December 17
I was still kinda drunk in the morning, and when I woke up I really had to pee, so I staggered over to the bathroom and human toilets are really dumb especially when you've had too much to drink the night before. I wish our hotel bathroom had had a urinal in it, 'cause I think that would have been a lot easier to use.
I wasn't at all ready to get up so I got back in bed and curled up with Cayenne and Aquamarine and then I fell back asleep for a bit until I heard a portable telephone ringing, and it was Cayenne's.
Her horn lit and it took her a couple of tries before she found her telephone and answered it and she was doing more listening than talking and she set her telephone back down and said that our helpers were monsters for wanting to get us up so early in the morning after we'd had a good night out.
Aquamarine said that she felt fine although she was hoarse from all the cheering she'd done last night. And she got up and started coffee and then turned on the shower and threatened to drag us both by our tails to the shower if we didn't make it on our own and I think she would have, so we got in the shower and she'd left it ice-cold to help wake us up. And me and Cayenne both took turns swearing at her but we didn't mean it, and the cold water worked and I was feeling alert at least by the time that she decided to turn the warm water on for us.
We had time to talk in the shower and she told us about how the Orlando Magic had won the game last night and it had been kind of a close game all the way through. And she said that there were enough people there when they cheered the air shook, and Mister Salvatore and Mister Barrow had had a great time, too, and they'd even managed to get her to meet some of the players which was really neat, and she'd also gotten a short interview on television from a woman named Kyle Petty.
And we told her about our night, and when we were done with our shower me and Cayenne shared a cup of coffee while Aquamarine made another cup. I liked the coffee maker that Aric had better than the one the hotel had, 'cause it could make twelve cups at once and this one would only make one and if you didn't do it exactly right it wouldn't make anything at all.
Cayenne had some aspirin in her bag and she gave me a couple which also helped. And then Aquamarine said that we could share the second cup of coffee, too, but that didn't seem fair so we let her have it and Cayenne started a third and then got in a fight with the coffee maker when it didn't want to produce coffee.
We had to pack up our bags, 'cause we were going to be staying at Walt Disney World for the rest of our vacation. Luckily, I hadn't gotten that much out so it didn't take me too long. Cayenne was a little too tired to care about how she packed, so she just shoved everything she had in her bags and Aquamarine had to sit on it so she could fasten it shut.
Then when we'd all gotten groomed and packed we went downstairs to meet our helpers and we went to Waffle House for breakfast again and that helped us wake up the rest of the way. Cayenne had too many eggs and started farting before we'd even left the restaurant and Mister Salvatore said that he had been expecting a rainbow and had gotten death and she hit him with her tail and then we rode in the Suburban with the windows down all the way to the airboats, 'cause the eggs had gotten to me, too.
We drove back along the 50 road until we got to the airboat rental store that had their sign painted on the roof, and Mister Salvatore said that he was glad that the boats were open, and both me and Cayenne told him that we were sorry. And he said that it was Miss Parker and Miss Cherilyn's fault for letting us drink so much last night and I didn't think that was fair, 'cause we'd done it on our own and we were old enough to know better.
When we went inside there was a pig who came up to greet us and he oinked at us and Aquamarine oinked back and then nuzzled him, and then a white bird landed in my mane, and they were all pets that roamed around the store. Mister Salvatore seemed a little bit annoyed by them, but I thought that they were nice. And then we met Captain Ed, who was our airboat pilot, and he took us out back and told us a little bit about it and what we needed to know to stay safe. We had to wear life jackets, which are really puffy vests, and it took them a little while to find ones that fit us well. I didn't like mine that much, 'cause it kept my wings pinned against my barrel and if the boat crashed and sank I thought I'd be better off floating free, but it was a rule and we had to follow it. And we were also supposed to wear earmuffs to keep the sound down and also so that Captain Ed could talk to us, and those weren't made for a pony at all and we had a really hard time getting them to fit on and they were really uncomfortable, too, and I hoped that the airboat ride would be worth it.
