Stretching out across the horizon is an expanse of dust, larger than the Saddle Arabian desert, but flatter and less interesting. Smalls rocks lie scattered across the landscape, punctuated occasionally by a larger rock. In some places, there are even two or three larger rocks together. Nestling within this terrain is a jagged metallic object which on closer inspection reveals itself to be a pod, its skin is a mismatched patchwork of riveted panels. With a dull clunk, an airlock door on the side of the pod wearily begins to open.
"It's jammed. Isn't that just typical?" Doctor Whooves huffed. He wrenched the cover from the control mechanism and surveyed the wires underneath. "No this won't do, I mean who even designed this?"
"You did," said Twilight,
The Doctor looked almost as though this information was a revelation to him. "Yes, well you can't always expect perfection all of the time. Just requires a bit of thought". He studied the inner workings of the mechanism further, "ah, looks like the transistor has overloaded causing a discharge on the primary circuit which has overheated and become fused with the casing. In theory we just need to...", he stood back and gave the door a kick. It immediately started to move again. "See, that was effortless. No need to get stressed,"
"I'm not stressed," Twilight replied,
"Good".
The airlock door slammed fully open and each of the four ponies stepped out. A light breeze touched Twilight's face. She gasped, savouring the feeling of the ground under her hooves. Out here there were no clanging pipes or clammy bunkrooms to distract her. If she closed her eyes she could imagine herself back at home, standing on her balcony, gazing across Ponyville. Involuntarily, Twilight started to unfurl her wings.
"Right," said Doctor Whooves, "Derpy, you carry out an aerial surveillance covering an area of about one square mile and I will perform a survey from the ground. We'll reconvene at four hundred hours.
Derpy stared at the Doctor blankly.
"Fly around for five minutes then come back and tell me if you see anything interesting,"
"Why didn't you say so?" she replied gleefully, before taking off, the Doctor jogging after her,
"Well I guess it's just us then?" said Trixie, but as she turned to the space occupied by Twilight, she found it was empty.
In the distance, a smooth purple shape swirled across the horizon. Trixie gazed at the spectacle with a sigh. She drifted into a weary trance for the next few minutes while Twilight spiralled overhead. When she finally landed abruptly by Trixie's side it caught her by surprise.
"You seem to have a lot of energy all of a sudden,"
"I know, it's just so good to be able to stretch my wings again. It reminds me of when I first learned how to fly. I remember Rainbow Dash said..." Twilight fell mournfully silent, staring out across the barren landscape.
"You really do miss Equestria don't you?" said Trixie, kicking a stone along the ground.
"I keep thinking, there are so many things I wanted to do, but never got round to. There's a six-storey library in Manehattan I always planned to visit. Imagine that,"
"Doesn't sound like a very good library if there are only six stories in it,"
"No, I mean it has six floors," Twilight explained,
"Six floors? Well what did they do with the rest of the space, build a giant cafe or something?"
Twilight could see this line of discussion was going nowhere. "Don't you have anything you'd like to do, if you could go back to Equestria? What about your magic shows?"
"Oh, they weren't going so well," Trixie replied thoughtfully, "you know how it is with show business; one minute you're up, the next...", she waved her hoof in a theatrical gesture to illustrate the point, "still, I suppose the rock farm would probably have me back".
Unsure how to reply to this, Twilight changed the subject again. "You know, it wasn't very nice of the Doctor to scare us like that,"
"Yes," Trixie snarled, standing up, "I wasn't scared though. I was just humouring him to see how far he would go, but you're right. It wasn't nice of him to scare you like that,"
"We should say something,"
"Or, we could get revenge," Trixie's eyes glinted mischievously, "a little word of advice never attempt to trick a trickster".
A concerned expression fell across Twilight's face, but before she could say anything they were interrupted by Derpy, hovering overhead.
"Come quickly," she said, "the Doctor's found something".
Doctor Whooves and the others formed a circle around a brown crate, half buried in the ground. They each stood waiting to see who would speak first.
"Whoever designed this must have an intelligence far in advance of our own," said the Doctor,
"Which isn't saying much," Trixie commented,
"They obviously wanted us to find it. That's why they've disguised it in Equestrian materials. I suggest we take it back to the pod to examine the contents,"
"Is that safe?" said Derpy,
"Of course, why wouldn't it be?" He peered thoughtfully at the crate, "we could do with some mode of conveyance to assist us though. There's a trolley back inside the pod",
"I have telekinesis," Twilight reminded him.
But the Doctor was already sprinting away into the dust, "We're dealing with an alien artifact. The contents might be volatile when exposed to magic. Muffins".
"Somehow I doubt that," muttered Twilight, "Derpy".
The mare, who was already a few paces away, stopped in her tracks. "What is it, I have to help the Doctor?"
"I just want to ask you something? When the pod first crashed, was there a lot of damage?"
"There was damage all over when we did the inspection; the cockpit, the midsection, the service corridors, and that door to the cupboard under the stairs has never shut properly since. Still, the Doctor says any landing you can walk away from is a good one,"
"Of course the greatest landings are the ones where you can reuse your spacecraft afterwards," said Trixie,
Twilight continued, "what about the outer shell?"
Derpy's face contorted and her pupils drifted further apart as she concentrated. "I seem to remember, there was a hole in the cargo bay, so we had to seal that area off as a precaution. Why do you ask?"
"No reason". After waiting until Derpy had gone, Twilight leaned in close to Trixie, "well we know where that crate came from, and it has nothing to do with aliens,"
"You mean it fell out of the cargo bay during the crash? You really think the Doctor would overlook something like that?"
Twilight gazed at her with an eyebrow raised.
"Oh what am I saying, of course he would,"
"We have to tell him".
