"SONATA! GET YOUR WORTHLESS SPACE CADET ASS OUT HERE RIGHT NOW SO I CAN CUT OFF YOUR FINGERS, YOUR LEGS, YOUR CLIT, YOUR HAIR, AND YOUR EARS, IN THAT ORDER!!"
Fluttershy screamed, bolted out of the kitchen, and locked herself in the bathroom.
Everyone else stared in the direction of the enraged shrieking, eyes wide. "What the hell?!" Sunset exclaimed.
"Someone's PMSing," Uncle Rear observed cattily.
"I-is that...is that Adagio?" Twilight asked shakily, her face pale.
"Oopsie," Sonata said with a giggle. "Guess that last GIF I texted her was maaaaaybe pushing it a bit too far."
Flash whipped his head around to stare at Sonata, his mouth going dry. "Wh-what the hell did you text her?!"
"Umm..." Sonata touched a finger to her chin in a pose of thoughtful cuteness. "A dog eating a pile of poop?"
"Oh, ouch," Uncle Rear said.
Twilight blinked. "Huh? I don't—"
Flash groaned, burying his face in his palms. "You didn't," he moaned.
Sunset shook her head and sighed. "Okay, I know Adagio is kind of a bitch, but she's usually more...composed than to overreact to something like that."
"Eh, she's been really on edge lately," Sonata said. "And then there's the whole, well, I refused to come home when she called, pretty much ordered her and Aria to bring my stuff here..."
Another window shattered. Flash flinched. Uncle Rear frowned, standing up. "Alright, enough is enough," he said, marching to the front door. "I'm all for screaming drama fits, but only up to the point where some little tramp starts breaking my brother's windows." He threw open the door. The teens inside heard him yelling at Adagio, who yelled back; a minute later, Uncle Rear returned to the kitchen, a stiff-legged, frizzed-out, puffed-up Adagio in tow, radiating hate and malice at the room at large.
"SO-NA-TA," she growled as her gaze landed on the target of her ire, "I am going to make your life a living hell if you don't get your ass home right now!"
Sonata folded her arms and returned Adagio's glare with a frosty stare. "Fuck you," she said.
Adagio's eye twitched. "What did you just say to me?" she said in a soft, dangerous tone.
Sunset frowned and stood up. "I'm pretty sure she said fuck you," she said. "And I don't blame her. I'm not cool with her just deciding she's gonna live here and we're still dealing with that, but if this is what she's been putting up with? I don't blame her for telling you to eat shit."
Adagio whipped around to glare at her. "You stay out of this, you reject from Equestria!"
Twilight stood up. "That. Is. ENOUGH!" She walked over to Adagio, meeting her furious stare with calm composure. "You're not impressing anyone with all this screaming and breaking stuff," she said. "If you don't sit down, calm down, and get ready to talk this out like a reasonable person, Sunset and I are going to drag you, physically, back through the portal to Equestria and deal with you there." She paused for one deep breath, then added, "And in Equestria, I'm an alicorn."
She let that hang in the air for a long moment.
Adagio, visibly seething, plopped herself in the chair Fluttershy had vacated, arms crossed, aiming a sullen glare at Twilight.
"Woooow," Pinkie breathed into the heavy silence, popping candy-coated licorice bites into her mouth from a little purple carton. "You go, Twilight!"
Fluttershy reappeared. "Umm...there's a lot of broken glass in the living room," she said. "I, umm...I'll sweep it up if—"
"Broom and dustpan are in the laundry closet," Flash said absently.
"Okay," Fluttershy said. "Umm...good luck with...all this..." She disappeared again.
Twilight took a deep breath. "Now—"
"Oh, and um, sorry, but...there's an awful lot of implements of murder on the front lawn," Fluttershy said suddenly, reappearing before Twilight could get going. "Umm...maybe somebody should do something about that?"
"Lock it all up in your van," Sunset said absently. "We're confiscating it."
"Oh. Um." Fluttershy worried at the hem of her skirt. "It's just that...I don't know if I want to handle some of this...stuff..."
"Just imagine you're using it on Zephyr Breeze," Pinkie offered.
Fluttershy nodded. "Right, got it." She disappeared again.
Twilight blinked, staring after her. "What the—"
"Don't ask," Sunset said.
Shaking her head, Twilight returned to the task at hand. "Right, so, just so I have all the facts, explain this whole showing up here breaking stuff and threatening to mutilate Sonata."
Adagio glared at her. "It's no concern of yours, Princess," she spat. "This is between me and the worthless ditz."
