//------------------------------// // Chapter 2 - Impossible Morning // Story: Impossible Life // by Battlecat //------------------------------// Twilight Sparkle slowly drifted back to consciousness and cracked her eyes opened. A beam of sunlight was beating down on her face causing her to winced as her eyes reacted to the unexpected brightness. She was quite confused as she tried to remember the last time she had actually slept through the night. “Ugh, it can't be morning already. What time is . . .” Her eyes shot opened wide as memories of the previous night came screaming back into her sleep-addled mind. The tense conversation about Twilight's preference for mares on the train. Acceptance and support. Hours of conversation capped by an impulsive admission that she was attracted to Rarity. “I told her,” Twilight whispered as panic set in. “I told her. Oh, sweet Celestia, I told her!” She stared at the ceiling trying to remember the whole conversation through the sleepy fog that hung over her mind. The rush of memories continued to flow over her. Rarity's gorgeous alabaster fur illuminated in the moonlight made her heart race. A small spark of hope grew as she recalled the end of their conversation. That spark was quickly extinguished by a powerful wave of fear and anxiety. “Is she really giving me a chance?” she whispered to herself. “Oh please tell me that wasn't just another insane dream.” Twilight slowly climbed out of bed as her mind spun around trying to find some evidence to confirm or deny the impossible turn of events just one day earlier. She gingerly put her hoof on her cheek trying to remember the gentle touch of lips that brushed her cheek in the darkness. Was it real or was it just another cruel dream? The nightmares were painful but easy to ignore, unlike the dreams. The dreams about Rarity accepting her love were only a cruel trick by her mind that left her fearing for her sanity. "Even if it was a dream, the conversation on the train was real. Rarity knows my secret now." She shivered with fear even though she knew Rarity was not a cruel pony. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and was horrified by the state of the pony staring back. Twilight hadn’t taken care of herself on the train ride and she hadn’t even bothered to preen her wings. Her mane was tangled and her fur just looked scruffy. “Oh my goodness, I can't go see Rarity looking like this!” she gasped in horror. She galloped off to her shower to get cleaned up. Rarity was beautiful and took great pride in her appearance. Twilight was merely herself but she couldn't face Rarity without at least cleaning herself up. She would look as good as she was able when she stood and faced the judgment of the pony she loved. Twilight felt much better after cleaning herself up but her anxiety was still threatening to overwhelm her while she wandered through her empty castle. Finally, she arrived at the kitchen and found Spike inside eating his breakfast. He looked up with a surprised expression on his face. “Twilight! I didn’t know you were back from Griffonstone already!” said Spike. “I arrived late last night,” she replied evasively. “I didn’t want to wake you or Starlight up so I slipped in quietly.” “I appreciate that but I wish you'd left me a note. I would have cooked something for you. Did the summit go well Twilight?” Twilight glanced over at Spike, barely paying attention as she assembled a bowl of cereal for her breakfast. She needed to get out as soon as she could. She was just barely holding together as her worries erased “That's ok Spike, I'm fine with cereal today. The summit went quite smoothly Spike. There have been great improvements to the conditions there. Where is Starlight this morning?” Spike tapped a claw to his cheek. “She’s learning about animals from Fluttershy today I think. So, what do you need me to do today?” Twilight froze with the spoon halfway to her mouth. She felt her usual pang of fear about how her faithful assistant would react to her feelings about Rarity. Twilight wasn’t even sure if he still had a crush on Rarity but she couldn't risk him finding out about her feelings. “I don't have anything in mind yet. What did you have planned for today Spike?” He gestured wildly as he made his response. “I’ve got a bit of shelving to do in the library and some dusting and then I was going to spend the afternoon with the Crusaders. Is that ok?” Twilight took a bite of her cereal and smiled with relief. At least he wasn't planning to go to Rarity's house. “Yes, that sounds just fine Spike. Enjoy yourself!” Twilight slowly walked through the streets of Ponyville in the mid-morning sun. Ponies were out and about in the market going about their daily business. A few glances and greetings were sent her way but her presence was mostly ignored. She had already grown a couple inches taller since her ascension but she still didn't stand out in a crowd like Cadance. With her wings tightly by her side, she wandered her way through the