Well this wasn't good.
Bones was never particularly skilled at thinking fast, and usually he prepared meticulously to make sure he didn't have to. He certainly did have plans in place for the possibility where he did run into Twilight, but this was a bit of a compromising position she had caught him in. So naturally he said the dumbest thing he could think of.
"Uh. This inst what it looks like."
Scarlet groaned, he could hear her facehoofing behind him.
"Really?" Twilight raised her brow. "Because it looks like a pony who I distinctly remember coming out of a bookshelf several years ago, just knocked out the entire town using some kind of gas bomb."
Bones winced. "Ah, I was hoping you wouldn't remember that. And I can assure you I had very good reasons for knocking out the entire town." Bones needed to start thinking, because he obviously wasn't, and had probably just confirmed all of Twilight's suspicions. It was Bone's turn to facehoof at his stupidity. Technically he was authorized to alter anypony's memories in order to keep his profession a secret, but he was somehow sure that privilege didn't extend to Celestia's favorite student. In any case, he needed to seize the initiative, if Twilight became hostile things were going to get messy, fast.
Bones sighed heavily "Scarlet, get started, I'm going to have a chat with miss Sparkle." He began making his way out of the crowd of sleeping ponies.
"You sure boss?" She was already moving to where Sweetie Belle was sleeping.
Bones gritted his teeth. "Yes, and cover your leg." he was rewarded with an embarrassed squeak as Scarlet realized her leg wrappings had come undone.
"What is she doing?" Twilight asked warily as Scarlet finished covering her leg and placed her horn against the head of one of the ponies.
"Nothing that will harm them, walk with me." Bones played it calm, but his mind was racing as to how to properly manage this situation. He needed to contact the princess, let her know what had happened. Bones knew Twilight's dragon had a way of sending letters to the Celestia. If she gave him permission to alter Twilight's memory, then he could contain things from there, it was simply a matter of subduing Twilight bucking Sparkle. In the meantime, he would just try to buy time, and attempt to satisfy Twilight's curiosity.
Twilight stared at Scarlet for a while longer, probably making sure she wasn't harming anypony, but nothing visible was happening other than Scarlet's horn glowing softly. so she slowly began following Bones.
Bones was actually surprised at how trusting she was, then he remembered not everypony shared his dark profession. His job was to make sure ponies could afford to be so trusting in the first place. "So, you live in the library right? Lets head in that direction." He tried to sound friendly, keeping the anxiety out of his voice.
"Alright, but I expect answers on the way." She sounded hostile, but she fell into step beside him all the same.
"I'll answer what I can." he said after a moments hesitation. Why not? If he got permission to alter her memory, he could just suppress this, and if he didn't, then he would probably be telling her everything anyway. He decided to be at least a little reserved in his answers though, just in case.
"First question, who are you? And what are you doing in Ponyville?" Straight to the point then.
"I am Pale Bones, royal adviser to the princesses of Equestria. I came here by Celestia's personal request. And that was two questions." He recited in the most dignified voice he could muster.
It had the desired effect, Twilight appeared dumbfounded, showing shock, skepticism, then outright doubt.
"You don't exactly look the part." she said, regarding his drab cloak and now windswept mane. Her expression was a blank mask now.
"Well the idea wasn't to stand out." He said matter-of-factly. "I assume you were aware of the situation before we came?"
She looked down at her hooves as she walked. "Yes, it was as if everypony was under some kind of spell, similar to when Discord attacked, but different. I had never seen anything like it before. I locked myself in the library and sent a letter to the princess, then I just looked through my books for a way to stop it." She trailed off.
Bones had heard reports of the Discord incident. Unfortunately he hadn't been much help at the time. He and Scarlet had spent the entire day stuck to the ceiling in The Archive. He shivered, bad memories.
"Well, the princess sent me to take care of it." Bones was trying to avoid looking at Twilight, feeling it was rude for some reason.
"You?" Twilight began examining Bones up and down, re-evaluating him.
"Yes, dealing with these sorts of things is actually my job." He smiled weakly, his bruises were starting to hurt.
"I thought you said you were a royal adviser." she was becoming skeptical again.
Bones snorted "Officially, yes. Unofficially, Scarlet and I are a sort of special task force trained to deal with-" he paused, thinking "-unusual occurrences."
"What sort of unusual occurrences?" She seemed curious now, if not still a bit wary.
Bones shrugged "You know, things you don't read about in most books." He tried dodged the question, but Twilight wasn't giving up that easilly.
"Like?" she pressed.
Bones sighed "Like mind control for one."
Twilight bristled "Mind control? What are you talking about? I mean I've heard of it, but as far as I'm aware its impossible."
They had reached the library now. Bones stopped at the entrance and turned to face Twilight.
"That's what happened here today."
Twilight was stunned into silence for a second time. "But, who?"
Bones shook his head. "It doesn't matter now, Scarlet is taking care of it. They will wake up tomorrow morning and not remember a thing of what happened today. Shall we head inside?" He gestured at the libraries entrance.
"Oh, yes." Twilight opened the door and slipped inside, holding it open for him. He wasn't sure if she believed him just yet, but at least she was being civil.
The inside of Twilight's library was homely and warm. Bones always found the sight of books to be welcoming, regardless of their contents. He was abruptly thankful that Twilight seemed to have forgotten about the whole secret bookcase thing for the time being.
