//------------------------------//
// Chapter 28: Stronger 
// Story: New Revelations 
// by Phantom Shadow 
//------------------------------//

	Thunderlane continued to sit at the table after Rumble left, staring into the abyss as he focused his thoughts on what had to be done next.  Although it was plainly obvious that he had to talk to Rarity about what happened, he couldn't shake how she would react from his mind.  Could he really live with himself, knowing very well what would happen?  Could he live with himself if he did nothing at all?

Don't be so naïve, he thought to himself as he emitted a sigh and sat up straight.  This has to be done.  No turning back, no backing down.

Nodding once to himself, Thunderlane got up and exited the inn, making his way into the busy streets of Ponyville.  Although a cool breeze that blew by made him feel at ease, he quickly refocused his thoughts on where he was going.  It was only when he starting think about what he was going to say and how he would say it did he start to slow down, his once confident attitude starting to drain from him.

What am I supposed to say? Thunderlane asked himself.  How do I start this?  Do I let her talk or do I just break it to her?  Is there even a point in letting her talk?  How exactly do I go about doing this?

His unasked questions went unanswered as he reached his destination sooner than he anticipated.  It was only when he laid eyes upon the establishment did he stop trotting all together as one last question entered his mind: Is now the right time to do this?

Despite having the utmost confidence and helping Rumble overcome his feelings, to some extent, it was only in the face of day did doubt start plaguing his mind.  Thunderlane began taking some deep breaths as his heart began beating faster than before, though it did next to nil to calm him down.

Squeezing his eyes shut and gritting his teeth, Thunderlane began recollecting all that had happened, all the lies that were told, all the times he was made to believe he and Rumble had a chance at finding true love.  Although the pain was enough to make his eyes pool with tears, he was able to prevent it as they shot open, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

No, Thunderlane thought as a spark of confidence washed over him, making him trot forward again.  I have to do this.  I have to talk to her.  I...I have to...

His train of thought was immediately interrupted as he began thinking about the aftermath of it all again; try as he might, he couldn't shake the inevitable look of despair she would have when all was said and done.  Just thinking about it made his heart sink, which made him mentally curse himself for having one in the first place; why did he have to care so much?

I can't hurt her...not now...not like this, Thunderlane thought.  She may have dragged us through the mud, but that doesn't mean I should stoop to her level.

Immediately, he slapped his face and shook his head.  What am I saying?  I can't let her get away with this.  This has to be done, regardless of what happens!

Biting his lower lip, his eyes shifted from the ground to the building over and over again.  His thoughts were stuck in a perpetual tug-of-war, leaving him lost and confused as half of him screamed to do it now and the other half tried to talk him out of it.  His breathing started to become labored as the bottoms of his hooves started to go numb, making his legs tremble.

I...I should get back home, he thought as he turned around and began trotting away.  I...I need more time to think this through.

As he took several deep breaths again, he continued making his way through town.  Since the crowds of ponies cleaning the town were beginning to diminish, it was easier for him to get to the inn than it was when he had left.  Thankfully, his anxieties began to lessen the moment his home came into view; hopefully, he would be able to find some clarity and come to a definitive decision.  Unfortunately, it was only when he was a yard or two in front of the building did the mood shift in a way he wasn't prepared for.

"Thunderlane," a voice behind him said, making him freeze in his tracks.  He didn't need to turn around to know who it was; he recognized her voice instantaneously.  His neck muscles began tensing up as he tried to get all his thoughts together as fast as he could.

"Thunderlane," the voice said again, albeit softer.

Thunderlane's heart began beating faster than before as he searched for the right words to say.  It was only when he heard her call his name for a third time did he squeeze his eyes shut as his eyebrows furrowed.  He took several deep breaths, hoping it was enough to prevent the venom he kept bottled inside from spewing out.

Thankfully, he found it in himself to remain calm and collected as he asked in a firm, but civil manner, "What do you want, Rarity?"

"I...I wanted to talk to you about...about last night," she said, an insecure tone in her voice.

Thunderlane didn't say a word as he kept his back to her, refusing to turn and face the mare he once loved.  Whether it was out of hatred or regret, he couldn't find it in himself to look her in the eyes as she said what she had to say.

Taking the hint, Rarity softly said, "I...I wanted to apologize for..."

