//------------------------------// // Am I A Failure? // Story: No Pony Is Perfect // by Game-BeatX14 //------------------------------// No Pony Is Perfect By Game-BeatX14 Soarin sat underneath a small wooden pavilion at Ponyville central park. There was nopony else around, leaving him to wallow alone with his thoughts, and nothing but the sound of pelting rain beating his eardrums. Lightning flashed in the distance. The wind howled, and he shivered from the biting cold gusts. His wings ached from not being used for nearly a week… He couldn’t bear to fly anymore. Self-doubt and depression were eating away at his core. How could I have let this happen? Usually, he took pride in learning from his mistakes, moving on and becoming a better pony in the process. But sometimes, those mistakes could have profound impacts that simply had no good way of looking at them. They could cause you to lose more than you would ever gain from experience. And in some rare cases, mistakes and the events that followed could destroy some of the most fragile, intangible feelings that a pony has: Like confidence. Soarin mentally parsed through the events that had occurred one week prior. It had been an air show just like any other. The Wonderbolts were performing stunt formations to entertain the town for a special event, and everything went perfectly fine at first. But at some point, things took a turn for the worse. He wasn’t sure what had caused such a poor lapse in judgement. All he did know, is that his life would never be the same again. “Everyone, pull up for the next loop!” Spitfire commanded. And thus, everypony started to ascend at a fourty-five degree angle. All except for Soarin, who started to climb only twenty-five degrees by mistake. Such an error during a slower paced, casual training session would generally be brushed aside, but this was a stunt show. The entire team was packed so tightly together, that his slight miscalculation caused him to slam into Fleetfoot’s head as she rose from beneath him at the correct angle. The next few seconds were a blur. Upon impact, Fleetfoot was thrown to the side, and Soarin spun out of control, slamming into Spitfire and Blaze as well. The entire team seemed to explode outwards in an unorganized ball of pegasi still drilling through the air at speeds over one hundred miles an hour. Some team members got their wings bumped and bruised during the collisions. Spitfire was the first to recover, and spun her body around to see what was happening. But by the time she could fully process the sight in front of her, Fleetfoot, Blaze and Fire Streak were all dropping out of the sky, presumably unable to flap their wings properly from injury or even pure shock. There was no time to react. The stunt was meant to be performed low to the ground so the town ponies below could get the best view possible. This left just seconds before the three team members crashed into the earth, tumbling head over hoof and tearing up the dirt. The crowd erupted into cries of worry. As per the Wonderbolts protocol, there was a medical team on standby very close. They rushed over, bringing stretchers and assessing the damages. By Celestia’s grace, nopony had suffered any major injuries, but it was still a rather nerve-wracking scene to witness. Soarin and Spitfire both landed next to their badly bruised teammates at the same time. The speechless, perturbed stallion would never forget the look of worry and anger on his commander’s face. “I’m sorry… I’m so, so sorry…” Spitfire turned her head down and shook in utter disappointment. She didn’t plan to let this one slide without consequences. The next day, Soarin and Spitfire paid a quick visit to the Ponyville hospital. According to the doctors, their teammates would recover relatively quickly, having suffered only some minor wing fractures and cuts. It was a good thing Pegasi had naturally resilient bodies. Fleetfoot, Blaze and Fire Streak seemed frustrated with him, but ultimately spared him any excess grief during the visit. The team knew Soarin would never intentionally hurt anypony like that. Crashes were not unheard of throughout the extensive history of the Wonderbolts. Unfortunately, the somewhat relieving news and sympathetic reactions did not make Spitfire any less upset. After returning back to the training facility, she called him into her office, her pupils drilling into his soul as he entered. “Alright Soarin... Now that we know our teammates are okay, I need to ask you something.” He couldn’t utter