The train ride went without any difficulty. Most of it was spent with the rest of the girls chatting amongst themselves and me looking at the scenery fly by outside the window. Eventually, a loud tiny voice rang over the loudspeakers. “Attention Passengers. We shall be arriving in Ponyville within the next half-hour.”
All the talking between everyone had ceased when the loudspeaker went off. “I think you’re really gonna like Ponyville,” Twilight told me with a smile, “It’s a calm town for the most part, and the ponies there are really nice!”
I nodded, returning the smile. “I think I could use a little bit of calm, especially with what happened yesterday,” I admitted, “As good as I seem to be at it, I don’t want to be fighting all the time.”
Twilight opened her mouth to reply, but before she could say anything, a blue light appeared over my head. As we all stared at it, it dropped something down onto my lap before vanishing. “What… in the sam hell was that?” Applejack said, still staring at where the light was.
I, on the other hand was inspecting what the light had dropped into my lap. “A tape recorder…?” I muttered, picking it up. I noticed that there was a tape inside, so I pressed the play button. ’I’m Big Boss. if you know who that is, my reputation should speak for itself. If you need a hand, play side B.’
Looking up from the recorder, I noticed that everyone else was so busy discussing the light that they hadn’t even heard me play the message. “Big Boss, huh?” I muttered, opening the recorder and turning the tape around before playing it.
Then, we heard a loud bang from the roof of the train, which drew all of our attentions. “What was that!?” Twilight exclaimed. Before anyone could reply, they heard a muffled voice, followed by a few more thumps leading to the side of the train. Then, a yellow mechanical looking arm reached down from the roof and knocked on the window.
“Could someone open the damn window? I do not want to find out what the train equivalent of roadkill is.”
Quickly, I moved over to the window and opened it before sticking my own head out to see who it was. The man was caucasian, with an eyepatch, scars, and a piece of metal stuck through his forehead. “Venom!?”
“Mythic actually,” he replied, “any further discussions can wait until I am no longer at risk of going splat. Stand aside.”
I nodded, still not really sure what was going on. “Uh… Girls, Spike, say hi to Mythic, I guess,” I said, bringing my head back through the window. A few seconds later, Mythic crawled through the window with the ease of someone who had done it before.
“Note to self,” he said as he dusted himself off, “find better way of entering other dimensions. Supply crate is quickly becoming more trouble than it’s worth.”
I and everyone else in the room stared at the man who had just moved through a train window at speed, from the roof. “I can assume this is yours?” I said, holding up the tape recorder.
“In a manner of speaking, that’s my Token,” he said as he held out his hand, “Mythic Snake. Pleasure to meet a fellow MGS Displaced.”
I took his hand and shook it. “Uh… Jack. Jack Crane,.” I said, “I have several questions. One, how’d you do that, two, what’s a Token, and three, Displaced?”
Twilight was standing behind me, “And how are you still alive with that piece of metal in your forehead?”
Snake chuckled, “This is nothing. Phineas Gage got an inch thick steel bar rammed from below his cheek and exited his forehead. Lived 12 more years. True story.”
I looked at him, still wondering what was going on. “And the other questions?”
“Ah, yes. They’re best answered in reverse order. Now, you were at a convention, in costume, bought something from a shady merchant, and got sent to Equestria, or am I wrong?”
I nodded, drawing the Murasama. “Uh... yeah. He was The Merchant, from Resident Evil.”
“Then, you’re a Displaced. There are plenty of us, ranging from Space Marines to Puss in Boots.”
“Puss in Boots?” I asked, my target of confusion changed, “Who goes to a convention dressed as Puss in Boots?”
“Apparently, he put on a pair of cursed boots that sent him to his version of Equestria, so there’s some variation.”
I sighed, “Okay then… So, cursed items are real. Good to know. Now, what are Tokens?”
“Tokens are basically our calling cards. All Displaced are capable of making them, and sending them out into the Void for other Displaced to use to summon them. Although next time,” Snake glanced at the ceiling of the train, “be outside when that happens, please?”
I nodded, “I think I can do that. And for my next question,” I said, placing the Murasama back in its sheath, “How the hell did you do that thing through the window?”