"Are the zombies gone yet?" Twilight's dragon Spike was peeking over the edge of the loft area where Bones suspected the bedroom was. "Who's this guy?"
"For the last time Spike, they were not zombies. They were just, ill. And this is Pale Bones, royal adviser to the princesses." Twilight closed the door as Bones stepped through, and started heading up the stairs towards Spike.
"Spooky name, and I'm pretty sure I would consider zombies ill too." he disappeared from sight as he stood up.
Bones spotted a writing desk out of the corner of his eye, with paper and ink ready and waiting. He looked up to where Twilight was speaking with Spike.
"-I'm just saying, Pale Bones sounds like a zombie name to me."
Bones suppressed a chuckle. He decided he liked Spike. With a bit of focus, he picked up a nearby quill and dipped it in the ink-pot on the desk. He figured Twilight probably wouldn't mind if he wrote a quick letter.
Dear Princess Celestia
I've been compromised by your student, Twilight Sparkle. Frankly I'm surprised this didn't happen sooner, she's far too smart for her own good. She doesn't know everything, just that I'm part of some royal task force that investigates 'unusual occurrences'. Request instructions from here, I could always suppress her memories, but I'm not sure how well that would go down with you, or Twilight for that matter.
Expecting your prompt reply
Pale Bones
"What are you doing?" Twilight asked, just as Bones finished up. He set down the quill and rolled the paper up into a scroll.
"Just writing a letter. Do you think you could deliver it for me?" He held the letter out to her, his magics signature green glow surrounding it.
"I suppose, but only if I can read it first." She walked toward Bones, and her horn shone as she accepted the paper.
Bones quickly retracted the letter from her, his green aura once again taking control of the letter. "I'm afraid I cant let you do that."
"Well why not? Celestia has never withheld something from me before." Twilight pouted.
Bones felt exasperated "I just cant, alright? Its classified."
"Fine." she pulled the letter away from him, the resulting backlash as she took control of the levitation spell was stronger than Bones had expected, he flinched slightly.
"But I get to read the response!" Twilight said as she climbed the stairs again.
Bones opened his mouth to protest, but thought better of it.
Bones, Twilight and Spike were outside sitting at a table and discussing magical theory by the time Celestia's reply came. Or rather, Twilight and Bones were, and Spike was sleeping.
"I'm telling you, I've done it!" Twilight seemed dead serious about this, but Bones still couldn't bring himself to accept it. He had visited other realms of existence, seen deities with his own eyes, and had once had lunch with a demon and lived to tell about it, but he had never once seen any concrete proof that time travel possible. He was about to reply with a rebuttal when there was a low rumble, followed by a loud belch as Celestia's letter appeared in a gout of green flame, Spike did not appreciate this rude awakening.
"Finally." Bones said, snatching it out of the air before Twilight could react. "Its nearly dusk." He carefully unsealed and unfurled it, reading:
My loyal subject Pale Bones
My most sincere apologies for my late reply, I was indisposed and was not aware of the urgent nature of your letter. Thank you for informing me of the situation, I have a solution to the problem, and will enact it presently. In the meantime, you may NOT use black magic on my protege Twilight Sparkle, you may NOT discuss any more sensitive information information with her, do NOT let her read this letter.
Sincerely
Princess Celestia
Well that was helpful.
Twilight was looking at Bones expectantly. "Well?"
Bones gave her a pained smile, and incinerated the letter instantly with a thought.
"Hey!" Twilight blurted, rising from her seat "You were supposed to let me read that!" She sounded quite indignant.
"I'm sorry, Celestia's orders." Bone said, trying to placate her. He really did feel pretty bad about it, even if he had never technically agreed to let her read the princesses reply.
Twilight plopped back down on her chair, looking dejected. "I just don't see what the princess would want to keep secret from me."
Bones pondered for a moment before coming up with a stupid response. "If it makes you feel better, its for your own good."
She looked up at him, almost pitying his lack of tact. "That doesn't make me feel better."
"Oh hey there you two, enjoying yourselves?" Scarlet had appeared from seemingly nowhere, and was approaching their little picnic table outside the library.
Bones's stomach dropped, he had nearly forgotten about leaving Scarlet to take care of all the sleeping ponies.
"Oh, hey Scarlet. How are things?" he said, rather awkwardly. Bones simply could not remember how to talk like an intelligent pony today.
She sat down across from Twilight. "Oh you know, just finished wiping the memories of every pony in Ponyville." she sounded livid, and was glaring into Bones's very soul.
"And cleaning up the massive mess outside and in Rarities Boutique." She sighed and added "The filly is fine too, she shouldn't remember anything when she wakes up."
That was a relief.
Scarlet certainly had a reason to be upset, but she seemed more tired than anything. She began resting her head on the table. "What have you two been up to?"
Twilight didn't seem to be in the mood for talking, probably feeling betrayed by her mentor, and was ignoring Bones's silent plea's for help.
He deflated, and resigned himself to Scarlet's passive-aggressive fury. "Just talking, mostly."
Scarlet harrumphed and didn't answer. Bones found himself between two angry mares, and a very confused looking baby dragon.
It was going to be a long night.
Authors note: MY FINGERS ARE POWERED BY COMMENTS.