Grey. That was the outlook on things; grey. Grey, the colour of all emotion. Grey, the light in the eyes of those who were left. Grey, the colour of the sky since the Root came, and grey the feeling in her heart since she'd lost everything.
A small campfire was set in the centre of a collapsing building, once rich with colour, now drowned in the omnipresent blandness of the world. Rubble and cloth and dust and bone tumbled with the occasional breeze, and with it, reminders of the failure that she had brought upon Equus.
Sometimes, it would shower. Not rain (there hadn't been any rain in nearly two years), but ash. It sprinkled and it floated through the air, carelessly, until it eventually hit the ground, piling up with the specs that came before it. Sometimes, she liked to stare at the offending particles as they fell to the ground. Dull, green eyes would track them as they fell, or as they crumbled under her cracked horseshoes, or as they covered yet another victim. It was often hard to breathe.
She remembered how it happened, too. How the world that she loved, the creatures, the friends, her life fell away under her. She remembered when the eclipse came, and when both celestial bodies fell, and how the sheer madness of the world seemed to cry out at their falling, how trees twisted into fire and houses collapsed into endless pits, how magic itself seemed to have disappeared.
And she remembered how life had frozen, in that awful flash of indigo. Just for a split second; she remembered how the air tasted like fury and anguish and sorrow and guilt.
More importantly; she remembered who's fault it was. She remembered how she had trusted one pony too many, shown one too many kindness, and invited that evil into her life and the lives of her friends.
Kindness? Pfft. What a joke. Some Element she'd turned out to be.
It was numbing, really. To have stories told of what Fluttershy used to be like. Of how she was so shy and caring to all the animals (ha! animals. none of those anymore!), and how her "kindness" had been a light to so many ponies. Tartarus, the pegasus herself couldn't remember anything beyond the Root's appearance, not because she'd received brain damage or a curse or any of that nonsense.
Fluttershy couldn't remember the past, because she didn't want to remember the past. It was like purposely pouring lemon juice into a cut. It burned and it stung and oh did it ache to think of the past. Because the past was where her friend were. Where she'd left them, where they'd been sent to by him.
The once kind, open-minded and timid pony (now turned cynical, resentful, agonised) acknowledged the fact that yes, while the Prince may not have been in control at the time, he still spent so much of his time in that damned hibernation of his, those strange Magical Trances that he'd fall into for months at a time, while 'Shy and her friends and the princesses and his damn brother would face Maker knew what in the meantime.
Over the years, yes, Fluttershy had come to resent the existence of Quantum Herring. The Prince that broke her friend's heart. The Alicorn that slept through crises, after crises, after crises. In fact, she remembered that the only time he'd been 'awake' for a major event was when Discord re-emerged, and even then, he'd only had to touch the cursed being and hey-presto, he's back to normal, Infinitus walks the world once more.
Yes. Fluttershy knew she was being rather silly. The Time Mage had been cursed and burdened with so much, but it didn't help watching the body of said Prince exile her best friends to the furthest reaches of the Flow itself, leaving her, abandoning her in the now. All of her emotion had just burst forth from then and she just associated her life, her existence with the sickly grin of Faux-Quantum.
But Quantum, all the same.
She sat in the ruins of her cottage. It was held together by a few pieces of tarpaulin, tape, and a lot of luck. It wasn't anything luxurious, certainly, nothing like what it once was. But it was home, her space. A place where she could unwind, could be herself and at least imagine things were alright, especially if she dreamed hard enough and she jammed her eyes shut and she just tried not to cry.
Because out in the world? In the wasteland of Equestria? Fluttershy was "Ma'am" or "Madame" or "Ms" or...
"Kindness". That's what the ponies called her, because she tried her best to save each and everypony, no matter the cost or effort required. Her status as an Element had made her a leader, despite her protestations and denials. So, Fluttershy had grown into the role. She had hardened into the role of Ma'am, and she was sure that it was now, the right decision. For what it was worth, Ms Kindness had saved many a life since the Collapse. And now, it was paying off.
"Ma'am," a voice said, accompanied by a knock at her improv door. Fluttershy donned her mask, her straight, no-nonsense face.
"Ah, yes?" She replied, voice surprisingly strong given her trip down memory lane. The door creaked open, and the form of Rex Blueblood appeared before her. She smiled inwardly, how far the unicorn had come from stuck-up rich stallion, to her second-in-command. Funny, what the complete collapse of society can do to somepony.
"We think it's ready. The spell is linked to the artefact," he smiled at her, weary and beaten, but full of that confidence she'd seen more and more as time went one, "We're just waiting on you now."
'The spell', referred to the project Fluttershy and her merry band of survivors had been working on. Since the collapse, she'd been searching for a way to fix their mess, to undo what was done to her, and so many other's lives. Luckily, Kindness had been given a few willing (and maybe even foolish) ponies on her travels that had offered to infiltrate the fortress of Canterlot (or what was once Canterlot), and retrieve as many spellbooks and magical artefacts as possible. Rex Blueblood had surprisingly spear-headed the operation, and hit the figurative jackpot. He had got his hooves on the Herring Grandfather clock, and all the weird, unknown energies that it had absorbed from it's most recent owner with it. With a few tomes scavenged from the four corners of Equestria, and a lot of guesswork, the survivors spent day and night working on Project Turnback. Shaking her head, she smiled at the dusty-white unicorn.
"Waiting for me? Well, I suppose we should try it, then," And so Fluttershy rose, and made for the exit to her cottage, knowing full-well that it could be the last time she saw the place, at least, in that condition. "Shall we, Rex?"
In silence, the two made their way to the ruins of Ponyville, and Fluttershy noted with no small amount of surprise, that there was a feeling welling in her stomach.
Hope.