just groaned in lower back pain as we shuffled our way towards the dining hall.
Which of us will break first, the captain of the guard who married an alicorn, or me?
Probably me...
Shit...
All was quiet in the dining hall as the two lovebirds and I were the only ones to be in here this early in the day, everyone else was either still asleep or they were busy getting themselves ready to greet the day.
Normally I would still be asleep at this early hour but when I gained the position of Warden of the Wilds and now Emperor of the Crystal Empire, I have to wake up at the ungodly hour of five in the mourning because at eight o'clock that is when practitioners start showing up asking for requests, assistance in their trivial matters, things that can be easily solved amongst themselves but they want to seek the highest authority in the land to settle their disputes...
Well, that is the thing that Celestia and Luna usually had to deal with when they were in charge but the moment I took charge I began to implement my own infrastructure to the court system.
Now my duties as the crown are much simpler and easier, only the highest cases will reach my ears such as murder, corruption, and matters that concern the entire nation such as laws, regulations, and trade.
But at the moment I was busy sitting in my specially designed and crafted chair as I waited at one end of the table for our food to be served and as I sat there in peace, quietly staring at the ceiling as I breathed through my respirator, the ventilation units built into the sides of it making soft clicking sounds as I inhale and exhale. The two lovebirds sitting on the other side of me are talking about something that I currently could care less about but as I continued to stare at the ceiling I started to grow bored and decided to eavesdrop on the conversation.
What they were saying was...boring.
As it turns out they were on their honeymoon after getting married recently but they had to cut it short because we returned back to the world of the living. I can only speculate this but it would seem that one of them, if not both are not entirely happy with having their private time alone for a few weeks, was rudely cut short.
With them talking about what they should be doing or how to go about doing it, I turned my attention to my own thoughts on what direction I should be going in since the kingdom's return to reality.
'It has been what Luna says was two millennia of absence and seeing that everyone probably, for the most part, has forgotten about us than we are probably in the clear from any kind of retribution or retaliation for any wrongdoings we have committed in the past.'
'I wonder if I can now implement those technological advancements I have been meaning to put in use, airships, gunpowder weaponry, better metallurgy techniques...the list of shit I have in my head can go on forever but I know that I can't use them all because of what they need is something we don't have at the moment.'
'So I guess first things first, I will need to gather my forces, find out what I have available to me, expand my sphere of influence, reclaim the lands that have been lost to us, set up new contacts with the outside world and lastly see if the other cities and towns of the empire have survived throughout the years or if they have been put into stasis like us.'
With those thoughts circulating in my head I then came back to my senses to find myself in a not so empty dining hall.
The rest of the equestrians is here with the princesses sitting together along with their six civilians and baby dragon, and as for those that are from here, Forge was sitting beside me with Crucio on my left, the others, on the other hand, are not here with us.
My guess is that they are either still asleep or are elsewhere within the palace doing their duties for the festival.
With just the three of us and the rest of the equestrians here I decided that now would be a good time to ask a few questions just to see if the outside world has changed if at all from what it was in the past.
Casting a glance towards Celestia I began to open my mouth but I was beaten to the punch when Twilight started to talk.
She was talking about the Crystal Kingdom and all of the information she was getting this from was from an old history book that she found. I am pretty sure that Celestia knows all this because she used to live here in the past.
Another thing she was talking about that Celestia already knows is that back then the gryphons were nothing more than savages and bandits until they all united under their king before he was slain by a pale demon encased in grey armor. Of course, that was referencing to me because at the time I had to wear that crappy pig iron that the natives had access to at the time even though the steel-making techniques I had introduced to them at the time was just barely being picked up and used by the locals.
I guess the equine race is a bit slow on picking up on advantageous technological advancements that can prove beneficial to their race.
As the lavender scholar talked to her mentor about what she found within the old tomes of the empire, the kitchen staff entered with our food. We all ate together, talked about what we are planning to do today but for me, I had to go give a speech before the opening day of the festival can begin.
Shoveling down what food I could manage at the time I finished in record time before dismissing myself and headed straight for the balcony of speeches and to my amazement, there was already ponies gathering down below.
I only had to wait roughly an hour for the entire city to arrive for the festival, thousands of crystal ponies were all standing together, almost all of them being shoulder-to-shoulder with one another while their foals were on their backs, giving them a height advantage to see what was going on.
"Ponies of the Crystal Empire! Lend me your ears! Today we remember those who are no longer with us, those who fought to keep the beasts of the wilds at bay and the clawing talons of the griffons, for those of us who gave their lives to keep those of us who could not defend themselves safe from harm! On this day we remember those who we can no longer speak to, no longer embrace, we remember them and celebrate their sacrifice for the kingdom! On this day we will sing, dance, cheer, compete and spread joy so those who no longer are beside us did not go to the afterlife early in vain! Now go my fellow ponies! Go and enjoy yourself for the coming days we are the masters of our destiny!"
