~Tobias POV~
After Jinx... Miki... I don't know anymore... left, me and Discord had a looooooong conversation about what we should do next. In the end we decided that it'd be best if we stopped going all sneaky sneaky cuz it was getting boring already, with the usual rutine being: Steal food, eat, steal another royal treasure, laugh at Sunbutt's anger (which is fun as hell), then go to sleep. We'd been doing that for around 2 months, I think. And now is the time to stand out, and go annoy this 'Elements of Harmony' that Discord told me about. And maybe take some ponies as my pets.
"Alright, but if we want to do that we will have to steal one of the Elements of Harmony itself, but we need you to be able to represent one of the Elements." Discord said in a serious tone.
"Sure thing. Let's see which one represents me!" I said with my usual smile.
"Alright... How about Laughter?"
"Probably not. I mean, I'm a lot better at making people angry then making them laugh" I said with a chuckle which Discord returned.
"Hmm... Generosity?"
"More like Greed."
"Kindness?"
"No way in hell." 'Me? Kind? Nah.'
"What about honesty? You are pretty honest most of the time."
"I lied way too much in my life and tricked too many people to be called honest" 'I mean, I just tricked some ponies into giving me all their money.'
"Ok then... Loyalty?"
"I would say I'm loyal but Graves would strongly disagree." I said while laughing.
"If you say so. The last is Magic."
"Totally me." Discord raised an eyebrow.
"How so?"
"I can use the Magic of the Cards, can teleport where I want, no matter what, and I can make people's belongings magically disappear!" I said with a smirk, to which Discord facepalmed.
"Ah let's just do it... It's not like we have a choice..." Discord said with a sigh.
"Hell yeah!" I said happily. Finally... Some actual fun... "Welp... Time to get myself a tiara" I chuckled at the thought as I teleported away.
~One teleportation later~
I teleported inside the tree house transformed library... This place is so confusing... I let out a sigh of relief at the fact that the ponies weren't here.
"Now... Where would I put a valuable jewelry which can save the world... Hmm..." I started looking around the house. And found a box under the bed... Which contained the tiara... "Are ya' fuckin' kiddin' me? Is this bitch a fuckin' idiot?" I shrugged my shoulders, picked up the tiara and placed a note and a card in it's place.
I teleported away back to Discord
~One teleportation later~
"Got it~" I said cheerfully and put the tiara on my head. "How do I look?" I said with a chuckle.
"Hmm... Not bad..." He made an evil grin... I don't like that face... "I think you'll look better like this." He snapped his fingers and I felt like something was missing...
"Discord..." Then I noticed my voice was way higher than it should be... "Ya'..." My eyes were shining with flame of hatred to which Discord looked a little scared. "Are a fucking genius!" He looked at me confused, only one word coming out of his mouth. "What."
"C'mon! Let's go fuck around the town!" I grabbed his hand and we teleported into town." This will be fun.
~Twilight POV~
After meeting Graves we teleported back to Ponyvile, and to our surprise everything was in chaos... Not the discord kind of chaos, no, worse.
From the sky there was raining... Panties? That is weird... Especially the fact that some ponies were running around grabbing them...
I looked at Graves who had a look that was saying. 'I've seen way too much shit in my life to be moved by something of this level.' Then we heard a shout.
"I AM THE PRETTIEST PRINCESS IN THE WORLD!" We all looked to the voice and saw a weird creature that looked like Graves and that thief Tobias... Only female. And to my surprise she had the element of Magic on her head... WHAT?!
"Wait a minute..." Graves said with an angry tone. "TOBIAS! THAT'S YA' ISN'T IT?! WHY THE FUCK ARE YA' A WOMAN?! GET YAR ASS OVER HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"
"Make me ya' son of a bitch!" Said Tobias laughing like a maniac. To which Graves responded by pulling us that thing he called a 'Shotgun' and started shooting at Tobias.
"Whoa! Careful there! It's almost like ya' wanna kill little me." Tobais said laughing.
"That's cuz I am!" He started shooting again but Tobias teleported away. "Where in tarnation did he go?!" He started running in a direction at what looked like random... Oh dear... Me and the girls started following him
~Graves POV~
'I can't fucking believe it... That fucker Tobias became a woman... WHAT THE FUCK?! Agh I'm still killing that bastard.' I started running to the middle of the town. He's done this kind of shit before. He always goes to the middle of town to show off...