The airboat was a flat-bottomed dory, with a big propeller mounted in a cage so that nobody would fall in by mistake and get chopped up, and Captain Ed had a raised-up seat that gave him a better view, while we had to stay down a little bit lower. And we all got seats right in the front, while our helpers sat behind us.
The engine on the airboat was kinda loud. So it was a good thing that we had our earmuffs on, 'cause otherwise it might have hurt our hearing. And he drove the boat out of the dock and went down the channel and everything seemed normal until he skimmed over some grass and I braced my hooves 'cause I thought that we were going to crash, but the boat had a really shallow draft and it didn't even bump as it went over the almost-land.
We drove along for a while across water and little lumps of land and scared off a bunch of birds who were trying to eat their breakfast, and then we got to a place where there were trees in the water and they had roots that stuck up above the water kinda like stilts.
Captain Ed slowed down the engines so that he could tell us about the swamp. He said some of it was man-made, ‘cause Orlando had needed a place to put their treated wastewater so they made a swamp, which was also a good habitat for all the different kinds of animals who liked living there. He said that further north, there were even monkeys living by the river and nobody knew how they’d gotten there. I would have liked to see them but our airboat didn’t go that far. Some people thought that maybe they had escaped from a circus or a zoo, and other people thought that maybe they were pets that had been set free.
We went a little bit further and he slowed down again and pretty soon the alligators were swimming around near our boat and none of us liked that too much, 'cause it didn't seem like it would be too hard for them to jump out of the water and get one of us, and we'd probably be a tasty snack for an alligator which was not how I wanted to end my time on Earth. But everybody else on the boat liked looking at them and I guess they weren’t afraid that the alligators might jump on the boat and eat them. Maybe alligators didn’t eat people.
When we got back to the docks, we had a chance to meet a baby alligator and Captain Ed said that we could even hold it if we wanted to. I didn't want to, 'cause I didn't want to get bitten, but Aquamarine did hold it and so did all of our helpers and then I thought maybe I was being a bit of a coward so I held it, too. Aquamarine said that Pinkie Pie, who lives in Ponyville, has a pet alligator of her own, who is called Gummy, 'cause he doesn't have any teeth.
My ears still hurt a little bit from the earmuffs, 'cause they'd pushed them down, and I saw that Cayenne was twitching hers a little bit. And when we walked back to the Suburban, Aquamarine reached up with a hind hoof and scratched her ear.
Plus my feathers were a little bit matted-down from the lifejacket so instead of getting right in I stretched my wings out and fluffed them a little bit—it wasn't nearly as good as preening them properly, but it was better, and I thought that maybe if we had to wait at the airport I'd have time to do them right.
We probably could have stayed a little bit longer, but we had to go back to Orlando to get another car, because when Gusty and her helpers came there wouldn't be enough room for everyone in our Suburban. I said that I thought we could crowd in, and Mister Salvatore said that we probably could if we had to but it was more practical to get another vehicle so we wouldn't be as cramped and besides if somepony wanted to do something different than everypony else it would be good to have. And Miss Cherilyn looked at him and asked him if he was going to get something sensible and he said that he had rented the most practical Florida car.
She asked if it was a convertible and he said that she could call it that.
And then we drove back the same way as if we were going to our hotel, but we got off the exit going south on the 527 Road which was also called Orange Street, and that took us through a busy part of Orlando.
There was a building that had lots of rainbow flags on it and big signs and that was the Pulse where this summer a bad man had killed a lot of people there, and I knew about it because Pastor Liz had told me, but I guess Aquamarine didn’t because she asked about it and so Miss Cherilyn told her about it and said that it was being turned into a memorial so that people wouldn’t forget what had happened there.
We drove a little bit further and then stopped at a place called Orlando Jeep Rentals and Miss Cherilyn asked him if this was what he thought a practical vehicle was and he said that the roof folded down so you could be in the sun and it had four wheel drive in case he had to rescue one of us on a beach or in a swamp so of course it was practical. And there was a bright yellow one that said Rubicon on its hood and it had a black roof and me and Aquamarine both liked it the best so he got it and then asked who wanted to ride with him, and so me and Aquamarine both did. We had to wait for a little bit while he figured out how to furl the top and he said that the doors could come off too but he didn't know where to put them.