The shouting and cheering from the entire city were deafening, the equestrians were with the crowd and one of them, the pink earth pony with the untamed mane, she was cheering as well. I guess she is a party girl at heart and is just waiting to tear up the food stands.
As the crowd scatters to attend to the festivities and enjoy themselves, I too was planning on joining them but first things first I have some errands to attend to.
Turning around I motioned for my two wardens to follow me, my plans having to be accelerated due to the equestrian princesses being here.
'If only I had more time, I could have kept the equestrians on their side of the border and sent them a missive as soon as I have consolidated my power and had a firm grip on the kingdom. All I have is a city and its occupants, we have no means of resupplying ourselves other than what little food we can farm, our mines are closed, lost or overrun by either foreigners or feral beasts...god damn it! I am being left with so very few options and almost all of them are humiliating at best and down right terrible at worst...'
Going down the stairs I headed towards the communications room and as soon as I entered it I saw that it was unoccupied and derelict. Whoever was in charge of this room has fallen behind in their duty to keep this place clean but I can reprimand them another time, for the time being I have to see if we are alone in this new era or if they followed us.
The communications room was a fairly normal in size, thirty-two by thirty-two feet, on one wall was the map of the Crystal Empire at the height of its power, several cities, towns, ports, mines, outposts and forts were clearly marked with a solid crystal stud. The studs on the map was a signal that those areas had a communications room of their own that was mainly used for military use to send out orders to the officers stationed there, but at the moment the wall was colorless...
Except for a handful of lights.
At first I thought it was just a trick of the light, that they were just messing with me because the light from my armor was bouncing off of them but when I deactivated them and used a torch that was brought with us by a warden, I saw that it was no trick or illusion.
It was real.
We are not alone after all.
Turning to my two wardens I started to give them their orders, I have a lot of work to do and not enough time to get it all done.
Walking among the citizens of the Crystal Empire I saw that every single one of them were happy and content beyond belief, it is almost like they have completely forgotten that they have been stuck in a stasis field for nearly two thousand years. They are probably putting that memory in the back of their minds so they can enjoy themselves and forget all that has happened to them, after all ignorance is bliss and this festival is doing just that, making them forget their worries.
The young colts and fillies were running around, some of them were wearing what looked like wooden masks depicting timber wolves, manticores and even a hydra was being worn by the younglings. Ever since I made the deal with the Forest of Whispers dryad the wild beasts that call it their home have become docile to the empire's citizens, allowing us to come close to them without having to fear of getting mauled or killed, another boon that was bestowed upon us was that our harvests was more bountiful than it should have been and our lumber mills produce finely cut logs with no problems.
But the price for the deal with the dryad...
A pound of flesh and blood, but not the way I thought of what it meant until the time came for me to pay for it.
I still got the scars to prove that the price has been paid.
Enough about my problems though, today is supposed to be a joyous one!
The younglings are playing their own games, the teenagers are out playing the carnival attractions along with the honorable games that the old pony tribes used for competition and glory.
To my left I saw the jousting coliseum was in full swing, a pegasus and a unicorn were squaring off, their armor was set, their lance ready to bluntly injure its opponent, I must say this one has won my heart when I first saw it. Watching the ponies being knocked around, their eyes wobbling around in a dizzy state, sometimes they even say if they caught the number of the carriage that ran them over, so funny but sometimes I wonder if they are alright afterwards. I rather not have to worry about a pony getting killed in this game because they suffered from broken ribs and punctured organs in silence because they didn't want to say anything.
Enforcing the rule of a medic must always be in attendance for the jousting game is a blessing, in the past whenever the Crystal Faire came there was always somepony getting injured, a few times there was even a death or two. But now that I have enforced this rule to the faire and all games that are possibly dangerous, the amount of those getting seriously injured have dropped dramatically and those that would have died would now just be bedridden and be out for a few weeks to recover.
Grinning at the sight of ponies jousting got a chuckle out of me and I went back on my merry way, walking carefully as to not bump into any of the crystal ponies as I kept my eyes peeled for the equestrians along with my friends that are mingling with the citizenry.
'So many happy ponies, this is what Celestia and Luna had to deal with whenever they go out into the public light. They know that I am keeping them safe, their happiness is paramount to my rule and I'll be damned if they take it away from me without a fight!'
It was during my thoughts that I was interrupted when a young pony was tapping on my leg who was trying to get my attention and when I turned my head to look down at them I saw that it was a young unicorn colt.
Kneeling down to get closer to the young pony I saw that they had a rolled up scroll being held in their mouth, this little pony was still too young to reliably use magic.
Taking the scroll from the colt's mouth I broke the wax seal on it and read its contents, it was a message Lord Cog of House Arcana, he said that the project I have given to him back before stasis spell was dropped was back on schedule. When I first came to this world the only use of magic was from unicorns and from the two alicorns, but when I introduced the idea of Magitek I was laughed at because they said it would never work.