“Navy SEAL before I was Displaced,” Snake said, brushing a gold pin of an eagle perching on an anchor with a trident as a crossbar, clutching a flintlock pistol in its other talon, “Rank of Commander. It wasn’t the first small opening I’ve crawled through.”
“Oh,” I said, “I was an engineering student, which is how I made this to begin with.” I gestured to my body.
“I assume you mean the costume, cause no way you could do the actual cybernetics on a student’s budget,” Snake chuckled.
I shook my head, “No. I made a rough copy of it in a metal shop.” I paused for a moment, “What’s your real name?”
“John,” he replied, “John Andrews.”
“That’s a good name,” I said, “Was it tough getting used to technically not being yourself anymore?”
“First week or so, yeah,” Snake said as he eyed his mechanical arm, “Coulda been worse. At least I dressed as something human.”
“Yeah... “ I said, looking over my arms. “You lost an arm. I lost 98 percent of my body.”
“Arm, and the eye,” Snake chuckled, pointing at his patch, “You’d think it’d be more noticeable.”
I shrugged, “The bandage still lets me see, so eyepatches don’t even register to me anymore.”
“Fair enough,” replied Snake.
Behind the two of us talking, the rest of the ponies and dragon were staring at us with wide eyes. “Uh… Mr. Snake?” Fluttershy asked shyly, even going so far as to raise her hand like she was in a classroom, “Who is this Puss in Boots you mentioned?”
Snake grinned, “Take an orange tabby cat, stand him upright, give him a pair of boots, a stylish hat, a sword, and a spanish accent, and you may now squee.”
Fluttershy’s eyes widened, filling with sparkles as she let out a high pitched gasp. “That’s so adorable!” She squealed, before letting out a strange noise that I had never heard before.
“What’re those… Space Marines ya mentioned?” Applejack asked.
“Well, they’re huge, or at least their armor is. No way in hell they’re going through a door straight on, or without ducking. Each one has enough firepower to make my loadout look like a popgun, and they almost always work in squads of at least 6, backed up by specialists, tanks, and giant robots. I am so glad the one I met was peaceful.”
“Speaking of Giant Robots…” I said, suddenly reminded of something, “I’m assuming you’ve played Phantom Pain. Have you seen the Sahelanthropus?”
“Not yet,” Snake replied, “and yes, you can fight it if I run into him.”
For a reason I couldn’t even decipher, the idea of fighting Sahelanthropus made me very, very happy. “I think I’d enjoy that very much.”
“Speaking of, just a quick heads up,” Snake said, “I heard that villains from the universe of your character can show up, so if someone says ‘Nanomachines son’, don’t be too surprised.”
My eyes widened as Snake said this, and I looked back towards Twilight. Sure enough, her gaze met mine, and I could see that she realized the same thing I did. “So… we might have people like George Sears or Senator Armstrong appear?”
“If you’re just counting the guys he fought after cyborgification, maybe,” Snake replied, “On a related note, I have a side business of secondhand military equipment.”
“So… If I find myself in a war situation, I can call on you, and you can sell me shite?” I questioned.
“I recently aquired a half-dozen tanks, and I haven’t even upgraded my Fulton yet,” Snake replied.
Twilight, probably trying to get her mind off of Metal Gear baddies appearing in Equestria, asked Snake a question. “What’s a Fulton?”
Snake grinned as he pulled a fabric pouch from his back, “Fulton Air Recovery System, basically a very big balloon. Attach this thing to something, or someone, pull the cord, and it’s kissing the clouds before you can blink, ready for a passing plane, or Pegasus in your case, to grab it without having to land, or even slow down.”
“And it looks like a big balloon, right?” I asked, “I’ve honestly only played Rising and a small bit of Snake Eater. Everything else comes from Wiki’s.”
“Pretty much, tied with the good old cardboard box as my favorite bit of equipment,” Snake replied as he put it away.
“How did that even work?” I asked, “In Rising, it was explained by the inside lining resistant to robotic scans, but how did it for the Snakes?”
“As far as I can tell, it’s the fact that cardboard boxes are so common that no one thinks to question ‘em,” Snake replied.
I looked at Snake with a deadpan stare, “Those guards deserve whatever Snake gives them.” I said in the most monotone voice I could muster.