a word. Spitfire’s expression was beaming with anger. The anxious stallion knew what was coming, but deep down he also knew it was well deserved. His superior looked like she was about to lose her mind. “What the HELL were you thinking?! Soarin, were you even paying attention at all?!” He gulped. “Spitfire, I- “ “I don’t want to hear it! We went over this routine a thousand times until everypony had it memorized. And somehow, you were the only one to mess it up, knocking three of our wing mates out of the sky in the process. You’re lucky they didn’t get seriously hurt!” “I-I’m so sorry…” Spitfire rolled her eyes. “You can apologize all you want. But…” She grabbed a document from her desk, signed it and held it up for Soarin to see. To his dismay, it was a termination form. “That isn’t going to change the fact that you are no longer a member of this team.” Soarin couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He never imagined one day he would be fired for a single mistake. The intense gravity of the situation suddenly took hold of his thoughts. “What? You’re letting me go just like that?” “I am absolutely, one hundred percent terminating your contract and having you replaced with a more competent flyer. No way am I trusting you to fly with my team after this mess.” Soarin’s eye twitched. Part of him felt like it was well deserved punishment, but it didn’t change the fact that being a Wonderbolt was his job and his income. He couldn’t afford to let it slip away so easily. Being laid off certainly wasn’t something he was prepared for, neither financially nor psychologically. “You can’t just kick me off the team for one screw up! Look, I’m incredibly regretful about what happened, and I want nothing more than to make sure Fleetfoot, Misty and Blaze safely recover.” Spitfire tapped her pen repeatedly, squinting at him with contempt. “Listen, Soarin. Can I tell you something? Something that will probably hurt your feelings?” He took slight offense to her derogatory tone. “What are you trying to get at here?” Spitfire took a deep breath, preparing herself to vent her frustrations that had been festering inside for so long. “This isn’t the only mistake. You’ve always been a horrible, reckless flyer who overestimates himself, and I’ve got the log books to prove it. Every crash, every failed stunt, I keep careful track of them.” She reached across her desk and opened up a thick binder, and started flipping through to the necessary pages of data. “Guess how many infractions Fleetfoot has?” “I don’t know.” “Three! In the past five years. Now guess how many you have?” Soarin mentally prepared himself. He hoped the number wouldn’t be too high, but judging by her tone, it most certainly was. “How many?” “Twelve! That’s four times as many offenses. You are extremely fast and train hard, but get distracted way too much, and judging by yesterday’s little event I severely question your ability to follow instructions. I mean, did you even listen to me? First loop, fourty-five degree ascension. Second loop, twenty-five degree ascension. And your backwards-ass brain mixed them up. Is it truly that difficult to memorize a few angles?!” She slammed her hooves on the desk in frustration, beaming at him and waiting for a response. Soarin’s ears flattened against his head. I’m not going to deny that I’ve made some mistakes, but if you’re going to sit here and berate me- “ She cut him off. “Does this team mean anything to you? How do you think I feel, working so hard to organize these events, coaching everyone and training until my legs feel like they’re about to fall off, and then you mess it up?” Soarin tried to stay calm. He noticed his captain now seemed more concerned with the image of the Wonderbolts, rather than just the condition of their teammates. He formulated a simple, yet deeply true reply. “I work hard too, Spitfire, and you know it.” She developed a strange, disparaging look on her face. “Yeah, and that’s what concerns me the most. You train more than anypony else. So tell me then, why do you make more mistakes than every other Wonderbolt? With your training schedule I would expect nothing but perfection from you. Thought apparently, some ponies can’t get it right no matter how much they practice.” Soarin shifted nervously, unsure of how to respond to such demeaning remarks. “Why are you being so condescending to me?” “Let me answer that for you. Because you’re a failure, that’s why! A disorganized, subpar flyer who can’t get his shit straight.” She