Chapter 3: Running a Kingdom
(Twilight)
***
The cratered white orb had been put to rest, but stars still hung in the night's sky. Moments after the moon made its exit, its conductor brushed passed her counterpart. In her passing, Luna lovingly nuzzled her sister. The warden of the night welcomed herself to her sister’s royal bed. The edges of the sheets tucked themselves under the mattress with just an afterthought of her power. Only Luna's head poked above the sheets, lying back against luxurious pillows.
“I can’t do it while you’re watching like that.”
Luna's hooves hooked over the top of the sheets. “But Tia, we often watch you; what does it matter?” Luna asked innocently.
“I just feel... different today.” Maybe that was not the wisest choice of words.
“Art thou still upset?” Luna expressed with slight exasperation. “We know thou dost not like to share thy source of unease, but we are always there for thee.” Luna yawned, wriggling further into comfort.
Twilight glanced back towards the bedchamber, but quickly turned away to hide a blush. She couldn't unsee it. The quivering lower lip, the impossibly wide eyes that seemed to be on the verge of watering.
How could I shut down a face like that? Oh Celestia, this may be the hardest test you have ever given me.
The new princess was still looking upon Luna's night when she spoke. “Luna, I can not tell you what ails me.” Twilight said in her best Celestia impression. The likeness to her teacher, surprising even herself.
Twilight whirled around, realizing she hadn't heard Luna's reply. Fortunately, the Lunar Princess was fast asleep. Twilight sighed with relief. I don’t know if I can get used to being a princess, but I'll do it for Celestia... For Equestria!
Her cheeks reddened as she became painfully aware that she was staring at 'her sister,' while she slept.
Luna's right there, sleeping in my... no, Celestia’s bed.
Luna had insisted her sister dearest, needed company, even though Luna would have been asleep in her own chambers at this hour. Twilight had seen very little of the Princess Luna since her return. She knew even less about what Luna was like. Now, she would be sleeping in the same bed!
It was time for her number one panic avoidance technique. Reading! She removed the towel from her damp, radiant, rainbow mane, and spread the charts and books she needed on the stone balcony railing.
What if I don’t bring the sun up, what will happen? Would there just be eternal twilight? Did the sun and moon always need to be directed by magic? Now that I think about it, Lyra Heartstrings has that crazy theory about worlds with solar and lunar bodies that move by themselves. It is mathematically possible. Maybe I should have listened to her better?
Twilight remembered the theories the mint mare had about bipedal beings that ‘drove’ in metal chariots.
Stop that, you have to focus! You're already falling behind. You don't want to be... tardy!
A terrified expression crossed her face. One that her friends knew all too well, but still made them uneasy.
“NO! It will be fine,” She whispered to herself. That kind of frantic hysteria is what got you here in the first place.
She focused back on the books and scrolls before her. The texts were like nothing Twilight had read before. It’s so… unscientific, illogical, and kind of crazy.
No! These are not qualities I can associate with her.
It's one thing to read about theories of nuclear fusion reactions, but what was it like, to live it?!
With one last glance at her resources, her horn ignited. The point glowed like a small sun of its own, perched on the end of her horn. She had made a brief list to make sure everything went smoothly.
Okay, onto step 3 of 32.
Twilight spread her wings, spanning a third of the balcony; Her eyes, glowing with magic and visions of the cosmos.
At first, it was as though she were watching herself and the sun from above. Soon, she was the sun. The sensation scared her at first. At the same time, it felt... good... no... great! The energy of the solar mass billowed inside her, the power of endless burning flames seething beneath her coat. The same flames that were vital to all life on the planet, were also capable of ending all of it just as easily.
It wasn't an observation of malice. It was simply fact! Had she really shivered, or was it just her conciseness recoiling from the apocalyptic musings? It was hard to tell. Was this magical high a from of clarity or delusion?
The notes suggested this spell took on mental imagery based on the nature and character of the caster. For Twilight Sparkle, the results were similar to a chalkboard. The never ending void of space was her slate. A slate upon which to scribe the orbital mechanics of this world. A torrent of ellipses, and mathematical expressions flowed rapidly around her. The lines were drawn up by dancing chalk lines of stardust.
Hmm. It seems I have attained a form of omni-directional awareness. This would be great for taking notes!
She observed the sun's position in her model. I'll just nudge this along this line here, and...
...It was over. She was left staring over the balcony railing at the city below.
Twilight Sparkle, barely held back a foalish scream of excitement. She lightly bit her lip until the urge was thoroughly strangled. That was amazing. I wonder if that's how Rainbow feels about Sonic Rainbooms? Nopony will notice it was 1.735 minutes late, right?
With the power of the sun no longer within her, the exhaustion of the evening's events bared upon her. She caught herself staring at Luna once again at her bedside. So peaceful, powerful, and beautiful all at the same time.