"For what?" he interrupted, his voice as cold as ice.  "For lying to me?  For lying to Rumble?  For lying about Sweetie Belle?  For destroying everything we built together?  For what, Rarity?  Pick one!"

His outburst made her fall silent for several moments; as much as she wanted to retort about his behavior, she knew all of it was warranted.

"I know that just saying, 'I'm sorry' won't take away what I did," she said after a while.  "But you have to understand that...I never wanted to hurt you, Rumble, or Sweetie Belle like this."

It was those words that made him turn around and face Rarity with a look of disbelief.  Despite his best efforts, he saw the anguish in her face; her eyes were red with deep circles underneath them.  Her mane, although attempted to look kempt, was frazzled and sticking out in many places.  The black mascara smears on her cheeks were a clear indication that she had been crying prior to now.  Overall, she looked as he felt: a total wreck.

Although he did everything in his power to avoid it, Thunderlane couldn't help but feel sympathetic for her; clearly, she was destroyed by all of this just as much as he was.  However, he kept his posture straight as he tried to maintain his anger and say what needed to be said.  Try as he might, his anger, mixed with his sympathy, began taking its toll on him, making his words come out in a breathy whisper.

"Seriously?" he asked.  "You knew what you were doing.  You knew the lies you were telling.  You knew how this would al end!  How can you possibly stand there and tell me you 'never wanted to hurt' anypony?  Tell me, Rarity, 'cause I'd love to hear it!"

The words were on the tip of her tongue, having said all of this already to Applejack and Sweetie Belle.  It was only because of his sudden questioning and the pain in his voice that the words seemed to be escaping her.  In an attempt to find them, she looked at the ground as her eyes shifted back and forth in desperation.

Thunderlane let out a scoff and said in a sarcastic tone, "Yeah, that's what I thought."

It was only when he turned and started trotting away did Rarity find her voice again.  "Thunder, please, I'm trying to make this right."

A hoof on the door to the inn, Thunderlane stopped where he was for several seconds before saying, "There's nothing you can say or do that'll make this right."

With that, he entered the inn, leaving her to stand there with a stunned look on her face.  Thinking there was nothing left to say, Rarity turned and began slowly trotting away, her head hanging as it did the previous night.  However, she stopped trotting and lifted her head as a determined look came across her face.

No, she thought as she turned and began trotting towards the inn.  You can't turn away this time.  You have to talk to him.  Even if he doesn't want to listen, he needs to hear the truth.

Wasting no time, she galloped into the building and up the stairs, bee-lining to his door before pausing for a brief second to maintain her confidence.  With all the strength she could muster, she knocked on the door.  When the sounds of his hoof-steps were heard, Rarity's heart started rapidly beating again.

"Who is it?" he called out.

"You know who it is," she said.  "Please let me in.  We need to talk."

"Rarity, there's nothing left to talk about.  Just...leave me alone, alright?"

Stomping a hoof on the floor, Rarity shouted, "No, Thunderlane!  I came here to talk to you and that's what I'm going to do, even if that means talking through the door!"

As a moment of silence followed, she felt a small tear drop stream down her face, which she quickly wiped away.  However, it did nothing to prevent her voice from breaking ever so slightly.

"I know what I did was wrong," Rarity stated, her voice lowering a few decibels.  "I know there's nothing I can say or do to take it back or make it better, but if you'd let me explain, you'd understand why...why I felt I didn't have a choice."

As she turned her head away from the door in an attempt to prevent herself from breaking down, Thunderlane asked in a softer tone, "What do you mean 'didn't have a choice'?  You had the choice to tell me the truth and you didn't."

"I know," she responded.  "I just...didn't want to lose you.  I didn't want to push you away.  I didn't...I didn't..."

The pain more than she could bear, she slowly fell to the ground and began sobbing.  This went on for many moments, even though it felt like an eternity.  Although it wasn't her intention, it must have broke him as well, for the sound of him unlocking the door and opening it soon followed.

As best as she could, Rarity cleared her eyes and looked up to Thunderlane, a mix of guilt and resentment plastered on his face.  They stared at each other for at least a minute before Thunderlane stepped aside and gestured with his head for her to enter.  Trying her best to clear her eyes of her tears, she rose up and slowly entered the room.  As he closed the door behind her, she stood in the middle of the room and waited for him to accompany her.  Fortunately, it didn't take long before he trotted past her and sat down at the table, prompting her to follow.