growled. Soarin gritted his teeth. He couldn’t understand why she was being so hateful towards him, but he tried to take the higher ground. He wasn’t going to stoop down to her level. “I understand that you’re angry, but all I ask is that you take some time to reconsider before you lay me off. This job is all I have...” Spitfire rolled her eyes again. She seemed more irritated with every passing second. “I know that. Why do you think I’ve left you on the team for so long?” Soarin winced at her subtle implication. “H-have you been keeping me employed out of pity?” She simply raised an eyebrow at him. “Trust me Soarin, this has been a looong time coming. I have limited patience for ponies like you who have a tendency to make haphazard missteps at the most crucial times.” He put his hoof down, now taking a slightly more defensive stance. “I feel like the blunders I make are far outweighed by the success I’ve helped bring to the team. You never acknowledge when I do something right, but the minute I screw up you hound me over it. It’s incredibly frustrating and discouraging.” Spitfire gave him an irked glare. “You know, there’s an easy solution to that. Stop making dumb mistakes, and maybe you’ll earn a bit more respect. Am I supposed to reward mediocrity? Trying your hardest means nothing if you’re just terrible, and a danger to others. Swallow your pride and get over yourself!” Soarin felt his blood pressure rise. “Have you ever considered that your attitude might be part of the problem? I could focus infinitely better if you weren’t so stressful and unforgiving to be around. Not to mention that this job is already taxing enough to begin with.” Spitfire was getting tired of arguing. She got up from her chair, approaching him slowly and with contempt. She pushed forward, grabbed him and pinned his shoulders against the wall, glaring daggers at him. It was rare that Soarin felt so intimidated by a mare, but Spitfire had a way of getting under his skin. She began to speak with cold precision. “I don’t ever want to see you here again… I’m not changing my mind, and I’m not going to apologize for putting you in your place. Because guys like you, can’t seem to grasp when they just don’t cut it!” Her tone grew more aggressive with every sentence. Soarin flinched from her agitated inflection. “You crash into teammates, put their safety at risk, cause us to lose competitions, and then have the audacity to insist that I’m the problem?! That I’m just being irrational and I should give you another chance? All because you have too much pride to admit that you’re just a total klutz, and an erratic flyer with no coordination? Well let me make it clear. You’re an embarrassment to team! And I will never let an incompetent washout like you sway my judgement. So why don’t you go back home and consider finding a new pastime. Because you aren’t cut out to be a professional flyer! Do you understand?!” She let go of his hooves and backed off, breathing heavily. There was a long, awkward silence between them. The petrified stallion was at a loss for words, as he slumped back against the wall. Everything he had ever worked for seemed to come crashing down on his shoulders, her words stinging like a needle. His ears drooped, and his lip quivered. Soarin felt a lump forming in his throat. He couldn’t breathe. His fate had been sealed; there was no recovering from this. Spitfire simply stared at him, with cold, unwavering eyes. It was at that moment that Soarin reluctantly got up and anxiously left the office, not even turning back to say a word. Spitfire closed her eyes, taking a relieved breath. “Some ponies just can’t handle the truth…” And so he sat. Alone, in the rain. He didn’t want to lie around at home anymore. It made him feel depressed, behind surrounded by all his Wonderbolts posters and memorabilia, reminding him of a life he no longer had. He needed to get away from it all. Soarin hadn’t spoken to another pony all week… He was single, and had nobody else to comfort him. For the first time in a long while, he began to feel a bitter resentment for all the ponies who had significant others to support and encourage them, while he was left to trudge through his trials and tribulations all by himself. His teammates hadn’t even contacted him once since he was laid off. His whole life was starting to feel bleak and empty, with no hope left. Spitfire’s words played over and over in his head… He was a washout, and a failure. His stomach growled, but he was too tired to walk home