The Pieces Lie Where They Fell

by Evilhumour


Chapter Five: Vix-Lei

Chapter Five

Vix-Lei

Vix-Lei was already on her hooves before the sun was even up, humming a wordless tune, throwing the blanket over the bed as she slid about in her rented room in this cute little hotel.

It was her first time in Equestria and in the capital city, and she had to admit that Canterlot Upper...was kinda what she was told she’d see.

"A bunch of stuffy sillies," she snorted to herself, attaching the shoulder holster for Lady Kabonk but deciding to leave Senor Hardhead behind as she didn’t expect to get into any trouble.

Pausing in front of the mirror to fix her hair, she decided she looked good. Still in her good mode, Vix-Lei danced her way out of the room and made her way downstairs with a bit of a hop from the landing, causing the few ponies and griffons to pull back in surprise.

“Guess it’s not everyday you see sometaur jump down, eh?” she chuckled to herself with the crowd mumbling at her. Limbering up a bit more, rubbing her shoulder, she made her way to the spread of food that had no one really watching it. With a whistle and shifty eyes, Vix-Lei took a plate for herself and sat down at an isolated table to enjoy her breakfast in peace, taking a bench as these chairs were not made for minotaurs in mind.

It was pretty okay, just nothing to write home about and if she did, her mom would be wondering why she’d be writing about this breakfast and not her other experiences.

Twirling the fork in her hands and drumming it against the table, Vix-Lei began to think of what she would do today.

She might as well as hang around the Honour Festival, see if she could spot this Blady fellow and get herself a gig tomorrow entertaining the people.

If not… she could just hop back into the Middle and see what she got there. If nothing still, well, she had the wide open world to travel.

“Might hit up Cuanmiztl Kingdom,” she said, scratching her chin, tapping her hoof against the floor. “Those cats seem a bit more fun than these naysayers.”

Grinning at her own joke, she pushed herself from the table and carried her plate back to the buffet table and carefully slid it underneath the stack of plates.

With that done, Vix-Lei made her way out of the hotel, accidentally lifting a griffon over her shoulder as she left the door as it was a bit too early to do the dance of who goes first through the threshold.

Shaking her head at the confused look on the griff’s face that little old her managed to toss him, she took a deep breath of the fresh mountain air.

She then immediately barreled into someone, causing her and the other person to fall into a mess on the ground.

Groaning and rubbing her head, Vix-Lei made sure to not shake her head with her horns being sharp and pointy.

“Ooo, that wasn’t too smart,” she muttered, looking to see the pony she’d knocked down. “You okay-wow, you’re a diamond dog!”

The diamond dog, with a really dark coat, brushed off his pocketed jacket and glared up at her. “You’re quite astute, madam, in describing species,” he huffed, his long nose twitching, with his sharp ears flicking a bit.

“Heh, I guess so,” Vix-Lei said, scratching the back of her head and looking around at the crates in the middle of the street with a lifter thingy rolling down the street before crashing into a building. “Do you need a hand with this?”

“Only if you can lift one of those crates by yourself, madam, otherwise…” he trailed off, no doubt amazed as she picked up both of them with ease. “Hmm, well I suppose I ate the charcoal there.” He chuckled briefly, running down the hill to grab the blue lifter thingy. “Thank you, you can place them down on the hand truck if you do not mind.”

“Nah,” Vix-Lei scoffed, shaking her head. “I’m good double d; so where do you need this stuff?”

“Double d…” he blinked before muttering ah to himself. “I see, how very cute. My name is Rex, madam…”

“Ah, I’m Vix-Lei,” she grinned, stepping beside old Rexy. “I’d give paw and shake, but I’m kinda got my own full at the moment.”

Rex simply looked at her again before shaking his head. “Charmed, miss Lei,” he grumbled, his short tail twitching behind him.

“Nah, it’s all one name, old boy,” she chuckled as she hefted the crates a bit higher to get a better grip on them. “So what’s in these boxes, bones?”

Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head and said, “Nothing as unimportant as bones, Vix-Lei. These are my associates’ and my merchandise, which are a touch on the fragile side of things so please do your best not to jostle them around.”

“Ah, sorry,” Vix-Lei blushed a bit. “So what’s in these boxes?”