market towards her goal but a friendly voice forced her to stop. “Twilight! Ah didn't realize you were back already. How was your trip Sugarcube?” She turned to face Applejack at her sales stand and suppressed a moment of irritation at the interruption of her mission. She quickly put on the cheerful mask she had worn for ages. “Hi Applejack,” she replied with her practiced calm. “I got in late last night and I'm just heading over to Rarity's place.” Applejack tapped her hoof to her chin. “Ah think she's still out of town. She went to Manehattan to deliver some new items to her shop a couple days ago.” “I know, she wound up on the same train as me,” Twilight replied. “Could I get a dozen Apples? She could probably use something to eat.” “Sure thing Twilight. Here you are,” Applejack said, hoofing over a bag of apples and Twilight levitated over a couple bits and with a polite nod she continued her walk to Rarity's shop. Twilight's hooves were moving of their own accord to take her the long way to Rarity's house. Her fear was painful and she silently wished this was the first time she had made this pathetic walk through Ponyville. The dreams about Rarity accepting her always ended with an invitation to tea or dinner. The next day she would inevitably make the walk through town to Rarity's home only to discover through careful conversation that it had been a dream. No matter how many times she was wrong, she couldn't help thinking that maybe this time the dream was real. Today was different since the conversation on the train was absolutely real. Twilight was certain she had simply fallen asleep after arriving at the castle and Rarity certainly hadn't visited her and invited her to tea. Her latest fever dream would evaporate into dust but this time she wouldn't be able to go on with life as normal. Now that her secret was out, her fate and their friendship were entirely in Rarity's hooves. She stopped and stared the door to Rarity's boutique as she had so many times in the past. They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result. She knew today was different but the nature of that difference was one thing she simply could not know. With halting motion she still lifted her hoof and gently knocked on the door. “Come iiin!” came the response from the captivating voice. Twilight put her hoof to her chest and took a deep calming breath before pushing the door opened. She slowly walked inside, forcing a neutral expression on her face and bracing for the worst. Rarity was levitating around a duster cleaning up the shop from her days away. She looked over at the door and the warmth in her smile made Twilight’s heart stop. “Good morning Twilight, I’m glad to see you. Just let me finish up and we can go upstairs for our tea.” Twilight cautiously walked through the door, afraid to broach the subject of why she was here. “I bought some apples this morning. I wasn’t sure how much food you had on hoof since you were away.” “That’s lovely darling,” Rarity replied with a final flourish of her duster. “I’ll still have to shop but something fresh will tide me over for now. There we go, all tidied up. Let us adjourn to my kitchen for some tea.” Rarity turned and made her way to the stairs. Twilight followed and couldn’t help watching the swaying of her white flanks and purple tail. It was a guilty pleasure since she knew Rarity would just head straight to the kitchen to start the tea. This was one of the few moments when she could openly admire her lovely friend. Then Rarity stopped unexpectedly on the landing ahead and turned around to look at Twilight. She put her hoof over her mouth and began to giggle. “Oh my goodness Twilight,” she said between laughs. “I must have been terribly oblivious if you react like this all the time when you look at me.” Twilight’s eyes went wide and her heart stopped. She felt like she had been caught with her hoof in the cookie jar as she watched Rarity. Then the words registered in her mind and she felt moisture forming in her eyes. “It wasn’t a dream this time?” Twilight whispered as her knees became weak with relief. Rarity’s face took on a worried expression. “Well yes, darling. I assumed that’s why you were here this morning after everything that happened last night. I did invite you after all. Come Twilight, sit down before you faint.” Rarity walked to her small kitchen and pulled out a chair for Twilight to sit in. Twilight sat down and wiped her eyes before the tears got out of control. Rarity poured some near boiling water into the teapot and sat down across from Twilight. Her face was creased with an expression of concern. “So what was that you were saying about dreams Twilight?” Twilight sighed stared down at the table before spilling yet another secret. “I have a recurring dream every few weeks where you accepted my feelings and invited me to come by in the morning. Every time I would come by and see if this time it was real but it never was. I was terrified last night was another dream.” “Why