//------------------------------//
// The Tale of Princess Bejeweled and the Diamond Dogs 
// Story: Love Tap of Marendelle 
// by Godslittleprincess 
//------------------------------//

	“Oh, sing sweet nightingale/Sing sweet nightingale/HIIIIIIIGH above me,” sang/screeched Queen Spoiled Rich as her daughter Princess Diamond Tiara played the flute.  The two of them were on a diplomatic visit in Marendelle with King Filthy Rich, and Queen Spoiled had insisted on treating her hosts to some “entertainment.”
Diamond Tiara shot her new friends, Queen Sweetie Belle and Princesses Apple Bloom and Scootaloo, an apologetic look as she played.  The three sisters cringed as they flattened their ears against their heads in an attempt to block out the visiting queen’s “singing”.  Their respective husbands, King Button Mash and Princes Pip and Rumble, gripped their chairs in an attempt to keep themselves from simply getting up and leaving.
Also present were Button Mash’s parents, Love Tap and Cinnamon Swirl, Crown Princess Snow Pea, her sister Princess Little Button, and their three cousins Roller Blade, Skater, and Apple Butter.  Snow Pea and her grandparents smiled awkwardly, grimacing every time Queen Spoiled let loose a sour note, which was roughly every three to five seconds.  Little Button and her cousins, however, simply yanked their seat cushions out from under them and wrapped the cushions around their ears, trying desperately to muffle the awful noises.  The only member of the audience that seemed comfortable during Queen Spoiled’s performance was her husband who had discreetly stuffed his ears with candle wax.
“Oh, sing sweet nightingale/Sing sweet nightingale/HIIIIIIIGH above,” Queen Spoiled continued.
After another minute or so of torture, the queen finally stopped.  King Rich applauded heartily while the rest of the royals gave a few courtesy claps.
“Well, wasn’t that something, your majesties?” King Rich asked.
“It sure was,” King Button weakly agreed.
“Well, there goes two minutes of our lives we’re never getting back,” Rumble muttered.  His wife smacked him with one of her wings.
“Be nice,” Scootaloo whispered, noticing the condescending look the queen was directing at them.
“Perhaps our hosts would like an encore,” suggested Queen Spoiled.
“NO!” screamed Little Button before being silenced by her sister’s hoof.
“What my sister means is,” Snow Pea began, giving their guests a very uncomfortable smile, “we wouldn’t dream of asking you to wear out your lovely voice by having you sing for us again.”
“Besides,” Love Tap added, “Cinnamon and I already had plans to take the children out to the museum.”
“We did?” her husband inquired before his wife nudged him with her elbow.  “Right.  We did.”
“I’m afraid we must be going now.  Come along, little ones.”
“Lucky,” Rumble grumbled as the children left the room with Love Tap and Cinnamon.



“Whew,” sighed LB.  “Thanks for getting us out of there, Grandma.  My head was about to explode.”
“I’ll say,” agreed Apple Butter, rubbing her still sore ears.
“I kind of wish we were doing something more exciting than going to a boring museum though,” said Roller Blade.
“Aww, don’t complain, Roller.  I’d take this over spending another minute with Queen Spoiled any day,” his sister scolded.
“Besides,” Love Tap continued, “some of the artifacts here have some very interesting stories behind them.”
After about fifteen minutes roaming the museum, the group came to an area that mostly displayed gemstones and outdated lab equipment.  Also on display were old fireworks, maps of the jungle, worn notebooks with yellowing pages, and other odds and ends.
“This part of the museum has some of King Saltpeter’s stuff, right, Grandma?” asked Snow Pea.  “I remember because you said that he was a ‘patron of the sciences.’”
“That’s right, Snowy,” beamed Love Tap.
“Well, there’s definitely a lot of science in here,” noted Roller Blade.
“Grandma, what’s a patron?” asked Little Button.
“Well, Lil, a patron is somepony who supports a cause by donating money and/or resources,” answered Love Tap.
“When your grandma and I were on the throne, we were patrons of the museum because we donated a lot of our old stuff here,” added Cinnamon.
“I wonder what Snowy is going to be a patron of when she’s queen,” said Skater.
“Probably math,” groaned LB, rolling her eyes.
“Hey!” exclaimed Snowy.
“What about architecture?” suggested Apple Butter.  “Architecture’s got math in it.”
