We arrived at the large and nondescript building. It could have been an office to just about any company. It had nothing particularly special about it. Work had let me off without a moment of hesitation once I said what it was for.
Starlight leaned her head off to the right, looking the building up and down. "No name?"
There wasn't any name, just an address. "Looks like a generic office building that could have multiple businesses inside."
I stepped free of the car and glanced around the parking lot in a slow sweep. There was nothing that gave much of a hint of anything unusual going on. Maybe I should have stopped looking? After all, it really wasn't anything unusual. Security clearance was only exciting due to movies and media.
This was the real world. I was about to be asked a lot of boring questions. "I'm scheduled first," I noted to Starlight. "So your first job will just be waiting for me."
Starlight rolled her eyes. "You must be nervous. We went over that already and I can handle a little downtime." She wagged the tablet that I had received for Christmas one time and never really used all that much. It had become hers. "I have distractions."
We stepped into the building side by side through the glass double doors and filed into the elevator that was just letting out a gentleman in his 50s, from the look of him. A short ride carried us up to the fifth floor where it became tunnels. Narrow hallways that wove through the building. There were signs that pointed us in the right direction at least, and we stepped into an open door into a small receptionist area.
The receptionist of the day was a slightly younger male than the first we saw. Maybe 40s? "Hello. Do you have an appointment?"
I nodded. "Linda Frohein."
"Frohein..." He clicked at his keyboard. "Here we are. I need you to fill out these. I'm glad you arrived early." He pulled out a clipboard filled with forms and set it out in easy grasping distance on his desk. "Miss Glimmer?"
Starlight perked up. "Yeah?"
"Your appointment requires much of the same paperwork." Out came a second clipboard. "Some notes have been made. Please be mindful of them."
Starlight cocked a brow as she accepted the clipboard and began skimming it. "I'm getting the special one?"
"They don't fill me in on the whys, Miss, just the whats. Turn the pad over when you're finished." His eyes settled back on his screen. We were dismissed.
I gestured for Starlight to sit beside me and I began attacking the form with the provided pen. Much of it went over what I had already given. Were they making sure I was consistent? No point in trying to analyze the meaning when there was a good chance that there was none, just an endless maze of red tape. "If anything confuses you, Starlight, don't hesitate to ask."
Starlight was making her own marks slowly. "I have plenty of time to figure it out before it's my turn anyway," she said confidently as she seemed to jump around the page, to my concern.
"Why are you skipping around like that?" I leaned over to get a peek at what she was doing, to see that large portions of her paper were already marked over with thick black marker. "Oh." It seemed they already knew some questions were not going to have answers they could act on in any meaningful way.
The image of a pony sitting up, her phone ringing. She picks it up and is asked to confirm details about Starlight. That seemed unlikely.
I refocused on my own sheet, determined to get it out of the way. I preferred computer forms over paper ones, given the choice. I imagined I was far from alone in that. I liked typing over holding a pen. Still, that didn't mean I couldn't do it, so I did.
"Miss Frohein."
I looked up to see a new female standing at a door leading further inside. "We're ready to see you."
I rose to my feet, clipboard tucked under an arm. "I'm not quite finished."
"You can complete the survey after the interview. Leave that here." She gestured at the receptionist. "This way, please."
"Good luck," chimed Starlight as she continued with her own forms. "Hope it's as boring as these papers."
At first brush I felt irritated at that curious blessing, but as I moved to follow the lady to my interview, I realized it was a good one. A nice, boring, interview with no surprises. That would be perfectly fine.
She opened a door to a room that looks amazingly familiar to the one I had been approved by the Director and her friends in. It was an interrogation. Lovely. "Will you be joining me?" I asked of the lady that had guided me that far.
"I will be the one asking the questions," she said evenly, stepping in only after I had and closing the door. "I've never seen quite so many notes and caveats on a clearance request form before. Your friend's worse, but I know you know that already." She settled on one side of the table and gestured for the seat across from herself. "Let's begin."
I sank into the indicated chair, sitting upright and ready. "Alright. Where do we start?"
She inclined a pen towards me. "Do you have citizenship in a foreign country?"
Well, technically? "Yes."
She rolled the pen. "Tell me about this country, starting with its name and disposition."