They sat across from each other, eyeing one another in silence; it was like one was waiting for the other to speak first.  Thunderlane broke the silence first by saying as calmly as he could, "What do you mean?"

Sniffling, Rarity wiped her eyes and said, "That was the reason I lied to you, to Rumble, to everypony.  I...I didn't want to lose you."

"So, what you're saying is that you lied to me...to us...about everything...because you didn't want to 'lose me'?" he asked.  Before she could say anything in reply, he shot back, "That doesn't make any sense!"

"I know," she quickly stated.  "That's what I wanted to explain to you."

Rarity then went on to recap what had happened from the beginning, from how Sweetie Belle was being treated by other ponies, to how his statement about not wanting to introduce Rumble to those kinds of relationships yet triggered her to lie.  She explained how she tried to help them get together to see if they would be happier, only to realize that Sweetie Belle was anything but, and she, Scootaloo, and Rumble paid the price for her interference.

As she continued explaining, Thunderlane tried to maintain his serenity, even though his insides were beginning to tear him down.  Like he had said to Rumble earlier, he shared some of the blame in what happened by not talking to him about these things earlier.  After hearing how telling Rarity this caused her to do what she did, it only set it in stone and made him feel worse.

"You have to believe me," Rarity said, snapping him out of his thoughts.  "I didn't want any of this to happen, not like this.  I just wanted all of us to be happy, but I couldn't stop myself.  Every time I wanted to tell you the truth, we'd end up getting closer and closer.  The closer we got, the harder I found it to tell you.  I know that's no excuse for my behavior, but...but..."

She lowered her head in shame as her tears began to stream down her cheeks again.  "...I'd do anything to take it all back."

Allowing her words to sink in for several moments, Thunderlane mustered up his strength to ask, "So...you lied about everything, huh?"

Rarity nodded once in response.

His breathing becoming shallower, he got up, turned his back to her and asked in a shaky voice, "Then...that means you lied when you told me you loved me, right?"

Immediately, Rarity lifted her head, her eyes wide and her heart racing.  However, she didn't get a chance to even open her mouth before Thunderlane turned to her and said, "I was nothing to you but another pawn in your sick game, wasn't I?"

"No!" she exclaimed through tears.  "I admit that I lied about everything, but if there was anything I was honest about, it was my feelings for you!"

"Yeah, sure they were," he muttered sarcastically as he turned away from her again.  He lifted his head up to look at the ceiling in a desperate attempt to keep the tears in his eyes, but to no avail.  

An uncomforting silence followed as Thunderlane lowered his head and covered his eyes with a hoof as if it would stop the tears.  All Rarity could do was stare at him, her eyes shifting back and forth as her ears laid flat on her head.  As much as she wanted to say something, anything to try to make him believe her, deep down she knew there was nothing that would change his mind.  She didn't dwell on this for long because this wasn't the main reason she wanted to speak to him.

As soft as she could muster, Rarity finally said, "Thunderlane?"

"What?" he responded, his back still facing her.

"I'm not asking for you to take me back.  I'm not asking you to still love me.  But...please...can you ever find it in your heart...to forgive me?"

Time halted to a stop as his thoughts began swirling in his head again.  After everything that had been said and done, every single molecule of his being shouted at him to say the first thing that came to mind, to tell her what she deserved to hear.  However, he kept thinking about Rumble and all that he had said to him earlier.

Reluctantly, he turned around to face Rarity, their eyes locking onto one another as Thunderlane's breathing started to become more and more labored.  Looking into her painful eyes started making his heart pound harder than before, his ribcage starting to physically hurt.

"I really want to say 'no'," he said, his tone barely above a whisper and with a sting of anger.  "But that would make me no better than you.  So, yes...I forgive you."

Although it was the first ounce of good news she had received from him, it did nothing to lift her spirits.

"If anything, I really should be thanking you for all of this," he added.  He watched as she gave him a slightly confused look before continuing.  "Before I met you, I really did believe in 'love at first sight', that love was something that was so easily found.  That would probably explain why I fell in love with you so easily, without question, without hesitation.

"You taught me not to trust anypony so quickly, especially when you know nothing about them," Thunderlane said as he held his head higher than before.  "Yes, you hurt me and Rumble, but we were just fine before you and we'll be fine without you.  So, I thank you for making me a better pony than I was, for making me stronger than I was before I met you."