Twilight was about to follow Derpy to the pod, but Trixie held out her hoof to stop her. "Wait," she said. The malicious glow from earlier had returned, "what if we don't tell him,"
"What?"
"Think about it, it would be like the best prank ever,"
"I don't know," said Twilight, shaking her head, "it doesn't seem right,"
"Come on. It was you who wanted revenge, wasn't it?"
"No," Twilight gasped, "I never said that,"
"But it'll be so good. Do it for me, please". Trixie gave her best pathetically, irresistibly adorable expression. She could see her target was being worn down, despite the grimace she now wore, "haven't you ever wanted to do something mischievous, just once? We're at the end of the universe, who's going to know?"
After a long, defeated pause, Twilight let out a sigh. "Okay, but just this once,"
Trixie grinned. "Of course".
Twilight flinched and Trixie covered her ears from the piercing squeaking sound. Doctor Whooves and Derpy were wheeling the crate on a trolley into the midsection, floor plates rattling beneath them.
"You must forgive the noise," said the Doctor, "I haven't had need of this since the third great parasprite uprising,"
"What?" cried Trixie "I can't hear you,"
The noise stopped at last. "Just think," the Doctor gasped, trying to catch his breath, "we're about to make contact, with a new, alien," he took another breath, "life form".
"What did he say?" Trixie shouted back, hooves still over her ears. Twilight tapped her. "Oh," she said, removing them.
"What we require now is some apparatus with which to open it".
Twilight sighed, "let me try first". Derpy and the Doctor stepped out of the way, as she came around the side of the trolley. "Applejack was always more co-ordinated at this than I am". Positioning herself carefully at just the right distance, she kicked out with her back legs. The crate burst open on impact, its contents spilling out. Twilight smiled with satisfaction. "It's just a simple case of calculating the optimum velocity and geometry really".
The Doctor moved quickly to examine the plethora of trinkets now strewn across the trolley. He picked up a rectangular piece of creamy fabric with dark blotches and ran it over each of his hooves. then produced a magnifying glass to inspect it further. "Fascinating. It appears to be constructed from absorbent fibres, slightly abrasive in texture. Imagine what applications this could have in an alien civilisation,"
"I think that's a towel," said Derpy,
"And a very dirty one," commented Twilight, screwing up her nose,
"Yes," cried the Doctor, his face lighting up. He slammed the towel down "of course. You know what this means?"
The others each should there heads.
"In some parts of the universe, towels are regarded as having great psychological value. The aliens must have deemed us very worthy to bestow a gift like this upon us,"
"So what else is in there?" Trixie grinned, nudging Twilight. "Maybe the aliens have left some more gifts for us,"
The Doctor began tugging at what looked like the end of a scarf.
"Careful Doc," warned Derpy,
As he pulled, it seemed like the garment was never-ending. More and more of it wound out onto the floor, decorated in strips of green, yellow, red and purple. Even Trixie and Twilight stood in awe of it.
"Just picture their anatomy," said the Doctor, "they must have huge necks". He demonstrated with a dramatic gesture.
"Didn't you used to have a scarf like that?" Derpy pointed out.
Something else had now drawn Twilight's attention. She dug frantically underneath some more loose items of clothing to uncover a stack of books. The cover of the book visible on top of the pile was torn and creased, and it contained an equally mauled bookmark. "Studies in temporal linearity". Before she had even finished reading the title, Doctor Whooves had snatched the book from her levitation field.
"Great whickering stallions, I remember this," he cried, opening the first page. He shook his head, "there are number of inaccuracies in Hoofton's work but some observations on sequential time are rather interesting. As it happens I never found enough sequential time to finish reading it, then I mislaid my original copy. You know, busy life, so many things to keep track off,"
"Then how come you slept in all afternoon yesterday?" said Derpy,
"Just re-calibrating neural passageways". The Doctor flicked to the page where the bookmark was wedged. "Interesting. This is the exact same page I was up to, now there's a coincidence". He paused for a moment, in thought. "Hey wait a minute..."
Trixie and Twilight looked at each other.
"It's the aliens, they knew, of course they did". The Doctor jumped into the air ecstatically. "They know everything, I don't know how but they know. Real life aliens, after all this time". He disappeared into the corridor, joyful tones echoing behind him as he continued to leap and shout and dance.
Twilight could see that Trixie was struggling to hold back her amusement. She could barely suppress it herself. Within moments both of them burst out in a fit of laughter.
"One of us should really tell him," said Twilight,
"Go on then," Trixie laughed, "I won't stop you".
Across the room Derpy had got herself tangled up in the Doctor's scarf and was wriggling around in a futile effort to break free. Twilight shook her head and attempted to compose herself.
"I was thinking," she said, once she had recovered, "when we get back to Equestria, if we get back, instead of going back to the rock farm, maybe you could stay with me at the castle for a while, if you like. There's plenty of space. I know you're kind of annoying sometimes, most of the time, well nearly all the time, but we do seem to make a good team".
A smile swept across Trixie's face, from ear to ear. She was about to hug Twilight, then she checked herself. "Well, I'll think about it".
Twilight smiled. "Anyway I'd better lend Derpy a hoof". The pony in question was now wrestling on the floor hopelessly.
The Doctor ran back in. He stood in a dramatic pose and cleared his throat. "Tonight, the first of Doctober, shall be marked in history, for we are the first to ever successfully make contact with an alien civilisation. It is a great responsibility which I intend to carry with dignity and gratitude".
Twilight shook her head as she went to assist the unfortunate mare. It was probably just as well none of them had the real responsibility of representing Equestrian intelligence to an alien species, she pondered. It would probably be rather embarrassing.