I thought it was a lot of fun to be in even though we were in the city and that wasn't as nice as being in the country. It was bumpier than the Mustang had been, but it sat higher and so we could see more. And Aquamarine figured out that you could stand up on the seat and hook your hooves over the top bar but we weren't allowed to do that while Mister Salvatore was driving because we might fall out.
We got to go a little bit faster on the 528 Highway which took us to the airport, and when we got there, Mister Salvatore had a special badge for the Jeep and the Suburban so instead of having to park in one of the parking lots like everybody else did, he could park right by the front doors, which was really nice.
We went inside and found the restaurant which was called McCoy's Bar and Grill, and I got a crawfish chowder, 'cause the menu said it was their specialty and it was really good but a little bit messy to eat.
There were lots of restaurants and shops at the airport which there must have also been at the first airport I was at but I was new to Earth and everything was confusing and I'd been as skittish as a yearling so I hadn't paid all that much attention. And there was a hotel in the airport that had rooms that looked over the concourse and it had a big glass ceiling, so it was kind of like a little city in a greenhouse, Aquamarine said. I thought that was strange in Florida, since it was warm and sunshiny, and it might make a lot more sense in Michigan where it was cold and snowy.
They had televisions that showed you when the flights were arriving, and we found Gusty's flight and it said that it was on time and going to go to terminal A, so we wanted to go there.
Our helpers had to show their badges so that they could go to the terminal with us, because normally you weren't supposed to unless you had a ticket on an airplane. And then we got special badges that we could wear on necklaces so that everyone would know that we were allowed in the terminal even without an airplane ticket. And then we had to ride on a tram, which was an elevated train, and it took us along over the roads and a little park-like island in the middle of the concrete which had trees and ponds in it and I asked Mister Salvatore if you were allowed to have picnics there and watch the airplanes and he said that you probably weren't supposed to. I thought that was a shame.
Then the tram got to the terminal building which had covered gangways sticking out that went to the airplanes, and there were a bunch of airplanes all moored at their gates, and they all had their names on their tails. I saw Delta and Spirit and Lufthansa and Jet Blue, but no Frontier which was the airline that Gusty was flying on, 'cause we were still a little bit early and we'd beaten her airplane to the airport.
There were helpful signs that said where all the gates were and so we went to sixteen and they had a little waiting area but nobody was there yet. And there was a big window that looked over the tarmac and we decided that we could see better if we went to the next gate, 'cause with the gangway on our left it would mostly block our view of the airplane.
Mister Barrow came over with us, and we sat in the chairs and pretty soon we started seeing people coming out and preparing for the arrival of her airplane. And then it came off the runway and turned in to the terminal area and when it got close a man with a bright vest like mine walked out and he was holding sticks that looked like stubby lightsabers and he used them to tell the airplane where to go. I had to go all the way up to the window to see him as he backed up, 'cause we were off the ground and he disappeared under the edge of the window.
Then when the airplane was parked men went over and started attaching hoses and wires to it, and a truck with a conveyor belt on its back came over to the belly of the airplane and they opened up a door and started taking baggage out and loading it onto a short train, and on the other side we could see the gangway moving towards the airplane.
So we went back around to the other side to see Gusty, and she came out of the airplane first, followed by her helpers who were Mister Wayne and Miss Russi. And Gusty trotted up to us and nuzzled all of us and the men helpers shook hands while the women helpers hugged each other.
We had to go back to the main atrium to get her luggage, 'cause she had only been allowed to take her saddlebags on the airplane. And she spit out the gum that she'd been chewing which she said was to keep her ears from hurting when she was flying and she said that it helped some. And she'd gotten to sit up in the front in the nice seats and the stewardesses had given her some white wine to drink so she had to pee too, so we stopped at the bathroom before we took the tram back to the main building.