“Well, whatever Snowy chooses, I’m sure it will be wonderful,” Love Tap assured.
Roller Blade found himself drawn to a display case labeled “Inventions of King Saltpeter.”  In addition to a few tubes of fireworks, the case also displayed a box of matches, three signal flares, a container of a dull gray substance labeled “flash powder,” and …
“Are those Pop Rocks?” gasped Roller.
“Why, yes, they are,” replied Love Tap.  “King Saltpeter invented those on a bit of a whim.  Of course, back then, they were just called popping candy.”
“Cool!”
“Did he invent rock candy, too?” asked Skater, looking over a different display case.  The case held an array of gemstones, mostly diamonds, and one bag of clear rock candy.
“Oh no,” giggled Love Tap.  “There’s actually an interesting story behind what’s in that case.  Come.  Gather around.”
The children moved closer to her as Love Tap began her tale.



A long time ago, Marendelle was much smaller and much closer to the coast.  The jungle was completely unexplored, and many ponies made their living by farming cocoa, sugar cane, and pearls.  However, one day hundreds of cocoa trees were infected by a horrible rot.  Many ponies became worried that they would not be able to support themselves and their families.  While some ponies worked to find a way to control the rot, others suggested going deeper into the jungle to look for new resources.
King Saltpeter was wary about sending ponies into the jungle.  After all, it was largely unknown and shrouded in myth and mystery.  Nevertheless, he sent a small team of explorers and naturalists into the jungle to try and discover its secrets.  When nopony returned after several weeks, King Saltpeter sent another team into the jungle to discover what happened to the first team, but they seemingly vanished as well.
Now, during this time, his daughter Princess Bejeweled was just about to become of age, and she was desperate to prove her capability as a leader.  You see, Princess Bejeweled was the first female heir to be born into Marendelle’s royal family, and quite a few ponies looked down on her because of this.  Not that they would ever say so to her or her father’s face.
When Bejeweled found out about the second exploration team’s disappearance, she suggested sending in another rescue party only this time, she would lead the team herself.  King Saltpeter immediately rejected the idea, worried that his only child would vanish into the jungle as well.  However, the princess stubbornly insisted on going, believing that she would be able to find the cause of the disappearances.  Eventually, with some reassurance from Queen Brooksong, King Saltpeter agreed.



On the day of the rescue team’s departure, Princess Bejeweled was approached by an earth pony colt roughly about her age.  The colt had a straw-colored coat and a mane and tail that reminded her of grass.  He was followed by a much younger filly, also an earth pony, with a yellow green coat and dark brown pigtails.  They each carried a pack on their backs.
“Sugar Cane, go home.  I mean it,” the colt scolded the filly.
“May I help you?” asked Princess Bejeweled.
“Your majesty,” the colt bowed.  “My name is Reed.  I am requesting permission to accompany your rescue party.  You see, my father is Professor Papyrus.  He’s a botanist who was part of the first expedition into the jungle, and I’m hoping to find him.”
“I want to go, too!” cried the filly.  “Please, big brother.”
“Sugar, no!  You’re staying with Aunt and Uncle!”
“But—”
“No ‘buts.’  It’s bad enough that the rescue team already has one girl dragging them down.”  Reed froze in embarrassment, realizing who he had just blurted that statement in front of.  He could feel the princess’s offended glares drilling into the back of his head.
“Uh, I mean—,” Reed stammered once he found the courage to look Princess Bejeweled in the face.
“You will find the rest of the rescue party at the courtyard, packing for the journey.  If you wish to join us, go make yourself useful and help them pack,” Bejeweled spat before heading to the kitchens with a huff.
Alone in the kitchens, Bejeweled checked over the provisions, making sure that the party had enough rations for the trip.  She was later joined by somepony she loved and admired very much.
“Need help packing?” asked Queen Brooksong with a smile like a bright summer day.
“Hello, Stepmother,” Bejeweled greeted, smiling back half-heartedly.
“Is everything alright?”
“More or less.  Except for…”
The princess glared at the floor, thinking about what Reed had said about her earlier.
“Well,” Queen Brooksong urged.
“Except for that colt that asked to come with us,” Bejeweled admitted.  “He said that I’m going to slow down the rescue party.”
“This is about you being a girl again, isn’t it?”