and find something to eat. Unbeknownst to Soarin, the park happened to be within view of a certain bakery. Sugarcube corner had a direct line of sight to where he was sitting. Inside, a cheerful pink pony stopped what she was doing to look out the window. She noticed a sad looking pegasus staring at ground, looking like he had given up on life. The sight troubled her, and she knew something had to be done. “Pinkie? Are those sugar cookies almost ready?” Mrs. Cake asked. “Not yet… I need to go take a look at something. I’ll be right back, ok?” Pinkie burst out the door and ran through the stormy weather, reaching the park rather quickly. As she approached, the blue stallion glanced up at her, his eyes red from lack of sleep. “Hello? Mister, are you okay?” Soarin turned his head. She noticed the distinct style of his mane, and it was only then that Pinkie Pie realized who he was. “Wait a minute, aren’t you in the Wonderbolts? I’ve seen you before.” Distant thunder crackled. Soarin barely moved. “Not anymore, I’m not...” He muttered weakly. Pinkie knew something was horribly wrong. She had never seen a pony so despondent, and so emotionless before. From what she could tell, he was a very strong and capable pegasus. She wondered what could have possibly happened to make him act this way. “Soarin, what’s wrong? Why are you sulking out here in the storm by yourself?” “Oh, you know. Just sitting here rethinking my life, since apparently I’m not cut out for team flying...” “What do you mean?” Pinkie asked, somewhat confused. Soarin glanced up at her with a very hesitant expression. “Were you at the Wonderbolts show when those three ponies got knocked out of the sky last week? Because, that was my fault…” Pinkie gasped, suddenly piecing together what was going on. She indeed remembered it. The whole town had been there. “Y-You got fired for that?” She stammered, realizing how devastating that must have been for him. Soarin nodded his head slowly. Pinkie tried to cheer him up. “Soarin, it’s ok. Everypony makes mistakes. I saw you rush to their sides the minute they hit the ground. You did everything you could.” The depressed stallion didn’t seem to be phased by by her reassurance. “It wasn’t just that… Spitfire called me into her office and had a discussion with me afterwards about my history on the team.” He sighed in deep thought, and she waited to let him continue. “Pinkie, do you think I’m a failure?” She seemed taken aback. “What? No, of course not. Why would you even ask that?” Soarin bit his lip, and stared at her. Pinkie could sense his unease. A single tear escaped from his eyes. “Did Spitfire say hurtful things to you?” She asked with a hint of concern. He sighed. “I guess you could say that… Though, she had every right to.” He muttered. Pinkie Pie couldn’t bear to let him remain like this. Now that she knew the source of the problem, she couldn’t back away. Soarin was hurt and needed her help. “What did she say?” Soarin’s ears folded backwards, and his mouth turned into a slight, uncomfortable frown. He seemed unable to speak. In an effort to help him relax, Pinkie approached him, and touched her hoof gently to his chest. He couldn’t help but smile ever so slightly at how friendly and warm she felt, overwhelmingly opposite to how Spitfire’s cold hooves had pressed against his shoulders before. It was unreal how different the two mares were. “Soarin, I need you to let it all out for me. Tell me what she said. Sometimes it’s the only way to confront your feelings.” Soarin gulped, recalling the tirade Spitfire had thrown at him earlier in the week. “S-she said I’m an embarrassment to the team... A total incompetent klutz with no coordination, and told me to quit flying and never come back… It’s over for me.” Pinkie nearly gasped. “That’s terrible!” She blurted. Soarin teared up a bit more. He hiccupped as he began to speak between uneasy sobs. “M-maybe she was right… I was never as good *hic* as I thought. My whole career only lasted as long as it did out of pity!” He put his head down, wailing in despair as he started to break down. “I’ve w-worked so hard my whole life, but nothing *hic* is ever good enough... I’m just a lost cause who doesn’t know his *hic* place, and my teammates got hurt because of my stupidity…” Soarin heaved, allowing the pent-up doubt and stress from the past week to gush out in the form of tears. Pinkie leaned over and embraced him in a big hug, nuzzling him lightly. Soarin continued sobbing a bit more, until he finally ran out