Rarity was speechless beyond compare.  Although what he said was to be expected, something about it hit her harder than she really anticipated.

"You want a small piece of advice?" he asked.  Not waiting for her to reply, he swallowed a lump in his throat before continuing, "I think you should hang out with your friend Applejack more often.  Maybe some of her honesty will rub off onto you because that's something you really seem to be lacking."

Left with nothing else to say, she watched as Thunderlane turned his back on her once again, his head still held high.  With one last deep breath, Thunderlane said in a humble tone, "Now, get out and don't ever come back."

She lowered her head again as she slowly made her way to the door.  When she opened it and stepped through, she said softly, "Goodbye, Thunderlane."

With that, she closed the door behind her, leaving him alone.  A few minutes felt like a lifetime before he could find the strength in his legs to move.  Slowly, he trotted to his bedroom and looked out his window.  For a brief moment, a wave of guilt washed over him as he watched Rarity slowly trotting towards town with her head still hanging low.

It was only when she had disappeared over the horizon did he say, "Goodbye, Rarity."

Then, he trotted away from the window, ready to begin his life anew without her.





Rarity slowly trotted into town, ignoring anypony that got in her way.  She wandered through town aimlessly until she found the nearest bench underneath the shade of a tree.  Sitting down, she looked at the ground as everything that just transpired sank in.  Thankfully, her tear ducts had dried up and anything remaining in her eyes was gone, but that did little to make her feel any better.

As her eyes shifted back and forth and her thoughts swirled like water down a drain, she couldn't help but mentally scoff at herself; did she really anticipate anything else to happen?  Did she really think he would accept her apology and let her walk away without any final, harsh words?  Despite the inevitable outcome, she'd be lying to herself if she said that it didn't hurt.

Rarity let out a sigh as her thoughts slowly started to settle.  However, her thoughts were interrupted when a familiar voice called her name.  She looked in her direction as the pony in question trotted up to her with a look of concern on her face.

"Hey," Applejack said as she sat down beside her.

"Hi," Rarity responded, refocusing her gaze at the ground.

Applejack didn't need to ask how she was feeling; the look on her face was answer enough.  However, that didn't stop her from asking a question with an obvious answer, "How'd it go...with Thunderlane?"

Rarity sighed and answered, "As expected.  He forgave me for what I did, but he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore."

Applejack didn't say anything in response.  All she did was put a hoof on her back and lightly rubbed it, as if the gesture would help her in anyway.

"There, there, sugar cube," she said as sincerely as she could.  "Ah know it hurts now, but it'll pass in time.  Just keep yer head up and everythin'll be just fine.  Ah just hope ya learned yer lesson in all of this."

It was Rarity's turn to fall silent as she nodded her head in response, letting out another sigh as she did.

In an attempt to lift her spirits, Applejack said, "Look at the bright side; at least he forgave ya, right?"

"Yeah, I suppose," she replied softly.

"Maybe he'll come around someday," she continued.  "Maybe, when yer least expectin' it, he'll be there ta catch ya when yer fallin', ya know?"

Rarity couldn't help but scoff at the statement and say, "Yeah, what are the chances of that happening?"

All Applejack could respond with was a shrug and a half smile, making the smallest fraction of a smile form in the corner of Rarity's mouth.  Although it was brief, it made her feel better than she had all morning.

"You gonna be alright?" Applejack asked with a reassuring smile.

Rarity hesitated, looking at the ground for a moment before answering, "Yes, I'll be fine.  Thank you, Applejack...for everything." 

"Think nothin' of it, sugar cube," she replied as she got up. "Ah guess ah'll see ya later, then?"

Offering a small smile, she answered, "Of course."

Tipping her hat with a smile, Applejack turned and trotted away.  When she was out of eyeshot, Rarity let out one last sigh before she got up and began trotting back to the Boutique.  Although there was deepened regret and agony in her heart, the words that both Thunderlane and Applejack said to her kept echoing in her head.

They're both right, she thought as she made her way through the crowds of ponies.  I caused all of this and I got what I deserved.  No point in feeling sorry for myself.  I've done all I can do, so the only thing that's left is to is put it all behind me and move on.

With that, she continued to trot towards the Boutique.  Although she had made her amends, it did little to heal what was left of her broken heart.  It was only with those thoughts did she say to herself, I hope Scootaloo and Rumble are able to forgive me as well.