//------------------------------// // The Banquet // Story: Not a Cloud In the Sky // by OutOfTheBlue //------------------------------// Cloud awoke only to find himself lying in bed, alone. His head was killing him and he felt extremely groggy, like he'd drank a shelf's worth of alcohol. Oddly enough, his blood felt... thick. It was disconcerting he could feel his blood being pumped through his body, but it wasn't necessarily a bad feeling, just odd. The door opened and a worried looking Pandora slowly walked towards him. "How are you feeling?" She calmly asked. "Like my head got used for a drum and my blood got replaced with molasses, thanks for knocking me out by the way, I don't know what came over me." He groaned out. Pandora set something down on the nightstand and walked over. She had a smear of chocolate frosting on her nose and looked tired. She slowly started petting his mane, he relaxed and grew a small smile before leaning forward and kissing her gently. She returned the kiss before retrieving what now was obviously a chocolate cupcake. "I made a bunch of these, and I didn't light your house on fire. They have peanut butter inside them by the way. Oh, and we're out of peanut butter." She softly replied. She continued, "I'm sorry, I put venom in that resin to act as a muscle relaxer, but, well, you kinda weren't supposed to eat it." She sheepishly replied. Cloud laughed, "Oh yeah, venom, I remember now." Before leaning forward and licking the frosting off of her snout. She blushed as he licked his lips with a smile. "Mm... it's good! Your bakings much better than earlier. I don't even taste something smoky!" Cloud carefully bit into the cupcake and was surprised at the flavor. "What the hell? How much peanut butter did she put in this!?" His bewildered mind thought. He could barely taste the chocolate but could definitely taste the peanut butter. After he finished and guzzled his entire cup of water, he noticed Pandora turn around. She asked, "By the way, um... do you think my crest is getting more mane like?" Hope brimming in her voice. Cloud looked and even ran his hoof over it, causing it to flatten. It was the same as usual. "No, sorry, I know how bad you want a mane, but don't sweat it. And before you start calling yourself ugly, I'll assure you, you are the hottest living being around. Anypony who says otherwise is a dumbass and probably blind." He said with a smirk. Pandora sighed before resting her head on his neck. Cloud wrapped a foreleg over her. "But, you should probably get a dress, we do have a banquet to attend tonight." ------------------------------- The Hearts and Hooves Day banquet was almost ready to start and two familiar male guards sat together at a table nursing their drinks. "Dude, I hate this stupid banquet. I mean it's supposed to be about actually relationships and stuff but instead it's literally a hookup holiday. Find a random fellow guard who's attractive, ask them to this, have a one night stand, and never talk again. Glad we didn't ask anypony this year aye Keep?" The guard asked. All if the guards actual colors were visible now, given that this was a formal event. The speaker was Steadfast Shield, a green unicorn with a glod mane. His companion, High Keep was sitting glumly with hus head on the table. "Keep?" Shield asked. Keep sighed, "I dunno, I kinda wish I'd asked somepony in particular. I mean just to give the whole 'new perspective' thing a try." Keep explained. Shield cocked his head, "Who?" Keep sighed, "Not a word to anypony ok? I was thinking about asking corpse face." He griped. Shield blinked, obviously confused. "What?" "Well, what we talked about got me thinking, what if he was a colt cuddler, I mean I dunno, I might be one too for all I know. I figured I could give it a try to see if it would work. He's so... dead all of the time but if somepony showed genuine interest he might be a stand up guy. I mean, it was just a passing thought. For all I know I'm not gay, but I don't really know, so... anything's possible?" He winced as he finished. Shield looked thoughtful before responding. "You know, you might be on to something. But where even is he? He should have been here by now." Their conversation was interrupted by a wave of quiet murmurs coming from the ball room entrance. "Wait, is that corpse face!?" "Who's he with?" "Sweet Celestia she's hot!" "How'd he land her?!" All eyes turned to the stallion who was walking with a gorgeous off white pegasus with a honey yellow mane. They were both dressed for the occasion, with Cloud in a suit and Pandora in a simple aquamarine colored dress. Both Keep and Shield's jaws dropped. "The hells he been keeping her!?" Shield sputtered. All the onlookers watched the newcomers with rapt attention. The group of game playing mare fuming silently. The leader of the group whispered to another, "I bet she's one of those stuck up elite airheads that just lifts her tail to get what she wants. Why on earth would someone so... impervious to feminine charm hook up with a bimbo like that." A