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// The Most Beautiful Creature to Ever Sear Your Eyeballs  
// Story: Anon Vs. Justice, a Not-So-Epic Showdown Told Mercifully Quick 
// by Justice3442 
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Chapter 5


The creature above is unlike anything you’ve seen before. Anything you’ve dreamed before. It is more radiant and beautiful than you could possibly imagine. You’d don’t even think your thoughts describing what she looks like would do this being of ephemeral beauty justice so you just think really hard about the hyperlink you want to post and also a picture of her. 


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It is so beautiful you can’t help but suffer a severe seizure that has your entire body thrashing despite its severed spine.

The blue pony looks up in surprise and the most eye-twitchiest awe you’ve ever seen. “Princess Changeling Rainbow Magic Pants?!” he cries. 

“Yes, Justice,” Princess Changeling Rainbow Magic Pants says in her soothing and alluring voice. “You have fought well.”

“… No?” ‘Justice’ answers quizzically, but also villianically. "I mean… I just wrote in that I had an extremely OP weapon and claimed victory.”

“Nevertheless, your prize awaits,” Magic Changeling Rai—

“For goddsake, sir-and-or-madam, just think of her as ‘Magic Pants’!”

Magic Pants says in her delightfully musical—

‘BAM!’

“OW!” you exclaim from the fresh kick to your head. 

“Alright, stop thinking, I need to find out why Magic Pants is here.”

“I am your prize, Justice!” Magic Pants announces… gracefully.

“Stop it,” Justice growls out as he looks down at you. He looks back up at Magic Pant’s radiant splen--

‘PAFT’

“OUCH!”

He looks back up at Magic Pants. “… Wat? I thought the prize was Sunset Shimmer.”

“No, for you said that ‘winner take all’, and I am quite literally ‘all’ conveniently in the form of a single being, near perfect except for my one tragic flaw.”

“Not going to ask…” Justice replies.

“For you see, I care too much!”

Justice takes a deep breath then lets it out. 

“Now! We must away to my magic land of stars and magic and also World of Warcraft crossovers!” Magic Pants says.

“… Yeah…” Justice replies. “I’m going to take a hard ‘no’ on tha—”

With a delightfully majestic and magical sneeze, Magic Pants lets loose a spray of what could only be the most powerful and mystic phlegm in all of creation. This phlegm immediately tears open a hole in space-time that begins to draw in both Magic Pants and Justice. 

“AWAY!” Magic Pants cries majestically.

“Oh God, why did I write the ending like this?!” Justice cries far less majestically as he feebly digs his hooves into the ground before he is taken into Magic Pants whimsical and mysterious hole.

With Magic Pants gone, you stop your joyous seizure of joyousness. You try to ponder the last few minutes but find you are still quite unable to give any fucks. Still, you can’t help but wonder what the future will bri—

“Twilight?!” a feminine voice calls out. “I checked out that weird portal that surprisingly neither you nor I am responsible for and I found this weird creature that also surprisingly neither you nor I am responsible for.”

A purple pony face with a horn protruding from its forehead pops up over you. This pony has a purple mane with a single, light blue stripe in it and she’s staring down at you as if wondering what to do with you.

If you could give any fucks, you would hope that she decides ‘nurse you back to health and also cuddles’.

“Just get rid of it!” the voice you recognize as ‘Twilight’s’ calls out.

“Okay!” the purple pony says. 

The last thing you see is the back of a shovel coming directly for your face.

The End