Snake opened his mouth to reply, but a voice from the intercom interrupted him. “We have arrived at Ponyville Station. We here at the Friendship Express would like to thank you for using us as your transport to and from Canterlot and its surrounding cities, and we hope you have a wonderful day.” In the shock of Snake appearing on the top of the train, we hadn’t noticed that the train had been slowly decreasing in speed.
The girls and Spike rushed around, grabbing whatever luggage they had with them in the cabin. “How long will you be staying with us, Mr. Snake?” Twilight asked, putting a few books into a bag.
“I think I’ll stick around for a while,” said Snake, “I just finished a mission, and a donut from Sugarcube Corner sounds like the perfect way to unwind. Besides, still a few things I need to brief the rookie about.”
“Sugarcube Corner?” I asked as we stepped out of the train, “What is that, and why does it seem like it’d give me twenty types of diabetes if I was more organic?” I stopped for a moment, realizing something, “And how do you know what it is?”
Snake opened his mouth to reply, before suddenly closing it as something caught his attention, “I’ll tell you in a minute. Right now, we have guests.”
Noticing the urgency in Snake’s voice, I began to draw the Murasama, only for a jolt to shock me from behind, robbing me of all motor control. I fell to the ground, the Murasama sliding partway from the sheath. “Wha-?” Was all I managed to get out. I could still see, but I couldn’t act as I saw four beings in concealing clothing step towards us, another moving into my vision from the side.
“From one professional to another,” Snake said to them, loosening his pistol in its holster, “I’d recommend you back down.”
The ninjas said nothing, merely drawing their weapons. I saw a katana, bo staff, nunchucks, tonfa, and a glaive. Other than their body types, I couldn’t tell much about them. I could tell that there were two Pegasi, two Earth Ponies, and one Unicorn.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn ya,” Snake said, before drawing his pistol and shooting the unicorn in the head, only to be rewarded with a metallic thunk. “Helmets,” Snake muttered, switching his pistol with his shotgun, “that makes this tricky.”
The pegasus with the katana took to the skies, while the earth ponies with the bo staff and tonfa charged him from the front. The other pegasus with the nunchucks flew around back while the unicorn’s glaive started to crackle with magical electricity. “Eliminate the new one,” the unicorn said, his voice distorted, “Leave the cyborg alive, and knock out the others.”
“I promise to leave you alive for interrogation...” Snake said, before dodging to the side and shooting off the hand of the staff pony with his shotgun, “...unharmed, not so much.”
The pony screamed, grabbing the stump of her hand as the staff fell to the ground. The rest of them stopped their attack and looked back at the unicorn before each of them-barring the one screaming on the ground-vanished in a puff of smoke. The unicorn groaned before readying his glaive. “Then, I’ll do this myself,” he said before charging at Snake, reaching him in a blink of an eye.
Without missing a beat, Snake dropped his shotgun and drew his combat knife, blocking the glaive, “Surrender now, and I’ll knock you out painlessly.”
The unicorn said nothing, simply opting to headbutt Snake, his armored cowl protecting himself from damage and doing more than he would normally.
“Fair enough,” Snake said, before switching his knife to his left hand and jabbing the metallic fingers of his stun arm into a gap in the unicorn’s armor. While normally, the enchantments on the armor would have prevented the resultant electric shock from doing much, as the arm had absorbed the charge that the enchanted glaive would have done to its wielder, but instead, the non-magical electric charge caused the unicorn to spaz out for several seconds before slumping over unconscious. “Should have surrendered.”
At this time, my motor functions had returned enough that I was able to stumble upwards and stand up. “N-n-nice work,” I said, the excess electricity still screwing me up when I tried to talk.
“Not that hard when you’re up against someone who doesn’t even know what a gun is,” Snake said as he lifted the unicorn over his shoulder, “Now, let’s drop these guys off before he wakes up. Mind grabbing the other?”
I nodded, gently picking up the female Earth Pony and carrying her bridal style. “H-h-how far is the nearest hospital?” I asked Twilight. As I said this, the earth pony stared at me, clearly not knowing what I was doing.