A post sunrise nap was part of Celstia's normal routine. This she knew from all the times she snuggled with Celestia on this very bed as a filly. Often too excited about some upcoming personal magic lessons to get any real sleep. Instead she would just bask in her mentor's warm embrace and count the feathers on the wings wrapped around her.
Finally, Twilight reluctantly slipped under the covers next to Luna. She faced away from her, but it did little to reduce the awkwardness. I can’t wait to move it again, she thought.
“Finally sleep… at 5:53,” Twilight half whispered half yawned.
She missed the brief peek she received from across the bed.
***
Twilight stirred a little to the sound of voices in the hall, before she forced herself back to sleep. Outside the large chamber doors, many mares and colts in various staff uniforms were gathered in a heated discussion.
“You know what happened last time she didn’t get them,” a colt exclaimed. He bore a fancy accent and white cuffs around the top of his hooves.
“There isn’t anything I can do. Doughnut Joe didn’t tell me about this until twenty minutes ago,” a mare chimed in.
“You have to keep your voice down Golden Chalice,” a second mare added, putting a hoof over the other two mouths. They scowled at her, but stayed quiet.
“You all agree somepony must tell her though, or it will be the ruin of all of us,” she said in a whisper.
The others nodded in agreement.
The stallion stroked his mustache. “Excellent idea! Porcelain Pot, you can tell her and we will stay out here.”
“Silver Platter." Porcelain Pots addressed the stallion with clenched teeth. "That’s not—”
“Thanks a lot for volunteering," Golden Chalice said, cutting off the maid's objection.
The mob of staff ponies pushed the ‘volunteer’ up to the doors.
“Your highness, your highness.” Porcelain Pot’s voice was accompanied by a tapping hoof, slightly muffled by the chamber doors.
“Wha... what,” Twilight groaned, lifting her head from a saliva soaked pillow. Groggily, she looked at the metal alarm clock on the bed stand.
8:00, only two hours and seven minutes of sleep.
The voice outside the door continued. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but something terrible has happened. Would you please let me enter? I must tell you face to face.” She sounded scared and distressed.
Twilight was the princess now, and considered going back to sleep.
Should I let them in? It could be a real emergancy. Twilight rolled in her bed with her eyes barely open.
“I guess… I mean, you may enter!”
There was an odd silence for almost three minutes. Twilight thought she heard somepony cough. The sound echoed in the marble halls beyond the door.
“Um princess, are you going to open the door?” The mare’s voice sounded meek and confused.
“Oh, of course.” I forgot about the magic doors.
The doors swung open with a gold envelope of force, and Twilight found a groveling mess in front of her. She was a unicorn, with a blue grey coat and blue and white mane. The mare had a fine tea set as a cutie mark and wore a simple serving outfit.
“Your... your majesty. Your shipment has been... lost.” The mare covered her head in shame.
“What shipment?” Celestia’s face showed genuine concern. "What valuable resource has been taken? Information, medicine, equipment for the guard?!"
“Your Cloud Cakes, they were st... sto... stolen,” she stuttered. “Please oh please forgive me.” By this point the mare's chin was pressed to the polished floor.
“... What... what?” Twilight’s face contorted. “Oh come on! You interrupted my sleep for this?!”
“You told me you desired Cloud Cakes at 8:00, every morning no matter what. We... I have failed you.”
Porcelain risked a glance upwards to her Princess. Oh no, not that face. I’ll be lucky to just be fired. Porcelain Pot looked back through the doors and noticed a scowl from Silver Platter and the others for almost getting them involved.
“Well, its 8:05 now and I don’t see any cakes.” I just want to sleep.
“Wha... what do you wish to be d-done?” I’m going to be banished or turned to stone or made into pastries myself and consumed by the princess.
“Do you know what I’m going to do?” Twilight said in a raised voice, while she closed the doors.
“Please don’t turn me into cake and eat me! Just fire me. Doughnut Joe didn’t tell me in time...” The pleading continued.
What is wrong with these ponies? What does Doughnut Joe have to do with this?
The quivering mare stopped staring at the floor and looked up at the princess for an answer.
“I, am going, to sleep!” Twilight grabbed a dry pillow and set her head down upon it.
After a few moments, she opened her eyes to see Porcelain Pot still bowed on the ground.
“Are you leaving? I’m going to sleep whether or not you stay.”
The serving mare was beyond confused. She backed all the way up to the door as if expecting a trick. She fumbled at the magically sealing door.
The door isn’t opening, what is she planning? If I become a pastry will I still have a pony mind? Porcelain Pot’s thoughts kept racing.
She started scraping at the doors in panic, until golden magic opened them with a sigh from the bed. As the doors slammed shut, Twilight realized Luna was missing from the disheveled covers.
She must have gone back to her room. Thought Twilight.
“What in the hay is going on around here? What is so important about giving me pastries?” Twilight shrugged. At least I can sleep in peace now. She started snoring almost immediately.