All the luggage arrived on a big conveyor and you had to watch for what was yours and Gusty also got Mister Wayne and Miss Russi's bags too, 'cause she could just pick them up with her magic and set them on the floor and then we went out to the Suburban and Jeep.
She wanted to ride in the Suburban with Cayenne and it was a little bit crowded in there with five helpers so Miss Parker got in the Jeep with us. She said that she was going to keep an eye on Mister Salvatore and make sure that he didn't do anything too reckless, and he said that he wouldn’t, and she said that she'd heard about what had happened on his Jeep tour in Colorado.
We drove out of Orlando and went past SeaWorld which was a zoo for whales, and then we drove to a place called Disney Springs. And it was pretty popular, ‘cause there were lots of cars in the parking lots and they had all sorts of Christmas decorations up. Mister Salvatore said that he was sure they had lots of lights, too, but since it was daytime we couldn’t see them.
We had to put the top up on the Jeep before we went in and Gusty started dancing around on her hooves 'cause she was so excited I thought that she might gallop off before we finished but she didn't.
Miss Russi said that we should burn off a little bit of energy by walking around the nature path, and we had to take a boat to get there. It was called the Sassagoula Steam Boat, but it wasn't a real steam boat. Mister Barrow said that it was just a pontoon boat that was a little bit dressed up. It was still fun, though. It was a lot slower than the airboat had been, but it was quieter, too, and we didn't have to wear life jackets and earmuffs to ride on it.
It took us to the Saratoga Springs Spa and Gusty and Cayenne both wanted to go there and get pampered, and Miss Cherilyn said that we would do that later. And then we went to the Saratoga Springs Nature Path which was kind of a lie, 'cause it was a path around a golf course. But it was really pretty just the same and it did let Gusty work off some of her pent-up energy. I think it was partially nervousness from being on the airplane and also eagerness at seeing Walt Disney World and everything that was there.
I kind of felt bad for her, too, 'cause her school got out really late so she hadn't had enough time for proper goodbyes before she'd left, and I hoped that she'd have time to do that when she got back from vacation.
And then when we got back we did go to the spa and they had all sorts of different kinds of massages that you could get but some of them weren't for ponies, and there was a special deluxe massage that lasted five hours and we didn't have time for that which kind of disappointed Cayenne. I wasn't sure how you could even have a massage that lasted for five hours. I think that they'd run out of things to do before the five hours was up. Gusty said I didn't know anything about fashion.
They only had two people who knew how to massage ponies, so we couldn't all go at once. So me and Aquamarine said that we'd look around and come back after Cayenne and Gusty had had theirs, and then we took the not-a-steamboat back to Disney Springs and walked around to see what was there. They had a restaurant that was on a paddleboat which didn't actually move, and another that had a dinosaur theme which looked really neat. Dinosaurs were kind of like dragons but most of them didn't fly and they couldn't breathe fire, either. And they had a really ornate carousel that we got to ride around on, and a store that sold tea and they had a couple of flavors that you could sample there, but they were in really tiny cups that me and Aquamarine couldn't use, so we had to have Miss Cherilyn help us.
Then we went and took the not-a-steamboat back to the spa for our turn and both Gusty and Cayenne looked really relaxed and smelled really nice, too.
The room smelled like sandalwood and they had some quiet music that was really relaxing and I realized that I'd never gotten a chance to preen my wings right but the man who massaged me did it for me and he put some nice oil in them too to make them all glossy. He had a strange accent that I didn't know and he said that he was from Cuba and he had fled there because it wasn't a nice place especially for a gay man and it was much better in America, but he kind of missed his home sometimes. And then he started massaging my wings and back and he was wonderful and when he was done I was so relaxed I didn't know if I'd be able to get back off the bench again or tuck my wings back up.
We didn't all have to eat at the same place if we didn't want to, so I decided I'd like to go to the Cuban Cafe and Cayenne wanted to, too. Aquamarine went with her helpers to the dinosaur restaurant, and Gusty went to Raglin Road, which she said was a real Irish pub that had been built in Ireland and then brought here on a boat. I thought that probably wasn't true, 'cause it seemed like it would be cheaper to just build it here although human ships were big enough to carry a whole building so maybe it was true.