"Its name is Equestria." I smiled a little. "I know that sounds odd, but it is what it is. As names go, it's better than 'earth' since it describes who lives there rather than the fact that it has dirt in it."
"Mmhmm." She made a casual scribble. It wasn't nearly enough. I was likely being recorded. "How did you obtain this citizenship?"
Even I wasn't sure of that entirely... "When I'm there, I am one of them, a pony." A brow quirked on her face but she kept her gaze on me, silently bidding me to continue. "As a pony, citizenship seemed to be included, provided I was willing to follow their laws, which are not too onerous."
"And if you were not a pony?" She made another little scribble. "Would your citizenship still be recognized?"
That was a good question. I imagined standing before Celestia as my human self. I couldn't imagine her kicking me out of the country over it. "If I said I was the same person and proved it, I would be allowed to continue as I have been."
"Very permissive border controls..." She set her pen down. "Do you feel America could learn from Equestria?"
Silent alarms went off on my head. That was a leading question, or so I figured. "All nations could learn something from their neighbors."
She gave a non-committal hmm as she picked the pen back up. "You listed three princesses as contacts, all from this nation. How familiar are you with them?"
"Casual friends," I replied. I didn't know any of them that well, even if I had clumsily made a pass at one of them.
"I see." Down went the pen. She drew out a small black plastic box, unfurled it revealing an ink pad. She stamped the paper she was working on. "Denied."
I blinked. "Just like that?"
She set the pad down and crossed the fingers on her hands. "You don't sound that surprised. You are literally petitioning to be privy to national secrets. You are in contact with foreign governments in a capacity to be coerced. Even presuming the benign nature of this country, casual conversation between cleared members and their uppermost governmental bodies is far from ideal. This is an open and shut case."
Rising from her chair, she gathered the paper she had been scribbling on. "I'm sorry for the wasted time. Dual-citizens are basically never given clearance. Your friend, is she a citizen of that nation as well?"
"One and only," I said, standing up. I felt a little numb. I didn't like 'losing', but there weren't a lot of avenues I saw that would get around that roadblock.
"Her loyalty is clearer then, but it isn't to the United States. You can take her home with you. Thank you." She stepped out and was gone. I had failed entirely to get security clearance.
I returned to the front office to find Starlight was still working on her form. She saw me enter and smiled. "That was a lot faster than I thought it would be. I'm not even done."
"Don't bother." I reached for her clipboard. "They disqualified us for reasons they should have known coming in."
Starlight's face turned almost instantly into a scowl. "Really? Why'd they waste our time then?" She did not surrender the clipboard and instead sent it in a twirling arc to land on the receptionist's desk. "Let's get out of here."
I didn't approve of her hurling government property around, but her idea was solid. "Nothing more to do here. Have a nice day." I dipped my head at the receptionist. He looked like he had seen worse reactions before and he didn't stop us from leaving the office.
Once we were in my car, I explained what had happened, "They don't give clearance to people who are citizens of other nations. They have to be loyal to one state alone, and that needs to be the United States, this country. I'm a dual, you're single, but not here."
Starlight strapped herself in. "Makes sense, but they should have just told us that at the start."
They really should have... but... "I don't think everyone is on the same page." I started the car and got us moving. "One person, likely the director, wanted us in, bad, and pushed. She was getting her way until they hit the lady we talked to today, or maybe someone before her that put a stop to it."
Starlight rolled a hand as we went down the road. "So, is that it? Is the director giving up on handling ponies?"
I frowned with thought a moment. "I doubt it... It just means we won't be told half of what we need to be told to do it properly." Another thought struck me and I cringed. "I get to shoot down my boss' ideas for government jobs with my clearance." I grunted as I merged onto a highway. "Just as well, I didn't want to be the only point of contact for clients."
We weren't long in coming close to work again, but I wasn't in a hurry. "It was supposed to take longer than this. How about we get a nibble before heading back?"
"I won't say no to that." Starlight crossed her arms over her front. "If they don't want a great set of people like us working for them, it's their loss."
I smiled at that. "That's a good attitude to have. What are you in the mood for?"
"I may be going native, but I think I want one of those burgers." She sat up and forward. "One of the messy ones, with beans dripping out of it."
I couldn't help but laugh. "Right-o. Some sloppy burgers to celebrate the sloppy life we've run into."