"I am NOT worthless!" Sonata snapped. "Just because you're an arrogant, conceited bitch and Aria hates literally everything doesn't give you the right to call me worthless! Besides, you two can't even feed yourselves without me around to cook for you!"
"Is that so?" Adagio challenged.
Sonata snorted. "Adagio, before the Battle of the Bands, you had exactly three skills. Singing, manipulation, and sex. Now you're down to two." She fixed Adagio with a haughty smirk. "Sure, you can probably whore your way through life like you've ALWAYS DONE, but now that none of us have our magic anymore, what's even the point of me putting up with your bullshit?"
Adagio's left eye twitched. "My bullshit?"
"Yeah," Sonata challenged, leaning forward and narrowing her eyes. "Your bullshit. Whose idea was trying to take the Equestrian magic at CHS? Whose idea was the Battle of the Bands? Whose idea was it to spread the plague across half of Stirrope?" She threw up her hands. "THE PLAGUE, ADAGIO! THAT WAS ALL ON YOU, AND FOR WHAT? We only got enough juice out of that to keep us fresh and tasty for about sixty years! Just long enough to find the next war to feed on!" She pinched the bridge of her nose. "You think I wanted to kill tens of thousands of humans just to stay young, cute, and sexy? We could've waited for something bad enough to happen all by itself! HUMANS LOVE MAKING EACH OTHER MISERABLE!"
Everyone stared at Sonata.
Pinkie shrugged. "Well, she's not wrong," she said.
Adagio raised an eyebrow. "And you've ever had any good ideas, hmm?"
"YES! I HAVE!" Sonata shouted. "How about, I dunno...giving up, falling in love, starting a family, growing old surrounded by people who love you?" She threw her arms up in the air. "I'd have been fine with being an old granny a hundred years ago! Immortality kinda starts to suck after the first couple hundred years!"
"Really," Adagio drawled. "Then why didn't you strike out on your own sooner?"
Sonata pursed her lips, sitting back in her chair. "Because I didn't wanna, okay? As long as I kept hanging around with you and Aria, I didn't actually have to put any effort into anything. I can't help it, I'm lazy." She shrugged. "But now that we can't magic people anymore, there's no point in staying together. You can't do jack except screw guys to get them to do stuff for you, and you and Aria are both such complete and total bitches I can't stand being around you anymore. So I'm done." She crossed her arms, glaring defiantly at Adagio.
Sunset blinked. "Wow," she said. "I...had no idea you were dealing with all that," she said.
"Neither did I," Flash said, eyes wide.
Uncle Rear looked back and forth between the Sirens. "You're immortal?" he asked.
"Well, we were," Adagio said sourly, glaring hotly at Twilight and Sunset. "Not anymore, of course. You and your little band of friends took care of that."
"It was your own fault," Twilight said. "You didn't give us any choice. You turned the entire student body of CHS against each other. We did what we had to do to save the world from you."
Adagio snorted. "Typical pony hero complex," she snarled. "First that bearded bastard, now you and your goody-goody friendship magic."
"Well what did you expect, Adagio?!" Sonata cried in exasperation, throwing her hands up. "We're evil! HELLO!"
"I'm getting a little sick of your tone," Adagio snapped, glaring at Sonata.
"Yeah? Well I'm getting a LOT sick of YOU!" Sonata retorted. "Like I said, I'm not coming home and you can't make me, and I'm not the least bit afraid of you!"
"Oh, you will be," Adagio seethed, eyes narrowed.
Fluttershy walked back in. Flash sat back in his chair. "Okay, look," he said. "All Sonata needs from you is her stuff. If you're not gonna bring it over, I guess some of us can go get it and bring it here?"
Sunset blinked, looking at Flash. "Wait, what?"
Flash shrugged. "Look...I didn't get what Sonata was going through until just now," he said. "I mean, after this morning...this morning was pretty messed up, yeah, but I get it now. I get all of it."
Sonata gasped happily. "You mean...?"
"You can stay," Flash said. "At least until you can find someplace better to go, get yourself kinda put together and get on with your life." He stood up, jamming his hands in his pockets. "I mean, it sounds like you just want a clean start, we've got a guest room, I'm sure I can smooth this over with Mom and Dad..."
Sonata jumped up and threw her arms around Flash, giggling happily. "Oh thankyouthankyouthankyou!" she gushed. "I won't be a burden or anything, I promise!" She kissed him on the cheek. "Wow, sleeping with you may be the best thing that ever happened to me!"
Sunset's eyes widened. Pinkie's hair deflated.
The temperature in the room plummeted.
"Wait," Twilight said softly. "What?"