When I arrived there I saw him... or in this case her sitting on a throne made out of... Sigh... Cards... And next to him was a creature that looked like it was made out of random animals put together. It honestly looked like something that came out of Zaun... That fucked up place was full of monsters and crazy fuckers...
"Oh lookie lookie here, Discord! We have a visitor! And it's Mr Graves! What can I, the prettiest princess in the world, do for ya' sweetie?" Tobias said in a childish manner while the creature called Discord... Oh yeah the princesses talked about him... Was holding his head in his arms.
"Tobias..." I said gritting my teeth. "Did ya' forget already? HOW YA' LEFT ME TO DIE?!" I screamed full of rage. At that moment the Elements arrived behind us.
"Oh how could I forget, dear Graves... But I've told you countless times... It was worth the price... I mean, look at me!" She stood up from the throne, her eyes shining blue and cards floating around her in multiple circles. "I became the Master of Cards!" She chuckled as I grit my teeth in anger. "Fufu... Ya' know... I always wanted to be able to use magic... All my life... The 'magic of cards' that my people teached me... That's not even magic... Just a trick... I was really sad when I realized it, ya' know?" She looked behind me for a second looking at the Elements before turning back to her monologue. "Do ya' realize how I felt when someone offered me real magic that I could use? For what price though? My best friend..." Did... Tobias... Look sad? "It was hard, ya' know? Choosing between my best friend and my childhood dream? But in the end I took the offer... Don't know if it was the right choice... But I did it anyway..." I looked at Tobias in the eye... She... Wasn't lying... "Of course... I felt bad for doing this to ya'... So I made sure they won't kill ya'... That was all I could do... After all... Ya' were and are my best friend..." Tobias sighted and fell on the throne Discord looking at her with his eyes full of surprise.
I opened my mouth to speak. "Tobias... I... Accept yar apology... But I want something in return..." She looked at me surprised.
"And what would that be, Graves?" She said tilting her head.
"YAR LIFE!" I screamed and started shooting at her.
Tobias ducked and hid herself behind the throne. "C'mon Graves! Can't we work this out somehow?"
"NO" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"C'mon! For old times sake?"
I respond by throwing a grenade at him. He quickly jumped away from the throne landing face first in the ground and groaning. I slowly walked at her and put my gun at her head. "It's over ya' bastard... I got ya' a nice one way ticket to hell!" As I pressed the trigger she disappeared in a flash of light and appeared up in the sky on another card throne.
Tobias opened her mouth to speak. "I feel hurt, Graves... That really, REALLY hurt my feelings, ya' know?" She said with a hurt expression. "Oh well..." He turned to the Elements "Thank ya' for letting me have yar tiara, I mean it looks a lot better on me then ya' anyway. Oh and tell Sunbutt I took all her cake, and some picture of Lulu when she was a baby, and I have to say, she is simply adorable! Ask her if she wants to be my pet, she'll get lots of cuddles and hugs."
Twilight looked at Tobias in confusion. Pinking then raised her hand like a child in school. "Oh! Oh! Tobi! Why are you a girl?!"
"Oh simple! I asked Discord to curse me so whenever I wear a tiara I become a girl!" She said with a smile. 'What the fuck is wrong with Tobias' head...' Pinkie giggle and said with a smile. "Thankies!"
"But... Why would you ask him to curse you?" Twilight asked in confusion.
"Cuz it's more fun that way!" She said happily. "And I am the prettiest princess!"
All the ponies looked at her like she was crazy... which she probably was...
"Oh well! See ya' later!" She smiled then teleported away.
All this time Discord spent laughing in the air, and when Tobias teleported away he did too.
~Canterlot, Third Person~
Celestia and Luna were watching the event though a portal. Celestia was gritting her teeth in anger, her mane became flames as hot as the sun. SHE STOLE HER CAKE!
Luna was laughing at what was happening and at her sister's reaction. Although she had a slight blush on her face at the pet part and the baby photos. For some reason she wanted to meet him.
""We have to meet Tobias Foxtrot and have a talk with him."" They both said at the same time. To which they giggled a little and went to do their duties for the day and the necessary preparations to take a day off.