But now, they street lamps are powered by magitek, fire-elementally charged crystals encased in a metal and class cage, the refrigeration cabinets now keeps food from spoiling with the assistance of ice-elementally charged crystals, and soon enough I can rule the skies with the airship designs I sent to Lord Cog.
Patting the little colt on the head before reaching to my waist to grab a small coin pouch and passed to the colt a few coins for service rendered. The happy colt trotted off with a bounce in his step as he trotted off into the crowd, a few coins richer for his troubles.
Some would say that conducting my private business in public is a stupid thing to do, but the only thing I am doing is passing along messages and paying the couriers they proper due for their services, and I made sure that no one can properly figure out what is written on the parchment by giving different ciphers to those I work with. I give them the cipher and the coded message, and they send me an equally coded message using the cipher I gave them.
Only once did my messages get intercepted by an overzealous guard captain, and when he couldn't decipher what was written in the scroll did he pass it along to me, hoping to get me to decode it for him. All I did was have him...removed from his position in New Providence and sent to the port city of Fetlock Deep.
Last I heard from him, he was having trouble dealing with unruly sailors who get drunk on the mead they sell in their taverns. Not a problem for a warden to come out and solve.
With my business concluded I went back to participating in the faire, playing games of darts, a brief round of Tug-of-War, that strange game where you try to throw hoops around a plastic/wooden duck's head and you get a prize according to the color painted on its bottom, hell I even went and tried to do a round of jousting but well...
"I am sorry sir but you are just too big to be a part of the competition." The referee said and in all honesty I had to agree with him, I am like, easily four times his size and I don't go down so easily so for all intents and purposes, I would have the home field advantage.
"It is alright, I guess I will forever hold the title of 'Stonewall'." I said with a smirk as I remembered that in the past when I was actually allowed to participate in the jousting tournament, nobody was able to beat me.
Of course my smirk caught the referee's attention as he snapped me out of it.
"Last time I checked sir, Princess Luna was able to knock you over so you don't have the title anymore."
"The only reason I was knocked over was that the equestrian princess was flying at me from a high angle and at a high rate of speed, that she used magic to yank my feet out from under me." And she was using a battering ram instead of a lance.
That fucking battering ram exploded on me but it still did its job.
"Whatever you say sir." The referee said with a chuckle before going back to joust.
Shaking my head at the stallion I left the jousting tournament and kept on going around checking on everything, I had to do my rounds as the day went on.
Eventually the sun was beginning to fall towards the horizon, signaling to the empire that nightfall was imminent and that the night festivities was going to be beginning soon.
Ponies were still playing with some of the games that the faire was providing, but now that it was night time the crystal ponies were now setting up for the astrology teachings along with a class on teaching the citizens on to find their way around by using the stars as a guide.
In all this not only was good for the citizens to learn but it also made the princess of the moon teary eyed as she watched this going on. From what I could gleam from her the few times we spoke, it would seem that the ponies of equestrian have all but forgotten about the night and what it entails but with a few well-spoken and well-placed words I had the lunar diarchal ruler embracing me in a hug as she cried into my shoulder.
It would seem that a thousand years on the moon paying for her sins and being forgotten by pretty much the world has done more damage to her than anyone could have guessed. By telling her that the crystal ponies haven't forgotten her duty of protecting their minds at night from those with malicious intent and also to help them fight of their night terrors when they couldn't do it themselves.
Sure the entire Crystal Empire hates the both of them for abandoning them to Sombra's mad brief reign but most of the ponies, especially the young ones, they have not forgotten that it was her that kept them safe from nightmares.
With the night portion of the faire starting to go into full swing I went back to participating in some of the games, even going so far as to playing a role in a puppet show.
I don't know ponies can do it but with a sock on their hoof they manage to somehow make the head of the puppet do that whole yapping head motion.
My citizens were amused, the pink equestrian seemed to be ecstatic, the rest seemed to be only mildly amused with it with the exception of the cyan pegasus who looks like that she is asleep. Rolling my eyes at the sleeping rude mare I left my spot from behind the stage and went over to meet the crowd and to ask them if they have enjoyed themselves this night.
Once my citizens have finished talking to me, thanking me for participating in the puppet show and also for helping with the festival I retired back to the palace with my entourage. The equestrian delegation followed closely behind me, the six young mares talking amongst themselves, the three alicorn princesses were oddly silent and for a moment I thought that they weren't behind us but they were, they just weren't talking.
Like at all, they were just staring forward and trotting, probably they were speaking through the assistance of telepathy to keep their conversation private and secret.
'Whatever you three are planning to do, please do try to upset it, give me a reason to use this as leverage against you and your nation.'
Tomorrow, the day of blood and true contests will begin.
I wonder if any of the equestrians will be foolish enough to partake in any of them.