Bejeweled nodded, still scowling.
“Don’t let it get to you,” Brooksong encouraged, tilting her stepdaughter’s head up by her chin.  “Remember what I always told you back when I was just your governess?”
Bejeweled brightened a bit as she began, “You’re braver than you believe…”
“Stronger than you seem,” Brooksong joined her, “and smarter than you think.”
“Thanks, Stepmother.  I needed that,” Bejeweled beamed.  “It seems like you’re the only pony who believes in me these days.”
“For what it’s worth, your father believes in you, too,” assured Brooksong.  “He’d just rather not prove it by sending you into a jungle where ponies have mysteriously vanished.  Anyway, good luck and be careful.  If you run into any problems, just use that big brain of yours to think your way out.”
Queen Brooksong gave her stepdaughter a gentle, affectionate tap on the forehead at the end of her last sentence.  Then, she pulled Bejeweled into a hug before leaving the kitchens.  Bejeweled took a deep breath before heading out to the courtyard where the rest of the team was waiting for her.
Once the princess had joined them, the rescue team made their way into the jungle, following the trail that the missing ponies had marked.  Everypony kept their eyes peeled for any signs of struggle or foul play.  Eventually, however, the group decided to set up camp for the night and continue the next morning.  Reed took this as the perfect opportunity to speak with the princess that he had unintentionally insulted earlier.
“Your majesty,” Reed began, “I’m sorry if what I said before offended you.”
“What do you mean IF it offended me?” snapped Bejeweled as she unrolled her sleeping bag.
“THAT what I said before offended you,” Reed corrected himself.  “I didn’t mean to say it.  It just came out.”
“I know,” Bejeweled conceded.  “Other ponies think I’m not good enough of an heir just because I’m a mare.  Well, I’m going to prove them wrong.  If ponies will just give me a chance, I’ll surprise them.”
“So, are you still mad at me or are we good?”
“We’re good…for now.”
Suddenly, everypony heard a scream coming from a part of the jungle they already passed.  Princess Bejeweled, Reed, and two other ponies went over to investigate.  To their surprise, they found Sugar Cane clinging to a tree surrounded by tribal hamsters.
“Hey, shoo!  Shoo!  She’s with us,” Bejeweled shouted at the hamsters.  Upon hearing her shout and seeing the group approach them, the feral rodents scattered.
“You were supposed to stay with Aunt and Uncle,” Reed scolded his younger sister as she lowered herself from the tree.
“Well, you’re not going to make me head back now that it’s starting to get dark, are you?” exclaimed Sugar Cane.
Reed opened his mouth to further protest but failed to find any sound arguments against his sister’s words.
“Your majesty, do you think those, uh, hamsters are the ones behind the missing ponies?” asked one of the other ponies.
“I don’t think so,” answered Bejeweled.  “The markers continue farther down the trail.  Besides, they only seem to go after ponies who travel alone.”
“So, like it or not, my sister’s pretty much stuck with us, isn’t she?” Reed deadpanned, glaring at Sugar Cane.
“Pretty much,” the princess confirmed.



The next day, the rescue team with Sugar Cane in tow continued their trek further into the jungle.  The farther they continued down the trail, the rockier the ground became.  Eventually, they reached a part of the jungle with no trail markings.
“This has to be the last place the missing ponies were,” Bejeweled pointed out.  She crouched down noticing that the ground had been disturbed.  Furthermore, some of the markings on the ground appeared to be pawprints.
Almost immediately, several paws came out of the ground and grabbed onto her and pulled her downwards.
“Princess!” cried Reed before being pulled down himself.  Before long, the entire party had been dragged beneath the ground, landing hard in what appeared to be the middle of a network of tunnels.
“Where are we?” cried Sugar, scooting closer to her brother for protection.
“Well, we’re rather obviously underground,” noted Reed.
The group saw figures emerging from the shadows, and to their surprise, they found that their captors were…
“Dogs,” Bejeweled flatly stated in confusion.  “They’re dogs.”
“We are the Diamond Dogs,” said the large one who appeared to be their leader, “and you ponies shall be our slaves and mine pretty gems for us.”
“And if we refuse?”
As if in reply to her question, about a hundred more dogs emerged from the shadows.  Even a blind pony could clearly see that they were vastly outnumbered.  Any resistance would likely be met with the most brutal of retribution.