She nodded, having been shot out of the stupor she was in along with everyone else. “This way!” she said, leading the way with us following close behind.
Having dropped the earth pony off at the hospital and the unicorn with the proper authorities, we all found ourselves at the place Snake called Sugarcube Corner. It was covered in fake gingerbread, whipped cream and cherries. A diabetics nightmare. “So…” I said, having gotten a creme doughnut, “How did you know about this place?”
“To put in as simple terms as possible, the world we are in right now is based on a TV show that my niece made me watch whenever I was on leave,” Snake said before taking a bite of his double chocolate.
“A… TV show?” I asked, “This world doesn’t seem much like a girls show to me.”
“I said based on. The ponies in the show aren’t anthropomorphic for one thing,” Snake replied.
“Also going to assume that there aren’t mind-warping bug beings in the show…” I shook my head before taking a bite and enjoying the creamy taste, “I had another question I wanted to ask you.”
“Shoot, but first yes, yes there are,” Snake said before turning to Pinkie, “Think I can get a coffee? Cream, no sugar.”
Pinkie nodded, running off as I shook my head, “This show doesn’t seem very kid friendly… But it honestly sounds cool.” I sighed, “Anyway, why did you start going by Mythic Snake?”
“About a week after I arrived, had to rescue an oil tycoon’s daughter, and I had to give him a name,” Snake replied. “That and Venom didn’t seem right to me. Luckily, the magitech angle gave me an excellent alternative.”
“Why not… Just go by your actual name?” I asked, “Did you need a code name or something?”
“Maybe, but I thought I needed to honor the legend, you know? Or, is there another reason you’re calling yourself Jack?” Snake asked with a grin.
“Other than it’s my actual name?” I said, raising my uncovered eyebrow, “No particular reason. I more meant that we’re not actually the person we transformed into.”
“Fair enough,” Snake shrugged, “let’s just agree that we have different opinions on this matter and move on to my last lesson on Displaced.”
I nodded, “Alright, lay it on me.”
“Good. Remember when I was talking about Tokens earlier?” Snake asked.
I nodded, “Yours was the tape recorder, right?”
Snaked nodded in return, “I’m going to teach you how to make your own.”
I straightened, “Go on.”
“Step 1 is pretty simple,” Snake said as Pinkie returned with his coffee, “choose something that represents yourself.”
I stopped, thinking for a moment, before drawing the knife that was kept next to the Murasama. It was similar to the original High Frequency blade, but with a foot long blade and an actual guard on it. “Could this work?”
“Looks good to me,” Snake said before sipping his coffee, “Now, add a message to it. You just have to speak it aloud, although I must admit it was easier for me, given the nature of my Token.”
I thought for a minute. “Harder than it looks…” I said before falling back into silence. Eventually, I spoke up, “My name is Jack, or Raiden. You can call on me if you need assistance in battle, or just someone to talk to. As long as you fight for Justice, my sword is a tool at your disposal.” I looked back over at Snake, “That good?”
“Sounds good,” Snake replied, “All that’s left is to cast it into the void. Just toss it in the air. The laws of the universe should do the rest.”
I looked at him, “Really, just throw it into the air?” I asked, “That’s it?”
“Pretty much, the Void’ll do the rest,” Snake replied.
“Space between universes void?” I asked, as I threw it into the air, “Like from Doctor Who?”
“Pretty much,” Snake replied. At the apex of the knife’s arc, a portal opened up in mid air and sucked the knife in.
I blinked. “Huh. Void portal. Glad none of us are covered in voidstuff.”
“Looks good,” Snake said, finishing his coffee, “One last thing, while a Displaced will automatically go back after a while, you can send them back by saying ‘Our contract is complete’.”
I nodded, “Are you ready to go back?”
“I suppose,” Snake said as he stood up and held out his hand, “Pleasure meeting you.”
I stood up and took his hand, “And you, too.” I let go of his hand with a smile, “John, our contract is complete.”
“Farewell,” Snake said as he stepped outside, “and please, call me Snake.” With that, the Fulton on his belt deployed, launching him into the air and out of sight.
I watched as the balloon vanished, my mind racing with everything I just learned. ’I’m gonna wish I’d never went to that Con eventually, aren’t I?’