would you be terr- . . .” Rarity's voice drifted off as realization struck her. “You knew the conversation on the train was real. You were afraid you’d only dreamt about us speaking in your bedroom last night, weren’t you?” Twilight looked ashamed but she also smiled weakly as a weight lifted from her shoulders. “I had to brace myself for the worst when I came here today. I’ve never been more relieved to be wrong.” Rarity smiled as she levitated the teapot over and poured a cup for each of them. “I’m glad you're feeling better darling. I can't imagine how it must have felt to carry a torch for so long while fearing my reaction.” Twilight nodded and fluttered her wings nervously while picking up her cup. “Telling you the truth yesterday was the most impulsive decision I’ve made in a long time. I doubt I would have ever said anything if we hadn’t had such a nice day talking on the train.” “It’s a bit like a romantic tragedy,” Rarity said with a sigh. “Pining away for your love while being filled with fear of discovery and rejection. Some stories should really just stay on the pages of my books.” Twilight let out a nervous laugh in spite of herself. “I suppose it is like a story in a way. I was doing my best to be satisfied with just having your friendship all these years. I still can’t believe you’re willing to give me a chance to be something more.” Rarity took a sip of her tea and looked over at Twilight sympathetically. “Yes, well as I said last night, I haven’t exactly had much luck with stallions. I suppose we should talk about that next, shouldn’t we?” Twilight nodded, nervously sipping her tea. “I suppose we should but I really don't know where to start. In all that time I’ve known you, I never contemplated how to handle you actually choosing to date me.” “The great planner Twilight Sparkle has no plan?” Rarity said with a smile on her face. “I find that hard to believe.” Twilight looked at the blue eyes that captivated her so easily and felt her ears fold down on her head. “I daydreamed about it once or twice but it was such an impossible fantasy all it caused me was pain.” “I guess even the most far-fetched dream can come true,” Rarity replied softly. Twilight stared at her tea as if some deep secret was buried there. She was searching for some answer, something to say to take the first step on the road to winning Rarity’s heart. All she saw was emptiness and fear of pushing too hard and of driving the pony she wanted away. Rarity watched with sympathy as Twilight struggled to find an answer. The only thought Twilight could conjure was the price of failure as she looked into her friend's eyes. “Rarity, before we go any further I need one promise from you. I know you're not interested in me or mares romantically or otherwise. The moment you decide you don’t want to pursue this relationship, please just tell me and I will not speak of it again. Pushing you too far and ruining our friendship is the one outcome I couldn’t live with.” Rarity’s eyes softened sadly, “I promise. Now, I believe that is more than enough time spent planning for failure. I wouldn't have offered to date you if I wasn't at least a tiny bit interested and curious. Our friendship is a solid starting point for something more.” "I suppose it is a good place to start Rarity," Twilight replied. "I always thought it was a huge risk because of how important our friendship is to Equestria." "Oh pish-posh," she replied, waving her hoof dismissively. "If our friendship isn't able to survive an attempt at dating, I doubt it would have been strong enough to protect Equestria. Speaking of dating, would you mind if we were discrete about all this?" Twilight nodded, relieved Rarity felt the same way. "I'm not ready for everypony to know about my preference for mares. It was hard enough telling you the truth." Rarity winced sympathetically. "I can only imagine darling. So I believe we should plan a couple outings to test the waters and see what happens." Twilight grinned at the idea of taking Rarity out on a date and tried to ignore the fearful butterflies that were invading her stomach. “That sounds like a lovely idea. I’ll try to come up with something and let you know Rarity.” "I will do the same." Rarity replied with an alluring flip of her hair. "It is a perfect way to find out if this relationship has promise. Now perhaps we could talk about other things for a while. How are Spike and Starlight this morning?" Twilight was happy to move on to more mundane conversation topics now that they had reached plan. While they chatted about inconsequential happenings over their last bit of tea, Twilight's mind was racing trying to grasp an idea about where to take Rarity. She had spent all this time trying to bury her sorrow about an impossible desire. Now she was faced with the challenge of actually winning the heart of a pony who wasn't interested in mares. She buried her rising panic and steeled herself. Somehow, she would come up with a date that would make Rarity happy.