“Move ponies,” ordered the lead dog as the other dogs forced them on their hooves.
The dogs led the group down a particular tunnel.  At the end of the tunnel was a cave full of cages, and inside some of those cages were the missing ponies.  Reed and Sugar Cane recognized one of the caged ponies and attempted to break from the ranks.
“Dad!” Reed called, catching the attention of an older stallion.  The stallion shared Reed’s coat color but had a black mane and wore thick glasses.
“Reed?  Sugar?” the stallion called back.
However, the lead dog grabbed the siblings and unceremoniously stuffed them into a cage with Princess Bejeweled.
“Stay here,” the lead dog ordered.  “When we come back, we will let you out to find us pretty gems.”
Another dog who appeared to be second in command added, “And if you don’t do what we say, we will grind your bones to make our bed.”
“Bread,” his superior corrected in annoyance.
“What?”
“You were supposed to say, ‘We will grind your bones to make our BREAD.’”
“Oh.  Who would want to eat bread made of bones?  You could break a tooth.”
“Well, who would want to sleep on a bed made of bones?  You could hurt your back.”
“Said the big dog who probably sleeps on a bed of rocks,” Reed butted in.
“Quiet, pony!” both dogs barked before leaving the cave and resuming their argument.
Once the ponies were alone, Professor Papyrus addressed his son, “Why in Equestria did you bring your sister with you?”
“I didn’t bring her.  She followed us,” Reed answered in annoyance.
“Well, now, we know why ponies have been going missing,” observed the princess.  “Now, we just need to find a way to get out of here.”
“And just how do we do that?” snarked Reed.
“I’m thinking.”
“Well, in their haste, the dogs forgot to take away our supplies,” noted one of the other ponies.  “Perhaps, we can use them to escape from these cages.”
“I’m afraid that probably won’t do us much good,” replied Bejeweled.  “Even if we get out of our cages, the dogs could just force us into new ones through brute strength alone.  We need to convince them to let us go willingly.”
Bejeweled carefully analyzed the situation that she and her ponies were in, trying to find a solution to their predicament.  Now, what did she know about her captors?  They were dogs.  They loved gems.  They lived underground in the jungle.  Above all, they weren’t very smart.
Princess Bejeweled’s thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a crunching sound from behind her.  Bejeweled and Reed turned around and saw Sugar Cane munching on some rock candy.
“You brought candy with you?  Really?” Reed hissed incredulously.
“What?! I like candy,” Sugar Cane retorted.
Princess Bejeweled’s eyes widened when she saw the rock candy.  She opened her pack looking for signal flares.  To her relief, she found five.  She held on to one and gave the rest to Reed.
“Use these to stick the candy together,” she ordered.  “Try to make a huge mass bigger than Sugar Cane’s head.”
Reed looked at her quizzically before his eyes widened in realization.  “You’ve got a plan.”
“I’ve got the perfect plan.”



An hour had passed, and the Diamond Dogs returned with chains, harnesses, and wagons.  They forced the ponies out of the cages and lined them up.
“Now the puny ponies will mine pretty gems for us,” the lead dog said, rubbing his paws together in glee.
“No,” Bejeweled flatly refused.
“What?!” the dog snarled, flashing his sharp teeth at the princess.  Bejeweled unflinchingly eyeballed the dog in defiance.
“You heard me, and if you don’t let us go right now, I’ll have my champion tear you all to pieces.”
“Oh, and who is the pretty pony’s champion?”
“Her.”  Bejeweled pointed to Sugar Cane, who let out an unconvincing growl.
The dog took one look at Sugar Cane and blinked a few times.  Then, he doubled over laughing.
“You think I’m kidding?” Bejeweled challenged.
“That puny pony can’t even squash a bug,” the dog continued to laugh, his underlings joining him.
“Then, perhaps a demonstration is in order,” Bejeweled smirked, knowing that they were playing right into her hooves.  “I’ll have my champion do three things.  If you are able to copy any of them, we’ll be your slaves.  If not, you are to release us on our terms.  Deal?”
Bejeweled stuck out her hoof towards the dog who shook it in agreement.  “Deal.”
“The first task is to choose a diamond and crush it to pieces with your bare hooves, err, paws.”  Bejeweled gave Reed the signal, and Reed retrieved what looked to be a colossal diamond from among the rocks.