“Special merchandise, Vix-Lei, that is quite fragile,” he stressed on the fragility of it, baring a bit of his fangs. He then let out a bit of a breath and looked at her. “They contain blank slates for our product that will act as the conduct for the Reclaimed love identification spell between the two individuals in question.”

“Okay…” Vix-Lei blinked in confusion, tilting her head as Rex dug out an ID card to the guards at the entrance. “So how do you fit in all this; I mean…” she edged out her elbow at Rex. “You is diamond dog, not unicorn. I mean, are you some sort of hired help?”

No, miss Lei, I am not hired help,” Rex narrowed his eyes. “As I have previously stated, I am a third party member to my associates’ business and I am actually the main provider of the formulae for the spell.”

“Oh wow, I didn’t know that diamond dogs knew how to use magic,” Vix-Lei blinked, marveling at this cool new fact.

“Diamond dogs do not have access to the arcane, miss Lei, so I need to use other means to achieve my craft,” Rex barked at her as he pushed the cart thingy a bit harder, with the handles making odd noises in his paws. “Here we are,” he paused in front of a stand that said Forever Find True Love. “If you would be so kind as to place the merchandise down, everything will be fine as diamonds.”

“‘Kay,” Vix-Lei walking ahead to place the crates down and let the Rex scurry ahead and start unpacking these cute small necklaces, taking out a display stand to put the necklaces on it. She stood for a moment, rocking on her hooves. “Soooooo, you’re on the approved list of stuff, right?”

“We will be once Lord Blade gives us his stamp of approval; why do you ask?” Rex turned to her with the sound of rattling bottles coming from his vest back.

Well, I know that the Honour Festival for the ponies’ dead heroes and gods is tomorrow, and if you can get your hoof in the door, you’ll be able to do all sorts of stuff and-”

“And you wish for me to place my name and my associate on the edge for sometaur that has a very questionable sense of comedy with a respected Noble house?” Rex snorted at her, shaking his head ruefully. “I may be a diamond dog but that does not mean I am an imbecile.“ He then pushed himself close to her face, resting his massive paws on the crate. “Now if you are quite done with your racist commentary, I would appreciate it if you would leave me be so I can finish my preparations.”

“All right, geez, you just had to say no,” Vix-Lei held up her hands, annoyed at how touchy this doggy was. “Boy,” she muttered to herself as she walked away, rolling her eyes to herself.

WIth nothing to do and being in the festival grounds, Vix-Lei decided to put that dull doggy out of her mind and enjoy herself.


It had been some time since she'd left the stand behind, wandering from place to place and seeing what they had to offer while doing her best not to be caught as a gate crasher. She had to say, these ponies were being just as dull as the minotaurs back home. No one could really take a joke all that well and were all too touchy and serious, and they found her attempts to make the day better annoying for some reason.

Still she couldn’t just give up as she spotted somegriffon that could use some cheering up.

Whoa there, buddy-birdy,” she chuckled, walking in front of the cranky-looking griff. “Where’s the fire and do ya need an alibi?” she asked, lightly tapping him on the shoulder.

The griff just shook his head, just saying “Get out of my way.”

“Oh come on there, pretty birdy, tell ol’ Vix-Lei what’s wrong,” she whined, dancing on her hooves and feeling the need to bring out Lady Kabonk.

“I don’t see how it’s any of your business,” he grumbled harshly at her, clicking his beaky beak at her.

“It ain’t but it bums me out to see anyone glum, so tell me chum,” she admitted, using her skills to lightly tap him on the head. “What’s got your feathers so twisted up?”

Pushing away Lady Kabonk, the griff stared hard at her. “I just got fired for bullshit reasons after I saved his mare’s life! So if you don’t mind, I’m going to back to my hotel room, get drunk and pretend that this day never happened, alright?”

“Alright, alright, I get it, geez,” Vix-Lei snapped back, putting away Lady Kabonk. “Try and help a person out and that’s what you get? Feh.”

Storming away from the griffon, she was so done with Equestria. All these annoying jerks couldn’t take even a simple joke and she didn’t need them. Tomorrow, she would leave the hotel and go off to find something a bit more interesting and fun than this dull place for good.