chorus of affirmations sounded out. Most in the group could care less about Cloud as a pony, but as a prize, he was theirs. As Cloud and Pandora sat at an empty seat, the spotlight was flicked on to show captain Shining Armor standing at attention. "Royal Guards!" He sharply called. Immediately all ponies stood at attention. "As you might not be aware, this is not just a typical Hearts and Hooves Day banquet, but a special celebration in honor of the wedding of myself and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza in three months time." Upon the announcement cheering and clapping for the groom to be. As the eating began, the jealous mares glared at Pandora as she laughed and joked with the now actually smiling Cloud Nine. "I never! That smile was supposed to be mine!" Growled the leader, a blue earth pony with a rose mane,"I was supposed to flirt with him, seduce him, and then win all those bits!" She glared, venom in her eyes at the faux pegasus. The newcomer, a maroon pegasus with a pink mane shot a concerned look at the speaker. "He's a pony too you know, not just some toy you use and then throw away. I thought this whole game was because you wanted to get to know him, not just trick him into sleeping with you." She spat at the leader. All of the mares turned to look at the pegasus. Shock and disguist in their faces. The earth pony from before spoke. "Listen, I know you're new here but here's what you need to know. Corpse face over there, he's not a pony. No pony could resist all the temptation we throw their way and not give in. I don't care who, or what he is, but I do know how much money is riding on this. So if you get in my way, you'll be sorry." She finished with a snarl. The pegasus grew a shocked look before hwr face settled into a look of disgust. "And to think I actually played your little game for a while." She snarled before storming off to another table. After about forty-five minutes of eating, the lights dimmed and the captain returned to the stage. It was time for the annual singing lottery. Whomever's name got drawn had to go sing a song for their date. As the captain levitated out a slip of paper, all the ponies in the room held their breath. With a flourish Shining Armor read the card. "Cloud Nine, report to the stage!" The crowd erupted in sighes of relief and snickers of laughter. It was embarrassing to be called up, given basically none of the guards had any singing talent whatsoever. As Cloud walked up, he wracked his mind for what to sing. He saw Pandora shoot him a supportive nod and he looked out at the night sky, the stars shining brightly. Suddenly, the perfect song came to mind. He told the DJ what song and stood out in the spotlight. Almost everypony was looking forward to seeing this, corpse face himself, singing! Cloud cleared his throat as the music began. 'https://youtu.be/zp7NtW_hKJI The crowd was silent. Rather than a terrible performance, they'd heard somepony singing rather well. All of the sudden Pandora started clapping. "Way to go Cloud!" And the rest of the guards joined in. Cloud sheepishly took a bow and returned to his table, earning a hug from Pandora. Cloud excused himself to use the restroom as everyone started heading home. As Pandora waited by the doors, the mares approached her. The leader stared her dead in the eyes before snarling. "Back off, that pegasus your here with, he's mine. I don't care who tou are, but he's going to be with me. You know what, on second thought, you can have him when I'm done. You should always give your leftovers to the less fortunate." Before storming off. Pandora amd the mares stood staring on shock. Even the other players knew that was just over the line. ----------------------------- As Cloud and Pandora entered the house, Cloud gave Pandora a relaxed look, "I was thinking, and I think I'm ready to do it, you know?" He asked gently. Pandora froze before smiling warmly. "You really want to? O-ok, um... maybe in a little. Can you go get something for me though?" She asked. Cloud nodded his ascent before having a scrap of paper thrust into his hooves and was shoved outside. After he retrieved the requested items (though why you need six jars of peanut butter to have sex was beyond him) Cloud set the jars down before walking towards his bedroom. He heard a sultry voice cone from the bathroom. "Cloud, come in please." As Cloud entered he froze, wings shooting up shortly after. The bathroom looked totally different. The lights had been turned off, leaving only the light of dozens of light candles to light the room. I. The tub, lounged Pandora. As she turned and propped her hind leg up on the rim of the tub, Cloud's eyes widened. "I know how much you like how I look in the bath, given how... shiny I am. So I figured this would do nicely. Do-do you like it?" She asked, momentarily breaking character. Cloud nodded dumbly before shaking his head to clear his mind. He looked again before slowly smiling and closing the bathroom door, a splash could be heard before the door closed entirely.