They had a really good seafood platter that I got which was called Zarzuela de Mariscos and it was more than I could eat, so they gave me the extra in a little box for later. And Cayenne got more food than she could eat, too, so she also got a little box to carry it away in. And they had dancers and Cuban music playing and they went through the restaurant and then brought a line of people in who danced along with them and so we joined them and that was lots of fun.
And then we all met up by the Characters in Flight which was a balloon that you could ride up in. It flew with helium instead of hot air, and it was tied to the ground so it wouldn't get away. Gusty didn't want to ride on that, but the rest of us did. And we had to sign a little paper saying that we knew that balloons could fall out of the sky and then we got in and had a pegasus-eye view of the resort.
It was right around sunset, too, so it was especially pretty.
Then we went to see Cirque du Soleil, which was a troupe of acrobats.
The show started out with a woman sweeping the stage 'cause I guess it had to be clean although I thought they should have done that before the audience sat down. And then the music started and I realized that she was part of the show.
And it was kind of strange, 'cause there were people running around like a man who looked almost like he was on fire and then someone rode a bicycle through the air upside-down and the floor started lifting up taking her with it.
Then the other performers came out, and it was just one amazing act after another. There were wire-walkers and girls in green dresses that threw diabolos up in the air and around to each other, and there were clowns that pretended that they were in space and had water jugs for helmets and they were really funny. And then they had people riding around on bicycles and unicycles and a little Shriner car and a man did a bunch of balancing tricks on a bicycle and then his friend came out with another bicycle and hopped right into the audience with it and he jumped over a man that they'd found in the audience, and he left stage by falling into a smoky pit.
There was a man and a woman who rode into the sky in a door and hung from it and did acrobatics in the air and that was really beautiful. They moved around in ways that I didn't think were even possible and they made it look completely effortless. And when they rode up into the sky big red fabrics came down with people climbing them and using them to fly around on and it was just like he could fly.
They also had acrobats swinging back and forth from trapeezes and that was almost like flying. They'd switch places in midair and tumble around and they were really graceful. They had a big net below them in case they fell, but they never had to use it until the very end when they were done, and then they all took turns diving into the net and then they all hung off the front and dropped off together.
Another group of acrobats bounced off of trampolines, and that was really amazing to see 'cause I don't think I could have moved as gracefully as they did. And then a couple of them flipped off the trampolines and landed on other people's shoulders which was really amazing, and they did a jump where four of them all passed over each other in the center and then at the end everybody came out and bowed and went back off-stage and when the two clowns who had been fighting left the big rock that they'd thrown up into the sky before fell down on the stage.
After the show was over, we all went out and got in the Suburban and the Jeep and drove over to the Contemporary Resort, which was where we'd be staying because it had a monorail that went everywhere. And the monorail went right through it, which was really neat to see.
We had to get special hoof-bands called magic bands that would let us in, and there was a man who took pictures of our cutie marks so that if somebody took our magic band they wouldn't be able to use it. And the humans all got them, too, but since they didn't have cutie marks they had to put their index fingers on a portable telephone because all human fingers are different.
We got two rooms that were right next to each other, and since we had six helpers with us we shared our room with Miss Parker and Miss Russi who each got one bed. They said that Miss Cherilyn could stay with us, too, but she said that there needed to be somebody to keep the boys in line or else they'd be rappelling down the side of the tower by their neckties or something else crazy like that and Miss Russi laughed and said that if she needed backup they'd come right over and help her out.
Gusty didn't mind the height 'cause we were in a big, solid building but she didn't want to go out on the balcony at all because it was a little scary to be that close to the railing. And I wished that I could fly off of it, but I'd been told that I wasn't allowed to fly in Walt Disney World, so I had to settle for just looking over the edge.
We had mostly settled in when they started shooting off fireworks over the park to celebrate the night, and those were really pretty, and we stayed at the window and watched until they were done.