of energy. Pinkie put her hooves on his shoulders, and smiled warmly, trying her best to comfort the emotional pegasus. “Having dedication is more important than anything Soarin, even if things don’t work out in the end. You gave it your best every day, and that’s the mark of a true winner.” Soarin sniffled a bit more, finally starting to feel a bit of relief. “Thank you, Pinkie…” She sat down next to him, wrapping her hoof around his body and pulling him close. “I’ve got an idea. Maybe you could take a break and try other things until you feel confident about flying again. We’ve got a position open at Sugarcube corner for an assistant baker. It’s far less stressful than what you’ve been going through in the Wonderbolts. Why don’t you come home with me so you can rest, and we can arrange something? You’ve had a long week.” Soarin perked up at her offer. He had no real interest in baking, but it sounded far more uplifting than going back home and moping around again. “Really?” “Of course. A pony in need is always welcome at the cubical corner of creative creamy confections!” Soarin thought about her words for a moment. “What an amazingly accurate alliteration, Pinkie.” He grinned. She giggled from his response, and he laughed in return. Pinkie loved how the simplest jokes could bring the biggest smiles. “Just promise me one thing Soarin.” “What is it, Pinkie?” She smiled, staring into his eyes. “Don’t you ever let Spitfire tear you down like that. Everypony makes plenty of mistakes, even her. She just doesn’t want to admit it.” The following days were some of the most life-changing times of his life. Every day, Pinkie woke him up and encouraged him to try baking something new, taking the time to walk him through the steps. First, they started off with simple recipes like chocolate chip cookies, gradually moving on to more complex cakes and pastries. As Soarin quickly discovered, he wasn’t too bad at baking. But he felt as though much of it had to do with the relaxed atmosphere of the little corner shop. It felt so inspiring to work with somepony as cheerful and supportive as Pinkie. There were no brutal training sessions; no strict instructions. Pinkie was very lenient with letting him experiment and change up the ingredients to create a new taste for conventional bakery goods. It was such a contrast to the last several years of being under constant stress in the Wonderbolts, where everything was so regimented and tense. He suddenly realized just how demanding his old job had been, giving him a deep appreciation for his current bakery internship. As Soarin put the finishing touches on a large triple layer cake, he briefly stopped and turned to his new mentor. The mare who had who had quite possibly saved him from going off the deep end. “Pinkie?” “Yeah Soarin?” The newly reformed pegasus reached out and embraced Pinkie in a strong hug. “Thank you for helping me believe in myself. You’re truly somepony special.” “And thank you for helping me bake such awesome cakes! I can’t wait to see Celestia’s face when she eats this one! Quick, write your name on it with frosting.” Soarin used a tube of blue frosting and spelled out his name on the top of the cake, right below Pinkie’s. While a simple cake didn’t hold the same amount of impressiveness compared to his aerial maneuvers, it still made him smile with satisfaction. “Oh, by the way Soarin?” “Yeah?” “Do you feel like flying again yet? Because my friend Rainbow Dash has been looking for someone to train with. She’s always been a huge fan of you. Maybe you could pay her a visit and give it another go? I’m sure she would be ecstatic to fly alongside one of the greatest former Wonderbolts on the planet!” Soarin held a hoof up to his head, scratching and thinking. “Oh yeah, I remember her… Sure! Flying with somepony different might be a nice change of pace.” Pinkie smiled, glad she had succeeded in bringing his motivation back. “Aw yeah, there we go! I knew you couldn’t stay on the ground forever. Flying is in your blood!” She paused for a moment. “Just don’t knock her out of the sky, please.” Pinkie deadpanned. Soarin stared at her for several moments. Pinkie tried her best to hold a serious poker face, but naturally she wasn’t very good at it. Her mouth slowly curled back into a stupid, strained smirk, and Soarin burst out laughing with her. Her character was infectious, in a heartwarming way. For the first time in years, he began to feel genuinely happy. All thanks to one silly pink mare with a heart of gold.