On the other side of the double doors, Porcelain Pot stood, hyperventilating against the enchanted wood.
“Are you okay?” Golden Chalice looked relieved to see her.
“So what did she do to you?” asked Silver Platter.
“She yelled a lot and then... went to sleep.”
***
After being woken up by the royal shoe polisher, crown polisher, room maids, and a few royal messengers, all within five or ten minutes of each other, Twilight ordered the guards to keep everypony away until noon.
Why can’t they have one polisher for the crown and the shoes? Efficiency sure is lacking around here.
Six hours was all she needed. After all, sleeping was a waste of time. Especially when one could just binge on coffee for a few days of proper study!
As if on cue, a knock came at noon. At least this time the studious mare felt relatively rested. A large box of scrolls, around seven by seven hooves, had been left at the door. A note was pinned to the side:
Princess Celestia
I am sorry to present you with this now, but there are many important matters within these pages, along with the usual paperwork. Please send these via a royal courier before 4:00pm.
Department of Royal Affairs
The two guards by the doors grew uncomfortable as the princess stared at the stack of paperwork.
“This is great!” The shriek caused both the pegasus guards to fly up into the ceiling, loosening some chips of marble. Their gold colored helmets prevented any serious damage.
“Could one of you send for some lunch... oh, sorry? I got a little too excited.”
Twilight apologized to the dizzy guards, slipping back through the thick doors with the large crate grasped in telekinesis.
Stonewall headed off to the kitchen, his head still sore.
Why did you have to do so well on your Royal Guard exams? It had to be better than perimeter post, right? ‘Just stand in front of the big doors and be intimidating,’ they said. It's easy bits, they said!
The stallion most certainly did not stomp down the halls. No, he was marching with vigor.
***
“Okay, time to learn about Equestrian affairs.” The alicorn gave a squee of excitement before levitating the first page to Celestia’s work desk.
I hope what I’ve read will help. How hard can politics be? All I have to do is pick what is best for Equestria.
“For Celestia, for Equestria!” Twlight quietly declared with a hoof pump.
As she breezed through all the paperwork, she couldn't help but feel it was written to influence the reader into a decision. She felt confident her final checks and signatures were made out of her own reasoning.
The tax system is fascinating, although it could use some tweaks.
A few scrolls stuck out from the rest, not just because they were in their own special cases. Twilight recited the basics of what she deemed noteworthy.
“ACT 42 Waste Management Improvement Plan: includes the upgrading of many cities from outhouse-style waste disposal, including Appleoosa... Approved! We have modern plumbing, everypony! It’s time to get with the program.”
“ACT 52: Expansion of Renewable Energy Projects Plan: This one includes a dam construction on Forelock River near Ponyville, and experimental windmills in Maneasota... Approved! Renewable energy still seems important even though the environment appears to be doing fine.”
“ACT 66: Project Pie: This one came in a magically sealed cylinder, labeled top secret. “Full scale experiments on the mare Pinkie Pie... Declined. What a waste of government spending. Besides, Pinkie Pie has to be ready to wield the Element of Laughter, and of course she’s my friend. Am I letting personal bias sway my opinion? No, her powers could be wrongly exploited by the military, then fall into the wrong hooves. It's unethical to kidnap and experiment on live sapient beings.”
“Speaking of military, let’s not forget about the ally proposal with the Griffons in a declaration of war against the Diamond Dogs. That was a tough one to decide. The Diamond dogs gem mines have been stretching into Equestrian and Griffon territory. That explains what happened to Rarity. I hope everypony, and I guess every Griffon, is accepting of my decision.”
She rested a hoof on her chin, trying to think of anything else that needed to be reviewed.
“Well it’s only 2:30. It’s time to go see how Canterlot is faring and get to the bottom of this pastry nonsense.”
I also need to learn how to send letters back to Celest... me... oh whatever. That can wait a bit. I can handle things around here. Besides, it’s been a while since I gave Joe a visit.
“Celestia, your food selection has been prepared. Would you like us to bring it in?” Twilight recognized the voice speaking through the door as Porcelain Pot.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m going out to eat. Oh, and while I’m out, have somepony install some sort of communication device in here. Yelling through the door is inefficient!”
Twilight never saw the train of food carts prepared by the serving staff file back down the halls. Stonewall facehoofed. He caught the irate serving mare just as she made a rush for the door, flailing her forelegs menacingly.
“Celestia! I’ll get you for playing with my feelings so help…” Porcelain Pot’s muzzle was plugged by Stonewall’s hoof.
“What was that?” Twilight inquired.
Stonewall kept the raging serving mare silent and answered in her stead. “We’ll get right on that your highness!” At least the pay is good. Just keep thinking about your daughter in Ponyville. Hold on Dinkey, daddy's coming soon?
Porcelain Pot stopped struggling and sighed, “She is right. Yelling through the door is stupid.”
***
To be continued.