The dogs gaped at the sheer enormity of the “diamond.”  Reed placed the crystalline mass in front of his sister, and she gave it a good stomp with her front hooves.  As planned, the mass easily broke into much smaller chunks.
The lead dog growled and scanned the cave frantically for a larger diamond.  Unable to find one, he eventually settled on a diamond the size of a dog’s fist that had been left in one of the wagons.  He squeezed and punched.  He punched and squeezed.  He even jumped on it a few times, but try as he might, the large dog couldn’t break the diamond.
“Well, if you think that’s something, you should see her eat it,” said Bejeweled.
“Eat it?  That’s not possible,” the dog cried.
“Is it?”  Bejeweled satisfied smirk only grew wider.
On cue, Sugar Cane picked up the chunks of crystal from the floor, crunching on them one by one until they were all gone.
“Show off,” her brother scoffed.
“What?  I’m hungry,” Sugar snapped.
The dogs’ jaws practically hit the floor after seeing such a small filly seemingly perform the impossible.  Their leader looked at the diamond that was still in his paw and gingerly attempted to bite off a chunk.  He gnawed on it a few more times, each chomp getting progressively more forceful, but he eventually gave up because his teeth were beginning to hurt.
“Alright, pony,” the dog growled.  “Your champion may have beat me twice, but she won’t beat me again.”
“So, you can set things on fire with your mind, too?” Bejeweled deadpanned.
“What?”
“Just watch what she does to this stick.”
Bejeweled handed Sugar Cane the signal flare that she had been saving and nodded.  Sugar took the flare from the princess and lit it, taking care to point the fiery end away from her face and body.  The dogs’ surprised expressions quickly changed to those of pure horror as they fell at Bejeweled’s hooves, begging her for mercy.
“Please spare us,” the dogs groveled.  “We’ll do anything.”
“Here are our terms,” Bejeweled began, holding her head high like the princess she was.  “Firstly, release everypony at once and allow us to return to Marendelle.”
“Done,” agreed the lead dog, still cowering.
“Secondly, we want ten full wagons worth of gems for use as emergency funds.”
“Ugh.  Fine.”
“Thirdly, we want half of all the mines you own.”
“Half?!”
“As a show of good will, you get to choose which half.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“Finally,” Bejeweled paused, and her eyes fell on the diamond that the lead dog was still holding.  She grabbed the diamond out of his paw and continued, “We want you to swear your loyalty to whoever possesses this diamond.  Currently, that’s me.”
“If it’s our loyalty you want, you have it.  Just go away.”



“And so,” Love Tap closed, “Princess Bejeweled led her ponies safely out of the jungle and had the diamond fashioned into a pendant that she passed on to her descendants.”
She turned to her granddaughters and said with a smile, “In fact, your father is wearing it right now.”
“Wow,” Snow Pea, Lil, and their cousins gasped in amazement.
“Whatever happened to Reed, Grandma?” asked Little Button.  “Did he and Princess Bejeweled fall in love and get married?”
“Well, yes and no,” Love Tap replied.  “You see, at that time Princess Bejeweled wasn’t interested in romance, but she knew that as heir, she needed to continue the royal line, so she agreed to an arranged marriage.  In time, however, her first husband passed, and she actually did end up falling in love with and marrying Reed.  By then, Bejeweled had already retired, and her granddaughter was ruling as queen.”
“How many other female heirs have there been, Grandma?” Snow Pea asked curiously.
“Well, you would be the fourth.”
“Wait, you mean to tell me that in all Marendelle’s history, only four mares have been in line the throne?” Apple Butter exclaimed.  “What are the odds of that happening?”
“Well,” Snow Pea began, wishing she had a pencil, paper, and maybe one of those fancy counting machines that the university uses.
“Don’t answer that!” Lil snapped.
“Sometimes things just happen the way they do despite the odds,” said Cinnamon.  “I mean, what are the odds that your Grandma Tia would end up having seven daughters?”
“One in 128,” Snowy quickly answered before her sister could stop her.  “Of course, that is if she had our aunts one at a time, but since Aunt Twilight and Aunt Sunset are twins, we’d have to factor in the odds of Grandma Tia having twin girls.”
“Ugh,” groaned Little Button.  “So much math!”